by Rob Edwards
She saw a line of young people in white jackets along the front of the building. They were obviously the student assistants waiting for their children to arrive. One by one they made their way to the parking lot to greet the parents and the children. Judith saw a boy with a walker, another was holding his mother’s and father’s hands and shaking his head back and forth while they were trying to walk him inside. Picking out an open spot in the center of the small lot, Judith pulled in, turned off the car, opened the door, and stood up. She shaded her eyes from the sunlight while she looked for Rena Blossom. She didn’t have to look long. She caught sight of Rena’s red lips, looking neon as they reflected the early morning sunshine.
Rena waved, and rushed over. “Good morning,” she said smiling. “Isn’t this exciting?”
“Okay,” Judith said. “I’ll go with exciting,” She closed her door, walked around to the other side, and opened the back door. “Here we are, Noah.” She unlatched his car seat, took him by the hand, and he jumped down on his own.
Rena knelt in front of him. “Hello, Noah. I’m glad to see you.”
Noah sidled in next to his mother and buried his face in her leg.
Rena stood up immediately and took a few steps back. “Sorry,” She said in a whisper.
“Not a problem,” Judith said, patting Noah’s head. “He overwhelms easily.” She jerked his hand gently. “Come, Noah. Let’s go in.”
Noah stayed close but walked with her until they reached the front of the car. Then he could see all of the people and the activity of the busy parking lot. He jerked his hand free, scooted back to his car door and covered his face with his hands.
Judith looked at Rena and shrugged. “Maybe by the end of this thing he’ll feel comfortable enough to walk.”
“That’s something to shoot for,” Rena said.
“C’mon, boy.” Judith reached down and lifted him up.
Noah moaned his disagreement but then saw Rena and covered his face with his hands again.
When they reached the building, Rena opened the door. Judith stepped in and immediately recognized the smells of new carpeting and fresh paint. The place looked and smelled clean, which she had to admit, instilled a certain amount of confidence.
Dr. Fitzpatrick was in the lobby, talking to someone who looked like a reporter. He nodded and waved at her when she passed. Judith realized that was the most pleasant experience she’d had with the man since they met.
Rena led her down a hallway that had doors on both sides. “Right in here.” She opened a door and stepped back so Judith could enter.
Judith caught site of the sign next to the door that read “Higgins-Hayes.” She stopped for a moment and stared at it. She was really doing this. She was going to offer the greatest treasure of her life up to this man she hardly knew and didn’t care for.
“Delton is waiting right through there,” Rena said, probably wondering what was taking Judith so long.
Judith stepped through into a small room with a window and a counter. Through a large window she saw Delton, sitting at a table. She could tell he was nervous, and that gave her some comfort. If he was nervous that meant he was taking this seriously.
“This is where we will be observing everything that goes on in there.” Rena stepped up to the next door and flipped the latch. Judith caught sight of Delton jerk straight, preparing for the inevitable.
The door opened and Judith walked through with Noah. She nodded to Delton and he nodded back. “Are you ready for this?”
He smiled. “Ready as I’m gonna be.”
She sat Noah down in a chair at the table and knelt in front of him. “Okay, Noah honey, today is the big day we’ve been talking about.” She brushed hair out of his face. “Today you get to make a new friend.” Gently she swiveled his chair. “His name is Delton.”
Noah looked at Delton, his eyes grew wide, and he froze.
“Delton is going to teach you things, and play with you.” She stood and stepped back next to Rena.
Delton lowered his shoulders and looked at Noah with a big toothy smile. “Hello, Noah. My name is Delton,” he said, in the softest voice he could. “I want to be friends, and play together.”
Noah continued to stare at him.
“Okay, Noah honey, I’m going to be right outside,” Judith said. “You stay here and play with Delton.”
Noah continued to stare.
Delton looked from Noah to Judith. “Let me guess, he ain’t never seen a black man before, right?”
“What?” Judith said, scowling. “Yes.”
Delton looked back at Noah. “What, did you have the TV on or something?”
Judith rolled her eyes and walked out the door.
“Okay, Delton and Noah, your time together starts now. Enjoy.” Rena closed the door and turned to Judith. “Your sheet said that a Darlene Longwood will be picking him up every day. But she hasn’t come in and signed the forms yet.”
Judith nodded. “She will be by this afternoon.”
“Okay, good. We can’t release Noah to her until we meet her and she signs the forms.” Rena took a seat on the closest stool to the door, opened a notebook that was on the counter, looked at her watch, and began writing.
There were three small thuds on the hallway door. Judith opened it to see Taysha standing there balancing three cups of coffee in her hands. “Oh, I got caught by a reporter. Did I miss the opening bell?”
“You didn’t miss a thing. We just got here.” Judith took two of the cups of coffee from her. “Bless you.” She handed one to Rena who thanked her and took a drink.
Judith and Taysha each grabbed a stool at the counter and watched Delton struggle.
“So do you have any favorite games or toys you like to play with?”
Noah just stared at him, as if in a trance.
The door clicked open and Dr. Fitzpatrick poked his head through the opening. He looked at Judith and waved. “Ah. Hi, Miss Higgins. How is it going?”
“It just started,” Judith said. “But Noah’s not protesting, which is...” She held up two thumbs.
“Good. Good.” Clearly anxious, Dr. Fitzpatrick stepped into the room and walked over to her, his left foot squeaking with each step. “I saw you in the lobby but couldn’t get away.” He held out his hand and she shook his limp grip. “I wanted to say that I was surprised to hear you were going to be a part of this. I mean after…the talk.”
“You can thank Taysha for that,” Judith nodded toward her. “She helped us work everything out.”
“Oh. Certainly.” He rubbed his hand on his jacket. “Thank you, Miss Williams.”
“Umm hmm,” Taysha said.
“Well, ah, good luck.”
“Thanks.”
He smiled, squeak-stepped out of the room, and closed the door.
The three women looked back and saw Delton placing toys on the table for Noah to pick.
Taysha spoke quietly. “Does anybody know if he’s ever gonna fix that damn shoe?”
All three women laughed.
Chapter Fourteen
He was wishing he could tap out right about now. This kid was doing nothing but staring at him, like he had a worm hanging out of his nose or something. Delton had laid out some Legos, a can of Play Dough, and a few blocks on the table, but Noah wasn’t having any of it. He didn’t even look down at them. He only stared straight at Delton.
He looked up at the mirror. He knew all three women were in there watching him. Were they all laughing at this point? He wondered if they would eventually come in with a suggestion—something to help him out. He thought that at least Taysha would give a brother a hand. But there had been nothing so far from any of them.
Finally, Delton crossed his arms on the table, bent down, rested his chin on his hands, and stared back at Noah.
Noah looked back at him for another minute, then, for the first time since he got into the room, looked away from Delton’s eyes to his hands. He studied Delton’s position, then crossed his arm
s on the table and, rested his chin on his hands too.
Surprised, Delton sat up straight.
Noah sat back, startled.
“Oh no, man, I’m sorry.” Delton dropped his head back down. “It’s cool. Let’s just sit here like this for a minute.”
It took a moment for Noah to settle again, but Delton was patient. Eventually the boy resumed his position and the two stared at each other.
Delton smiled at Noah and held it, but the boy did not follow suit. Though he stared back, he was expressionless. So the two remained there, in that position for what seemed like an hour, but Delton surmised was probably about five minutes.
Tired of sitting, doing nothing, and seemingly out of options, Delton scanned the room. Noah didn’t appear to be interested in toys, perhaps there was something else. Spying the stuffed animals in the corner he looked back at Noah. “So what’s your favorite animal?” Avoiding any quick movements, he slid back off the table, crawled out of his chair, across the room, and over to the pile of stuffed animals.
Noah lifted his head, sat back, and looked over his shoulder at Delton.
“You like any of these?” Delton picked up a small green dragon with little floppy wings. “How about this dragon?” He made it fly in the air, mouthing a whooshing sound. Using his fingers he rustled them in front of the dragon’s mouth and tried his best to sound like a stream of fire.
Noah sat there, looking over his shoulder in what, Delton thought, was the most uncomfortable position. He crawled over and slowly put a hand on Noah’s chair, swiveling it around.
Noah looked down at his feet, then quickly on both sides of the chair.
“Sorry, Noah. I didn’t mean to spook you. I was just turning you around so you could see better.”
Noah jumped from his chair, turned around, and looked at it. He reached over and gave it a shove and it swiveled until the back hit the table. He grabbed the arm and pulled it farther away and gave it another shove. The chair turned all the way around.
“Do you want to sit in it, and I’ll spin you?”
Noah positioned himself along one of the arms, and then walked it around and around.
Delton watched him for a few minutes. Noah continued to turn the chair in circles and walk around it. “I can spin you while you sit in it?” Noah acted as if he no longer existed. All that existed now was the chair. He continued to turn in circles with it.
Perhaps, Noah didn’t understand what he meant. Standing, Delton stepped over and reached down to catch Noah and place him in the chair. “Here. Let me show you something fun.” But as soon as his hands were around Noah, the boy made a sound that was half crying, half screaming. The volume of it startled Delton and he jumped back. “Sorry,” Delton said. He turned to the mirror. “I’m sorry. I didn’t hurt him. I swear.” He could feel his own heart pounding for fear he would get thrown out of the program on the first day. “I’m sorry, Miss Higgins. I wasn’t trying to do nothin’ but spin him in the chair.”
Three taps were heard on the glass. Nothing more. He assumed that meant everything was okay. At least there weren’t any guards busting through the doors dragging him out to the bus. It appeared he was going to remain in the program.
Looking back at Noah, who was still turning the chair, Delton realized he was completely out of options. The boy was running this show and there was nothing he could do about it. He decided to nestle down into one of the bean bag chairs and relax while Noah got this out of his system.
One hour later the boy was still going at it. He didn’t slow, didn’t change directions, didn’t stop for a breath. He just continued to spin the chair in circles. Delton had no idea how that could be fun, let alone how the boy continued without puking. “Aren’t you getting tired of that yet?”
Noah continued on.
Delton picked up a plush stuffed duck, surprised at how soft it was. Rolling it over in his hands he realized there was something inside the head. When he squeezed, it squeaked.
Noah stopped turning and looked at the duck.
Delton squeaked it two more times.
Noah looked from the duck to Delton and back to the duck.
Delton squeaked it again.
Noah started turning the chair once more.
Squeaking the duck a few more times, Delton was searching for even the slightest reaction, but Noah never slowed again. The duck squeak was nothing more than distant background noise to the boy, and of no concern. Delton realized he too was as useless to the boy as the squeak of the duck.
Chapter Fifteen
“I’m telling you right now, this day is pretty much done,” Judith said. She’d seen her son discover new items or actions before and knew he could last for hours, or even all day doing the same thing. “This is new for him and he’s found something to take the edge off. He’s going to be turning that chair the rest of the day.”
“That’s okay,” Rena said. “Noah is only half of the project. Now we have the opportunity to see how Mr. Hayes reacts to the situation.” She continued to jot small sentences down in her notebook.
Judith looked out at Delton. He sat on the bean bag chair looking at the duck in his hands. She could read the frustration on his face, and she found herself almost feeling sorry for him. She knew he had not anticipated his morning running this way at all. But he would quickly learn what she had experienced; that there is no way to be sure you’re making a difference with an autistic child until all of a sudden he decides to let you know.
“I’m going to get some air and stretch my legs.” Judith stood and walked to the door. “Can I get anything for anybody while I’m out?”
Rena shook her head. “No, thank you.” Taysha was leaning on her hand, eyes closed.
Judith left the room and walked down the now silent hallway. Looking at the names on the walls by the doors, she wondered how things were going in each room—wondered what hurdles each of these parents had to jump on a daily basis.
When she reached the lobby, a man sprung from a chair. “Excuse me, are you a parent of one of the children?” It was the reporter that had been talking to Dr. Fitzpatrick when she walked in. He had on a blue windbreaker over a yellow sweater and he was holding his phone out in front of him like a microphone.
“Yes, I am,”
“Hi. I’m Jason Kitchener, with Michigan-Online. Do you mind if I ask you a few questions?”
“I’m sorry, Jason,” She said, shaking her head. “I’m really not the one to talk to about this.” She turned and left him hanging there with his phone in the air.
“Okay,” He said. “Have a good day.”
She opened the outer doors and took a deep breath of fresh air. Except for the occasional car winding down the curvy road, it was quiet out here as well. It gave her a chance to be alone with her thoughts.
She had been impressed with Delton so far. Not that he’d made a big impact on Noah, but that he showed the patience necessary to handle a child with that deep a disability. He had real terror in his eyes after Noah’s outburst. Judith had to let him off the hook by tapping on the glass. Rena had told her not to interfere in any way with the interaction between them, but Judith couldn’t let him twist in the wind. She felt that in order for this experiment to be worth anything, he had to at least be aware of what was acceptable and what wasn’t. If Delton felt afraid every time Noah squawked, he would be completely ineffectual—not willing to really try anything for fear of upsetting her son.
Looking to her right, Judith spied a woman leaning against the corner of the building, smoking a cigarette. Thinking this was probably another one of the mothers, she decided to go say hi to a fellow guinea pig parent. As she drew closer she saw the woman’s long hair was unbrushed, and pulled back into a frizzy ponytail. The woman turned to her and nodded. Judith could see she wore a black t-shirt with a picture of skulls surrounded by lightning bolts with the words “Metallica, World Magnetic Tour.”
The woman blew out a puff of smoke and said “Hi.”
Judith nodded. “How are you?”
“Eh,” The woman shrugged. “Not used to getting up this early.” She laughed. “But you gotta do what you gotta do. Right?”
“Yep.” Judith instantly regretted walking down.
“I’m Sadie.”
“Ju…dee. I’m Judy.”
“I’m assuming you got a kid here?” Sadie said, and took another puff.
“Yes.”
“What’s wrong with him?”
“He’s autistic,” Judith said.
Sadie blew out her smoke. “Autism, man. That’s some serious shit.”
“Yes, it is,” Judith said. “How about your child?”
“Intellectual development disorder. They say it’s caused by fetal alcohol syndrome, but I think that’s horse shit.”
“Why is that? Did you not drink when you were pregnant?”
“Oh, I drank,” The woman said. “But so have so many other mothers, since the dawn of time and there’s nothing wrong with any of us.” The woman took another drag off her cigarette and blew out the smoke. “They are continually finding ways to make people feel guilty about enjoying their lives.” She flicked the butt into the parking lot. “Well, I better get back in there. Catch ya later, Judy.”
Judith nodded. “Yes.”
The woman walked back into the building leaving Judith to wonder how much Sadie’s mother drank while being pregnant. She just couldn’t understand that type of thinking. You are given a great responsibility when you’re pregnant. All you have to do is go for nine months without succumbing to your little vices. Literally a human life depends on you. And you are so damn selfish that you can’t even do that? You can’t bother to do whatever it takes to give your defenseless unborn child every opportunity to thrive…to have a shot at being healthy?
She decided to get back. Walking to the door she saw Jason Kitchener coming out. He saw her, gave her a wave, and headed into the parking lot.
Judith walked back in and re-entered the hallway of doors. She scanned the name signs again, and thought about the parents one more time. Were they like Sadie? Were their kids victims of selfish parents who’s abuses started while they were still in the womb?