It was just after John had told them that Lancaster University offered degrees in both, and there were worse places to study as if he was trying to sell them a life in the north, that he mentioned Ribblehead.
‘I hope you don’t mind if I ask,’ he began. ‘But what’s so special about it?’
Casper looked up from where he had been scraping his plate, concern clouding his face.
‘It’s okay, Cass,’ Liam said. ‘I can talk about it.’
Whether he could do so without crying was another matter, but when Casper’s feet again entwined with his, he knew he wouldn’t be doing it alone.
‘My mum,’ he said, and thanks to Casper’s presence, there was no shudder, and no tears pricked his eyes. ‘She died when I was twelve. Cancer. I sat with her every evening after school, just sitting there, not knowing what to talk about but knowing that I didn’t have long with her…’ Perhaps the tears were going to come after all. He blinked at Casper who reached across the table and took his hand. It helped more than Liam could have imagined. ‘The day before she died,’ he continued, talking to their hands. ‘It was as if she knew it was her last day. She’d not taken her drugs so she could speak lucidly, and she had the family photo album with her. I’d seen it plenty of times, but that day, she only wanted to show me one image; a twenty-four-span viaduct in a place I’d never heard of. She told me about this holiday her and Dad went on before they were married. She pointed at one end and ran a finger across the photo following the curve of the railway line and stopped halfway through. There, she said, right there, was when she experienced the happiest moment of her life. Dad proposed to her right above arch fourteen.’
Casper’s firm grip and John’s fatherly hand on his shoulder kept the tears at bay, and he continued with a newfound strength.
‘I promised her that I’d see it one day,’ Liam said. ‘And she said she hoped…’
The memory robbed him of his breathing as the tears crowded behind his eyes, but Casper was smiling sympathetically and holding his hand with no embarrassment, and Liam knew he was loved honestly and without shame.
‘She hoped…’ he said, recovering. ‘That when I saw it, it would be on the happiest day of my life too. And it is.’
Smiling warmly, Casper squeezed his hand before letting go. Their legs, however, remained clasped together, and Liam became aware that no-one at the table was speaking.
‘Sorry,’ he said. ‘Didn’t mean to ruin the evening, but you did ask.’
‘And thank you for telling us,’ John patted his back before returning to his beer. ‘Everything makes sense now.’
Liam smiled at Casper. ‘Yes,’ he said. ‘It does.’
Twenty-Four
That night, Liam and Casper sat on either side of the sofa bed, their backs to each other, pulling off their socks. After a large dinner and a couple of pints of Yorkshire ale coming on top of a day climbing in the winter wind, both were tired, and yet although nothing was said. They knew they wouldn’t be able to sleep.
Now that they were alone, nervous anticipation made its thrilling, but unwanted presence known. Liam was wondering if he should tell Casper what Gary had said about sex happening only when they were ready when Casper spoke first and on an unrelated subject.
‘I know what we could do tomorrow,’ he said, unbuttoning his shirt.
‘Yeah? What’s that?’
‘John said he was going to a place called Settle, and told me we could get the train from there to Carlisle and back.’
‘A day trip on a train?’
‘It goes across Ribblehead.’
Liam twisted to look across the bed. ‘You’d want to do that?’
‘Yes, if you do.’
‘Thanks,’ Liam said. ‘Yeah, I’d like that.’
‘I can’t promise that I’ll propose to you.’ Casper glanced over and gave him one of his cheeky grins.
‘No. Probably a bit soon for that.’
‘I wasn’t being serious, mate.’
Casper stood to remove his jeans, and Liam held his position, watching. The exertions of the day had stiffened his muscles, but the beer had numbed the pain and to some extent, his senses, leaving him warm and contented.
It hadn’t been an easy few days, and after everything that had happened, he expected to feel confused, but the opposite was true.
They were undressing in the same way as the night before, but where they had been two mates preparing to share a bed out of necessity, and although they were still the same people, the rules had altered. Innocent though it was that they laid their jeans neatly over the backs of chairs, their actions came with a different intent. Liam was undressing to get into bed with his boyfriend, something he still couldn’t quite believe, but something he had wanted since first laying eyes on the athletic man now turning to face him, his thumbs hooked into the top of his boxer shorts.
‘Oi,’ Casper said, pausing. ‘Look away.’
‘Why?’
‘You’ll see me naked.’
‘So?’
‘Don’t be difficult.’
‘Are you keeping yours on?’
‘I don’t usually. What are you wearing?’
‘Nothing.’ Liam’s pulse picked up speed. ‘If you want.’
‘Okay, but turn around.’
Liam saw the sense in the request. His briefs were bulging at the front, and stripping in front of Cass with a hardon would be embarrassing. Casper must have been thinking the same thing, and as much as Liam wanted to see all of him and break that particular slab of ice, he turned off the bedside lamp.
‘Better?’
‘Thanks.’
The bedsprings complained as Casper climbed in, and they protested again when Liam followed, the last of his clothes thrown somewhere on the floor.
He lay on his back with his hands by his sides and his cock aching, trying not to breathe too loudly. The house settled to silence. Even the clock seemed to tick quietly. There was no wind, and no rain pelting against the roof to camouflage the thumping of his heart. Cass was a few inches away, but he couldn’t feel his body heat, and Liam supposed he was staying at the edge of the bed, as nervous as he was, and waiting for Liam to make the first move. Holding hands in coat pockets and entwining their feet surreptitiously under tables were new and thrilling additions to a friendship that had been purely platonic, but now there was an expectation of more. This was no Jason leading him on. This was no confused classmate who didn’t care who got him off or where. Beside him was a man who wanted to be Liam’s boyfriend, and more unbelievably, it was Casper.
‘Well,’ Casper said, after an age of silence when Liam was starting to worry he’d fallen asleep. ‘This is awkward.’
A laugh bubbled in Liam’s chest. ‘Does feel a bit strange.’
‘Do you want us to move closer?’
It wasn’t an invitation Liam was going to ignore, and he wriggled across until he felt Casper’s naked hip meet his own, and their arms pressed uncomfortably together.
‘Not sure where to put my hands,’ he said. ‘How about this?’ Lifting them to his chest, he elbowed Casper in the ribs. ‘Sorry.’
‘It’s okay. Would this be easier?’
Casper’s arm moved, leaving what felt like a huge void between them. Liam detected the faintest scent of sweat and deodorant, and then the arm was burrowing behind his head, and he lifted it to give Cass room, before resting on his shoulder. In that position he could feel Casper’s racing pulse and hear his breathlessness; the same as his own.
‘Is that okay?’ Casper whispered.
‘Yeah.’
‘Good.’
Liam edged his elbow over to rest it on Casper’s chest where the flesh was smooth, and he could feel his ribs.
‘Can I ask you so
mething, Lee?’
‘Yeah.’
‘What did you do with Jason?’
It was probably the best opening line Liam was going to get, and he couldn’t think of anything better, but he said, ‘Mate, let’s not talk about that. It wasn’t much, and it wasn’t because I liked him or anything.’
‘Yeah, but what did you do?’
‘I’ll tell you what we didn’t do,’ Liam said, and swallowed to ease his dry throat.
‘What was that?’
‘We didn’t kiss.’
‘Oh.’ The silent darkness resounded with the sound of Casper’s mind whirling. ‘That’s going to feel weird,’ he said.
‘I hope not.’
Liam closed his eyes, daring himself to turn his head. He was just about to when Casper withdrew his arm, and as far as Liam could make out, rested up on one elbow. Something hard and warm poked his leg but was withdrawn immediately.
‘Was that what I think it was?’ Liam asked, lightheaded, his body trembling.
‘Yeah. Sorry. It’s a bit… You know.’
‘Oh, I know.’
The bed dipped, Casper drew a deep breath, moved, and jabbed Liam in the eye with his nose.
‘Hey, malaka,’ Liam complained through the laugh he was no longer able to control.
‘Sorry,’ Casper sniggered. ‘I was trying to kiss you. Can’t see a bloody thing.’
‘You don’t need to,’ Liam said, and giving in to his fear and doubt, fumbled to fit his arm beneath Casper’s back, and pressed himself close, his rigid cock pushed up against Casper’s side.
Casper’s arm wrapped around him as he said, ‘That’s definitely what I think it is.’
Liam slipped his leg across, and it pressed gently on Casper’s groin. Somehow in the darkness, he found Casper’s lips with his own and delivered a short peck. Casper’s arm tightened across his back, pulling him closer, and he shifted again so they were spooned face to face with their breath mingling.
‘S’ agapo,’ Casper whispered.
‘Yeah,’ Liam replied, ‘I love you too, mate.’
They kissed in the darkness, and everything that followed happened naturally.
If you have enjoyed this story, here is a list of my other novels to date. With them, I’ve put my own heat rating according to how sexually graphic they are. They are all romantic in some way apart from the short stories.
References to sex (*) A little sex (**) A couple of times (***) Quite a bit, actually (****) Cold shower required (*****)
Short erotic stories
In School & Out *****
13 erotic short stories, winner of the European Gay Porn Awards (best erotic fiction). Boarding schools and sex on a Greek island.
Older/younger MM romances
The Mentor of Wildhill Farm ****
Older writer mentors four young gay guys in more than just verbs and adjectives. Isolated setting. Teens coming out. Sex parties. And a twist.
The Mentor of Barrenmoor Ridge ***
It takes a brave man to climb a mountain, but it takes a braver lad to show him the way. Mountain rescue. Coming to terms with love, loss and sexuality.
The Mentor of Lonemarsh House ***
I love you enough to let you run, but too much to see you fall
Folk music. Hidden secrets. Family acceptance.
The Mentor of Lostwood Hall ***
A man with a future he can’t accept and a lad with a past he can’t escape. A castle. A road accident. Youth and desire.
MM romance thrillers
Other People’s Dreams ***
Screenwriter seeks four gay youths to crew his yacht in the Greek islands. Certain strings attached.
Dreams come true. Coming of age. Youth friendships and love.
The Blake Inheritance **
Let us go then you and I to the place where the wild thyme grows
Family mystery. School crush. A treasure hunt romance.
The Stoker Connection ***
What if you could prove the greatest Gothic novel of all time was a true story? Literary conspiracy. Teen boy romance. First love. Mystery and adventure.
Curious Moonlight *
He’s back. He’s angry and I am fleeing for my life.
A haunted house. A mystery to solve. A slow-burn romance. Straight to gay.
The Clearwater Mysteries
Deviant Desire ***
Book 1. A mashup of mystery, romance and adventure, Deviant Desire is set in an imaginary London of 1888. The first in an on-going series in a world where homosexuality is a crime.
Twisted Tracks **
Book 2. An intercepted telegram, a coded invitation and the threat of exposure. Viscount Clearwater must put his life on the line to protect his reputation.
Unspeakable Acts *
Book 3. A murder will take place unless Clearwater’s homosexuality is made public; can his lover stop the killing and save his reputation?
Fallen Splendour *
Book 4. A kidnapping, a court case and a poem by Tennyson. What is the connection? James has four days to find out.
Bitter Bloodline *
Book 5. What do a runaway boy and an assassin have to do with Clearwater’s famed Easter dinner party and its guest of honour, the actor, Henry Irving? Silas suspects assassination.
All these can all be found on my Amazon Author page.
Please leave a review if you can. Thanks again for reading. If you keep reading, I’ll keep writing.
Jackson
www.jacksonmarsh.com
The Students of Barrenmoor Ridge Page 28