I watch her closely, hearing the truth in her words and seeing the determination to get what she wants. I couldn’t be fucking prouder, because even with no money, living in a flat, she was made to do big things.
I jump down from the ramp, stepping up to her. Her breath hitches and the swell of her breasts rise and fall with each breath. I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, gazing into her eyes.
“I’m not going anywhere. Whether you want to believe me or not, what we had was real. It might not have been conventional, but it was raw. I’m not going to give that up. I’m not going to give you up. Being with you changed me, changed the path I was leading,” I tell her, stepping even closer, so our bodies are flush. She takes in a shaky breath, her eyelids fluttering, and I inwardly smirk.
“Kai,” she whispers, briefly squeezing her eyes shut.
“You don’t want this to end any more than I do. Deep down, you’re just conflicted. You’re worried what people will think—” I start, but the feral growl at the back of her throat cuts me off.
“I don’t give a fuck what people think of me.”
I smirk, seeing the fiery Ivy I know and adore. “But you think society would think you are crazy for being with me.”
“I am crazy for wanting you,” she blurts out, her eyes round.
I smile, inwardly puffing my chest out with pride. “But you want me,” I demand.
“Kaiden, I can’t do this,” she whines.
“I’ll let you go—for now,” I tell her, and I watch her shoulders droop with relief. “But I won’t stay away for long.”
Her entire body tenses as she glares up at me. “I might be putting the bitch façade away for a bit, but that doesn’t mean I’ll let you or any other person walk all over me. I can’t make you stay away, Kaiden. I can’t. But don’t start crying when your smothering is the reason I stay away completely.”
“You wouldn’t.” I curse.
“Then give me fucking space,” she snaps. “If you care, you’d do this for me, for us. I’m telling you I want to change my perspective on life and start living. I need to grow up and make something of myself. You need to respect that or walk away. Our relationship is the definition of complicated and we need to be on the same page before we even think of starting this back up.”
“We will start back up,” I demand. “I’m not letting you fucking go. I’ll give you time, but don’t expect me to act like you don’t exist.”
She snorts, rolling her eyes. “Good of you.”
She turns and leaves. I twist around and punch the tree trunk, cursing. My knuckles split and I clench and unclench my fist, already feeling it begin to swell.
She’s makes me so fucking mad. Why can’t she see how much I want her, need her? I want to be there for her.
“You love her,” Grant states, and I spin around, finding him lurking behind the tree.
“What the fuck are you doing out here?” I demand, walking over to him.
He shrugs, pushing his hands in his pocket. I left him in bed, resting, when I got the phone call from Mum.
“I wanted to apologise to her. I always felt this darkness inside of me, but I told myself over and over that it was okay because I’d never truly hurt anyone. I lost my mind when she arrived, Kai, and did some fucked up shit. I don’t know how I can move past this. I need her to know I’m sorry.”
“Hey,” I softly call out. “We all did some pretty messed up shit, Grant. We all have a lot to learn from her.”
“Yeah,” his whispers, glancing up at the sky and closing his eyes. When he reopens them, his expression is dark. “She’s never going to make it at that school with Danielle there."
I lean back against the tree, wincing at the throbbing pain in my knuckles. “She’s stronger than we ever gave her credit for.”
“Danielle’s up to something, and we all know she doesn’t have a soul.”
“Yeah, but Ivy has us,” I remind him.
“It doesn’t matter, not if we’re too broken to fix ourselves,” he snaps.
“Speak for yourself,” I snidely reply.
He laughs without humour. “Bro, you are so broken you have missing pieces. We all are. And your love for her will cloud your judgement. You won’t be able to do what’s necessary to protect her.”
“I don’t fucking love her,” I bark. “And I’ll lay my life down for hers. She deserves to be free, Grant. She deserves to have a life, to not have conflict and torment in it. I’ll do everything in my power to make sure she gets it, so you don’t need to worry about it.”
He scoffs, pulling a face. “You can’t even admit you’re in love with her.”
“That’s because I’m not.”
He shakes his head. “You are. There’s been no other chick you’ve gotten this hard for. You’re obsessed with her. And I bet if it turned out she was lying about her mum and the recording, you’d still want her. You wanted her the minute she pulled up. Stop lying to yourself,” he says, with a pang of pity in his tone.
“I’m not in fucking love with her,” I repeat, but the words turn sour in my mouth. I care deeply for Ivy, but love? I growl, running my hand over my jaw. “I don’t.”
“When you realise you do, let me know, because you’ll need my help with those bitches at school.”
I glare up at him. How dare he insinuate I can’t protect her. “She’s fucking mine,” I bark. “And if you’ve forgotten, you tried to kill yourself a few hours ago.”
He grabs me by the scruff of my shirt. “Don’t fucking mention it again.”
He shoves at my chest and I stagger back two steps. I straighten, glaring him. “So, you’re going to act like it didn’t happen?”
“No, I’m not. I would have done it without regret. It doesn’t mean I’m weak. I just wanted the anger, resentment and pain to stop. Once I realised it was true, I didn’t want Ivy seeing my face every day, being a reminder of what he did to her mum or what I did to her. I didn’t want to look in the mirror and see the person I’ve become. I have nothing, Kai. Nothing. It’s all gone and there’s nothing I can do about it. But you talked me down today, gave me a reason to keep going, to find redemption. It’s going to start with Ivy. It might not make what’s happened right, but I’ll have done more than my dad ever would have. And I’m telling you, she’s not safe at that school. Danielle has been recruiting girls in their hall.”
“You give Danielle credit where it’s not warranted. She might be a bitch, but not all of the girls in the school are like her. And I’ll be ready. I’ve got a few people watching out for Ivy already. I’ve also hacked into the school security system,” I tell him. “I’m sorry for what I said. I didn’t mean it to come out that way. I’m here for you, always. We aren’t our dads and Ivy doesn’t think we are either.”
“Yeah, I guess,” he murmurs, not sounding convinced. “I’m going to head back to the house. I still feel like I’ve got more to throw up.”
“It’s going to be okay,” I tell him, needing him to know that. I’m not making excuses for him, but I refuse to turn my back on someone who’s been my friend my whole life.
“I hope so,” he tells me, walking away. He pauses a few feet away, turning back to me. “Hey, did my lawyer leave a message with you?”
“Lawyer?” I ask, frowning. “I’ve not spoken to one.”
“I’ll ask the twins. When I called him back, his receptionist answered and said he left a message with a Mr Kingsley.”
“Ask Ethan. He brought your shit into the house.”
“You not coming in?”
I glance at Monroe Manor and back at the ramp. “Nah, I’m going stay out here. I need to think.”
“Well, don’t think too hard. You might cause permanent damage.”
“Fuck you!”
He forces a smile. “Just be careful. Your dad is going to have heard mine got caught and he’s going to get desperate. He’s going to want the evidence destroyed.”
“What?” I call out, and he pauses, taking a
few steps closer before looking around to make sure no one is listening.
“When I went to see my dad this morning, his lawyer kept questioning the evidence. It’s only reliable if it’s the original, otherwise they can say it was altered.”
I frown, wondering if that claim would work. “I’m sure Nova has already got it in a safe somewhere. She won’t give it to the police. She doesn’t trust that Dad won’t pay someone off to get it.”
“Like I said, be careful.”
I nod, watching him for a moment before jumping back up the ramp, lying down on my back on the platform.
Life has never been simple—we all have issues—but lately, I feel like we can’t catch a break.
Ivy’s right. We do need to grow up. I don’t want to wake up one day in twenty years and realise I’m just like my dad. I want to be better. I am better.
But if anyone comes at what is mine, nothing will stop me from unleashing hell on them.
Ivy might need time, but nothing—not even my dad—will stop me from protecting her. I don’t run. I fight for what is mine. And she’s mine. She has been since the moment she arrived in Cheshire Grove.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
IVY
“Something’s changed with you,” Selina comments, looking up from her phone.
“I’m surprised you’ve noticed. You’ve been glued to that phone all morning,” I retort when we pull up outside the Academy.
“I’m still listening and paying attention. Something’s changed. What is it?”
I grab my belongings off the floor before looking over at her. She’s watching me, and it’s unnerving.
I shrug, glancing away. “It just hit me that I need to grow up. If I’m going to stay here, I need to embrace the life Nova is gifting me with.”
“And Nova? I noticed you seemed more relaxed around her.”
“She’s my aunt. I’m sick of pretending I don’t give a shit about anything.”
“You don’t?” she teases.
I chuckle. “Okay, I don’t really give a shit about anything; some things aren’t worth caring about. I’m not one of those girls who has an issue with every little detail of their life or gets crazy about minimal things.”
“That’s true! I’m glad you are working on things with her. She might not be married to Sam anymore, but she’s always been my aunt. She’s helped me a lot over the years, and if she was given a chance, she would have done the same with you. It doesn’t hurt that she isn’t a snob like most of the people in our lives. She’s actually pretty down to earth.”
I laugh, dropping my hand away from the door handle. “You are kidding, right? When I first met her, she was so formal and stiff. I think it’s why I instantly took a dislike to her. I couldn’t trust her. She reminded me of a few of the teachers who worked at my old school,” I explain, and when she opens her mouth, I hold my hand up. “I know that isn’t who she is. I can understand, to a degree, why she kept a lot from me. It doesn’t hurt any less, but I’m going to push myself through it. If you had asked me a few weeks ago, I would have told you I hated her and I was leaving.”
“Then why did you stay?”
“I guess my subconscious wouldn’t let me. It could be because I have selfish reasons for not wanting to go. I’ve had a lot of time since the accident to think about it, and each time I’ll make excuses for my behaviour. But there aren’t any. I’m going to give her a chance because whether I like it or not, I need her. I want to have someone I can turn to. For people with money, it’s easy to go out into the world and live, but for me and others like me, it’s scary. I’d have no family, no friends, nothing. And I’m so goddamn scared I’ll end up like my mum, living off benefits and stealing from men who come in and out of my life.”
“You aren’t selfish for wanting a better life. Everyone in this world wishes for something, Ivy, and I bet most of them wish for the same thing. It’s life. It’s hard, cruel and scary, but there’s also happiness, laughter and love, if you let it in. I don’t want you to leave. I’d probably follow you, because I’d miss you like crazy.”
I think about it for a moment and nod. “I’d miss your crazy arse too. But I’m warning you now, so you’re prepared; if I find out Nova has kept anything else from me, I’m leaving. I can’t be around tainted and messed up people anymore. I want to be around people I can trust and who have my back. I’m not saying I trust her—I think it will take a lot of time to build that between us—but I do want to.”
“She won’t let you down, none of us will,” she declares before taking a deep breath. “Let’s get today over with. We don’t have classes tomorrow and I want to relax and work on my tan before summer leaves us for good.”
I chuckle as I push open my door. “You’ve just jinxed it. This has been the longest, hottest summer I’ve ever known.”
She waves her hand at me, frowning. “I had my fingers crossed when I said it, so we’re good.”
I roll my eyes because she believes that shit will make a difference.
“What do you have first?” she asks when she finishes reading her message.
“Literacy then Art.”
“I won’t see you until lunch, then. Just text me when you’re done and I’ll meet you. I don’t have anything after my first class until after lunch.”
“All right,” I tell her, pulling the map out of my bag. I find where I need to go then tell Selina my goodbyes.
*** *** ***
Having made it through my first lesson, I can’t help but compare the Academy to my old school. I understand one was high school and this is a private university/college, but the differences in teaching and how they are run are so contrast.
It wouldn’t hurt the wealthy to donate funds to those in real need instead of to a school that is exceptionally modernised. If my old school could have afforded white boards or even projection boards, I might have done better. Instead, I struggled to make out what was written on the chalk boards.
Still in my own head and thinking how outrageous this school is on technology, I don’t feel someone walk up behind me until it’s too late.
“Put me down, Lucca,” I plead, ignoring the people staring openly at us.
He drops me to the floor, puffing out a breath. “I thought we were friends again.”
I sigh, glaring over at him. “Who said we were friends to begin with?”
He smirks, knocking his shoulder into mine playfully. “You did. You said, Lucca, you are the bestest friend a girl could wish for.”
“You need friends,” I mutter dryly.
“But we’re cool, right?” he asks, his voice lower so we can’t be overheard.
I stop near a set of double doors and face him. “Did you know any of it?”
He scans the hallway before frowning down at me. “If you’re asking if I knew my dad was a monster, yes, but if you’re asking if I knew about your mum, then no. We didn’t have a clue. Growing up, Kaiden shielded us from a lot,” he explains honestly. “I know Ethan and I have explained why we did what we did when we first met you, and had we known the entire situation, there would have been no way we would have taken it that far. It doesn’t excuse what we did, I know. We’re ashamed.”
I run my fingers through my hair, pushing it away from my face. “Don’t change, Lucca. I’m not saying to go around groping girls—”
“Unless they’re willing, right? We can still grope girls who want it?”
A small giggle slips past my lips and I shake my head at him. “Whatever. The point is, don’t change for me. You and Ethan work being dicks. You aren’t malicious or cruel unless it’s aimed at someone who’s hurt you. It’s weird that you guys are being nice to me. It doesn’t feel real or right.”
He feigns hurt, placing the palm of his hand over his chest. “That wounds me. I thought we had something special,” he teases before composing himself, his expression turning serious. “You’re one of us now. We don’t want to lose you. We’ve never had a girl in our group before, not one
we’ve not wanted to shag anyway. I can’t explain it, but since you arrived it feels like we’re closer to each other. It’s starting to feel more like a family.”
The vulnerability in his voice is my undoing. My friendship with the twins has blossomed, and I can’t help but have a soft spot for them.
“All right, but this doesn’t mean you can sit with me at lunch,” I warn him.
He pouts, blinking those eyelashes at me. “One lunch a week?”
“No,” I tell him, walking past him so I’m not late to my next class.
“Come on, one lunch. I’m not asking for much,” he states, following me. People watch him as he walks by, girls openly undressing him with their eyes and lads looking on with envy in their eyes.
“Will you go away?” I order, pushing him lightly.
“Not until you agree to sit with us for lunch.”
“No!” I snap.
When he stops, I don’t bother stopping to find out what has diverted his attention. Knowing Lucca, it’s probably a girl.
“Ivy Monroe,” he yells down the hall, and I pause at another set of doors, groaning. “Have lunch with us. Don’t break my heart. Don’t ruin this beautiful friendship. I’m sorry I broke your Michael Myers doll. I’m sorry I accidently burnt your voodoo dolls.”
I groan when he continues to yell out freaky items, knowing I’ve never owned them.
Just when I’m ready to give in, Clary, the girl I met yesterday, is standing beside me, facing Lucca.
“Kingsley, go hassle someone who cares about your freakish fetishes.”
“You love my fetishes. Admit it, Whitmore, you want me to handcuff you to my bed,” he calls back, amusement in his voice. When I turn back, he’s smirking at Clary.
Her lips twist in disgust. “I’d rather be tied up with wild animals than to your bed. Less chance of catching fleas—you know, with all the dogs you and your brother take to bed.”
His smirk spreads into a grin. “But you admit that you want to be tied up?”
She shakes her head, clearly used to his behaviour. “Wouldn’t you like to know,” she flirts back, winking at him.
Crowd of Lies (Kingsley Academy Book 2) Page 13