Kachaan: Just checking in. How was the gig? Weekend going alright? Really just wanted to make sure you weren’t feeling foggy or needing company.
Me: Gig was great! It felt really good to be at the Blue Note again. I’m townside. Not foggy, doing really good actually.
Kachaan: Glad to hear it! I love you, Lani!
When I come out, Ames is stretched out on the bed in only shorts and I waffle, not sure what I should do. I feel very exposed since I only pulled on Ames’ undershirt. I should have put on actual clothes. But Ames isn’t fully dressed… I wish it wasn’t this hard for me to decide things, but I’ve come to accept that it’s who I am. I’m good at a number of things, but that is not one of them. I end up sitting cross-legged next to him, feeling awkward and slightly uncomfortable, but committing to my choice. We get through a third of the episode that way before he sits up and arranges pillows to recline the way he was at the pool. Without ever looking away from the show, he pulls me into his lap, settling me between his legs and pulling me back onto his chest. He moves my damp hair to one side and murmurs, his warm breath tickling my ear, “much better.” It is. His hands explore, always toeing the line of what would take us to a new place. His fingers brush the edge of my breast, making my nipples harden. He runs his hands softly down my sides, his fingers skimming the edge of the T-shirt and my bare thighs. My breath is shaky, so he has to know what he’s doing to me and I can feel, against my ass, what I’m doing to him. Such clear signs that he’s into me makes me feel amazing.
Maybe I wasn’t bold enough to climb into the shower with him, but I can be bold enough for this. I turn slightly, tipping my chin up and back. The swivel is enough to move my breast directly under his wandering hand and I inhale sharply as his fingers run over my hard peak. I slide the tip of my tongue along his sharp jaw, then he brings his mouth down onto mine. His fingers brush ever so lightly over my other nipple, and I sigh into him. He takes the opening, licking lightly. His tongue is warm, and he tastes sweet. He’s slow, tender even.
I expected, with our position and the touching, that he’d be hurried, impatient, but he’s the opposite. He keeps touching me lightly, teasingly. He brings his hand up, along my throat and lays my head back against his shoulder as he deepens the kiss. Tingling heat spreads across my skin and I run my fingers along his strong jaw. It stays slow and gentle. Sensual. I feel the kiss everywhere. I’ve never been kissed like this before. It feels deeper than a mere touching of our mouths.
I don’t even know how long we stay that way before he finally breaks the kiss, bringing his face down into the crook of my neck. He trails small kisses on my skin, holding me close. Even now it doesn’t feel like he’s trying for more. I want him to, but I’m also swooning over how he’s handling this. He kisses under my ear, his tongue lightly running along the sensitive spot, and I move against him.
“You feel so good. Everything with you feels good,” he whispers into my skin.
I murmur something in agreement as I spin around, draping my legs over his thighs so I can face him. He’s nibbling his lip and I reach out, tracing it with my fingers. He slides his big hands up my thighs and underneath the t-shirt he lent me, exposing my panties. Resting them on my waist, his fingers splay so his thumbs are skirting the underside of my breasts. It’s maddening how much it’s not enough.
“Obviously, you know I want more than this.” He barely rocks into me to emphasize his point, his hard length brushing against me and making me whimper with need. He kisses me again and now his tongue is more insistent. My entire body feels alight. His thumbs are still skimming the bottom edge of my breasts and it’s driving me crazy. I want more. I need more. He’s talking into my mouth, pausing between every few words like he’s sampling a dessert.
“You want this too?” I respond by rocking my center along his cock. He groans into my mouth. “You can’t do that, or I won’t be able to think straight.”
“Who says I want you thinking at all?” Oh my word, who am I right now?
“Well,” he presses against me just enough to make me gasp, “I have something I want to run by you.”
I can barely think. “What’s that?”
“I think we should get married.”
Everything, my body and my mind, freezes. Am I having a stroke? There’s no way he just said what I think he said. I’m still trying to come to terms with the fact that a guy as good looking, kind, and successful as Ames could be attracted to me, there’s no way in hell he just morphed into the Disney princess of naval officers, proposing marriage after one encounter.
“Hear me out, Nalani. I’ve been thinking about this the whole weekend. I didn’t really intend to blurt it out like that, but this wasn’t a random idea brought on by how much I want to keep kissing you, possibly until the end of time.” He finishes that statement by turning me into a puddle of goo with the persuasive power of his lips and tongue. I mean, when he does that, it’s easy to agree that we should keep kissing until the end of time. I don’t mind being selfish like that. Except, I can feel my eyes widening again as my heart rate picks up, what is he even talking about? This is crazy, right?
“Darlin’?” I look back up at him, blinking slowly. “I probably should have eased you in some.” I breathe deeply, working to keep myself from spiraling into a total overwhelmed meltdown. “Are you still with me?” I nod shakily. “I’m going to stay here, like this. I want to tell you my plan, what I’ve been thinking about. You can stop me any time. But I hope you’ll hear me out.” I nod again, my fingers drumming involuntarily on his bare shoulders as they shake. It could be nerves, but I’m also still really, really turned on. God, it’s so weird inside my body right now.
“Can I ask, have you enjoyed this weekend as much as I have? Because I kind of don’t want it to end.” That’s an easy one. I answer with my tongue slipping around his, the physical sensations connecting me to the moment so I can’t drift away. I don’t even want to admit it, but I’m intrigued by the idea of marrying him, by the thought of Ames continuing to care for me, making me feel special and desired, for longer. I don’t care how selfish that makes me, I don’t want to lose this feeling. He tries to adjust himself, subtly, but ends up rubbing against me and he feels so good I sigh into his mouth.
“I’ve really enjoyed this weekend.” I’m not even trying to adjust, I simply rock into him, distracted by his closeness and how alive he makes me feel. “But it’s not normal. I don’t know how I should be feeling. And I never get this comfortable this quickly.” Calloused fingers are running over my skin and it’s all I can do not to drop my head back, losing myself in the sensations while ignoring the conversation we need to be having.
“It’s the long, unconventional date,” he murmurs. “We’ve been together for something like 40 hours straight.”
His fingers are no longer skimming the underside of my breasts, his hands spanning them and squeezing gently while I’m touching every inch of skin I can reach. I haven’t had a single worry about how I look or if I’m annoying him or what I might be doing wrong. Ames looks at me and I can see everything, right there, in his eyes, open and honest. He’s safety and caring, desire and longing, gentleness and consideration. And we’ve gotten lost again.
“Ames?” He pulls back from nibbling at my neck, blue eyes hazy with desire. “Were you going somewhere with this?”
“Uh, yeah. Health insurance. I have excellent health insurance. And also, I want much, much more of this. Do you want more of this?”
“Yes.”
“Do you want to work out the details of us getting married later?”
“Yes.”
“To getting married, or talking about the details later?”
“Yes.”
13
Ames
I slide my hands down and pull my white undershirt over her head. I didn’t think I could get any harder but seeing her bared before me does something to me. I drag her against my cock, claiming her breast with my mouth. She arches against m
e, and I bite down gently, making her groan. Eventually I work my way over to her other breast, and she’s running her hands through my hair, tugging lightly as I nibble. I lay her back and kiss my way down her body. This isn’t going to work where we are. There isn’t enough room. I hop up and she looks at me with disappointment.
“I thought we were going to…”
“Oh, we are. We most definitely are. You first, Darlin’.” I pull her to the edge of the bed, dragging her panties down her legs. I stand for a moment, drinking in the sight of her. “Wow. I mean, holy shit, you’re beautiful.” I slide my hands up her thighs, parting them for me. She’s looking down at me, a little tremble in her lip, her fingers twisting the sheet. “Nalani, is this ok?”
“I’ve just never…um…”
“No guy has ever done this for you?”
“No,” she whispers.
“Fucking idiots.” Dropping to my knees in front of her, I see the slight shake in her legs, her nerves. “Can I?” She gives me a shy nod. I lick and kiss my way up her leg, pausing over her center. “I really want you, Nalani. I’m going to make you feel so good and I’m going to love every fucking second of it. Don’t be afraid to show me what you like, ok?” I lick deeply, from bottom to top, groaning against her. “You taste fucking amazing.” I lap at her clit, and she moans. I close my eyes and tune in to her tiny movements and sounds, changing how I’m touching her based on her reactions. First her legs relax and fall open, then her back arches, short breaths panting out. I love knowing that I’m making her feel this way. She’s writhing against me, her hips coming up off the mattress to meet my mouth.
“Don’t stop,” she moans.
“Never,” I murmur against her. My voice against her sensitive nerves has her jerking upward. I suck her into my mouth, keeping a constant steady pressure, and hum against her. Her body bucks upward, straining against me and she explodes, gasping out in the sexiest little cries. I run my tongue lightly up and down, not wanting to be done tasting her, then I slide up her body to kiss her. She kisses me deeply, the passion coiling in my core and heat spreading throughout my body.
“Oh, Ames, that was…” she shakes her head, closing her eyes and smiling dreamily.
“Delicious.” I tell her, licking my lips.
“We’re not done, are we?” She looks down at my body. My cock definitely takes notice.
“Not by a long shot.”
“Well then, get in here.” I stand up, stripping off my shorts. She stares, then scoots to the edge of the bed, taking me in her hand. “Do you think we’ll fit as well here as we have everywhere else?” She squeezes and strokes me firmly from base to tip and my eyes drop closed.
“Mmmm, I have no doubts.” I look down at her and she leans over, running her tongue around the head and sucking me into her mouth. My muscles clench involuntarily, my entire body reacting to the sensations of her mouth on me. I have to pull back. “That feels too good. No more.” She grins at me and beckons with her fingers. I lower my body onto hers and she pushes me onto my back, climbing on top of me. I did not expect her to take control and it is hot. I watch as she slowly lowers herself onto me, inch by inch. It feels perfect. When I’m all the way in, she rotates her hips slowly. I groan. It’s overwhelming, the connection.
“I knew we’d be good together. You were made for me, Darlin’.” I let her set the pace, running my hands up her body while she rides me. She leans back a little and I reach down to circle her clit.
“Oh, fuck,” she groans, “how can I be close again?” She brings her body down against mine, chest to chest, still moving to take me in deep.
“It’s been a couple years for me. I know I can’t last as long as I want to. You’re too fucking sexy, and this all feels too perfect.”
“Well, we’ll make sure we last longer next time.” She’s kissing me, circling her hips, rocking back against me, and it is all doing it for me. “Can you come with me?” Her big hazel eyes are staring into mine and my release has been building fast.
“I’m right there.” I push up, hard.
“So good,” she moans. I thrust up into her a few more times and I’m crashing. She tightens against me and we’re both coming undone together. I wrap my arms around her, holding her close to me through the aftershocks. She’s kissing me, a tangle of messy tongues and swollen lips.
“Fuck. I never want to stop kissing you.” I nuzzle against her neck, not wanting to be disconnected in any way. She mumbles something incoherent. “Shit. We didn’t use protection. I’ve never done that. Ever. I’m so sorry, Nalani!”
“We’re good,” she mumbles. “Birth control.”
I let out a shaky breath. “I don’t want to let you go. Can we finish our conversation from before?” She nods, keeping her eyes closed. “Ok, here’s where I’m coming from. I like you, Nalani. Three dates or one date or something in between, this is the best date I’ve ever been on. I’m actually not looking forward to going back to normal life where I might get to see you on a weekend, if I’m lucky. I don’t want this to end. And I was thinking that before we had sex. I’m feeling that even more now.”
She shakes her head in agreement. “I’m not sure this is fair. I feel like I might agree to anything after that.”
“Maybe that was my plan.” She cocks an eyebrow at me. “It wasn’t really, but in retrospect I almost wish I had been that level of evil genius.” Her laugh is low, almost weary. “The other consideration is the breast cancer thing.” She stiffens and I run my hands down her back. “I know, I know, it’s not something you want to think about. Wanna know something I’m really good at? Facing things head on and making decisions. It’s kind of like my superpower. What if you could borrow my superpower? And also, while you’re at it, we could spend as much time together as we want? Like this first date, multiplied. AND, while we’re doing that, you could have access to really good insurance benefits?”
She’s watching me carefully and she hasn’t retreated, mentally. “Are you with me on those first two points? I want more time with you, and you need my insurance. Right?” She nods. “Then there’s the weirdness brought on by the marathon date. I think the marathon date could have been easier to approach, mentally, if we had established our own set of rules, some boundaries. We were using regular date rules but nothing about this is regular. Let’s apply that logic — we make our own rules. We decide what we’re comfortable with, how it will all work, how long we’ll try. We agree, then we both know where we stand, and everyone feels safe and heard. We get to marathon date, like this, but longer term. However long we decide, say a year. You get my benefits. You can get the screening and whatever else you need to start considering what your future and your health should look like. I’ll lend whatever support you want or need there. But the one sticking point, the one thing that has to happen in order for all of this to work is this: we have to get married.”
“Why marriage?” She’s coming out of the orgasm haze a little, eyes less hazy.
“We can’t pretend to be married and have this work. You need to be in the system, under my name, all official. We’re not going to commit insurance fraud.”
“But isn’t pretending to be a couple, even with a real certificate, still fraud?”
“Technically, maybe. But no one is going to be checking up on us. And no one will be able to prove or disprove the validity of our relationship. Plus, I’m really hoping we won’t be pretending to be a couple. Legally we’ll be a married couple. In reality, we’ll be together, trying this out for real — going on dates, spending time together, all that good stuff. But the main thing is you can stop putting off taking care of yourself.”
“And what happens at the end of whatever time period we decide on?”
“We make the rules, we decide. If, at the end, we’re feeling like it’s not working, like it’s the point when we might break up if we were simply dating, then that’s what we’ll do. No harm, no foul. Or, you know, we could stay together.”
“We’ll h
ave a contract?”
“Absolutely.”
She’s chewing on her lip and absentmindedly running her fingers along my arms. I want more of that — the casual affection, the caring that happens without thought.
“You don’t have to decide now. Think about it. And ask me questions as they occur to you. We can still watch Murder, She Wrote, nap, order dinner, talk, everything we were going to do anyway. If you decide you’re in, we can do it tomorrow. I took the day off. But no pressure. Even if you don’t want to do it, I’m still hoping you’ll want to see me again, after this weekend.”
She leans forward, soft lips brushing mine and I can’t resist kissing her a little longer.
“I still want to see you. For sure. A lot. After this, I mean. No matter what we decide. Right now, could we cuddle? And watch the show?”
“Definitely. I am a master cuddler.” I prop up on the pillows and pull her into my chest, hoping she gives it some real consideration and ecstatic that she’s willing to do it in my arms.
14
Nalani
Proposing marriage was literally the last thing I expected from Ames. I think the finger bone jewelry thing was more likely than wanting to marry me 40 hours after asking me to hang out. I want to think it through carefully, but that’s not my strong suit. Especially not after two orgasms. I feel like my brain is mush. Delicious, beyond satisfied mush. I just had the best sex of my life with the hottest guy I’ve ever seen. Plus, he laid everything out very methodically and calmly. I have all the information I need, lined up as neatly as they would be with color-coded notecards and stuff.
Like a Good Wife (Oahu Naval Officers Book 2) Page 6