by T. S. Joyce
“Oh. That’s good. How would you like me to kill him?”
“Nox! You can’t just kill everyone.”
False. He was really good at killing, but she was a lady and probably wouldn’t like that admission so he swallowed it down like a shot and kept rubbing her back in gentle circles because she wasn’t crying anymore. If this was all he had to do to stop the tears, he would literally rub her back until he had to take a leak and/or starved to death.
“He told me he is the only one willing to take me because I’m so submissive and not a good fox. He was taking a risk that our kits would have my genetics and be broken like me.”
So Nox was probably going to use a knife to disembowel him, or perhaps just run him over with his truck a few times…
“And then he told me no one in the den respects me as a functioning member, and that the sooner I said yes to his proposal, the better it would be for my reputation.”
Poison was also an option…
“And then he brought out this stack of papers. It was a contract to pair up, and I read the first two paragraphs and wanted to puke in the front seat of his fancy Lexus because he was trying to make me sign documents that would guarantee I would have at least four kits for him, one after the other, and I couldn’t say ‘no’ any time he wanted to have sex.”
Oh, so he wanted a slow death. Head on a spike maybe…
Easing back, she said, “Nox, I told him no. I don’t even know how I did that. I never fight anything, but you seem so sure of yourself and brave, and I wanted to be more like that, more like you, so threw the papers in the back of his car. I’m risking getting shunned, and it changes everything. I’ll be outside of the protection of the den. I’ll be a rogue. Me! I can’t even talk to people, and now I’m going to lose my entire support system.”
“Your support system sucks big hairy balls, just so you know.”
“Well, yeah, but it’s all I have.”
“You have me.”
“Until you leave.”
Nox exhaled a gusty breath that tapered into a growl. He didn’t like thinking about the leaving her part. Now it wasn’t just Vyr who could ruin her life. Darren would keep pushing her into a pairing, and the rest of the den, too. They would threaten and bully her until she got tired and gave in, and then she would actually have to sleep with that crusty old dingleberry. Nox’s growl grew louder, vibrating against his chest. Maybe he could kidnap her away to Damon’s Mountains and lock her in his trailer like the Princess and the Pea and feed her magical beans like Jack and the Beanstalk… And what the fuck was he thinking about? Those fairy didn’t make sense together, and if he fed her magical beans, they would grow to the sky... Beans were delicious. “Do you like beans?”
She didn’t even miss a beat. “I like refried beans in burritos and on chips.”
#perfectwoman. And she wasn’t even shrugging away from his hug, which definitely involved his boner pressed against her stomach. He was hung like a friggin’ horse so it wasn’t like she couldn’t feel it. She had to know he was ready from the way she was pressing closer against him. Plus, now her eyes were going all soft and drunk-looking, and she was running her hands down his chest and, holy fuck, it felt good when she touched him. Usually, the only touch he received was painful when he was fighting one of the other dominant males back home. That’s the only way he’d wanted touch before Nevada.
When she rested her palms against his chest, his body betrayed him completely and his nipples perked up, poking out against his Bone Ripper T-shirt.
Her hands felt so good. Sooo good. But there was this awful, gut-wrenching moment when he knew with certainty that he was going to fuck this up. He didn’t know how to do this. Not the sex part. That was easy—stick his dick in her hole, hump, spoog. But with Nevada, it felt like that wouldn’t be enough, and he had no idea what that meant. He’d never been this far with a girl, where he actually wanted to make her happy, and not just for now. Not just this moment. He was thinking about her happiness tomorrow, next week, and next year.
“I’m gonna screw this up,” he admitted.
Nevada swallowed hard and nodded as though she agreed. But just as a knife was twisting in his gut, she took him by the hand, pulled him inside, and whispered, “I’m gonna screw this up, too.”
And that was good enough for him.
Chapter Eight
Nox Fuller was hot as sin. Nevada would’ve never in a million years been brave enough to touch him like this—like she wanted—if he wasn’t so obviously into her. His hard shaft pressing against her stomach was a dead giveaway. She’d been telling the truth earlier. He was different from anyone she’d ever met. An outsider too, and she wasn’t as intimidated because he made her feel safe somehow. Which was insane because just an hour ago, she’d decided to risk being shunned from the den. This was simultaneously the scariest and most exciting moment of her existence.
Her life was going somewhere. Maybe straight to Hell, she didn’t know yet, but at least it was moving in a direction instead of standing still.
She led him straight through the living room and hallway and into her bedroom, smiling like a lunatic the whole way. She wasn’t even nervous, freaking out, or on the verge of a panic attack at the thought of being close to someone. She was excited instead.
“I live alone,” Nox said as she turned at the end of the bed and ran her hand down the hard mounds of his abs.
“Me, too.”
“No, I mean I have to live far away from everyone in Damon’s Mountains because I want to fight. Because I don’t understand people—”
“I don’t care about that. I understand it. You don’t belong, and I don’t belong.”
“Yeah, but I have this urge to make you belong.”
“What do you mean?”
Nox shocked her and cupped her cheeks gently with strong, calloused hands. “I want you to be okay and steady, and I don’t want to ruin you.”
“Nox, you can’t ruin me.”
“I ruin everything. On purpose. I like to. This is the first time I don’t want to ruin something, and I don’t know what to do.”
Oh, this man cared. He really did. He was admitting something hard. Nox the Runner was standing his ground and laying his insecurities in her hands.
“What do you want to do?” she asked.
He looked down at her with those piercing blue eyes, chest rising and falling too fast, his body humming with power as he searched her face. “I want to make you feel good,” he said in a low, growly voice.
“Holy moly, yes.”
“Say fuck,” he whispered, slipping his hands to her waist. He eased her toward the wall instead of the bed. “Say, fuck me, Nox.”
Her shoulders hit the sheetrock. “I don’t cuss.”
“Why?”
“Because…because…” Because Mom had told her it was unbecoming to say cuss words and she would need all the help she could get someday to land a man. It had been ingrained in her head not to say bad words so that maybe a boy would like her enough to keep her someday. And here was Nox, daring her to be bad and give him a filthy word. Here he was, daring her to live a little, change things up. And she liked change lately. At least with him, she did.
“Fuck me, Nox,” she said on a shaky, uncertain breath.
He smirked and lifted his chin, looked down his nose at her, his eyes blazing silver. “You made it sound like a question. Maybe we’ll play for a while, and then you’ll say it again when you mean it.”
Tease. Tease! She was ready. She just didn’t have confident speech. She parted her lips to argue with him and tell him he was being a brute, but he spun her around, grabbed her hands, and slammed them against the wall. He intertwined their fingers and nipped the back of her neck, then around to the base of her throat as he pressed his body against her back. Slowly, he bent down behind her and lifted the hem of her flowy dress, careful to brush his fingertips lightly along her outer leg as he dragged it up, up her body. And when he had the fabric all r
ucked up with one clenched fist midway up her stomach, he brushed those fingertips around her hip so softly she shook with chills that trembled up her spine. With anyone else, she would’ve been self-conscious when he got to her soft stomach, but right as the first tinges of embarrassment surged through her, Nox murmured a curse and told her, “You’re so beautiful,” in a snarly, sexy voice. Big, dominant bear shifter was drawing her fox up. Her inner animal was invisible most of the time, but right now, she was awake, present, watchful. She was ready for something Nevada didn’t understand.
There was a soft ripping sound, and then her tattered lacy panties were falling to the ground.
Nox flattened his strong hand against her stomach and then slipped his fingertips down, down, down between her legs. When his fingers touched her wet sex, she let off a moan and arched her back so that her butt pressed harder against his erection.
Nox pushed into her deep, like he couldn’t help himself, and the snarl in his throat vibrated through his chest and against her back. His beard tickled her shoulder as he dragged soft, biting kisses from her earlobe down the side of her neck. He was playing with her now, teasing her clit with the tip of his finger, then dipping it shallowly inside of her, up to one knuckle, then back to her clit again. Oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh. She wasn’t going to last long just from this. She rocked her hips into his touch the next time he pushed his finger inside of her, chasing him, pleading silently.
Another soft growl, and Nox released the fabric of her dress and pulled her hair gently, urging her to bow her back for him, or maybe it was a delicious punishment for pushing his pace. If so, she wanted to misbehave again.
Nevada slid her right fingertips down the wall and then cupped his hand between her legs. In, in, in, she wanted him inside of her.
“Good,” he murmured, plucking her earlobe gently with his lips. “Show me what you like. And then I’ll show you what I like.”
Okay then, hell yes then! Rocking against his hand, she put pressure on his knuckles, and he slid two fingers deep inside of her. God, she just about buckled right there against the wall. Her locked arm wasn’t going to support her, so she went to her elbow. Rolling her hips against his hand, she urged him inside again.
“Fuck, you’re so ready for me,” Nox murmured against her ear as he pushed into her again. “Do you know how hard it is to keep from burying myself in you right now? I want to fuck you so hard and so fast you’ll know exactly who you belong to.”
His words and his touch were building a fire in her middle, and when she rolled her hips against his hand faster, he allowed it. She was panting in tiny bursts now, moaning each time he hit her clit just right. This was everything and not enough all at once. And when Nox sucked hard on her neck, hard enough to make a hickey, hard enough to bruise, hard enough to mark her for a day, she lost it. “Nox, Nox,” she said mindlessly, begging for more, but unable to put her needs into words.
He pulled her into him tightly, his hard dick pressing against the fabric of their clothes, right against her ass. His fingers were driving deep inside her now, and even though she wanted more of him, she couldn’t stop either. Didn’t want to. This pressure he was building felt too good, and she was already on the edge of— “Oh! I’m coming, I’m coming.” Mindless. She was mindless and boneless, and Nox was holding her up, controlling her body with touch in a way no man ever had.
“Say it,” he growled in an inhuman voice.
Her voice steady, and confident, she said, “Fuck me, Nox,” just as her orgasm shattered her.
He now was bucking against her back in the same rhythm as he was fingering her, and she was right in the throes of a desperate need that eclipsed anything she’d ever felt before.
“Good,” he practically purred against her ear. And then in a wicked tone, he rumbled, “Now it’s my turn.”
Ecstasy and anticipation swirled inside of her as the jingle of his belt sounded. Yes, yes, to this, she wanted him so badly. With his boot, he kicked her ankles wider, gripped her hip with one hand and shoved the skirts of her dress up her back with the other, and then he pushed the tip of his cock into her by an inch. Big. Nox was just as big as she imagined, but he’d prepared her and she was ready. The next time he slid into her halfway, stretching her, and pulled out slowly as her orgasm pulsed on. The third time? He slammed into her so deep she gasped at the shock of it. Perfect, perfect, this was so perfect. It’s like they were made to fit.
Nox bucked into her faster and faster, and when he clamped his teeth on her neck and cupped her sex, her climax began to build again. Again? What was this man doing to her body? She’d barely finished the first one and now with every hard thrust, she was getting closer to the edge of release again. So big, and she was so tight. So good. God, so good. “Harder,” she begged as he bit down.
He was so powerful behind her, his abs flexing against her back with every stroke. And right as his snarl turned feral, he grabbed one breast and pulled her against her as he slammed into her deep. His dick throbbed inside of her, and now she was gone too, matching his release. She cried out. And then there were teeth on her skin. Teeth and what should’ve been awful pain at her neck, but all she could focus on was the pleasure he was giving her. His shaft pulsed on with each stroke until warmth trickled down her legs. But warmth was trickling down her neck too, and for a moment she was confused with the strange sensations overtaking her body. Consuming pleasure and a dull ache and warmth rained down her skin. She smelled blood. The scent of iron tainted the air. He’d bitten her. Hard. Hard enough to make her bleed. But why?
Nox slowed his thrusting, smoothed it out until both of their releases were done and they were twitching with sensitivity.
“You aren’t healing,” Nox rasped out.
“Foxes don’t heal as fast as other shifters,” she whispered, too intimidated to turn around and face him.
He gripped her shoulders and spun her slowly, then pinned her against the wall. He cupped her neck on both sides and searched her face with those feral silver eyes of his, his blond brows drawn down in confusion. “I would say I’m sorry for what I did, but I’m not. I’m not sorry for anything.”
“What do you mean? What did you do?” she asked, flinching at a strange pain in her chest.
“I…” His eyes narrowed and his frown deepened. “You know.”
“Nooo,” she drew out, unease constricting her chest. “What are you talking about? Why did you bite me? Is it some kind of instinct with your bear? Is that something you need to do during sex?”
“Not anymore,” he rushed out. “I should go.” He knelt and smoothed out her dress until the skirt hung perfectly again. And never once did he look up and meet her eyes.
“Nox?”
“I need to leave, and everything will be okay. It’ll be okay, Nevada. I pinky promise.” He hooked a pinky around hers and shook it hard once, then did an about face and strode from the room without looking back. He adjusted his pants as he went.
“You’re really leaving?” She followed him out to the living room. He was walking fast, and she had to jog to keep up. “I-I don’t understand. Did I do something wrong?”
“Don’t.” Nox yanked open the front door to her apartment. “You’re a goddess and I don’t deserve you and now I’ve ruined you, just like I said I would. Never let monsters into your house, Nevada. First rule of survival.”
Nox climbed in his truck, and the engine roared to life. His high beams lit up the parking lot, and then he was burning rubber to get out of there. Away from her.
She pressed her hand to the aching bite on her neck and shook her head in utter bafflement. She’d been mistaken. His feelings for her hadn’t grown and he wasn’t dependable. He was still a leaver and runner.
And now she was without a prospect, soon to be shunned from the den, would be marked and forced out of this territory, and she would probably bear the scar of a bite from a man she’d risked too much for, too soon.
He’d said “first rule of survival,”
as if he knew what it was like for her, or for her people. The first rule of survival was invisibility for fox shifters.
And what had she done?
She’d let Nox see her—really see her—instead of listening to her instincts to hide.
And now she would bear the scar of that bad decision for the rest of her life.
Chapter Nine
Now that he knew what to look for, this place was crawling with shifters. Apparently dens of foxes were huge. Paranoid little non-apex predator shifters knew their place on the food chain and banded together in big numbers in case anyone tried to make waves with them.
His phone rang again for the third time in a row, and Nox glared at the caller ID. Fuckface BlueBalls Dragon. With a growl, he scanned the grocery store parking lot for Nevada’s car and parked his truck to wait, just in case she decided on a late-night shopping spree again tonight. It wasn’t safe for her until those two creeper tourists moved on through. He’d been watching them, aka stalking them, to see if they needed to be a little deader than he’d left them when they’d messed with Nevada a few days ago. They were apparently here for some big golf tournament at the Foxburg Golf Course, and until it was over and they were far away from here, Nox was going to troll the local grocery store in case his mate needed back up.
Mother fucker! Stop calling her that!
Nox slammed his hand on the steering wheel, pissed at himself. Not because he’d bitten her. Fuck guilt. But because it was torture trying to stay away from her. Two days since he’d left her house with that question on her lips. Did I do something wrong?
She was perfect. Classy, beautiful, funny, and easy-going except when she was around people, but he didn’t care about that. He didn’t like being around people either. She was the type of girl a guy like him dreamed about. That real love, mate-for-life kind of encounter that made him draw up and question everything. His destiny was to be alone, right? He’d been born with too much of Clinton Fuller in him, and he was meant to wander the earth alone, fighting dominants to stay steady, bounty hunting because it was solo work, and wrinkling up year after year until he turned to dust deep in Damon’s Mountains. No legacy, no family, no mate, just getting through each day wondering why the fuck he couldn’t just be normal like everyone else.