by Jamie Begley
“He could have told me at five when I was making coffee in the kitchen. Would have saved him having to sneak back in.”
Ginny started worrying her upper lip when her lower one split. “He probably didn’t hear you.”
Technically, it wasn’t a lie. Gavin wouldn’t have heard Silas in the kitchen from where he left.
“Quit biting your lips. Never play poker, Ginny. You always bite them when you’re trying to get out of lying.”
“I’m not lying—”
“I didn’t say you were,” Silas patiently continued with the same rapport they had shared from before her family had been torn apart. “I said trying.”
Ginny sat at the same spot she used to sit, where she could see cars passing on the road below through the trees. She and Silas would sit there every evening and watch the cars as they talked. He had listened as if her feelings were the most important things to him. So much of the advice he had given her she still used today. Silas was being too kind and honest to continue bluffing that Gavin hadn’t left last night.
“I don’t know where he went,” she admitted. “Are you going to ask him to leave?”
“No. I’m not concerned that he could have been infected while he was out. What I am concerned with is him not knowing the dogs have the run of the property at night. If Moses hadn’t pulled the dogs back, Reaper would be nursing several bite marks this morning.”
“Or still stuck in a tree. Remember when Lindsey wanted to surprise you with a box of Valentine’s candy. If Isaac hadn’t heard her screaming, she would still be stuck up in that tree.”
“She learned her lesson and never came back to the property.”
Ginny finally understood what Silas was trying to do. “You want him to stay.”
“Wasn’t that what I was saying?”
“You like him, don’t you?”
“Reaper is a hard man to like, but yes, I do.”
“I do, too,” Ginny admitted, smoothing her hands over her thighs.
“I know.” Silas placed his hand over hers.
“Am I that obvious?”
“To me.” He smiled. “I also know how you knew Reaper didn’t spend the night in his bed.”
Blushing at what Silas was imagining had her barging ahead before her words could catch up. “Nothing happened … I swear… He has troub— Gavin doesn’t sleep well.”
“Slow down, Ginny. You’re over eighteen, and so is he.”
“It’s not like you’re thinking.”
“Ginny ….” Silas tried to slow her down again.
“I wouldn’t disrespect you by … in your home.”
“I heard him too. You calm him down so he can sleep.”
“Yes. Please don’t say anything to him. He wouldn’t want you to know. Gavin doesn’t even realize I’m there.”
“Maybe not consciously, but he knows you’re there,” he told her.
“You think so?”
“Yes. I think he was treated so badly that his mind is in constant pain, and he can’t hide from it when he’s sleeping.”
“I don’t think he can hide from it when he’s awake.”
Silas nodded in sad agreement. “For a few hours a night, you give him peace. I’m glad he found you.”
“We found each other. I’m in love with him.”
“Does it feel the way you expected?”
“No, it’s so much more, Silas. What I feel is like I was walking along, and suddenly I found this insanely perfect rose that was just waiting for me.” Becoming embarrassed at the way Silas was looking at her, she dropped her gaze. “I’m being silly, aren’t I? I’m too old to be talking like a ten-year-old.”
“I hope you never get too old to stop talking that way. You’re a songwriter, and you describe your feelings with beautiful words. Don’t be embarrassed that your music gives you the ability to open hearts.”
“Gavin’s isn’t opening. He can’t wait to get away from me.” She sorrowfully stared at the road below. It wouldn’t be long before Gavin went down the same road, without her.
Silas moved his hand from hers to lift one of his legs onto the porch. “The way he has nightmares, what happened to him left a mark. Your perfect rose has been trampled so badly that it’s afraid to open its petals, afraid for fear of being crushed again. Have you heard of the Rose of Jericho?”
“No. But, to be fair, botany was my least favorite subject.”
“Pa taught us about them. They’re called resurrection plants. Starved for water and care, they wither away until water brings them back to life. Reaper has strong roots, but they’ve grown so strong and deep just to survive that it’s going to take extra love and care to bring him back to his full beauty.”
“He’s beautiful to me the way he is now.”
“He doesn’t feel that way about himself.” Silas cupped his hand over his knee.
“What can I do?” she whispered, seeing Gavin was finished cleaning her car. He had volunteered to clean and wash it for her and, in return, she had offered to make him a homemade pizza and peach pie.
“All you can do is keep pouring your love on him and keep your heart open so he can walk in when he’s ready.”
“I can do that.” Jumping up, she looked down at her brother. “Thank you. I needed a pep talk.”
“You’re welcome.”
Re-energized by Silas advice after a sleepless night wondering where Gavin had gone or if he would be coming back, she went to work making dinner. Humming, she started making the dough. That accomplished, as it was rising in a warm bowl by the stove, she started making the pie.
Once everything was done, they sat down to dinner. Ginny ate her pizza, listening to Silas and Gavin discuss gas and electric motorcycles.
“Would any of the Last Riders consider buying one?” Silas asked.
“Rider has a Zero SR/S. He uses it regularly, but he likes to collect different cars and motorcycles. Most of the brothers who have the kind of money to buy an electric motorcycle would just go ahead and buy their dream one.”
“I don’t see many of The Last Riders or the Predators riding them. Most of them would just buy one of Stud’s.”
“You know Stud designs motorcycles?”
Ginny choked on a bite of pizza at her slip. Stud didn’t advertise that he designed and made motorcycles.
Thinking quickly, she took a drink of water to buy herself more time. “Rider has one.” Hoping she was telling the truth, Ginny excused herself to go to the kitchen for the pie.
When she came back, Silas and Gavin had switched topics and were talking about movies. Slicing the pieces, she gave a generous serving to Gavin and gave Silas and herself smaller portions. She wanted to go through the floor when Gavin noticed the size different. She had been thrown off-kilter by discussing Stud.
“I’m not that hungry.” Gavin started to slide his dessert to Silas.
“Ginny knows I’m on a diet. I was complaining to her while you were cleaning out the car. I’ve gained five pounds since she’s been here.”
Satisfied at Silas’s explanation, Gavin started eating his pie.
“What are we going to do after dinner?” Ginny asked, spooning a piece into her mouth. With Gavin being out all night, she expected him to say he was going to bed early.
“Do you have a deck of cards?” Gavin asked. “We could play poker.”
Silas gave him an innocent smile. “I guess we might have an old deck in one of the drawers.” Cutting himself another piece of pie, Silas pushed the pie plate toward Gavin. “Been so long since we’ve played. The kids lost all the chips. I have a few fivers on me if you’re game?”
Ginny wiggled her eyebrows at Gavin, trying to send him a silent message. It failed.
Gavin pulled out his wallet and spread his money beside his plate. “I have a few myself.”
“Ginny, get my wallet from the drawer by the front door.” Giving Gavin a self-effacing look, Silas scraped the last bite of pie onto his spoon.
Ginny hid
her smile behind her napkin.
“You want to deal, or do you want me to?” Gavin asked.
“You. The arthritis in my hands makes it hard.”
Ginny lowered her napkin, wiggling her eyebrows again. The result was just as ineffective as before.
Gavin skillfully shuffled the deck. Recognizing his card mastery display, she realized he’d seen her caterpillar eyebrow and was trying to reassure her he knew what he was doing. “You playing, Ginny?”
“No, I’ll do the dishes. You two are on your own.” Ginny raised her hands in the air in surrender. She had warned him; her conscience was clear.
“You ready?” Gavin paused with his fingers poised over the cards.
“As long as you remember this is just a friendly game. I don’t plan on losing my last pay check.”
“Just as long as you remember the same.”
Ginny rolled her eyes as she stood to gather the dishes. The two men were unaware that they were staring at each other like greedy sharks, seeing their willing victims over their cards.
She would stay and watch, but bloodbaths had a way of splattering during the kill.
Chapter Thirty-Six
“I walked right into that, didn’t I?”
Ginny took the box from Gavin that Silas had sent him upstairs to give her. She had to yell down asking for one when she heard Silas say he needed to go check on the generators with the storm coming in during the middle of night.
Holding back her laughter, she gave Gavin a commiserating look. “Yes, you did. But don’t feel bad. We were raised knowing how good he is, and he would sucker us in every time.”
Her hand trembled when Gavin sat down on her bed. The box was between them, but she took to heart that he hadn’t sat on the other twin bed.
“I used to think I was good, but he left me in the dust. The first hands, I thought it was just being out of practice. I hadn’t played since—” Gavin broke off, staring down at what she was storing in the box.
“Since you were kidnapped?” she softly finished for him.
“Even before that, I hadn’t played for almost a year. The last game I played was in the club in Ohio.”
Ginny reverently wrapped a Cabbage Patch doll in tissue paper. “You remember your last game? You must have lost a lot of money to remember the time and place.”
“The money isn’t why I remember it. It was the last time the brothers were together, having a good time … until Rider and I got into an argument.”
Placing the doll into the box, Ginny picked up a children’s Bible with the pages dipped in fake gold. She smoothed her fingers over the worn leather instead of looking at Gavin. “What makes hur—” Ginny stopped to correct herself, to delicately probe, afraid of Gavin shutting down. “What made you remember it the most? Because it was the last time you spent with them having a good time or fighting with Rider?”
Gavin picked up a small trophy. “The fight.”
“What was the fight about?”
“Taylor. Rider called her a tag chaser.”
Ginny frowned. “Rider had to be mad at you for him to say that.”
Gavin looked up from his perusal of the trophy. “Why?”
“Because you don’t insult someone’s fiancé without a reason.” Ginny shrugged. “At least in Kentucky, we don’t.”
“Memphis started an argument when he lost … it boiled over into Rider and I arguing.”
“Now I understand why you remember.” Ginny sighed. “You regret arguing with Rider.”
“I hit him.” Gavin laid the trophy down to pick up a wooden stewer stick that had different colors of construction paper glued to the top. “What’s this?”
Ginny took the stick from him. Placing the stick between her hands, she started rubbing her palms. “A rainbow spinner.”
Gavin took the stick back, mimicking her motions. “Cute.” Setting the spinner down, he picked up a Rubik’s cube and began to change the mixed-up colors.
Ginny kept sorting through the remnants of her childhood.
“The day I had to go live with someone else after Freddy and Leah died, I told Silas that I hated him. I’ll never forget the look on his face.” Blindly, Ginny stared down into the memory-filled box. “I could have come home any time after I turned eighteen, but I didn’t. I think I still wanted to hurt him, and it was easier to blame Silas than admit how badly I hurt him. He tried to talk to me in town; I told him I was busy and left.”
“How did you start talking again?”
“When I finally accepted Silas had nothing to apologize for. I was holding in how bad I felt about the way I acted, and I was blaming him for not making me feel better. Kind of screwy, right?” Lifting her eyes, she saw Gavin watching her. “The last time I came here to see them, all I had to do was walk through the door, and it was like I had never left.”
“So, you forgave Silas?”
“I forgave myself.” Ginny rose from the bed to go to a wooden chest of drawers, picking up the little iron farm animals. None had dust on them. Silas had kept the contents clean, as if waiting for her to come back. Tears clogged her throat at the time she had wasted. Moving back to the bed, one by one, she wrapped them in tissue paper before storing them in a shoe box.
“Why are you boxing your things?”
“These aren’t mine; they’re Leah’s. Silas asked me to. He wants me to have them.”
“You’re leaving her star chart hanging up?”
“That stays.”
Gavin rose from the bed. “Did Silas mention the charts are wrong?”
Ginny turned from the box to see Gavin leaning over Leah’s bed to get a better view of her chart. “What do you mean?”
“The ones I saw in Silas’s room had two different constellations. He said they were star charts of the night he and your father were born. Leah’s is right, as it only has one.” Moving back to her bed, Gavin went to the chart hanging over her bed. “Yours is wrong, like theirs.”
“What did Silas say about them being wrong?”
“Nothing really. I told him he should contact the person who made them. Silas said he probably wouldn’t, since they were a gift from your father.”
“I still see him hanging them. I wish you could have known him. You would have liked him.”
“Could I have beaten him at poker?”
Wrapping an iron rooster, Ginny laughed. “No. Who do you think taught Silas to play?
“Could you hand me the plaque behind the jewelry box on the dresser?” With humor, Ginny peered at Gavin as he found the plaque.
“Silas owes me three hundred dollars.”
“Losers weepers.” Quoting half the old saying, Ginny took the plaque from Gavin.
“Please tell me this is the only tournament Silas played in.”
“I would, but it would be a lie.”
Gavin looked toward the doorway ruefully, as if hoping Silas would walk past.
“I tried to warn you.”
“Exactly when was that?”
“I wiggled my eyebrows.”
“I thought you were telling me to take it easy on him.”
“No, it was warning. When I took the pie away from Silas, that was me telling him to take it easy on you.”
“Well, he fucking didn’t.”
“Neither did you,” she reminded him.
“How fucking good is he?”
“He won every poker tournament he’s played in. Last year, I believe he won the International Tournament in Las Vegas.”
Gavin’s left eyelid began twitching.
“If he wins such big pots, why did he work at the lumber yard so long?”
“The lumber yard has the best insurance in the county, and Silas needed that when they were all younger. He’s comfortable enough now with the boys having their own business that he can financially handle just Fynn’s medical care. You’re not really mad, are you? I was going to tell you. It just never came up. Then you were the one who wanted to play. I didn’t want to disappoint you.
You were in such a good mood.”
“I’m not now.”
“I can see that,” she soothed him. “I thought, what could the harm be when you were only playing with five-dollar bills?”
“It went to twenties real fast.”
“I kind of thought Shade would have mentioned Silas played. He watched the tournament with me—it was televised.”
Both of Gavin’s eyelids began twitching. “He didn’t.”
“Are you mad at me? I didn’t—”
“No. I know exactly who’s to blame.”
“Who?” she asked innocently.
“Shade. The brother is dead meat when I get ahold of him.”
“You really wouldn’t hurt Shade.” Ginny made a face of disbelief at him.
“Shade doesn’t have four legs.”
“Rough night?”
Ginny moved to the side to let Silas fill his thermos. Blowing on her cup of black coffee, she put a slice of bread in the toaster. “Yes,” she answered in a low voice, not wanting Gavin to hear if he was awake. “He spent most of the night trying to claw the mattress.”
“Were you able to get any sleep?”
“Some. It took him three hours to fall asleep before I could slip in his room. Do you want some toast?”
“No, thanks.”
Pushing the lever of the toaster down, she went to the refrigerator for the preserves. “I promised myself I wouldn’t go inside his room. I sat on the steps, telling myself I wouldn’t.” Ginny closed the refrigerator door, empty-handed. Pressing her forehead against the door, she couldn’t hold back her tears any longer.
Silas pulled her away from the fridge and into his arms. “I saw you. I was relieved when you went in. I couldn’t take it any longer myself. I was going to break and wake him up. Probably would have gotten my ass kicked for the effort.”
Ginny reached for a paper towel next to her. “Good thing you didn’t. He’s mad at you.”
“He was good.” Silas took the paper towel from her, wiping her tears away. Then, opening the refrigerator, he took out the preserves to give her. “Just not as good as me.”
“Not many are.” After making her toast, she went to take a seat at the table.