“But Daddy, I want Rachel to come over,” Nell whined.
“But you’re feeling sick, so it’s probably not the best idea,” James said.
Nell looked really sad, and I wished there was something I could do for her. But I wasn’t going to overstep. Not now. I had to listen to what James wanted. He was her father after all. Nell looked at me like she wanted me to do something, and I felt like my hands were tied.
“I’ll be up in my office if you need me,” James said, and then he walked off and headed up the stairs.
I walked over to the couch and sat down next to Nell, who looked really sad. I placed my wrist on her forehead and felt that she was a little warm.
“You do feel just a little warm, but it doesn’t feel like a fever,” I said.
“If it’s not a fever then you should come over,” Nell said.
“Yeah, but you should be getting rest, sweetheart. I can come over another time,” I said.
“But I want you to come over tonight,” Nell said.
I loved how much she wanted me to come over, but I didn’t want to step on toes. Especially not with this.
“But I want you to take care of me. My daddy doesn’t know how to take care of me; he would never check my forehead like that,” Nell said. It all just broke my heart, because I could tell she was craving some sort of female attention. She just wanted somebody to take care of her. Someone that had the female touch. This was a little girl who missed her mom, whether she remembered her much or not.
“Well, maybe I can come over for a little while, just to take care of you tonight. But we have to talk with your dad first.” I said.
Nell nodded her head. I told her to stay put, and I’d be right back in just a couple of minutes. I went upstairs and knocked on the open door much as I had done before. It made me wonder if he ever closed it, because since I’d worked there, it hadn’t been closed, not even once.
“Hey,” James said, “You can come in.”
“Hey, I was thinking. Nell said she really wants me to come over and take care of her.” I felt nervous. My hands were sweating, and my heart was racing. I wasn’t sure if that had to do with asking him if I could take care of Nell, or was simply from being around him.
“Why is that?” he asked.
“She said she thinks I could take care of her better,” I said with a laugh. To make sure that he knew I was only kidding and wasn’t trying to say anything bad. “I think it may be a scam,” I said, smiling.
“Well, I guess that’s actually true. I really don’t know what I’m doing half the time,” he said to me suddenly. It took me by surprise because it was such a big revelation from him.
“That’s okay. I think that’s part of it,” I said.
“I know,” he said. He looked like he wanted to say more, but he didn’t.
“Listen, Nell feels a little warm; do you happen to have any Tylenol?” I asked him.
He stood up from his desk and grabbed his keys. “I picked some up this morning; I just forgot to bring it in. Let me run out to the car,” he said.
I followed him out of his office and down the stairs, where Nell was still sitting on the couch. She looked like she was about to fall asleep. I felt bad for her. I hated it when kids were sick.
James came back inside a moment later, carrying a little bag. He pulled out the Tylenol and looked at the back, but he looked confused.
“Here, let me do it,” I said, taking the bottle from him.
I removed the plastic from the top, took the little cup off, and unscrewed the lid. I turned it over and read the directions on the back, making sure to pour the perfect amount for her age. I filled the small cup with the pink liquid and handed it to Nell.
“Does this stuff taste gross?” she asked.
I shook my head. “Nope, it should taste like bubblegum,” I said.
Nell tipped her head back with the little cup and drank the liquid.
“Good job, Nell,” James said. Then he looked at me, “Thank you. Seriously, thank you.”
“It’s no problem,” I said to him.
I left work a few minutes before them so I could walk to my apartment and grab my car. I drove over to the gallery where Nell and James were patiently waiting for me in the car, then I followed them to James’s house. Getting out, we quickly went inside.
I’d never been inside their house yet, and it was just like I’d been imagining. Small, but not too small. Not like my apartment. It was a three-bedroom, two-bathroom home. So, they had some extra room.
Once inside, Nell led me to her room. I thought it was sweet that she wanted to show me her room so badly. It was pink and very ‘princessy.’ She told me about all of her favorite toys and books, and I loved that she liked to read.
“Do you need me to get anything from the store?” James asked me.
I gave him a list of ingredients that I use in my special chicken noodle soup. Nell had just asked for something to eat, and I figured it would be perfect. Then I turned towards Nell.
“Do you like chicken noodle soup?” I asked her.
“I do. I love chicken noodle soup,” she said.
“So do I,” James said, “I’ll be back with the ingredients.”
James left, and I sat with Nell on her bed while she read me some of her books. For being in kindergarten, she was very smart. I was surprised at how much she could read.
James returned fifteen minutes later, and I helped him unload the groceries. He pointed me in the direction of all the utensils I was going to need, and I started working on my chicken noodle soup. I typically liked to make the chicken from scratch, but tonight it needed to be quicker, so I just had him just grab a rotisserie chicken instead.
“Man, this is so good,” James said, as we all sat around the table and ate the soup.
“It tastes a little better when I can make it all from scratch,” I said.
“It can taste better than this?” he asked.
I laughed.
“I love this!” Nell said.
“Good, I’m glad,” I said.
For the first time in such a long time, I felt needed, something I hadn’t experienced in so long. It felt good to feel that way again. It had only been a few weeks since I started working for him, and yeah, I was already feeling ten times better than before. I felt that I owed it all to James and Nell.
He insisted on cleaning up, despite my protests. Nell picked out a movie, and I put it on the TV for her. I went back into the kitchen to help out, but he was already almost done.
“I told you I had this,” he said with a smile.
I laughed, and then we stood there and stared into each other’s eyes. For a moment, I thought that he might kiss me. And then Nell came into the kitchen.
“I think I’m ready for bed,” Nell said.
“Wow, you must really not be feeling well,” James said. Then he looked at me, “Usually, I can’t get her to go to bed.”
Nell didn’t say anything; she just smiled at me. I let her lead me into her room where I tucked her in and helped James put her to bed.
“Thank you, Rachel,” Nell told me.
“What for?” I asked her.
“For coming to take care of me,” Nell said.
I told her I was very flattered that she wanted me to come in the first place. She would never know how much it truly meant to me that she had wanted me here to take care of her while she was sick.
Once Nell was settled into bed, James walked me to my car. As we stood outside under the stars, I felt a spark of something again.
“Thanks for everything you did tonight,” James said.
“You’re welcome,” I said.
“Listen,” he started to say, but he seemed like he wasn’t sure how to word what he wanted to say next. “I’m sorry about the other night. I should have done a lot of things differently,” he said.
“Don’t worry about it. I understand. We both have a lot of things that we’re dealing with,” I said. And in a move that
was a little bolder than I was used to, I kissed him on the cheek.
I got into my car and drove away before the perfect moment could be ruined.
Chapter 17
James
The first thing I did when I woke up, was go check on Nell. I went into her room and was surprised to see that she was already awake.
“How are you feeling, sweetheart?” I asked her.
“I’m feeling much better,” Nell said.
I gave my daughter a hug, “I’m glad to hear that.”
“What’s for breakfast, Daddy?” Nell asked.
“I’m not sure,” I said, just as there was a knock on the front door. “Hold on a second,” I said and headed to answer the door, wondering who it was. Who could be there at this time on a Saturday morning? We didn’t get many visitors. Both of my parents lived on the other side of the country, and Whitney’s parents hadn’t really been around since she passed away.
I opened the door and was surprised to see Rachel standing there holding a box of donuts, coffee, and chocolate milk, that I assumed was for Nell.
“Hey. I wasn’t expecting to see you today,” I said, reaching out to grab the box of donuts from her, and stepping aside so she could come in.
“Yeah. I thought I’d come by to check on Nell and surprise you guys with some breakfast,” she said. “I hope it’s okay.”
“Donuts, are you kidding? Of course, it’s okay!” It warmed my heart that she took the time out of her morning to come check on Nell when she didn’t have to. She had no other attachments to Nell, and it was the weekend. Which we both had off unless there was a showing.
“Rachel!” Nell yelled as she came running in. She threw her arms around Rachel, almost knocking her over, as I grabbed the coffee’s just-in-time.
“Hi, Nell. You seem to be feeling better,” Rachel said.
Nell smiled brightly, “I am feeling better. You brought donuts? Is the chocolate milk for me?”
Rachel nodded her head, “Yes, ma’am.”
We walked over to the kitchen table, and I grabbed some paper plates from the cupboard. I opened Nell’s chocolate milk and held the donut box so she could see.
“Which donut would you like?” I asked her.
Nell said, “I want the sprinkled one,” she said, pointing to the donut with pink frosting and sprinkles.
“Okay,” I said, lifting the donut from the box and putting it on the plate in front of her.
“Thank you, Rachel,” Nell said.
“You are very welcome. I’m just glad you’re feeling better. I was worried about you last night,” Rachel said.
I loved how much Rachel genuinely seemed to care about Nell. But I often wondered why she cared so much about a little girl that was not related to her in any way. It just made me want to know her story even more. Don’t get me wrong: I loved that she cared so much about Nell, but I’d never seen someone without children care so much about a child before.
“You really didn’t have to do this, Rachel,” I said.
Rachel smiled, “I know, but I wanted to.”
I loved her smile. It seemed like it radiated through the whole room. I just wanted to see more of it. I wanted to be the one to make her smile. I knew that much.
“Can we all spend the day together?” Nell asked.
“How ‘bout it Rachel? Would you like to spend the day with us?” I asked her.
“I’d like that a lot.” Rachel said.
After breakfast, we decided to go to the park. It was the perfect day for it, the weather was nice, and I knew it would do Nell some good to get some fresh air. We went to the park down the street from our house so we didn’t have to drive and would be nearby if Nell ran out of steam. The three of us walked together down the street to the park. When we got there, Nell took off running for the swings.
“Rachel! Look how high I can go!” Nell yelled. It was nice to see how happy and excited she was.
Laughing, Rachel replied, “Wow, that’s so high! Be careful,” she said, humoring Nell. I thought it was nice that she was doing that.
A few minutes later, and after Nell wasn’t swinging so high anymore, she yelled for Rachel to come over and push her. Rachel walked over and helped push her on the swing. The two of them laughed and played together, and it was the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen before.
I tried not to think about Whitney; it wasn’t the time or the place, but it was hard not to. I still wished that she was here to play with Nell herself. That she was here to see our little girl grow up. But at least for the time being, Nell had someone that could be a mother figure to her.
Smiling, I watched the two of them. Rachel helped Nell get down from the swing, and they raced over to the playground. Rachel clearly let Nell win, and Nell was laughing very loudly the entire time.
They went up to the top of a slide, and when Nell said that she was a little nervous, Rachel put her on her lap, and the two of them went down the slide together. But, they weren’t expecting me. I jumped out just as they hit the bottom and scared them both. The three of us were laughing out loud now.
After Nell had played at the park for what seemed like forever, I suggested we go get ice cream. We walked back to the house, and the three of us got into my car, and I drove to a little ice cream shop downtown. It wasn’t very well known, but it had the best handmade, homemade ice cream ever. Nell and I often went there after doctor or dentist visits, and things like that.
“Have you ever been here, Rachel?” I asked her.
Rachel shook her head. “No, I don’t think I have.”
“Well, you’re in for a treat,” I said to her.
I shut the car off, and Rachel helped get Nell out of the backseat of the car. We walked inside and up to the counter where we ordered our ice cream. Nell chose a banana split like she often did, I went with two scoops of chocolate in a waffle cone with chocolate chips mixed in, and Rachel chose a scoop of strawberry and a scoop of chocolate on a waffle cone, with gummy bears mixed in.
We got our ice cream and headed out to a table that was right outside the front door. I thought it would be better to sit outside since it was such a nice day.
“Thank you for this,” Rachel said to me.
“No, thank you for everything. I mean it. Everything you’ve done for both Nell and me. It really means a lot,” I said to her.
Nell was struggling with her ice cream, and I watched as Rachel reached over and cut the bananas up for her.
“Thank you, Rachel,” Nell said, then she dug back into her ice cream. Using her spoon, she picked up a giant spoonful of banana and ice cream and shoved it into her mouth.
“Nell, don’t do that,” I said, with a laugh.
We watched as Nell chewed on the giant bite of banana and ice cream that she currently had in her mouth. Ice cream was dripping down her face. I went back inside and grabbed a stack of napkins, then handed them to Nell.
“Clean up your face,” I said.
Rachel and Nell were laughing as Nell cleaned up her face.
After we finished eating our ice cream and cleaned up our mess, we got in the car and drove home. Nell wanted to watch a movie with us, so when we got back to my house, Nell ran to her room and chose the movie Frozen. I’d seen it at least three dozen times, and that had been more than enough. But I wanted to appease my daughter, so I put the movie on for her, and the three of us settled on the couch.
“Have you seen this before?” I asked Rachel.
“No, actually I haven’t.” Rachel said.
“Well, hopefully this is the only time you have to watch it,” I said in a stage whisper.
“Hey!” Nell said, and the three of us laughed.
The movie started, and I offered to make the popcorn, and asked Rachel to come along to help.
I grabbed a bowl and a bag of popcorn, which I tossed into the microwave, then turned to face Rachel.
“So, I’ve been wondering,” I started. But I found I was more nervous than I had been expecting. �
��What did you mean the other day when you said we both have a lot of things to deal with?” I asked her.
“Well, I have a past too,” she said. “I don’t want to ruin what we have going on by going into heavy details right now. I feel like maybe it’s a conversation for another day.”
I liked her honesty. She wasn’t trying to hide anything from me, and I appreciated that. She acknowledged the validity of my question and her willingness to answer it. There weren’t many people in my life that I felt I could trust like that.
“You know, if Nell is going to spend the night at her friend’s house again next weekend, maybe we can get together,” I said to her.
“I’d really like that,” Rachel said with a smile.
I was grinning, and I felt the urge to kiss her. I just wanted to grab her and pull her into me, then press my lips against hers. I wanted to feel her lips on mine, and her body in my arms. The desire within me was so strong, but I also didn’t want to scare her off. It was a slippery slope. This was only the beginning of our friendship, and we hadn’t really known each other that long. I really wasn’t sure where we were headed, and all I knew at that moment was that I really liked spending time with her, and I loved the way she interacted with my daughter.
The popcorn finished, and I opened the microwave door, grabbed the bag, and dumped it into the bowl.
“Rachel, will you grab the pretzels from the cupboard?” I asked her.
“Sure,” She said and opened the cupboard and found them. I led her back out to the living room where Nell was still peacefully watching the movie.
The three of us watched and nibbled the snacks though weren’t really hungry. When the movie ended, we let Nell choose another movie. It was another Disney princess movie of course, but we didn’t mind since she liked them so much. I was enjoying the relaxing time the three of us were spending together, so it didn’t matter to me what we watched.
“Can Rachel stay for dinner?” Nell asked.
I looked at Rachel but didn’t say anything. I wasn’t going to answer for her.
Rachel looked at Nell, “I’d love to stay, if it’s okay with your dad, that is.”
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