“What time is it?” I half sat up, leaning back on my elbows.
“Ten-thirty.”
Shit. There was no way in hell I was going to be able to go back to sleep now. I was lucky to get three hours of uninterrupted sleep a night. My little siesta at nine-thirty wasn’t going to bode well for me sleeping anymore. “I’ll get out of your hair, sugar.” If she was tired, she didn’t need me bugging her.
“You’re fine. I just didn’t think the floor could be very comfortable.”
I stood up and brushed my hand down my shirt. “Like I said, I’ve slept in far worse places.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’m not in the mood to hear stories of your debauchery.”
I shook my head. “Not what I’m talking about. Once I hit eighteen, I never slept in a shit place, because I always had a home with the Lords.”
She tilted her head, and her hair fell in her eyes. “What about before you turned eighteen?”
I reached out, not even thinking, and brushed her hair back. She froze instantly, and I knew I had crossed a line. I took a step back and put my hands in my pockets. “I was in and out of foster homes.”
“What?”
“Um, I said I was in foster care. My parents didn’t want me when I was born. I lived in a shit county that didn’t try to find me adoptive parents, so I lived in about ten foster homes before I aged out of the system.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Not a big deal. Lots of kids go through it, I was just lucky to make it out.”
“Um, I was in foster care too,” she whispered. “My dad died when I was six, and my mom couldn’t handle it.”
“Fuck, sugar.” I didn’t care if I had a shit life, but I didn’t want that for Nikki.
She shrugged and ran her fingers through her hair. “It was like my mom wanted me, but she missed my dad real bad, and then got into drugs.”
Her voice was quiet and timid. “Nikki, you don’t have to tell me. It’s okay.”
She ignored me completely. “I remember coming home from school, and my mom was passed out at the kitchen table. She was still breathing, but I couldn’t wake her up. I ran upstairs pounding on all of the neighbors’ doors until someone answered. We didn’t live in a nice apartment, but thankfully the person who answered my frantic knocking helped me. Social Services scooped me up so quickly, I didn’t even see if my mom was okay. They kept telling me over and over she was fine, but I couldn’t live with her anymore. I got it, but there was still a side that just wanted my mom.” She shook her head and looked down at the floor. “I have no idea why I just told you that.”
“I don’t either, sugar, but I’ll listen. Whatever you want to say, I’m here.”
She looked up with tears in her eyes. “But for how long?”
“How long for what?”
She swiped at her nose and looked to the right. “How long are you here for, Pipe?”
I didn’t know what to say. What was the right thing to say? For as long as she wanted me here? “I…well…”
She put her hand on my face and shook her head. “Nevermind. Get out.” She stalked to the door and threw it open.
Fuck.
“Nikki, look, I don’t know—”
“I know you don’t know, Pipe. That’s the damn problem.”
I grabbed her hand and pulled her to me. She tried to pull away, but I wasn’t going to let her go before I said what I need to. “I don’t know what to say to make this shit better.”
“Well, you need to say something. Something more than you don’t know.”
“I’m sorry.”
She threw her head back and laughed. “You’re sorry for what? For being a man? For sleeping with me? You’re sorry for even meeting me? What the hell are you sorry for, because from where I’m standing, there's a list of things.”
“I’m sorry about that night. I didn’t know.” Mother fuck, this shit was hard. Who the hell wanted to sit around and talk about their feelings?
“You didn’t know what?”
Fuck. This was like pulling teeth. My fucking teeth. “I didn’t know what the fuck to do with you. We had fucking amazing sex and then I had no idea what to do. I’ve never been with a chick and actually wanted to be around her when we weren’t having sex.”
“So what? I was just supposed to hang around until you pulled your head out of your ass and decided you actually wanted to talk to me when my clothes were on?” She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at me.
I was losing ground fast. “I did spend time with you before we had sex when your clothes were on. It was after we had sex I couldn’t figure out how to still have sex with you and you know, hang out.”
“Jesus, Cora was right.” Nikki paced the short length of the living room. “You really don’t know how to do a relationship. A part of me feels sorry for you.”
Hey, I wasn’t above her feeling sorry for me. She was at least feeling something for me. “I don’t know how to fix this.”
She threw her hands up in the air and stopped mid-pacing. “There’s nothing you need to do because we weren’t anything when I walked in on you. We didn’t make promises to each other. So my head is telling me I can’t be mad at you, my heart says I should tell you to get lost, and my body, well, my body sucks.”
A smirk spread across my lips. “Your body does not suck, sugar.”
She rolled her eyes and waved her hand in the air. “No, my body thinks it wants you.”
I shook my head and grabbed her hand. “No, your body needs me, just like mine needs you.”
“That may be true, but I can’t think with only my body.”
I pulled her close and wrapped my other arm around her waist. “Then how about you just feel with your body.”
She closed her eyes and slightly shook her head. “I can’t. Not yet.”
“Yet?”
She opened her eyes and tilted her head back to look up at me. “Because the last time we did that, I ended up moving an hour away. I’m kind of fond of Kales Corners for the time being.”
“Does that mean I need to leave?” Please Lord, don’t say yes.
She bit her bottom lip, and her eyes shifted down. “Um, I guess you’re okay living over there.”
“But am I okay being here, right now?”
A smile spread across her lips, and she looked up. “Maybe a little too close.”
I pressed a quick kiss to her forehead and took a step back. “Better?”
A laugh bubbled from her lips. “For now.”
And the carefree, sexy angel I knew surfaced for two seconds when her eyes connected with mine. “Sugar, I love when you look at me like that.”
She ducked her head. “Damn you,” she whispered.
I was pushing her. She wanted me, and I wasn’t going to let her run from it anymore. She had come to me that night to be with me, and I had been a dumbass by not recognizing it. “What are you guys up to tomorrow?” I wanted to push her, but not away from me.
“Um, I think Karmen mentioned driving to some state park nearby and having a picnic. I really don’t know what she’s thinking half of the time. Cora isn’t into nature, and I don’t think Karmen is up for hiking.”
“Yeah, I can’t really imagine you three traipsing through the woods with a picnic basket. I figured the mall would be more your speed.”
Nikki ran her fingers through her hair and laughed. “Definitely more my thing. I’m more of a nature in small segments kind of girl. You know, while walking from my house to my car is a good bit of nature for me. But Karmen was all gung-ho about the park today, so who knows where we’re going to end up.” Nikki smothered a yawn with the back of her hand and sighed.
I brushed her hair back from her face. “I should let you get some sleep, sugar. Whatever you guys end up doing, you’re going to need your strength.”
“Um, are you going to come with us? You know, uh, well, because of Cora,” she stuttered.
“Yeah, I suppose I should be there.” Wrec
ker had told me I needed to keep a close eye on Cora, so the fact Nikki was going to be with her the whole time worked perfectly. “Knock on my door when you guys figure out what you’re going to do.”
She nodded and took another step back from me. I had pushed her far enough tonight. I got to touch her, and she hadn’t flinched away. Definitely progress.
“See you in the morning, sugar.” I slipped out the front door and waited ‘til I heard the lock slip into place before I pulled a cigarette out and lit the end of it.
I may have spent the whole night with Nikki and her friends, but I found out she still wanted me. Even though she was fighting it, I knew she wanted me.
Fuck yeah.
*
Chapter 18
Nikki
“I don’t want to leave. I’m going to tell Nickel I’m moving to Kales Corners. It’s so peaceful here.”
“Yeah, well, I’m pretty sure if you’re not home in an hour, Nickel’s going to come here, throw you over his shoulder, and never let you leave again.”
Karmen tapped her chin. “The whole throwing me over his shoulder thing sounds pretty damn hot.”
Cora slammed her door and rolled down the window. “Get in the car, woman. As much as I loved being here, I’m looking forward to sleeping in my own bed tonight, alone.”
Karmen wrapped me up in a hug and whispered in my ear. “Call me whenever, okay? And make sure you give Pipe hell.”
“Love you,” I laughed.
“Love you too.”
Cora waved as Karmen backed down the driveway, and Pipe came to stand next to me.
“Gonna miss them?” he asked.
“Yes and no.”
“That’s not the answer I expected.”
“I’m going to miss them, of course, but I’m glad to have my house back to myself. Karmen can be a little exhausting at times.”
Pipe nodded. “I can totally see that.”
Karmen and Cora were gone, and now I had no idea what to do with Pipe. I knew he was only hanging out with us before because of Cora, and now that she was gone, to say this was awkward was an understatement.
“When do you go back to work?”
“Um.” I shuffled my feet nervously and kicked a rock. “Tomorrow, twelve to eight.”
“You like working there?”
I looked up at him. “It pays the bills. Can’t really ask for much more.”
“Can I ask a question?”
I really wish he wouldn’t. I would much rather run into my house and hide ‘til work tomorrow. I wasn’t kidding when I said I was exhausted from this weekend. “Hit me with it. Can’t make a promise I’ll answer.”
He pulled out a cigarette and held it between his fingers. “Am I wasting my time here?”
I cleared my throat and hitched my thumb over my shoulder. “I think I’m going to head into the house.”
“Not gonna answer me, huh? I see how it is. You’re gonna string me along then drop me like a sack of shit when you find a better deal.”
I laughed and shook my head. “That’s hardly what I’m doing, but if that’s what you wanna think, that’s fine.”
“Then tell me what you’re doing.”
“Trying not to get hurt again. See ya later, Pipe.” I walked back into the house, flipped the lock on the door, and leaned against it, sliding down to my butt.
Was that too harsh? Should I have told him he wasn’t wasting his time?
I was terrified he was going to freak out if we hooked up, and then I would be back in the same spot again. I wanted to try, but dammit if the man didn’t terrify me.
I scooted back, reached up to unlock the door, and swung it open. “Pipe,” I called.
He spun around, still standing in the same spot I had left him. “Yeah, sugar? You okay?”
I had to look like a fool sitting on my ass opening the door. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just, uh, don’t leave.” I slammed the door shut and scrubbed my hands down my face.
God that was a fool thing to do, but if I didn’t tell him I wanted him around, how was he going to know?
So, for now, he knew I didn’t want him to leave. What I was going to do with him, I had no clue, but I at least knew he wasn’t going anywhere soon.
*
Pipe
I wasn’t going anywhere.
*
Chapter 19
Nikki
“Come over.”
I rolled over on my back and looked at the time. “Alice, it’s almost ten o’clock. I’m not coming over. I’m already in bed.”
“But you sound sad.”
I rolled my eyes and bounced out of bed. “I’m not sad, I’m just confused.”
I hadn’t talked to or seen Pipe since I told him not to leave. Not one single word. That was six days ago, and I was starting to wonder if he had packed up and left.
“Not sad, Alice.”
“Well, whatever the hell you are, I don’t like it. This man has got you all twisted up yet again.”
I laughed and opened the fridge. “Maybe he’s giving me space?”
Alice scoffed. “The man should be groveling at your feet every second. Have you talked to Karmen about it? Maybe she has seen him in Weston.”
I grabbed the gallon of vanilla ice cream out of the freezer and a can of root beer. “I talked to her Tuesday, I think. She’s busy at work and getting more pregnant by the day. She claims the baby is taking over her body.”
“Well, maybe you should go over there. Say you’re doing a welfare check.”
I grabbed a spoon and pried the lid off the container of ice cream. “Um, what?”
“I’ve been watching too many cop shows lately, sorry. Just go over there and say hey. He’ll take it from there.”
I dropped two huge scoops into my cup. “Yeah, maybe some other time, Alice. I don’t think he would appreciate that this late at night.” A flash of light startled me, and my eyes shot to the front window. “Oh, my God,” I gasped.
I dropped the phone and ice cream scoop and backed further into the kitchen to the sliding door.
Someone was standing outside my house on the sidewalk, and I think they just took a picture of me. My heart raced, and I racked my brain trying to figure out what to do. I backed up to the sliding door, my hand gripping the handle and I slid it open far enough to slip out.
Pipe.
Pipe would help me.
My eyes scanned my back yard, my feet carrying over to Pipe’s backdoor on their own accord.
I banged on the glass, whipping my head back and forth and making sure whoever was out front hadn’t come around back.
“Pipe,” I whispered. God, please, let him be home.
The light flipped on in the hallway, and my heart soared when he walked into the kitchen shirtless and running his fingers through his hair.
“Nikki, what the hell are you doing here?”
Jesus, my heart sank realizing those were the same words the last time I showed up at his house unannounced.
This was different, though. I was scared for a completely different reason that had nothing to do with him.
I put a hand on his muscled stomach and pushed him into the house. I slid the door shut behind me and twisted the lock. I looked up at him and gulped. “Someone is outside, and I think they were taking pictures of me.”
Pipe tensed and twisted around to look out his front window. “Are you sure?”
“I’m sure there was someone watching me. I was in the kitchen talking to Alice, and I saw a flash from the window. I don’t know what else it could have been except for someone taking a picture.”
Pipe grabbed my arm and dragged me down the short hallway past the bathroom and straight into his bedroom. He reached into his dresser, pulled out a handgun, and tucked it in the back of his waistband. “Stay here. Don’t move. If you hear anyone coming down this hallway, call nine-one-one.”
Shit. “I don’t have my phone. I dropped it.”
Pipe pulled his from his pocket and
thrust it into my hand. “Here. You hear anything weird, call the police.”
I gripped his phone in my hand. “Where are you going? I think we should just call the police and let them handle this.”
“Not gonna discuss this. Stay here, I’ll holler when I’m coming so you know it’s me.” He disappeared from the room, glancing over his shoulder at me as he closed the door. “You’re fine, sugar.”
The door clicked shut behind him, and a whole new fear overtook my body. What if something happened to Pipe?
What if whatever wahoo who was outside had a gun too and managed to get a shot off before Pipe could? I sat down on the edge of his bed and stared at the door.
I checked the time on the phone and saw it had only been two minutes since I ran over to Pipe’s. Freakin’ hell.
I was on high alert listening for any noise, but the house was quiet.
Was that a good or bad sign?
Pipe’s phone vibrated in my hand, and my name flashed on the screen. At your place. You left the door open.
Shit, I had. Yeah. I was in a bit of a hurry.
Just making sure. I’m headed back.
I moved to the bedroom door but didn’t open it until I heard Pipe holler my name.
“Are you okay?” I called as I swung open the door and ran smack dab into Pipe.
He gripped my arms, steadying me. “I’m fine, sugar. You’re the one I’m worried about.” He handed me my phone. “Call back Alice. She called when I was putting the ice cream back in the freezer.”
I looked down at my phone and handed him back his. “Thank you,” I mumbled. I saw Alice had called six times and texted me more than ten.
“Oh, my God. Are you okay? I’m putting my shoes on, I’ll be right over.”
“What? No,” I sputtered. “I’m fine. Well, at least now I am. I’m over at Pipe’s.”
“Wait, what? The last I heard from you was ‘oh, my God,’ and now you’re over at Pipe’s? What did I miss?”
I looked up at Pipe who was studying me. “Uh, well, I saw someone outside my house, and I came over to Pipe’s because I was scared.”
Fallen Lords MC: Books 1-3 Page 29