Shivering, I agreed.
Chapter Eight
ALLIE
December 1
Arizona
Mia’s soft snores tickled my neck, her breath warm and sweet. I barely breathed for fear of waking her. I hadn’t had a moment to myself since Az had found me feeding his brother. He’d kept good on his word that I would be supervised twenty-four seven. Even if the supervision sometimes came in the form of a snuggly toddler.
I’d spent most of the morning in my favorite pastime – gazing at my daughter’s sleeping face. Nothing was more beautiful. I thought I had memorized every line and dimple but each morning seemed to bring something new, and a tug of sadness pulled at my chest. She was leaving the last vestiges of babyhood behind and was well into toddlerhood. Soon, she’d be a preschooler.
My forehead tightened and tears sprang to my eyes as I realized the foolishness of that thought. How would she even get the chance? If we ever got out of here, we would be on the run the rest of our lives from the Awakened and the police. There would be no happy preschool days and play dates for us. I was wanted for murder and kidnapping, and had no way of proving my innocence. And Laurent, who’d tried to protect us, was under lock and key, his mind no longer his own.
Holding back a sob, I slid out of the bed, careful to not disturb Mia. I made my way to the en-suite bathroom, locked the door behind me, and clutched the edge of the sink. The cool marble under my hands and feet sent shivers through my body and I moved to sit on the closed toilet, pulling my feet up and wrapping my arms around my knees. Shoulders shaking and gasping for breath, I cried deeply and quietly.
We were well and truly fucked.
My stomach clenched until I thought I would vomit. I had to get myself under control. Couldn’t let Mia wake up and see me like this. I wiped tears away with shaking hands then clutched them over my mouth in a silent scream. It was all catching up to me—the Myers … Laurent … David…. My stomach heaved and I quickly changed positions, opened the toilet lid, and dry retched until my throat burned and mucous poured from my nose.
A tiny tap at the door registered in my brain and I stood in panic. Had Mia awakened? With fumbling fingers, I turned on the sink tap and splashed water over my face.
“Alison, are you all right?”
I recognized the whisper – it was Liang. Mia must have still been asleep.
“Just a minute,” I whispered back. Shit, shit, shit. I grimaced at my reflection. There would be no hiding the wreckage. I wondered if she’d buy it if I claimed an allergic reaction. Didn’t matter, I told myself, though I hated being seen as weak. I rinsed my face with more cold water and brushed my teeth, then combed my hair as possible. I flexed my fingers several times to stop their trembling then ran them over my Awakened-issued, soft, white pajamas.
Another deep breath and look at the ceiling and I was ready to open the door.
Liang’s concerned gaze took me in at a glance and her mouth thinned. She pulled a com from her pocket and paged Nadia in a low voice.
I frowned at her then looked toward Mia. Her soft snores still drifted from the bed. I motioned to Liang with my head to come with me to the hall and she followed. “Why did you call for Nadia?” I whispered harshly.
“Because she can watch Mia while I show you something.”
Crossing my arms, I glared. “What?”
“Something that might help you feel better.”
As if anything could. Still, she’d piqued my curiosity. “Like what?”
A hand touched my shoulder from behind and I jumped.
“Are you unwell?” Nadia asked.
“I’m fine,” I gritted out, unnerved by her glowing, wolf eyes. I knew she needed them to see and was glad for her that Laurent had taught her how to transform only that part of herself. But it was still freaky. Especially since they were narrowed on my face, and clearly unconvinced by my lie.
“Seriously, fine over here,” I repeated.
She moved her attention to Liang.
“Stay with Mia and let us know when she wakes,” Liang told her.
She nodded and moved toward the door.
“Wait,” I said. “I didn’t agree to this.”
“You don’t have to. You just have to come with me, or I can call your father.”
My hands clenched so hard my knuckles cracked, the sound popping in the hallway. Nadia’s mouth opened and Liang smiled. Her amusement made me even angrier.
“Come on,” she said. “I swear it won’t be so bad. You might even enjoy it.”
“What I’d really enjoy right now is wiping that smile off your face.”
She had the nerve to laugh. “You can try, if it will make you feel better. But don’t get upset when you lose.”
“Maybe I should call Azkuran,” Nadia mumbled.
“No!” Liang and I spoke simultaneously and Nadia’s eyes widened.
“At least we are in agreement,” Liang said.
I heaved a sigh and relented, briefly wondering if curiosity would get this alley cat killed.
After we left Nadia to babysit—I really wasn’t worried about that, Mia adored her—we walked what felt like miles until we reached a grotto I’d never seen. My breath caught and I was impressed despite my determination not to be. It was different from the crystal cave Az had shown Mia. Larger, with more ambient light and a vibe that raised the hair on my arms.
“What is this?” I ran my hand over a crystal ledge surrounding a pool of deep water. A soft mist floated around the area, both warm and refreshing at the same time. I’d never seen anything like it.
“A well of truth,” said Liang, her voice reverent. “They’re very rare, only a handful in the world, but this continent has three, which is why we were drawn to it.”
I nodded as if that all made sense, captivated by the beauty of the well. A small part of my brain said perhaps I should be concerned, but a sense of well-being had drifted into me, calming my emotions into a state of wonder. I stroked another large crystal that served as a brick in the ledge. There was no detectable light source, yet the cave glowed, as if illuminated by the crystals. Or magic.
“There is so much more people are not yet aware of,” said Liang, as if reading my thoughts. “This world has much to offer—we have much to offer—if only we worked together.”
There it was again. That little tickle in the back of my brain trying to make me pay attention. “We?”
She made a circular motion in the air with her hand. “Collective ‘we’. The Awakened and the rest of the world.” She moved her hand back and forth between the two of us. “And specific ‘we’. You and I. Az and his brother.”
Maybe there was something in the mist getting to me, but once more, I nodded absently. My attention had been caught by a movement in the water. I leaned over the crystal to peer into the well. The small amount of surface mist sparkled and swirled away, allowing me to see my reflection. It was joined by Liang’s, who had moved beside me.
She was still beautiful, reflected in the water. Nothing had changed. But my own reflected eyes stared back at me in shock. I knew what I looked like, and that wasn’t it. That looked like….
“Your mother, yes,” Liang said. “You look so much like her. Even with the dyed bits, since she had dyed her hair while on the run.”
The face beside Liang’s was my own, but the hair kept cycling colors: blonde, black, purple. Seeing sadness on Liang’s face, I asked. “How well did you know her?”
“She was one of my best friends, along with Laurent and Azkuran. We grew up together.”
My attention snapped away from the pool to the woman beside me. “You grew up with them?”
A ghost of a smile crossed her face, gone before it could fully form. “Are you finally interested in your history, Allie?”
A blow to the gut. My breath whooshed out as if she’d actually hit me. As if she’d actually spoken. I realized that neither of us had spoken a word since we’d entered the grotto. When I felt she read
my mind, she actually had. And I had been reading hers.
“What’s going on?” I asked aloud, my panicky voice sounding too loud in the cave.
“I’m trying to show you the truth, Alison. I thought you might be ready for it, but perhaps I was wrong.”
I felt her sadness. Her frustration and disappointment. Her sense of urgency.
“What kind of mind fuck is this?” My hip hit the crystal ledge as I backed away.
Liang caught me before I fell into the water. Pulling me upright, she squeezed my arms a little too hard. “Grow up, Alison. I know you’ve been through some hellish experiences, but so have we all. You need to start asking questions—the right questions—and stop wallowing in self-pity if you want any kind of decent life for your daughter.”
My attempt to roughly push her away only succeeded in me nearly falling backward again. That woman was strong. It was like pushing a mountain.
“Here,” she snapped. She pulled out a communication device from a pocket of her uniform and thrust it at me. “When you’re ready to learn more, press here to call me.” She indicated a button then stalked past me.
When I saw she was leaving me behind, I trotted after her. I would never find my way back alone.
She whirled around and glared at me. “Stay here. You don’t trust me, fine. But look at the pool. Study it. Meditate on your questions and you will see it doesn’t lie.” She leaned down into my face. “But it won’t let you lie to yourself, either. You need to be prepared for that.”
“I need to go check on Mia,” I blurted.
She scoffed and shook her head. “You were never cowardly before. Don’t start now.”
And with those little words of wisdom, she disappeared.
I did an unappreciated impression of a gaping fish for several seconds before the anger kicked in. I was no coward. I turned back to the well, steadying myself for whatever came next.
Chapter Nine
PHOEBE
December 1
Chicago
Either Luke was going easy on me, or I was getting better. A quick glance at his profile revealed sweat streams running from his hairline to his jaw. Pride brought a smile to my face. That guy wouldn’t go easy on anyone.
He looked up and caught my eye. A rueful-looking twist moved his lips before he spoke. “Proud of yourself, are you?”
“You betcha.” Without thinking, I snapped a towel at his arm. Fortunately, he caught it with a smile and didn’t kill me.
Snatching the towel from my hand, he wiped his face with it then tossed it back to me. “You have reason to be,” he said. You’re doing well.”
My cheeks warmed from the praise. I hoped my face was already red from exertion and he wouldn’t notice. I wasn’t used to praise for anything other than academic achievement, but this wasn’t so bad. He had praised a skill and I could accept that.
The compliments I still couldn’t—and possibly never would—accept, were comments on my appearance. Thankfully, Luke seemed completely unfazed. Perhaps he took my appearance for granted because he didn’t know me before.
Or perhaps I was turning into an egomaniac, expecting guys to be bowled over by my beauty.
I snorted at my vanity and he raised his brows.
“You can’t take a compliment?”
“What?” It took a second before my brain kicked into gear. “Oh, sorry.” I waved my hand. “That’s not it. I just thought of something else.”
He gave me a dubious look. “Right. Let me know when you’re ready for another round.”
“Sure, sure. Any time.” My voice was chirpy from embarrassment and he smirked as he left the gym.
I slapped my forehead when the door closed behind him. What was wrong with me? My social skills were at an all-time low, and they had never been stellar.
Awkward Geek Girl, Phoebe is thy name.
My stomach sank when I remembered his face as he left. Please don’t let his smirk mean he thinks I like him.
Considering, I shook my head. No, I was being silly. Everyone already believed I had a thing for Nathan. As much as that irked me, it might be okay in this case. After a quick stretch of my neck and shoulders, I picked up my gym bag and headed out into the hall.
Just in time to see Gabe talking to Luke, with Nathan at their side.
“Umn, hey. What’s going on?” I scanned their faces. Gabe was calm as always, and Nathan’s eyes lit with some type of recognition when he saw me. But whether because he knew me, or just recognized there was another person in the hall, I didn’t know.
“Getting ready to go work on your boy, here,” Luke said.
My lips thinned. He’d just confirmed two—no, three things for me. One, he also believed I liked Nathan. Two, he would never go easy on me. And three, he was an ass.
But he was an ass who was trying to fix Nathan.
“Can I help?” I asked.
Nathan made a noise of discontent and I moved toward him. “Are you all right? Are you in pain?”
He backed away, shaking his head, and I dropped the arm I’d reached out.
With wide eyes, he looked at Luke. “No,” he whispered.
“It’s all right,” Gabe told him. “She doesn’t have to be there.”
Luke nodded and Nathan relaxed a little.
“Umn, sure. I’ll be going now,” I muttered, and hurried down the hall before the tears that had sprung to my eyes fell down my cheeks.
I was still in my room, trying to distract myself by practicing simple spells Nia had shown me, when Luke appeared at my door. His hair was messier than before and lines of stress carved his brow.
“I think you should come with me,” he said.
“Is Nathan all right?” I asked around the fear constricting my throat.
He shrugged. “About the same. But I think you should be there, even if he objects.”
I raced behind him down the corridors to the clinic area, not thinking to ask why until we reached the room where Nathan was being kept. I stopped Luke before he opened the door.
“Why do you want me to be here?”
“Because, you are the only person he seems to actually recognize. Where his responses appear spontaneous and genuine.”
Without giving me a chance to respond, he opened the door.
Nathan’s bed was empty. “Where is he?” I asked, trying to not panic.
“Not here,” Luke said as he walked across the room.
“Yeah, duh, Captain Obvious. I’m going to find Ga—” I stopped when Luke ran a finger over a seam in the wall and the seam started to glow. He stepped closer and the light beam coming from the wall crossed over his face. The light grew wider as the wall slid open.
Well, blow me.
Unpleasant chills pebbled my skin as memories of the Awakened’s underground clinic flashed through my mind. It got worse when the opening revealed the hidden room behind Nathan’s bed. Monitors, displaying everything from the Weather Channel to Sesame Street, to the streets outside, covered most of the wall above a high counter that held multiple electronics. Some I recognized, some not. An operating table dominated the center of the room, and Nathan lay unconscious and restrained upon it.
Outraged, I opened my mouth to ask if Gabe knew about this, but closed it again when I realized he must. I rushed to Nathan’s side and glared at Luke. “What are you doing to him? And what’s all this?” I pointed at the monitors. It was so much like the room I had seen the day I’d met Ammon, I felt sick.
“It’s a multi-purpose room, actually,” Luke said, his tone neutral. He pointed to one of the monitors. “This lets me follow the latest from the NEIC, since some tectonic shifts might be related to Awakened activity rather than natural phenomena.”
“What?”
He sighed. “National Earthquake Information Center. Keep up. These others,” he indicated the rest of the monitors, “are either keeping an eye on unusual world events or being used to try to reverse-brainwash your guy there.”
“He’s….�
�� I shook my head, not knowing where to start. My brain latched on to the thing that most represented the sense of absurdity reeling through it. “Sesame Street?”
“It’s innocent. Easy.” Luke grinned at Nathan’s quiet form. “And he seems to like it.”
“Seriously? That’s what you’re doing?”
“We’re flying sorta blind here. Using whatever works to keep him calm. The extent of brain damage is still unknown, but he seems to be stimulated in positive ways by the bright colors and simple dialogue, which is a good start.”
I glanced down. Nathan’s long, dark lashes rested against his cheeks. “He doesn’t look particularly stimulated to me. So, why am I here?”
“I’m going to bring him up again in a few minutes and I want you to be the first thing he sees.”
I squinted at Luke. “Why?”
“Told you. He often seems more lucid around you. Also, conditioning.”
Wasn’t loving the sound of that. “Conditioning? Like imprinting?”
“Consider it positive associations. We’re hoping he wasn’t in stasis long enough for the full brainwashing to take effect.” He gestured toward Nathan’s still-healing eye, where wires were visible just below the skin. “But with all the modifications, we can’t be sure. And better safe than shark bait, eh?”
“No,” I said flatly.
“No?”
“Did I stutter? I’m not going to be part of some separate brainwashing scheme.”
If Luke tried to help him naturally move past any implanted suggestions by the Awakened, I was all for it. But I was not going to be a party to replacing those suggestions with ones featuring me as his mother duck. It was anathema. Nathan’s choices, my choices—too many had been taken from us already.
Besides, how pathetic would it be to have somebody brainwashed into liking you? No. No way.
“So, you’d let him turn into a rotting vegetable rather than help?”
“That’s not what I’m saying,” I hissed. “There’s got to be another way. You just said he responds to Sesame Street. Let him fixate on a puppet.” Even as I said it, my gut gave another clench. Poor Nathan.
Reset: Part 1 (The Awakening Book 4) Page 4