by Helen Lacey
“Us,” he replied.
“We’re a situation now?”
“I don’t know what we are,” he said flatly. “You left pretty abruptly the other day.”
“I didn’t want the kids to see me,” she said frankly and spooned a little sugar into her coffee. “It would only confuse them.”
“It confused me, too,” he said and met her gaze. “I thought you might have...”
“Might have what?” she prompted when his words trailed.
“Stayed,” he responded. “Talked. Listened. I don’t know...something.”
“I didn’t want to overanalyze things,” she said. “I still don’t.”
“When we were in bed together, after we made love, I asked you to marry me,” he reminded her. “Again. So...have you considered it?”
She sat back in her seat, her eyes bright, but glaring at him. “Seriously, this is what you wanted to talk about? And how?” She laughed brittlely. “You really suck at proposing, David.”
“I was only trying to—”
“I know what you’re trying to do,” she said hotly. “You’re trying to solve an equation, fix a problem, But I’m a woman, David. I’m a person. I deserve more than to be thought of as anyone’s easy option. I want to be the only person in the world they see. I want it all—the flowers and poems and, hell, even romantic declarations from below a balcony if I can get them.” She pushed the coffee aside and got to her feet. “Thank you for the...offer,” she said tightly. “But, no, thank you.”
She walked off and David quickly dropped a few bills on the table and raced after her. He reached her by the doorway and gently grasped her arm, turning her around.
“Annie, please listen,” he said, taking a breath, garnering his courage. “I promise you, I see you as the woman I—”
“Annie!”
A voice bellowing her name cut through his words and they both turned to face the sound. A man, carrying an overnight bag in one hand and a jacket and huge bouquet of flowers in the other, came barreling toward them. He was a big guy. Tall and broad with arms the size of tree trunks and a beaming smile. David’s gut sank. It had to be the fireman.
“Byron?”
David dropped his hand immediately and watched as the guy zoomed in on her and swiftly hauled her into his arms in a hefty bear hug. He took a step back as emotions swirled in his stomach—confusion, hurt, anger—then gathered momentum. The hugging was going on for far too long. But it gave him a good opportunity to take a long look at the man embracing the woman he loved. Handsome, he supposed you’d call him, in a rugged kind of way.
It was official. He hated him.
But it didn’t look like Annie hated him. In fact, it looked like quite the opposite.
Which made him madder than hell and he wanted to punch the intruder in his perfectly straight teeth.
Fight or flight—that’s all he could think about. And had no illusions. Not that he’d had to hold his own in a bar brawl lately, but he’d had a few fights alongside his cousins with the O’Sullivan boys when he was at high school and generally came out without too much damage done. However, if he fought the fireman, he was pretty sure the guy would knock him out with one punch. Still, leaving wasn’t an option, either.
“Hey, beautiful,” the other man said now she was out of his arms. “Let me take a look at you. Wow,” he said and gave an appreciative whistle. “You’re even more gorgeous in person.”
David’s hands tingled and he fought the urge to stand in front of her like a jealous fool.
“Ah, Byron,” he heard her say. “This is my...my former boss, David McCall. David.” She said his name quietly, like she was wishing him to be somewhere else. “This is Byron Eckart, my...”
Future husband? Future father of her children? Future, full stop?
Her words trailed off and he didn’t want to think about it, let alone shake the other man’s hand. But he did, hating every moment of the interaction. And then forced himself to make polite conversation, all the while letting his hopes for a real future die inside.
Because he’d lost her, for real this time.
* * *
The thing about emotional drama, Annie discovered, is that sometimes it jumped up and bit you when you least expected it. Like now, she thought, once she’d untangled herself from Byron’s Paul Bunyanesque embrace, and made the introductions. Because now she had to figure out what on earth she was going to do, and say, to a man she’d encouraged to come to Cedar River to meet her—and then, because of everything that had happened since Ivan’s collapse, promptly forgotten all about.
Well, almost forgotten.
She did know he planned on visiting. But she wasn’t expecting him to show up in the foyer of her hotel while she was with David. And she had no idea what David must be thinking.
Not happy, was the first thought when she met his gaze and saw his expression.
“It’s nice to meet you,” Byron said with a broad grin. “You’re a tax attorney, right?” he asked, making the profession sound as dull as ditchwater.
“Accountant,” David corrected.
“I’ve got one of those back home,” Byron said, still grinning. “So if things work out between me and Annie, you don’t need to worry about her doing her taxes in the future.”
Annie could feel the tension emanating from David as the seconds ticked by and was relieved when Byron excused himself to check in.
“I know we need to talk,” she said to David, moving to the side so they had some privacy. “But not now.”
He didn’t budge. “I’m not comfortable leaving you here with some guy you’ve never met.”
“It’s a public place,” she reminded him, gesturing around at all the people. “And I’m perfectly safe here. Please go.”
David stiffened. “You’d rather be with him than with me?”
“I’d rather not have this conversation,” she replied.
His gaze narrowed. “Wait a minute. Were you expecting him?”
“Not exactly,” she replied. “I mean, I knew he was coming but I—”
“You knew when?” he demanded. “Before or after we—”
“Before,” she said quickly. “But I wasn’t sure when he—”
“And it didn’t occur to you to contact him and tell him not to come here? And explain that you were already—”
“Already what, David?” she demanded, cutting him off. “Taken? Hooked up? Off the market? Engaged? I’m not your property. I can do what I like and with whom I like.”
“And you like this guy?” he asked incredulously. “Is that it?”
“Yes, David, I do Enough to marry him? I don’t know,” she shot back. “Maybe. He’s nice. And he made the effort to come all this way to see me. So, I’m going to respect that effort and spend some time getting to know him. Now please leave and don’t cause a scene.”
David strode off without another word.
She waited until he was out of sight before concentrating on the man who was now back in front of her, and who was clearly delighted to see her and seemed even nicer in person than in all their video chats.
Once he’d checked into his own room she met him for a drink in the bar and talked about his trip, his job, his hometown and hers, and their possible future. He spoke about Texas, telling her about all the places he would take her if she visited. Annie realized she should have been jumping for joy because a really nice man—and one who clearly liked her—had traveled a very long way to meet up and hopefully kindle their romance. But she wasn’t jumping. She wasn’t anything other than completely miserable. And confused.
This is what you wanted, remember?
Someone romantic. Okay, he ticked the box, as over drinks he gave her the flowers he’d brought, and a lovely book of poetry he thought she would like. And he’d written a sweet message on the inside pa
ge.
Someone insightful—because he immediately asked her if she was okay with him being there, assured her there was no pressure and they could get to know one another at whatever pace she wanted.
Someone who saw her—which he obviously did as he told her several times how beautiful she was.
Someone who made her laugh—he ticked that box too, because he was funny and charming and made her smile.
Yes, Byron was perfect. Except for one important fact.
He wasn’t David McCall.
And it didn’t feel as though David was going to be purged from her heart any time soon.
Only, Annie knew she owed it to Byron to make an effort. He was friendly and talkative and utterly unthreatening. She should have been falling in love with him with each passing second.
But she wasn’t.
“Can I take you to dinner tonight?” he asked as they crossed the foyer to the elevator.
“Sure. The restaurant here is really good.”
“I actually feel like pizza,” he said cheerfully. “Can we get that here? Or can you suggest somewhere else?”
She told him about JoJo’s and made arrangements to meet him back in the foyer at six o’clock.
She headed to her room and called her sister, explaining that Byron had shown up—leaving out any mention of David.
“And is he everything you hoped for?” Tess asked.
“Yes,” she replied. “He’s very nice. And he seems to like me.”
“Of course he likes you,” Tess assured her. “You’re amazing. Have a good time and stay safe. Text me when you get back to your room.”
She dressed in jeans, a bright red shirt and boots and met Byron in the foyer at exactly six o’clock. They walked the half block to JoJo’s and quickly got a booth. They ordered pizza with extra pineapple and were just about to tuck in to their first slices when she saw David walk into the restaurant, holding Scarlett in his arms while Jasper walked by his side.
Her heart rolled over at the sight of them and a deep-rooted longing made every part of her ache. Her eyes burned and she blinked, pushing back the tears that threatened to roll down her cheeks.
It was never meant to be this hard.
“Everything okay?”
Byron’s query forced her to nod and avert her gaze, but not before she saw David glance in her direction. And his look almost ended her.
Annie saw him collect a takeout order and then leave quickly and was glad the kids hadn’t noticed her.
She was back at the hotel an hour later and said good-night to Byron. He kissed her lightly, and although she sensed he wanted more, he didn’t try to persuade his way into her room or her bed. It was a nice, gentle kiss. With zero impact.
And, she suspected they both knew it.
* * *
Over breakfast the following morning, Annie told Byron she didn’t have the feelings for him that either of them had hoped for. He took it well, better than she expected or deserved. And he assured her there were no hard feelings. She knew he was disappointed and obviously a little hurt, but he was a gentleman and suggested they remain friends.
“Is there someone else?” Byron asked and smiled.
She shrugged. “There’s the idea of someone else.”
“Your ex boss?” he queried. “The one I met yesterday? I’m guessing it’s him.”
She nodded, her chest tightening. “How did you know?”
“You talk about him a lot.”
She was startled by his words. “I don’t remember doing that.”
“You talked about the kids a lot. He was part of the package. I figured it out pretty early on. You’ve loved him a long time, right?”
She nodded. “You could say that. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to lead you on, or make you think I was ready for a relationship.”
He sat back in his seat. “I think you are ready...just not with me.” He smiled at her—a little sadly, she thought. “But maybe, when you’re ready...we could still be friends?”
She nodded. “I’d like that.”
He got to his feet and held out his hand. “Goodbye, Annie.”
She shook his hand, relieved that he didn’t try to kiss her again. And when he left the hotel a short time later, Annie didn’t have one spark of regret.
Midmorning she got a call from David and ignored it. Followed by a text. Which she also ignored. She didn’t want to talk. She didn’t want to see him.
She did, however, call her sister.
“I’m tired of living at the hotel. Can I come and stay with you for a while?”
“Of course,” Tess declared. “And I insist you come now.”
She didn’t need any more encouragement and quickly packed her bags, settled her bill at the front desk, and left for the Triple C. Her sister greeted her with smiles and hugs and so much love Annie burst into tears.
“Oh, Tess,” she said as her sister hugged her shoulders and they walked up to the house. “I don’t know what to do.” She explained quickly about Byron.
“I guess you can’t force love, eh?” Tess said gently as they settled in the guest room upstairs.
“Nope. Byron is a nice guy, really nice. And he took it like a champion. He asked if we could be friends and I thought it might be nice to have a male friend—I’ve not had one of those since college. I mean, the only other guy I hang out with is Mitch and he’s my brother-in-law, so he doesn’t count. I guess Jake and the rest of Mitch’s brothers are all kind of in the friend zone.”
“And David?”
“I’m not sure friend-zone fits anymore,” she said and colored hotly as she sat on the edge of the bed.
Tess’s eyes widened into saucers. “You had sex with him?”
She nodded. “Don’t be mad at me,” she said quickly. “It was after Ivan was rushed to hospital. You know how I went and watched the kids and then David came home and we... I don’t know...it was stupid, but I couldn’t help myself.”
Her sister nodded. “Don’t be silly—I’m not mad. I’m concerned that you’re going to get your heart broken.”
“Too late.”
“So, he just what?” Tess asked. “Used you for comfort sex because his father was sick?”
“No, it wasn’t like that,” Annie said in defense, hating that her sister thought so badly of him. “He actually proposed again.”
“And?”
“Well, he’s done that before and this time was just as bad.”
Tess didn’t bother to hide her concern. “Hang on. David asked you to marry him again, and you refused again?”
She nodded. “He thinks it would be a great idea because the kids love me and everything would stay the same. I could go back to living at the ranch, have a baby and the world would turn as per usual. It’s quite the offer, don’t you think?”
Tess hugged her. “Oh, honey, I’m sorry.”
Annie sighed. “The thing is, as crazy as it seems, I do want to marry David. I want to be with the kids. And I want to have a baby with him. But I can’t do it without...without...”
“His love?”
She nodded. “He’s pretty much made it clear that’s not on the table. Companionship and friendship and sex...that’s the offer.”
“He actually said that?”
“No,” she replied. “But I know David. I know how he thinks. I know how he tends to over-think things. I want a partnership and I want the father of my children to need me as I need him. I want the kind of love you have with Mitch, or Abby has with Jake, or like our parents have.”
“And you’re sure you can’t have that with David?” Tess asked.
“He’s asked me to marry him more than once in the past couple of weeks,” she admitted. “And on none of those occasions did he mention anything about how he really feels—only about how sensible the arrangement w
ould be.” She shook her head. “Maybe he just can’t love anyone anymore. Not after...” She took a deep, shuddering breath. “Not after Jayne.”
Of course, she didn’t quite believe that. She knew David had a great capacity for love. She’d witnessed that love firsthand when he was with his children, and his whole family. Even when he was married to Jayne, on the few occasions she had seen them together, she remembered him being attentive and loving.
Maybe it’s just me? Perhaps I’m not the kind of woman that a man falls crazy in love with.
The truth was, she’d had very little romance in her life and never had a man say he loved her. The relationships she’d had in college were too young, too brief, to really be about that kind of emotion. She hiccupped back a sob, for a moment thinking about how it made her feel, as though she was unlovable and dull. And then she scolded herself for being ridiculous. Just because David hadn’t fallen madly in love with her, it didn’t mean someone else wouldn’t. The only thing was, she didn’t want anyone else.
“I need to forget about this and think about what I can control,” she announced, determined to put it all behind her. She quickly told her sister about the interview in Rapid City. “It went well, I think. It’s only part-time, but with my savings I can manage with that for a while. And another woman at a job I interviewed for last week wants to bring me back again for a second interview, so we’ll see.”
“Well, I insist you live here with us,” Tess said firmly. “Until you work out where you want to be. And don’t say no,” her sister added when Annie held up a hand. “Mitch will insist, too.”
Annie nodded agreeably. “I don’t quite know what’s come over me. I never used to be sentimental and sappy and... I don’t know,” she said and sighed, “pathetic.”
“You’re not pathetic,” Tess said firmly and sat beside her. “You have a broken heart. Remember how I was an emotional wreck when I came back to Cedar River last year—pregnant after a one-night stand with my ex-husband, who I had convinced myself had no feelings left for me whatsoever? You were my rock back then, Annie. Let me be your rock now. That’s what family does for each other.”