“Please, Thea. Give me a chance to prove that she’s important before you cut me out completely.”
“I’m sorry.” Thea put her hands to her temples. “I’d never cut you out. I just don’t want Charlie to get hurt. I don’t want her to ever feel rejected.”
Rejected? Why would she think I’d reject Charlie? “I’d never reject her. I promise.”
Her gaze narrowed as she assessed my sincerity. My chest tightened, much like it had when Charlie had looked me up and down earlier tonight. I didn’t remember a time when I’d gone through such intense scrutiny. Not in college. Not in law school. My father, who was known for his ruthless critique, hadn’t inspected me this closely when I’d practiced my high school valedictorian speech for him.
These Landry women were stripping me bare.
“I want to believe you,” she said quietly. “I really do. But I don’t even know if you believe in yourself right now.”
I staggered back as if she’d slapped me. She saw right through me, didn’t she? She saw every flaw and insecurity. “You’re right. I don’t have the first clue what to do with Charlie. But I’ll figure it out over time.”
“Time? I thought you only had a week.”
“I’m coming back.”
“You’d better. If you make my daughter fall in love with you and then you leave her behind, I will find you and smother you in your sleep.”
I chuckled. Not many people challenged me. I liked that Thea didn’t back down. She met me with full force when we were fighting and when we’d had sex. I loved that she was especially scrappy when it came to our daughter. “I think you’d better hand over that vodka. You’re getting violent.”
She answered by grabbing the bottle and gulping down another shot. “You should see me when I drink bourbon. The last time I had Jim Beam, I decided to trim the shrubs along the sidewalk out front.”
“What shrubs?”
“Exactly.”
I laughed, picturing a drunken Thea going to town on some harmless greenery. “I met Hazel today.”
“She told me.” Thea handed over the bottle, our fingers brushing as I took it from her grip, and my pulse quickened.
This was dangerous, the two of us together in a cramped shed, drinking and letting the awkwardness melt away. I should say good night. I should go back to the motel and spend a couple of hours working. I should leave her here before I did something rash.
Instead, I took a drink.
Thea had this way of making me ignore should. She inspired me to throw out logic and prudence and obligation.
“So what’s next?” I asked, handing her the bottle. “Tell me what to do.”
She shrugged. “You have a week. I guess let’s start there. Charlie has a soccer game tomorrow night, and you’re welcome to come.”
“I’ll be there. Just text me when and where.”
She nodded. “We usually go out to dinner afterward. You’re welcome to join us.”
“Done.”
“No more talk about moving.” She pointed the bottle at my nose. “Don’t tell Charlie you’re thinking of buying a house here either. At least, not until she warms up to you. She’s scared she’s going to have to live in two places.”
Yes. Now we were getting somewhere. Much like in a difficult acquisition or tense merger negotiation, I always studied my opponents. I liked to know exactly who I was facing off with on behalf of my clients. Before I sat down at any conference table, I knew everything possible about the business my client was trying to buy—financial position, staff members, any previous legal troubles. And I knew even more about the opposing counsel. It wasn’t uncommon for me to take them out for a “get-to-know-you” lunch before we faced off.
It was ridiculous, comparing a soccer game and dinner with a five-year-old girl to my contract negotiation strategies. But I was desperate to get along with my daughter.
I waved Thea on. “Keep it coming.”
“Don’t make her any promise you can’t keep. Don’t let her silence scare you away. She listens more than she talks. Oh, and we can never argue in front of her. If she senses that we’re not getting along, she’ll pick a side and it won’t be yours.”
I grinned at the mental image of Charlie protecting her mother. I could relate to that feeling entirely. Something about Thea made me want to wrap her in my arms and never let go. “Anything else?”
She shook her head. “I’ll let you know what I come up with.”
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” She took a shot, then handed me the bottle to do the same.
We stood there in silence for a while, passing the vodka back and forth. The entire time, I studied Thea’s deep brown eyes. They were so bold and large, the color of dark chocolate. The night we’d spent together, I’d spent hours getting lost in her eyes as I’d moved inside of her.
Drunk and unable to fight the pull, I stepped away from the cabinet, holding her eyes as the space between us disappeared. I walked right into her space, trapping her against the table. The heat from her heaving breasts warmed the front of my shirt.
“Logan,” she whispered when I pressed even closer. “This is stupid.” Still, her hands came to my waist, gripping my shirt.
“You’re probably right. But I’m going to kiss you anyway.”
Thea
My entire body hummed as Logan pressed his hips closer. The hardness behind his jeans sent a wave of scorching heat to my core. I hadn’t been kissed in a really, really long time.
Why was this stupid? I couldn’t think of a reason. All of the worries and concerns I’d had in the kitchen after he’d stormed out were a hazy blur at the back of my mind. They vanished as my eyelids drifted shut, waiting for the soft brush of his lips.
The heat from his breath feathered across my cheek. He was so close I was dizzy. I gripped his shirt tighter, waiting for his mouth. He was almost—
“Wait.”
No! My stupid, tiny, infuriating brain. I should have had another shot or two. Maybe then, my good judgment wouldn’t have been able to reengage at the last second and send that awful word through my mouth.
I opened my eyes to see Logan had moved back, just an inch. Enough that I could make out the disappointment on his face.
“Sorry.” My shoulders sagged. “I want you to kiss me.”
“But?”
“But,” I dropped my hands from his shirt, “it will only complicate things even more.”
There were too many hurdles between us. Lifestyle. Geography. Responsibilities. Even drunk on vodka and Logan’s scent, the obstacles were just too big to ignore.
He grumbled under his breath and backed away, resuming his place against the cabinets. “Are you always this logical when you’ve been drinking?”
I smiled, glad he wasn’t angry. “No. Only when it comes to Charlie. She’s all that matters.”
“As disappointed as I am, she’s a lucky girl to have such a good mom.”
My heart swelled. Since the moment I’d held the positive pregnancy test in my hand, all I’d wanted was the best for my baby. I was proud to admit that despite having no guidance from my own biological mother, I was a good mom. Still, it meant the world that Logan thought so too.
He took a long breath and ran a hand through his hair. “I think I’d better go.”
“I’ll text you the details for the soccer game.”
“Thanks. Good night.” With a wave, he strode out of my workshop and into the night.
I counted to twenty, then rushed to the door, peeking around the side to see him walking down the street.
My house was only five blocks from the motel, three from the bar. I’d noticed earlier that he hadn’t driven over, so as he walked down the sidewalk, I took a long look at him from behind.
No woman in the world would look at Logan and not think he was gorgeous. Add to that his charisma, and he was mouthwatering.
And he’d wanted to kiss me.
Six years ago, I hadn’t hesi
tated a second when he’d asked me to spend the night with him. I’d let him whisk me away to his hotel suite for the best sex of my life.
But the Thea from six years ago was still learning. She hadn’t given birth to a little girl who would become her entire life.
Charlie had given me unconditional love and a real family, two things I’d craved my entire life. But the most important thing she’d given me was confidence. Because of her, I demanded more from life and more than I’d been given as a child.
I demanded more, so I could give it to her.
The Thea from six years ago would have let Logan kiss her senseless tonight. She would have taken that kiss and locked it away, cherishing the memory when she was alone.
Present-day Thea wanted more than a memory. She wanted a man who would kiss her every morning. A man who would kiss her before falling asleep every night. She needed a man who would share in the life she’d worked hard to build in Lark Cove.
The man disappearing around the block—the one who lived a world away—wasn’t him.
I woke up the next morning with a hangover. After Logan had left my workshop, I’d gone down to the dock to watch the sunset. I’d stupidly taken my vodka along.
I’d powered through the headache and nausea, getting Charlie ready for her day at camp with Hazel. With a kiss good-bye, I’d sent her on her way, then walked to work.
On days like this, working in a bar was a curse. I gagged at the smell of stale beer and the sight of liquor bottles made my stomach roll. How did Jackson come here with a smile on his face after a long night of drinking? I needed to learn his tricks if I was going to keep having vodka-soaked conversations with Logan.
I spent the morning in my office, doing paperwork and paying bills. I slugged down coffee and aspirin, willing my head to stop pounding. When we opened at eleven, I went out to the bar, where I spent the first hour breathing through my mouth so I wouldn’t puke.
Finally, around three o’clock, after the lunch crowd had left me to an empty room and the regulars had yet to come in for the evening, I braved some food and a Coke. By the time Wayne and Ronny came in for their early evening beer, I was feeling human again.
Barely.
“Hey, guys.” I set down napkins in front of them both. “Same as usual?”
“Yep,” Wayne answered for them both.
“Are you feeling okay, Thea?” Ronny asked.
“No,” I confessed with a smile, then went to the taps to pour them each a red beer. “Too much vodka last night.”
Wayne chuckled. “That’ll do it.”
“Can I get you some aspirin?” Ronny asked.
“I’m okay.” I winked at him. “Thanks, though.”
Wayne and Ronny were as opposite as they came, other than both being single. Wayne was in his fifties, had been divorced for years and worked at the school doing maintenance. Anything and everything you might want to know about his life, he’d share without hesitation.
Ronny was closer to my age, and though he wasn’t as chatty as Wayne, he was just as much of a sweetheart. He worked from home, so he came into the bar often to socialize. Mostly he listened, but on the dead nights, he and Wayne would talk to me about nothing and everything until I closed down the bar. Ronny always made sure I was okay.
“Here you go, guys.” I set down their beers. “Holler if you need anything.” I smiled and turned to leave but stopped to look over my shoulder. “I take that back. Don’t holler. My headache can’t take yelling. Maybe just wave me over silently.”
They each laughed, sipping their drinks as the back door opened and Jackson walked in, ready to take over for the night.
“You look like shit,” he teased. “Rough night?”
“Don’t make fun of me.” I whipped his side with my bar rag. “I’m still not sure I’m going to live.”
“If you were going to tie one on last night, you could have at least come in here and kept me company.”
“Was it slow?” I’d been so miserable this morning, every task had taken me twice as long, so I hadn’t finished reconciling the deposits from last night.
“Yeah. I had a couple of folks come in for a few hours but by eleven it was dead, so I closed down early.”
“Maybe tonight will be busier.”
“Hopefully.” He opened the dishwasher and let the steam escape. “Are you coming in after Charlie’s game?”
“Yeah.” It was our tradition to have pizza after soccer. “I invited Logan to come too.”
Jackson slammed the dishwasher closed and crossed his arms over his chest. “You need to be careful. I don’t trust that guy.”
I rolled my eyes. “You don’t trust anyone.”
“And neither should you.”
“Well, I don’t really have a choice this time, do I? Charlie deserves a chance to get to know her father. Logan is asking for some time with her, so I’m letting him have it.”
“I hope that’s all you’re letting him have,” he muttered.
“What are you talking about?”
“He might want to spend time with Charlie, but he’s also here to get laid. I didn’t miss the way he looked at you.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
Logan probably had ample opportunities for sex in New York. He might even have a girlfriend. Goddamn it. What if he had a girlfriend? I’d almost kissed him last night.
My head started pounding again. I’d been so focused on sharing details about my life and Charlie’s that I hadn’t bothered to ask Logan about his.
“Whatever.” Jackson went back to the dishwasher. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
“Instead of being a prick, you could be supportive. You know, act like my best friend? And it would help Charlie too if you didn’t bust his ass when we come in here tonight.”
Jackson frowned as he lifted out the warm pint glasses. “Tell you what. For Charlie’s sake, I won’t say anything tonight. But I’m not going to be supportive until after he leaves and comes back.”
I had faith that Logan would come back and be true to his word, so I smiled. “Good.”
“For a year.”
My smile fell. “What?”
“He comes back here, makes it a point to visit Charlie throughout the entire year, then I’ll be supportive. And by visit Charlie, I mean he’s not coming here so he can fuck you. Has he made a move on you yet?”
I narrowed my eyes. “That’s none of your business.”
“That’s a yes.”
I didn’t have the time or energy to deal with this. “I’m leaving. We’ll see you later.”
Tossing my rag on the counter, I walked behind him and down the bar. But before I got to the hallway, I stopped and turned. “Charlie is having a hard time with this. I’m asking you, Uncle Jackson, not to be a dick to her dad.”
He shrugged. “We’ll see.”
“I’m warning you, if you make this hard for her, I’ll make sure that every one of those plastic out-of-staters you’re so fond of taking home after closing thinks you have crabs.”
We scowled at each other. He lasted a while, but just like always, he was the first to break.
His mouth stretched in a slow grin. “Fair enough.”
“Good.” I huffed and spun back around, grabbing my things from the office before stomping the three blocks home. I used my ten minutes of quiet time alone to sit on the couch and get my blood pressure back to normal.
I loved Jackson. He was my best friend and the closest thing I had to a brother. And I knew his heart was in the right place. He was just wary of strangers. We had that in common. Life had taught us that, more often than not, other people would let you down.
But having Charlie and leaving the city had softened me. I wasn’t constantly looking for ulterior motives with the people I met. Sure, I was on guard. But I wasn’t so untrusting that I never let anyone close.
Not Jackson.
He trusted two adults: me and Hazel. Everyone else was kept at arm’s length. He hooked
up with out-of-staters so he could send them packing the next morning. He was “friends” with the regulars at the bar but didn’t see them outside of work.
Besides me and Hazel, his only other true emotional attachment was to my daughter. I had no doubt that if Logan broke Charlie’s heart, or mine, Jackson would dump his dead body in the middle of the lake.
Was I being too trusting with Logan? Over the last two days, I’d weighed every one of his words, assessing them for sincerity. They’d all seemed genuine. Were my feelings for him clouding my judgment? Had I gotten so caught up in his allure that I’d been blinded?
Okay, brain. You’re forgiven.
Last night, I’d tossed and turned in my drunken haze, pissed at my better judgment for not letting Logan kiss me. Now I was determined more than ever not to let that kiss happen. Logan had to prove that he was in this for Charlie, not for sex with me.
He had to prove that he was coming back for our daughter.
“Mommy!” Charlie called as she ran through the door with Hazel on her heels.
“Hi, honey.” I stood from the couch, giving her a hug. “How was your day?”
“Good.” She smiled over her shoulder at Hazel. “Gran made me and the other kids a huge tub of slime.”
“That sounds like fun.” And it explained why her normally dirt-covered cheeks were clean and her fingers were tinged with blue.
“It was something,” Hazel said and plopped into the spot on the couch I’d just vacated. “I’ve been cleaning up slime for an hour.”
“Are you coming to the game?”
She laughed. “Do I ever?”
“No.” I smiled. “But you know I always offer.”
Hazel had come to three of Charlie’s soccer games last year, then declared she was done. She said it was too hot and uncomfortable sitting on the grass. I’d offered to buy lawn chairs but she’d still refused.
Really, I think that after volunteering at the camp all day and playing with Charlie, Hazel was exhausted by the time she came home. Since Charlie didn’t seem to mind her missing the games, we left her to some peace and quiet.
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