by Leigh Fallon
“Sorry I took so long, Meg. I couldn’t find it anywhere,” Caitlin called breathlessly as she jogged toward me. She pulled up short when she saw my face.
“What’s wrong?”
I didn’t know what to say. The beauty of the moths had sent a chill through my entire body and left my skin tingling. It was the oddest sensation, sort of like what had been happening with my hands, but somehow gentler.
Áine stepped out from under the canopy and walked toward me.
“It’s Megan, isn’t it? I’m Áine. We have art together, but we haven’t been introduced yet,” she announced, looking at me warily. She stopped short, keeping her distance from me.
“Yeah, hi,” I said, taking a step closer and attempting to shake her hand.
Ignoring it, she scratched her neck and cocked her head to one side, focusing on something behind me. Her eyes slowly slid back to mine and she looked at me thoughtfully for a few moments. Her eyes were so like her brother’s that it was unsettling.
Then a battered-looking Land Rover Discovery pulled in behind her. I peered into the car, but couldn’t see through the tinted windows in the half-light. The driver’s window opened just a little bit and a gruff voice called to Áine to get into the car.
“Must dash.” She looked at me guiltily and jumped into the front seat. Before they pulled away she rolled down her window and stuck her open palm out of the car. On it was a big white moth that must have strayed inside. She smiled at me and gently blew the moth off her hand, then raised her finger to her lips. Seconds later, the car took off, leaving dust and spinning stones in its wake.
“That was weird,” Caitlin said.
“Totally,” I agreed. “Come on, let’s get home.”
The last of the sun was setting over the Bandon estuary as we walked along the river. It had turned the still water a molten orange and red.
Caitlin looked at me. “What’s with all the silence? Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. It’s just … I saw Áine doing something really weird with all these white moths. It’s hard to describe. She sort of had them dancing.”
“She was dancing with the moths?”
“No, she made the moths dance.”
“I don’t get it.” Caitlin snorted, giving me a sidelong glance.
“I’m not explaining it well. I just … Do you think there’s any truth in the rumors about their being … you know?”
“Stop it! You’re giving me the creeps.”
We made our way up the hill past the school and then turned toward town. Just ahead of us I saw someone who looked like the old man from the other day. I started to slow down, not wanting to have to deal with him again. He turned his expressionless face to us before slowly crossing the road and disappearing into an alley.
Caitlin glanced back at me. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“What is it with the creepy monk guys around here?”
“Oh, they’re just the brothers from the friary. They’re all really nice.”
“What about that one, the one with the long gray hair and beard clip?”
“Can’t say I’ve ever seen a monk with a beard clip,” Caitlin said, laughing. “I think you have an overactive imagination. I’m going to have a word with the lads. No more scary stories for you.”
“He was just walking in front of us.” I pointed to where he’d crossed the road.
“Sorry, I must have missed him. My mind was more agreeably engaged.” She winked at me. “Thanks for today; I know it wasn’t exactly your bag of chips.”
Still really freaked out, but not wanting to make her worry, I smiled. “Today was great. Your idea was inspired. Riding in the evenings could be just what I need.” I hugged her. “See you tomorrow.”
“Yes,” she replied, “but I’ll talk to you first.” She waved her phone at me.
“Definitely,” I said, waving mine back at her.
I started huffing and puffing my way up the hill. When I was halfway home, I leaned against a tree to catch my breath. There was a squawk from the branch above my head. I jumped and looked up into the silver-ringed eye of a familiar crow.
“And what are you looking at?” I said to him. I took another deep breath and battled the last of the steep hill to my house.
“Hi, Dad! Wait until I tell you what I saw,” I shouted as I let myself in. “Dad?” There was nothing.
I went into the kitchen and flicked on the lights just as my phone beeped with a new text.
Having dinner at work. Order pizza. See you later.
“Oh, Dad.” I sighed. “Of all the nights for you not to be here.”
My stomach was still in knots, so I decided to skip the pizza. I picked up the remote and turned on the TV for some much-needed background noise.
The sound of a cracking branch drew my attention to the window. There, in the tree just outside, was the same weird crow. His beady eyes glared at me in the half-light of dusk.
“Yah!” I shouted at the window, but the bird simply jumped to another branch. With the hairs standing up on the back of my neck, I hastily pulled the curtains.
Four
SAILING LESSONS
I couldn’t believe a month had passed since we moved to Kinsale. Time had flown by, and I had settled into a comfortable routine: Monday to Friday I did the whole school thing, and then on the weekends I hung out with Caitlin and Jennifer, either at one of our houses or in one of the coffee shops in town.
I hadn’t ventured into Cork City yet, though there was a trip planned for a week from Saturday. Caitlin had even been given a pass on her usual cleaning duties in the B and B. I was really looking forward to it. As much as I liked Kinsale, it was hardly Rodeo Drive, and I was desperate for new clothes. My pursuit of Adam might be futile, but I needed to look good anyway. Making myself a tad more visible couldn’t hurt either.
It was funny: When I first arrived here Adam seemed to be everywhere. True, besides the odd looks and furtive glances, he generally ignored me, but he was a regular presence. Lately, though, Adam had been keeping a lower profile. He was in school, but I was seeing him less and less.
I had even asked my dad about him. He said Adam was still working at the yacht club, and sailing and instructing more than ever. Strangely, Rían, who’d graduated last year, still skulked around the place. It was creepy. What on earth was he doing lurking around the school anyway? Shouldn’t he have been in college or something?
And while Adam had been pulling a disappearing act, Áine had become more approachable since our meeting at the equestrian center. But though she was always nice and friendly, she never got too close. One day in art, I plucked up the courage to ask her about the moths.
“Áine…” I chickened out at the last minute. “Could you pass me a red oil pastel?”
“Sure,” she replied, handing it to me. I noticed she avoided touching my hand, though. Weird.
I swallowed hard and tried again. “Do you mind if I ask you something?”
She looked at me, half-wary, half-surprised. “Sure.”
“What happened with the moths that night at the equestrian center?”
“I don’t understand what you mean,” she said quietly, and turned back to her drawing.
“They were all around you, dancing. I saw them covering you.”
She laughed, not making eye contact. “That’s a good one.”
“But I saw—”
“I don’t know what you saw, Megan, but whatever it was, it had nothing to do with me.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. I just…” I felt my face redden. She must think I’m deranged.
She looked at me with pity. “Don’t beat yourself up over it. The light can play tricks at dusk.” She tapped her hand on mine in a reassuring way.
We both jumped. The zing that passed through us was short, but strong. It was like a static shock, and the tingling that had been flickering through my arm before was gone. I looked at her now pale face.
“Was that static?” I asked, lookin
g from her hand to mine.
“Yeah, ouch. I gotta go… I’m not feeling too well.” She turned to the teacher. “Miss, I feel sick. Can I be excused?”
“Of course, Áine,” she replied, and Áine fled the room.
She hadn’t sat next to me in art since then, but Caitlin told me not to worry about it, that Áine was, after all, a DeRís, and oddness was to be expected.
My Adam drought came to an abrupt end the first day of our sailing course. While most students were excited that they would be getting out of gym for five weeks, I was dreading it. Boats, water—ugh! The only thing keeping me from dropping out of the whole charade was the thought of seeing Adam, being close to him.
When school broke for lunch, people who were signed up for the sailing course were allowed to go home to get their gear. Once home, I changed, grabbed the bag containing my new wet suit (yeah, attractive! But a must with the freezing Irish waters), and set off to the marina. Now that I was so close to seeing Adam, my body was fizzing with excitement. I took a deep breath and tried to calm my nerves, but it didn’t really work.
Caitlin and Jennifer were waiting for me at the club.
“Hurry, Meg. Dump your bag,” Caitlin said, pointing at the clubhouse.
Jennifer looked at her nails, oozing a lack of interest. “Yeah, Meg, come on; let’s get this over with.” She flicked her blond hair over her shoulder. The appeal of the hair flick was lost with the very unflattering gray-and-pink wet suit. I suppressed a smile.
“I’ll be right there,” I called, running up the steps. I glanced back at them and ran slap into Adam’s hard chest at the door. Winded by the collision and teetering on the edge of the step, I grasped in vain at the handrail. He put out his arms behind me and caught me before I fell, pressing me against his solid body. He looked down at me with an inquisitive glance, and I tilted my head toward his face, then jumped back from him, realizing I had paused a second too long, giving away far too much. Get out of here quick, I thought to myself, and ran for the locker room. I poured myself into the wet suit, then dashed back down to Caitlin and Jennifer. They were chatting in excited voices with Darren and Killian. Nausea washed over me. I wasn’t sure whether it was the impending sailing or my run-in with Adam, but I could feel the bile stir in my stomach.
Caitlin and I paired up and we were assigned a tiny two-person boat. We were instructed to drag the boats, which were on little wheels, down the slipway and into the water.
I can’t believe I signed up for this. What was I thinking? We started walking down the concrete slipway. The water lapped up at us halfway down. Green slime and seaweed swirled around my feet. My stomach churned uneasily. I needed to get out of here. I was looking around for a private place to puke when Killian came up to me and put his hand under my elbow.
“Jeez, Megan, you okay? You look like you’re about to hurl.”
Caitlin turned from the front of the boat at the sound of Killian’s voice. “You do look awful. Do you need to sit this out?”
Killian put his arm around me. “Come on; I’ll help you back up to the club.”
At that moment Adam walked down among us all and stopped at the end of the slipway. I shook my head back and forth; I had to snap out of it.
“No, Killian, thanks. I’ll be fine.” I felt myself cool almost instantly. Then the prickling started working its way through my body. The sensation no longer startled me. In fact, I found it soothing today. I could feel my stomach settling and my color returning to normal.
“Only if you’re sure,” Killian said in a worried tone.
“Honestly, I’m fine. Caitlin, tell him I’m fine.”
“Thanks, Killian, but it looks like your knight-in-shining-armor skills won’t be needed,” Caitlin said, glancing at Adam.
“Well, if I can be of any help, just give me a call.” He smirked and winked at her.
Adam had made his way to his boat in the front and was running though some notes. He looked so vital, so full of life. The rest of us looked hideous in our wet suits and life vests, but he still looked gorgeous. How did he do that?
He flicked his eyes around at us and started giving a lecture on water safety and dos and don’ts while operating leisure craft, his green eyes holding everyone’s attention. I idly rubbed my tingling neck and tried to listen to his instructions, but it was useless. I felt my body melting toward him, my breath catching. I dropped my eyes and tried to refocus. I quickly risked a look back up to him under my eyelashes, but his eyes caught mine at the same time and he immediately looked away, dropping his clipboard in the process. Caitlin elbowed me in the ribs.
“Focus, Meg,” she whispered under her breath.
We cast off into the water somewhat successfully; it was actually quite fun, as long as I didn’t look into the deep, dark liquid swirling around us. It was reassuring to see that Adam treated everyone else with the same level of reserve as he did me. He called us in two boats at a time to do some work on knots and lines. He was giving a complicated demonstration on the importance of tying up pulleys or something; I wasn’t really listening. I assumed Caitlin was—well, at least I hoped she was. But when I looked over at her, she was gazing at Killian, who was concentrating hard on his ropes and mimicking Adam. Panic hit me. Oh, crap! I tried frantically to catch up with what Adam was saying and doing, but it was too late.
“Go out twenty yards and keep plenty of room from each other, and, working as a team, tie in your lines and secure your sails,” Adam shouted as he moved on to the next pair of boats.
I glanced at Caitlin. She was still looking dreamily over toward Killian’s dinghy.
I kicked her. “Cait, did you get any of that?”
“Huh?” she said, with a vacant expression.
I flushed with embarrassment. God, could we be any more pathetic?
“Don’t worry, Meg. It looks pretty simple. I’m sure I can figure this out,” Caitlin said, as she started pulling at ropes and levers.
I looked back at Adam, who was giving a helping hand to one of the other pairs. He was so gorgeous; his lightly tanned skin rippled over his toned body. His dazzling eyes were hidden for the moment behind a pair of dark sunglasses. His defined cheekbones were flushed red from the sea air. His full, curling lips were slightly parted; I wondered what they would feel like, taste like…
Bam! I was interrupted by a hard thump on my head.
The shock of the cold water was temporary. It was replaced by fear as I gasped for air. Whatever hit me had snapped all of the oxygen from my lungs before dunking me in the sea. I sucked in a vast breath and choked on the salt water that swirled its way into my body. I couldn’t figure out which way was up. I knew I was wearing a life jacket, but I couldn’t find the surface; there was no air. Then I got warmer, my breathing became easier, and the strangest sensation of calm came over me. I was underwater, but no longer felt the panic of water filling my lungs. My head was spinning and pounding with pain, but I was breathing. The sound was muffled, like I was cocooned.
A firm arm supported my back.
“Megan.” I heard my name being called in the distance. “Christ, Megan, answer me! Megan, come on; can you hear me?”
I wanted to open my eyes, but even the slightest movement hurt my head.
“Oh, Megan, Megan, I’m so sorry,” I heard Caitlin crying in the background.
“Caitlin, please stay back,” the voice instructed. “Come on, Megan, open your eyes.” It was Adam’s voice, calling me back to consciousness.
I obeyed him and opened my eyes, trying to focus on his. I was lying in Adam’s arms on the slipway. His face was so close to mine I could hear his ragged breath and taste the warmth of it.
“There you are.” He smiled in relief.
The sun was shining behind him and I couldn’t see his face clearly. I tried to sit up and coughed, attempting to clear the burning stinging in my throat. I became acutely aware of a throbbing sensation in my head; it spun and little stars twinkled around Adam’s face.
/> I gasped at the pain and put my hand to the back of my head. It felt warm and sticky. When I looked at my hand, it was all bloody. I tried to get to my feet, but fell forward. Adam’s strong, warm arms caught me.
“Whoa, take it slowly.”
He put my arm around his shoulders and his arm around my back to support me. I gasped at the warmth and closeness of his body; it was like a static shock. Misinterpreting my gasp as pain, he swung me up into his arms.
An orange lifeboat pulled alongside the slipway. “Hi, Adam, you need help? We were just coming in from a call and noticed all the commotion,” a crew member shouted up.
“We’re all good here now, thanks, Dave. Actually, can you do me a favor and see that the class gets the dinghies back into the yard, while I look after this one?”
“Sure thing,” Dave replied.
As Caitlin walked past me up the slipway she gave me a tearful smile. “Are you sure you’re going to be okay? I’m so sorry; I let go of the rope that controls the boom and it just shot out.”
“Don’t worry; I’m good.”
“Go on, Caitlin; join the rest of the class,” Adam said.
It was quiet and calm for a moment, and then I remembered I was in Adam’s arms. I was sure I weighed a ton, but I felt faint and my head pounded. I let it fall against his chest. I could hear his heart thudding away. I was so comfortable there; I felt so safe. My eyes were fluttering again, and the last thing I saw before losing the battle with them was the gray monk, standing at the gates to the yacht club. His watery, expressionless eyes met mine; then a hint of a smile touched his lips.
My head was throbbing. I opened my eyes and reached for the back of my head, only to encounter a hand and an ice pack. Startled, I sat up.
“Dad!”
My dad’s worried face softened into a smile. “God, Meg, you gave me a fright! How do you feel?”
“Sore. Where am I?”
“The Kinsale clinic. I wanted to take you to the hospital.” I stiffened. I hadn’t set foot in a hospital since the crash and I intended to keep it that way. My dad reacted immediately. “It’s okay, I won’t make you go. Let’s see what Dr. Forrest has to say, okay? Look, here he is now.”