“I was married once,” Sean said. “A long time ago. I…I also had a child. A daughter. Her name was Isabelle. We lived in a village in the most northern part of the Highlands. We were farmers. I had preferred the life. It was quiet. Tame. No stress or worries past the harvest. We were allies with a clan called the Jones’. Have ye heard of them?”
Rose nodded. “Aye!” she said enthusiastically. “That was my clan! My father’s clan!”
Sean laughed. “Ye must be joking.”
Rose shook her head. “Not in the slightest. We must have traded with yer people on more than one occasion.”
“How peculiar…Anyway…I was very much happy with my life, with my wife and my child. We never encountered any problems, any resistance, any quarrels with the English. It was a tranquil existence, and I woke up every morning with nothing more than the tasks I had in front of me and the love of my wife and child to support me…”
Rose’s heart beat faster as she sensed the dire turn in the story approaching, Sean’s tone reflective of pain and sorrow and loss the more he told the story. “What happened to them?” she asked.
Sean hung his head, closing his eyes and squeezing them tight. “They…perished in a fire. My entire village was burned down to the ground. I had returned after an afternoon hunt to find it ablaze. I had been gone for several hours. I could see the smoke in the distance as I was making my return.” A single tear slid down his cheek. “I could not save them. The fire had spread to far by the time I had made my return.”
Rose felt her heart sink into her stomach, feeling Sean’s pain as she saw the fire in her mind, roaring and spreading like a disease and consuming all that Sean once knew and love. “How did it happen?” she asked.
“There was a sole survivor,” Sean said. “A friend of mine. He said that the English set it ablaze after we refused to trade with them. What is most peculiar is that no one knew of our whereabouts, save for several local Highlander clans. I am convinced, as is he, that the English were led there, perhaps under duress or monetary gain, by one of these Highlander clans. My friend stated that there was a man there with the English, a Highlander. He never learned his name. All he saw was a face.”
Rose squinted. “What did this man look like?”
“My friend said that he had a flowing beard, and two different colored eyes—one green and one brown.”
Rose began to tremble, her lip quivering as she brought a hand to her mouth. To Sean, it appeared that she was taken aback by the story, but the reality was that the description of the Highlander that had led the English to Sean’s village was one that she knew well, one that was seared into her brain and now brought back with a vibrant vengeance.
God in heaven, she thought. This cannot be. It cannot be! He would never have done such a thing. Sean must be mistaken! Oh, God, please tell me it is not true. Please tell me that he is wrong in his recollection.
“What is it, Rose?” Sean said. “Ye looked troubled.”
Rose slowed her horse to a stop. I have to tell him. Even if he is wrong, I have to tell him. “Ye are sure,” she said to Sean, “that the man who led the English to yer village had two different colored eyes.”
Sean nodded. “Aye. I am. My friend in the village was more than certain. Why do ye ask, my love?”
Rose hung her head, a hand still covering her mouth. “The man ye describe,” she said, “might be that of a man that…of a man that I know quite well.”
Sean was on the edge of his saddle, his eyes wide and face taking on a shocked expression. “Who, Rose?” he said with urgency. “Who is it that ye speak of?”
Rose looked up, a guilt and weary look upon her as she said: “The man ye speak of, the man ye describe goes by the name of Thomas MacGillis. He is…he is my father, Sean.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Sean felt his stomach drop out, sliding off of his saddle and gripping the reins tight. His world began to spin, his horse neighing and crying out as it was pulled toward the ground. No, no, no, Sean’s mind screamed. This can’t be true. This can’t be true!
Sean fell from his saddle, landing on the ground as his head made contact with the earth. The last thing he heard before his world went completely black was Rose’s voice calling out to him, shouting his name and a flash of her arm reaching out to try and steady him from failing, though the attempt was done completely in vain.
Sean, after having passed out, immediately found himself submerged back in the same nightmare he always had. It was the same world, a world drenched in fire, his family’s screams calling out to him as a blast of heat consumed his face and feelings of utter dread and sorrow overcame him.
Sean saw the inferno in front of him, running toward it and reaching out his hand, but feeling himself being pulled further away the closer he came. His legs felt like they were made of lead, unable to carry him any further as the fire grew brighter and hotter. But though the dream was the same as it always was—this time there was a significant difference in the cast that was a part of the horrid landscape and scenery.
A man entered as Sean fell to his knees, brawny and towering and staring on at the fire as if he were satisfied at the fact that it was burning with such a vibrant ferocity. Sean stared on at the man as he looked upon the fire, his hands on his hips and nodding with satisfaction. The man turned, his face glowing in the fire with two colors—one blue, one green—looking upon his face with a lecherous grin to accompany it. It was him, the traitor, the man that Sean was certain had been the one responsible for the demise of his family. It was Rose’s father, a fact he would have never before thought as a possibility.
Moments later, the man with the different colored eyes gestured and looked to his left, beckoning for someone to join him at his side. A woman then walked in, a woman he knew quite well, her hair and her features seemingly on fire as she stood next to the man and turned to level her gaze at Sean. She held her head high, a single tear streaming down her cheek—it was Rose, a sorrowful expression on her face as she held the man’s hand and said: “I’m so sorry, Sean,” before a torch appeared in her hand and she tossed it into the fire ahead of her.
The fire then exploded like the destruction of a thousand suns, Sean blinded by the light as he screamed in protest. The fire then rages outward, consuming Sean entirely and turning everything around him into an overbearing shade of white.
“Sean!” he heard his wife scream. “No! No! No! No! No!”
Sean then felt his eyes open. He saw the evening sky painted a pleasant hue of pink above him. His body was dripping with perspiration, his head throbbing but skin feeling pleasantly cooled by the early evening wind that blew through. He was panting, his chest rising and falling with labored breathing. It was only a dream, he pondered. It was only a dream…
“Sean,” Rose’s voice said softly. “Sean, my God, are ye alright?”
Sean slowly turned his head to the left and saw Rose and Kelly by his side. Looks of concern had completely consumed their expressions, their hands on Sean and horses corralled together in a huddle behind them.
“Don’t move,” Kelly said. “Ye hit yer head quite hard.”
Sean winced, feeling the stabbing pain inside his head only increasing in intensity. “How long was I out?” he asked, looking above and seeing the sky slowing turning to shades of black.
“About thirty minutes,” Rose replied. “We were worried the worst had happened when you fell. Ye should rest. Ye are quite pale.”
Sean shook his head, sitting up slowly despite Rose and Kelly attempting to press him onto his back.
“No, no,” Kelly protested. “Ye need to sit back.”
“Please,” Rose interjected. “Ye are hurt.”
Sean gently batted their hands away, rising to his feet and squinting his eyes as he wobbled until he became steady. Feelings of utter dread consumed him, his world feeling like it was once again coming to an end just like the day it did when his entire family had perished in the fire.
“Sea
n,” Kelly said. “Are ye okay?”
Sean huffed. He couldn’t help but laugh. What a silly question, he thought. Of course, I’m not. This is horrible, absolutely despicable, a fate crueler than God could have ever conjured. No, this is a situation concocted in the depths of hell. A cruel joke that is serving as some kind of punishment for all the things that I have done.
“Sean,” Rose said. “Talk to us…”
Sean turned, flashes of the man with the different colored eyes flooding his brain. He could help but scowl, a lethal glimmer in his eye that he leveled directly at Rose. He drew a breath, trying to calm himself but finding that it was to no avail. “It was yer father,” he said, a hiss in his tone. “Yer father is responsible for the death of my family?”
Kelly turned to Rose, a shocked expression on her face. “What he is he talking about?”
Rose held up her hands in submission. Sean could see she felt guilty. He knew deep down that she was not responsible. But seeing her stand there, knowing that she was the blood of the man responsible for the demise of his family, did nothing short of boil his blood.
“Sean,” Rose said. “Can we talk about this once we’ve reached our destination?”
Sean shook his head. “No. We cannot. I will not wait to discuss this ghastly situation.”
Kelly huffed, clearly growing impatient with the whole ordeal. “Will someone tell me what is going on?” she pleaded.
Sean had grown tired of Rose’s stalling. “Yer leader here is the daughter of a man who allowed the English to burn down my village. She hails from a family, from a monster, who allowed my family to be destroyed.”
Kelly looked at Rose with a wide set of eyes, confusion coating them and holding a hand to her stomach. “Is this true?” she asked.
“It’s complicated,” Rose said.
Sean clenched his fist. “But it’s not.”
Rose took a step forward. “Sean, I had no idea. If I had—”
“It doesn’t matter. This is…unfathomable…”
Sean walked away, moving toward his right and descending a hill that spilled into the wooded area. He felt his feet moving without him making the conscious decision to do so, needing a moment to himself and allow his nerves to settle and his anger to be curbed.
Damn you, God, his mind scrambled. How could ye do this to me? Why would ye do this to me? I am undeserving of this. I did not do anything to warrant such a vile and wretched punishment. Ye allow me to start following for a woman whose father is responsible for the death of those I loved? What kind of world is this? Why would you put someone through such torment?!
Sean came into a clearing, feel his knees once again going weak and causing him to come to a stop. He sat down, crossing his legs and holding his head in his hands. He felt the aching in his skull beginning to subside, replaced now with a detrimental sadness that tugged at his heart and made his eyes begin to well. He didn’t know where to start in regard to sorting the whole matter out. He felt at a loss, completely unable to focus or find any shred of absolution with the whole situation. It was as if old wounds from the past had been reopened, all the healing that he may have once done now negated and setting him back so many years and making him feel right back in the position he was when his family first perished.
He heard crunching of leaves behind him. He knew it was Rose, approaching with slow and cautious steps. He made it a point to close his eyes. He couldn’t bear to bring himself to look upon her face.
Rose came up to Sean but made it a point to give herself a few feet of distance. She waited for a few moments, nothing but the wind rustling the trees audible during that time.
“Sean,” Rose said. “We should talk about this.”
Sean threw up his hands. “What is there to talk about?”
“Everything. All of it. I…I don’t even know where to begin.”
Sean started to stand. “There’s nothing left to be said. This is…”
“Awful.”
He nodded. “Aye. Quite so.”
Rose took a step forward. “Then how do we rectify this? How do we make this right?”
Sean paced. How? I don’t think we can. I can never get over this. It is not you who is responsible, but I can never forgive this situation…
“I don’t know, Rose,” he said somberly. “I don’t know if we can fix this.”
“But it was not my fault.”
“I’m aware.”
“I could have not told ye. That would have made things significantly worse.”
“We cannot focus on hypotheticals, Rose. The fact is…” He hung his head. “The fact is that I cannot look upon yer face without seeing my family. I cannot speak to ye without thinking of yer father, without thinking of the fact that…”
Sean waved off the last of the statement and stepped away.
“Say it,” Rose said. “Say what ye are thinking.”
Sean took his time to answer. He knew he was going to say what he was thinking. It was just such a terrible sentiment to relay to Rose, but it was one that he knew was true and had to be spoken, nonetheless.
He turned, facing Rose and holding his head high. “For years,” he said, “I have sought after the man that killed my family. I’ve looked for all the responsible parties for some time but to no avail. That has been my plight. That has been the sole reason as to why I’ve done the things that I have and lived the life that I have led.” He took a step forward. “I want revenge, Rose. I want to exact vengeance on those who have wronged me. For so long, with each day that has passed, I have felt those results slip further and further away from my grasp…but now, here and now, I have heard of who is responsible. I know now that it was yer father who led those English bastards to my village and allowed my entire family to be destroyed.”
Rose’s mouth opened, sadness coating her expression as she held up her hands pleadingly. “Sean,” she said. “My father had his reasons—”
“I could give a damn what they are,” Sean scowled. “He is the responsible party. He is the one that made me the man I am today. I care about ye, Rose. I do. But I cannot let this pass. Ye must tell me. Ye must tell me where he is, so that he can answer for the crimes he has committed against me.”
Rose’s eyes watered. Her lip quivered. Her body started to tremble.
“Where is he?” Sean persisted. “Tell me. Ye have to.”
She hung her head, shaking it back and forth. “He is…dead, Sean. I told ye that. He died a long time ago.”
Sean’s heart sank. He felt all of his motivations, his entire reason for living now casted by the wayside. No, no, no…it can’t be…he can’t be dead. He must answer for what he’s done. He must!
“Tell me that is not true,” Sean said, holding his head in his hands. “Tell me that is not so.”
“He’s gone, Sean. He has been gone for quite some time. Believe me, if I had known, if I had the slightest inkling that he had done what he did, I would have made him answer for it.”
Sean wanted to weep. He felt completely at a loss. The man responsible, the person for placing the stone cold pain inside of his heart would never be held accountable for his actions—and it instilled a sadness in Sean that he just could not bring himself to bear.
“I am so sorry, Sean,” Rose said. “Ye have to believe me.”
Sean waited for a long moment—and then he nodded. “I do not blame ye, Rose. I know that it is not yer fault.”
She stepped toward him, reaching her hand out timidly and cradling his palm. “Let us make this right. I know that is much to ask. But we can come back from this. We can proceed forward. We can live a bright future, one free of all of this turmoil. Please, Sean. Continue to ride with us. Continue to help us seek salvation. Together.”
Sean drew a deep breath. “Not a day will pass,” he said, “that I will not think of this matter when I look upon yer face. As I said: I care for ye…but I cannot do this any longer. I cannot be around and hear yer voice or be in yer presence without thinking abou
t those I loved. This is fate, Rose. This is how it must be.”
Rose shook her head defiantly. “What are ye saying, Sean?”
Sean pulled his hand away from Rose’s grip. “I am leaving, Rose. I have to go. Ye will have to ride the rest of the journey on yer own. That is the only way it must be.” He jutted his chin to the south. “Yer destination rest three more miles away. Ye will find a road that curves up high into the mountains. Take it. From there, ye will find yer new home. I’m sorry. I am. But I have to go.”
Sean walked away, Rose following after him as he hustled out of the forest and mounted his horse.
“Please, Sean!” Rose protested as he started to ride. “Please, don’t go!”
Casting one last look over his shoulder, Sean nodded his head, sighed, and said to Rose: “Goodbye,” before riding off in a hot hustle away from her and Kelly.
Legend of a Highland Lass: Scottish Medieval Highlander Romance Page 21