by Twyla Turner
“Can she stay until I pass out?”
“Sure.” She said before walking out.
Already Mack’s eyes were getting heavy. He felt Royal’s fingers on his shoulder again. Her thumb stroked him gently. Mack rolled his head to the side and grinned at her goofily.
“You saved me. You’re my angel.”
Royal smiled, “Just get some rest.”
“You’re beautiful,” he heard his words slur. “Pleasssh come back.”
“I will.”
He closed his eyes and drifted off with a smile.
Chapter Nine
“You’re beautiful.”
Mack’s words repeated themselves as Royal got herself together the next day for work. She smiled, and then sighed at herself for being such a sap. The man was half out of his mind when he’d said it.
But maybe like alcohol, the pain meds act as a truth serum.
Royal rolled her eyes at herself as she walked into her bedroom to get dressed for work. She hadn’t been in since the ‘incident’ with Devon and the accident. She hadn’t had any photoshoots scheduled until today. She’d used the last few days to make a very big decision. She’d finally settled on a choice that was best for her and her career, and her alone.
It was already a foregone conclusion that whatever it was she and Devon had together was over. Royal probably would’ve cried about it if it weren’t for the accident. Witnessing the crash and watching a man almost die, put her life into prospective. She didn’t have all the time in the world to be with someone who made her feel like less.
What hurt the most about the situation wasn’t Devon. It was how no man seemed to want her in their life long term. At least not for more than a friend. It was hard to stay confident in the woman she knew she was and saw in her reflection every day, in the face of how men apparently saw her.
“The fuck!? Do I have halitosis and just don’t know it?” Royal asked herself before blowing her breath in her cupped hand to smell it.
She shook her head and finished getting ready. Black leggings, an electric blue hi-lo tank top, and black Converse made up her work attire for the day. She had a photo shoot for Diesel scheduled, so she loaded up her Jeep with her camera equipment and headed to Golden Gate Park where the shoot would be located.
As the day progressed, and drew closer to Royal seeing Devon when she got to the office, the accident took a backseat to what happened that night at Devon’s house. She hadn’t been able to think about it with her mind preoccupied about Mack. Now that she’d seen him and knew he was going to be okay, Royal’s fury over what Devon had done boiled just under the surface.
Royal was a laidback, easygoing person. She rarely ever got pissy with anyone. So, the fury churning inside of her was distracting, to say the least. Through it all, she tried her best to focus on the shoot. She took some phenomenal photos, dealt with unruly high winds, and calmed down a cat fight between two male models with diva tendencies by the time the day was over.
When she entered the floor that Diesel magazine was located on, late that afternoon, Royal had finally gotten her rage under control. That is, until she saw Devon and the guilty look that came across his face.
He looked around with trepidation. Fear that she’d lose it on him in the middle of the office was written all over his face. Quickly, he waved her towards his office. Royal clenched her jaw and followed. She walked in after him and Devon shut the door to curious eyes and ears.
“Royal, look-”
“Don’t.” Royal said quietly, interrupting him. “Don’t even split your lying lips to try to save yourself. There is nothing you can say that will make this better or less humiliating.”
Devon looked down at the floor in response.
“Tell me, how long have you been with her?”
“Three years.”
Motherfucker! Royal screamed in her head.
Outwardly, she squeezed her lips together and nodded her head. Then, she announced her decision.
“I quit,” she said softly.
“What? You can’t quit! I need- We need you.” Devon corrected after she shot him with a look of pure hatred.
“Hmm…” Royal hummed as she cocked her head to the side, clasped her chin, and looked up as if she was deep in thought. “I needed a man who was actually single. I needed a man who wouldn’t turn me into a side-piece. I needed a man who was giving in bed.” She paused for a second and channeled Mia. “No. Better yet. I needed a man who was actually good in bed. I needed a lot of fucking things, for which I did not get. So, I fail to care what you fucking need!
“Here’s my SD card with all the photos from today and past shoots for Diesel. Good luck and congratulations on your upcoming nuptials.” Royal handed him the memory card and turned to walk out.
“We have several shoots scheduled this week and next. And you’re going to leave without notice? That’s not very professional and would be frowned upon by your next potential employer. And the magazine publication industry is a close knit one,” Devon threatened.
Royal paused with her hand on the doorknob. This asshole! She slowly turned back to him.
“Excuse me? Are you threatening me?”
“You’re not leaving me much choice, Ro.”
“Don’t call me that. Only people I care about can call me that.” Royal started to walk towards him and Devon backed up until he hit his desk. “You’re going to tell anyone that asks, that I gave you my notice two weeks ago. You can also tell them that I went freelance to lend my talent to other publications and companies. You’re also going to tell them that I’m the best damn photographer that you’ve ever worked with and that they’d be crazy not to hire me. To do otherwise, would be to prepare for more humiliation than you’ve ever experienced. And a lawsuit that would leave you destitute.
“You can say goodbye to Kelly Kapowski.”
“Kate.”
“Whatever. When you lose everything, you won’t have a Kate. And every single one of your colleagues will find out that you have a mediocre crooked dick after I forward them all of the dick pics you sent me.” Royal stood up on her tiptoes to gain a few inches in height, jabbed her finger in his chest, and reached almost nose to nose with him. “Try me and I’ll ruin you.”
Devon swallowed.
“That’s what I thought.”
Royal quickly turned on her heel and strode from his office.
~~~
“You didn’t?!” Kennedy exclaimed as Royal retold the story about her day.
She had called an impromptu meeting with the girls at her house. They were all gathered around her kitchen table made of reclaimed wood eating the Thai food she’d ordered. As always, offering their support.
“I am so proud of you, hermana.” Mia placed a hand on her heart. “It brings a tear to my eye.”
“You should be. In order to get through it, I had to channel you a couple times.” Royal informed her with a grin.
“Me?!” Mia said excitedly. A glow of pride spread across her face.
“Yes, you. How else was I going to be able to tell him that he sucks in bed and has a mediocre, crooked dick?” Royal raised an eyebrow.
“I feel like Mr. Clark in Lean On Me. Or even better! Pai Mei in Kill Bill when Black Mamba was able to punch that piece of wood without flinching. Ooh! Or Mr. Miyagi!”
“I think we get the point,” Payton stopped Mia’s rambling.
“So, what now?” Kennedy asked.
“I go freelance and work on my Curvy Love photo series. I’ve already emailed some of my contacts to let them know I’m now available for hire. I’ll be contacting more tomorrow.” Royal informed them.
“Then I’d say, you’ve got this.” Kennedy reached across the table and squeezed her hand.
“I do.”
Royal smiled at her friends. She was nervous for what the future held without a guaranteed paycheck. But at the same time, it felt like a weight had been lifted from her chest. She could breathe easier knowing she was callin
g the shots and now free from a toxic relationship.
You’ve so got this.
Chapter Ten
“Hey, Royal!” A nurse she recognized greeted her.
Royal tried to remember her name and was relieved when she spotted it embroidered on her scrubs.
“Hey, Nurse Carmen.”
“You might want to give it a few minutes. Mack is in the middle of getting his sponge bath,” Carmen informed her.
“Oh…”
Visions of her hands soaping up hard muscles danced before Royal’s eyes.
“Exactly.” Carmen nodded before dropping her voice to a whisper. “And you didn’t hear it from me, but everyone has been fighting over who’s going to give him one next. We finally had to settle it with Rock, Paper, Scissors.”
Royal covered her mouth with her hand in an attempt to stop her snort/laugh.
“Trust me. That’s rare. RNs don’t really give patients sponge baths. Our CNAs do. Most of the time we’re fighting over not giving someone a bath.”
A few moments later, the nurse who had apparently won for the day walked out of Mack’s room with a grin on her face that looked like the kid who got in the cookie jar. Royal watched her as she walked up to a few of the other nurses and fanned herself. They all responded with varying versions of ‘You suck.’
“You’re free to go in now,” Carmen jerked her chin towards the door.
“Okay. Thanks.”
Royal walked up to the door and gave it a light knock before peeking her head inside.
“Hey, Royal!” Mack’s face lit up.
Royal prayed it was for more than just platonic reasons that he looked so excited to see her.
“Hey, Mack.”
“I’m digging what you’re wearing. It’s cute and sexy,” he said after she walked into his room.
Royal looked down at herself. She wore a gray t-shirt dress, slightly ripped fishnets, athletic socks pulled up to her knees, and combat boots.
“Really?”
“Yeah. You’re good at that.”
“Good at what?”
“Being cute and sexy at the same time.”
Royal felt her face heat. His eyes were intense and seemed to eat her up. She looked away.
“So…how ya feeling?”
“Not terrible. Not great. And a little dry.”
“A little dry?”
“They bathe you, but they don’t moisturize you when they’re done.”
“You moisturize?” Royal blinked in shock.
“I might be a firefighter, but I do fitness modeling on the side.” Mack paused and his face fell a bit. “Well, I was a firefighter, and I did fitness modeling. I learned early on, after being scolded by photographers, to put lotion on because no one wants to photograph or see dry skin. It’s become habit.”
“Good advice,” Royal said as she walked over to sit in the chair next to his bed.
“Speaking of careers. What do you do, Royal?”
“I’m a photographer.” She grinned.
“Ah. So, you know what I’m talking about then.”
“I do. And they’re right. No one wants to see your ashy skin.”
They laughed.
“What do you photograph? People, landscapes, architecture?”
“People, mostly.” Royal sighed. “I was working for Diesel magazine for quite a few years. I actually took your advice and quit yesterday. I’m going freelance and praying it works out.”
“It will. And congratulations on quitting and going freelance! I’d high-five you, but…” Mack held up his casted and splinted arms.”
“You’re fine. And thanks,” Royal smiled.
“I’ve shot for Diesel before, ya know. I’m surprised you weren’t my photographer.”
“They have a few us on staff. But yeah, you would be a great subject to shoot.”
“Would have been,” Mack almost whispered.
“That wasn’t a mistake. My statement didn’t need correcting.”
Mack stared at her for a moment. Royal looked at him sincerely.
It was obvious that he was struggling with the loss of his leg. But to Royal it didn’t make him any less. He was still beautiful beyond words. Maybe, the only thing that had really changed was that he was actually more interesting now. The camera would love him. Royal hoped he’d let her photograph him in the future.
~~~
Royal’s last statement had been said with such sincerity and finality that Mack wondered if maybe everything would eventually be okay. Maybe photographers, advertisers, and companies would still want to shoot him.
Mack tried to remind himself that he was one of the lucky ones. It could’ve been far worse. He knew he had a long road ahead, but at least he knew that he would more than likely walk again.
It was Royal. Her positivity was infectious. Mack was curious about her. More than curious actually. He wanted to know everything about her.
“So, what’s your story, Royal?”
“My story?” Her brow scrunched up. “There’s not much to it really. Pretty boring stuff.”
“With your style, I can’t imagine anything about you is boring.”
“Hmm…what’s there to know? I grew up in Palo Alto.”
“Palo Alto?!? Then your family must do well for themselves.”
“They do, but that has nothing to do with me. They pretty much disowned me when I decided to no longer toe the line. My dad has helped me out a few times, like when I bought my place. But he had to hide it from my mother. Even though he’s the judge, she’s the matriarch of the family. She’ll make your life a living hell if you defy her. So, essentially, I’m her worst nightmare.” Royal smirked devilishly.
After toeing the line his whole life, Mack latched onto Royal’s story like a lifeline.
“What did she want you to be like?”
“Oh, just picture it. A brain surgeon for a brother. A lawyer for a sister who aspires to be a supreme court justice one day. And probably will be because she’s brilliant as hell. A highly successful judge for a father. My mother did get her MBA, but she only used it to run the family like a well-oiled business. And all of them graduated from Stanford and all of them are elite Stanford donors.
“So, imagine their dismay when I decided to go to ‘lowly’ Berkeley to get a degree in photography.” She rolled her eyes. “I loathed stuffy dinner parties. Wealthy people irritate me. I didn’t carry myself like a proper lady. I gained too much weight. And I hated dressing like a Stepford Wife.”
“How did you break away?” Mack asked.
He wasn’t sure if he was asking out of curiosity or as a blueprint for how to get out of being what everyone wanted him to be. Probably a little of both.
“I pretty much told them to fuck off in front of everyone at their fancy graduation/engagement party for my sister and brother. It was supposed to be my party too, but they were so embarrassed of me, my name was legit in fine print.
“It wasn’t my finest moment. But if you want to be free…you do what you gotta do.”
“Do you have anyone? A support system? Someone to share holidays with? Someone to share ups and downs with?” Mack asked.
He hated the thought of her having no one. Even though he was glad she didn’t have a man anymore.
What does it matter, you idiot? You do have someone!
“I have the family I chose. My sisters. There are four of us total. The Curvy Girls Club. We’re all we need. Well, one of us did find herself a wonderful man. He’s been adopted into the group as an honorary member.”
He envied the guy who’d been welcomed into her fold of friends. He needed a support system like that. He had the guys at the station, but he’d been play acting for so long, he wasn’t sure the guys would like the real him.
“I wish I could do what you did? I can’t even do it and my parents are dead.” Mack said as he picked at the blanket covering his leg and stump.
“Oh my God! I’m so sorry to hear that.”
“It�
�s okay. They died right before I graduated high school.”
“What happened?”
“It was a fire,” Mack swallowed. Time was never long enough to get over losing a parent, and definitely not at such an important age. No matter how difficult his home life had been.
“I wasn’t able to save them. When I woke up and realized there was a fire, I got on the floor and army crawled out of the house. When I got outside, I’d expected to see my parents. But they weren’t there. By the time I realized it though, I couldn’t get back inside to get them. Everything was engulfed in flames. I think it’s why I became a firefighter. I guess I’m trying to make up for failing my parents.” Mack cleared his throat, trying to dislodge the lump there.
“You didn’t fail them!” Royal reached out and lightly clasped his fingers. “You survived. I’m sure they preferred that.”
“Maybe.”
“Why do you wish you did what I did? Were you forced to be someone you’re not?”
“My whole life.”
Royal stayed quiet, but looked at him expectantly. She waited for him to continue.
Mack let out a harsh breath, “I was the star quarterback of the football team. My dad started on me when I was little and showed promise as an athlete. My parents were from Romania. They’re serious about training athletes there. I practiced, conditioned, and strength trained. I was the blond, green-eyed boy next door.
“I know. It sounds like the privileged white dude crying because he’s privileged. But that’s just the thing. I was virtually forced to be someone I was not. Forced to be what they thought they saw. I didn’t want to be the douchy idiot athlete.”
“What would you have preferred? Who did you want them to see?”
“I’ve let people decide for so long, I don’t even know anymore.”
Mack blinked in shock. It was the first time he’d said it out loud, let alone to anyone else.
“I can tell you what I didn’t like, though.”