I don’t blame her. I think I have a New York persona too.
And it only has one thing on her mind.
Sex.
I glance at Laz and almost ask him if he wants to come back to my room instead of going into the bar.
He looks like he wants to say something too.
“Laz!” Jane yells again.
He swallows, reluctantly tearing his eyes away from me and nods at Jane. “We’re coming.”
He gives me a smile that borders on apologetic and then starts pulling me toward the bar.
The place is called Tanner Smiths and is one of those trendy bars with a prohibition theme. It’s packed and dark and there’s a small dancefloor by the door so that when you walk in, you’re sucked into a group of people grooving all up in your space. Beyonce blares from the female DJ in the corner and everyone is drunk and happy.
“I approve of the vibe,” I say to Laz.
“What?” he yells back mockingly over the noise, cupping his ear. Then he leans in, close. Very close. “What you havin’ to drink, sweet girl?”
His breath is hot on my ear and I momentarily close my eyes, letting the feeling sink along my skin, down my back, all the way to my toes. “Anything,” I manage to say.
I open my eyes and his face is still at my neck, lips at my ear. “I had no idea you were so easy to please,” he murmurs and I swear his lips are grazing my skin. Goosebumps spread and I’m hot and cold all at once.
My throat feels thick as I speak. “Only when it comes to drinks. Anything else, you might have to work at it.”
“Is that so?” he says, pulling back enough to look me in the eye.
There’s fire inside him. God, how I want to burn.
“We’ll have to see, won’t we?” I tell him.
His languid gaze drops to my lips, his nostrils flaring with impatience.
Fuck, do it, just fucking kiss me.
Kiss me.
Kiss me.
He leans all the way back, gives my hand another squeeze before letting go. “Don’t you dare go anywhere.”
“Bossy,” I comment, my stomach summersaulting like crazy.
“You have no idea,” he says. Then he winks, a bit of a smile, and heads down to the bar to place the order.
I watch him. I watch him and I watch the girls in the bar watching him and I know tonight, tonight he’s mine. I have him.
I’ve never felt so alive before, a swarm of electricity underneath my skin, my heart happy, happy, happy with anticipation.
“Hey,” Jane says appearing at my side. She’s drunk but she’s pretty good at handling herself. I probably should be more drunk than I am but I’m just so excited that I’ve been taking it really slow.
“Hey. Where’s Naomi?”
“She’s talking to some guy over there.” She points into the crowd.
“That was fast.”
“I think she’s looking for her rebound tonight. I don’t blame her.”
“Me neither. Good for her. She needs to get laid.”
“She’s not the only one,” Jane says dryly. I glance at her and she’s reaching down into her purse. She pulls out a condom and puts it in the back pocket of my purse.
“What is that for?”
“For you,” she says. “In case you lose your V-card to my stepbrother tonight. Dude, I never thought I would say that phrase.”
“What are you talking about?”
Play dumb, play dumb, she’s on to you.
Jane crosses her arms. “Naomi told me about your fake dating thing.”
“Oh.”
“How is that going by the way?”
I give a faint shrug. “It’s been fun. I learned a lot about myself.”
“Like you’d rather date my brother than anyone else?”
“Jane. I’m not dating Laz.”
“I know but you’d like to.”
“What makes you say that?”
“Good grief. Marina, you were giving him the come hither eyes from day one.”
I sigh and look away. Laz is still down at the bar, trying to get the bartender’s attention.
“I don’t care, okay?” she goes on. “Seriously. You’re a grown woman and you know what you’re doing.”
I meet her eyes hesitantly. “What am I doing?”
“You like him. You more than like him. You’re in love with him.”
I scoff, though the words flame inside me.
I love him.
The feeling leaves me breathless.
I attempt to protest. “You can’t base that on what you’ve seen today.”
Because if she is, then that means I’ve been acting like a lovesick fool.
“I’m not. Naomi agrees with me.”
“Naomi is completely against this. Or whatever she thinks this is.”
“Because she hates men right now. Just let her be. She’s worried too. I was as well, but now I see the way Laz looks at you and I’m not going to stand in your way.”
I perk up. “What way does he look at me?”
“You know that scene in Pride and Prejudice?”
“The one we’ve watched over and over?” Back in college, Jane and I would literally watch that movie, the one with Keira Knightly, every Friday night and swoon and cry and wonder when we’d find our Mr. D’Arcy.
“Yes. By the lake. The way that he looks at her, like he’s bewitched, body and soul, that’s how Laz looks at you. And I know my brother has a terrible reputation when it comes to women and relationships but I honestly believe he has found something in you that he hasn’t been able to find with anyone else. You get a side of him that no one else does.”
I shake my head. “No,” I say quietly. “He still keeps that from me.”
“Give him time,” she says. “He’ll let you in.”
“How can you be so sure? What if…what if we end up being together and we break up. What if he pulls the same shit with me that he pulls with everyone else? I mean, I don’t even know why he does it, we never even got that far in our little dating game experiment before it…evolved. I know what’s wrong with me but…”
“Dude, there’s something wrong with everyone. Lazarus isn’t so special. People are fucked up and complicated and sometimes it’s just a matter of finding someone else as fucked up and complicated as you. Sometimes that’s all you need for love to work.” She takes a step back from me and makes the motion of dropping something. “Boom! Mic drop. Jane out.”
She turns around and heads to the dance floor, immediately twirling around a bunch of strangers like they’re all part of the same group.
“Need a drink?”
I turn to see a guy talking to me. He’s cute, dark blonde hair, scruffy beard, built like a linebacker. With his flannel shirt he looks like a lumberjack.
“Thank you but I’ve got a drink coming,” I say, pointing at the bar where Laz is taking two shots from the bartender. Great, Laz. Shots.
“Just wondered why a pretty girl like you was standing here all alone,” the guy says. “Didn’t seem right.”
I smile at him, flattered but a bit uncomfortable with the attention. I have no interest in this guy whatsoever but I don’t want to be rude either since not a lot of men hit on me in general.
“I’m doing good, I’m here with friends,” I tell him.
“What kind of friends?”
“Hiya,” Laz says appearing beside me with the shots. But though his usual greeting is easy, the look in his eyes is not. His gaze is hard and mean and fixed on the lumberjack with precision.
“Oh,” the lumberjack says. “I didn’t know…are you with her?”
“I’m with her,” Laz says, handing me my drink, then slipping his arm possessively around my waist. “She’s with me. As in, she’s mine, if you don’t get my meaning.”
The lumberjack balks. “Jeez, I get it dude. No harm no foul.”
He walks away to talk to the next girl and my heart is thundering against my ribs so hard I think they might br
eak.
I glance up at Laz in awe. Where the fuck did this alpha speak come from? I haven’t seen Laz claim anything in his life and he just fucking claimed me. I think I might need a cold shower already.
“It’s Jameson,” he says, nodding at the shot.
Are we going to completely just gloss over what happened?
“Thanks,” I say, my voice coming out in a squeak.
“Drink. Then we dance.”
“I don’t dance, Laz. You know this. And you’re really taking this bossy thing to heart.” I take a small sip.
“You’re too fucking cute,” he says. He shoots the contents of his glass right back and then nods at mine. “Catch up.”
I take in a deep breath because I don’t think I’ve done shots for years and then slam it back.
It burns but the feeling is nothing compared to the way I’ve been feeling all night. Actually, it feels nice to have the edge taken off, just a bit. I’m wound way too tight.
Laz plucks the glass from my hand and places it on the bar, then takes me over to the dance floor. He goes over and says something to the DJ, who nods. The songs have been slow of late but that still doesn’t take away from the fact that I don’t dance. I’m clumsy. I have no rhythm.
But Laz has all the rhythm in the world and he’s moving up against me, like he does when he’s doing a show. Only now I’m his stage that he owns, a stage he has complete control over.
It isn’t until the current song ends and then a slow familiar synth beat comes on that Laz slips his arms around me, pulling me to him. Tight. He sways to the sexy swagger of the song and leans in so his mouth is at my neck.
“I could corrupt you,” he sings, his deep, baritone voice washing over me like warm water, “in a heartbeat.”
He presses himself into my hip and I can feel how long and thick and hard he is.
It should make me nervous, scare me off.
But it doesn’t.
It sparks a need in me like never before.
“You’ll be calling out my name,” he sings again in time with David Gahan’s voice. At the moment I can’t even tell them apart, both are so rich and dripping with sex that it reaches deep inside of me, makes me want to take my clothes off right here on the dance floor. The press of his hard cock only seals the deal.
I want this man to corrupt me thoroughly.
“Did you request Depeche Mode?” I ask, my voice throaty, like it’s already anticipating everything to come.
“Maybe,” he murmurs. “Thought maybe I’d add Corrupt to the setlist.” He pauses and runs his lips down the length of my neck. “Though I’d have a hard time not wanting to fuck you every time I have to sing it.” He pauses. “I’m having the hardest time right now.”
I swallow, trying to find my breath while my heart is fluttering inside like a caged bird, desperate to be free.
Fucking hell.
He finally said it and it sounded sexier than I ever thought possible.
He finally said he wants to fuck me.
And I am more than fucking ready.
His lips slide down to my shoulder where he slowly brushes the thin straps of my dress and bra off and starts leaving long wet kisses and my hands go up, disappearing into his hair. Every muscle inside my body clenches.
He pulls back, enough for his hooded eyes to meet mine, raw lust burning behind them, the music and the alcohol and the years of pent up sexual frustration are combining to make me want to be stripped bare of every single inhibition.
I don’t know how long our eyes are locked like this. Our bodies are locked like this. Our hearts are locked like this. An eternity passes where all our unsaid words are passed between us like prayers.
“Sweet girl,” he whispers to me seconds before his mouth crushes mine.
I groan against his lips, his mouth hot and wet and hungry. This is a deep kiss, the kind of kiss you shouldn’t have on a public dance floor. It’s pulled out from a wild and charged place far inside me, a place I’ve always kept the bars on, keeping back my primal instincts like you would predators in a zoo.
I’ve never felt this kind of starvation before, you’d think I’d been deprived for him my whole life.
And I have been.
I’ve been deprived of everything, these kisses, this touching, so much.
So much.
But not anymore.
“Laz,” I gasp as I pull back, my heart a jackhammer as my eyes search his.
We should get a room.
Ask him to your room.
Ask him to go to the bathroom with you.
Fuck, do something!
“You’ve got such perfect lips,” he says, running his thumbs over them before leaning in and taking my bottom lip between his teeth, sucking, tugging. His breath is ragged, the heat coming off him is staggering.
My eyes roll back in my head, my patience a thin line ready to snap.
“I could kiss you for days,” he murmurs, his hands sliding down my back to my ass where he grabs hold.
“I think I would go mad.” I gasp, my fingers pressing hard into his taut shoulders. Somehow we’re still moving to the beat, yet it’s no longer the beat of the song but the beat of something we’ve created just between the two of us. An easy rhythm, like our bodies were built to move this way with each other.
God, is this what fucking him is like? Is it somehow better?
As if he can hear my thoughts, Laz pulls me closer. “By the way, I fuck better than I dance,” he whispers in my ear. “Better than I sing. Better than I write. Better than I do most things.” He brushes a swoop of hair off my shoulder and slowly licks up the side of my neck before his lips come together right behind my ear. “Bet you didn’t know that about me. How much I love to fuck and how good I am at it.”
Holy shit.
I try and swallow but can’t. I’m wordless. I’m on fire.
I guess I’ll have to take your word for it.
That’s the thing I would normally say.
But that’s not happening tonight.
I want to be shown.
I want to know for once exactly what he thinks of me.
Exactly what he wants to do.
I press my hand into his chest, pushing him back just enough to look him dead in the eye.
“Prove it.”
Marina
In Your Room
* * *
I can’t believe I said that.
Prove it.
Laz’s mouth twists into a smile. He bites his lip for a moment, studying me.
Then kisses me.
“I’m taking you to my room,” he says against my mouth.
My eyes widen.
It’s fine.
I’m Fine.
I can do this.
Oh my god.
I nod. “Okay.”
His smile widens. Cunning. Beautiful. I don’t care that he’s looking at me like he’s going to eat me alive. I want him to eat me alive.
Oh god.
Did I even shave?
He grabs my hand and leads me out of the bar.
The humid air hits us in the face the minute we step out onto the street. Everything in this moment feels more alive than normal, like all my senses are heightened in anticipation of what’s about to happen.
I’m squeezing Laz’s hand so tight, like I might get swept away down the street by an errant breeze, even though the hotel is literally next door. There’s just been too many opportunities that have been ruined by fate so far, I’m not chancing it.
“Should we have told Jane and Naomi?” I ask him as we walk through the lobby.
“None of their business,” he says, nodding at the front desk as we pass them.
He’s right. Even though I do have Jane’s condom in my purse. I hope he has a bunch because it would be too weird to use this one. He’d probably wonder why I have a condom to begin with and then I’d have to explain his stepsister gave it to me because she anticipated he’d fuck my brains out tonight.
Oh my god. He’s going to fuck my brains out.
I feel like I need to remind him again that I’m a virgin and this is my first time and I don’t know how much I’ll be able to take, if I’ll be any good, if…
But the moment the elevator doors open and he hustles me inside, he’s attacking me. Hands, lips, teeth, tongue. I’m pressed back against the mirror and his fingers wrap around the small of my waist, hoisting me up high. My legs go around his ass and I’m ready to fucking lose it, lose everything right here.
Then the elevator beeps, the door opens.
It’s the 8th floor.
His floor.
We smile at each other, both aware of this moment, that anyone could have been standing there, and he lowers me down to the ground like I’m just a feather.
I can barely feel my feet.
I can’t feel anything except each inch of skin he’s touched.
He grabs my hand, leads me down the hall.
I’m so nervous.
Each room we pass by, I think it could be his.
I feel like every person inside knows what’s happening out here. That my innocence and lack of experience is tangible, the lamb being led to the wolf’s den.
But Laz isn’t a wolf. He may have canines in his smile, he may have a sly, dark look to him at times. But despite it all, it’s still Laz. My Laz. A friend beneath all of this animal. And if I stopped him right here in the middle of the hotel hallway and told him I didn’t want to do this, he would understand.
He stops by his room, fumbles for his key. His hands are shaking.
Could he be nervous too?
The door opens.
I step inside first, inspecting the room like I’ve never seen it before, which is ridiculous because it looks exactly like my room, only the bed is on the other side.
For some reason, that makes my heart trip.
The bed. Made up by the maid while we’ve been out.
I can’t believe that’s where I’ll end up tonight.
Hell, you might not make it that far, my brain pipes up. He could fuck you against the wall like he almost did in the elevator, maybe on the floor.
Laz closes the door behind us with a soft click.
The sound brings my attention back to him.
I don’t think I can feel my feet anymore. I’m surprised I’m still standing.
Take Me To The Beach Page 42