The Changing Light at Sandover
Page 20
5.3
Eyelevel sunset. The blue room. JM:
It’s clear now! Suddenly I see my way—
Wystan, Maria, you and I, we four
Nucleate a kind of psychic atom.
(Mind you, it works best as metaphor:
The atom being, as They’ve said, a peace
That passes understanding, we make do
With its outdated model by Niels Bohr—
A quasi-solar system.) At the core
We are kept from shattering to bits
By the electron hearts, voices and wits
Of our dead friends—how maddeningly slow
One is; E told us all this weeks ago—
In orbit round us. DJ: Each carbon atom,
This much I remember from high school,
Has four bonds. Are we four hooked on a redhot
Coal in plumes? JM: Mixed metaphor.
We’re like an atom, not a molecule.
DJ: And five now. 741
Joined us, changing our atomic weight
When he changed. JM: Oh, let’s complicate
It irretrievably! Why stop at five?
If there’s no accident, all things alive
Or dead that touch us—Ephraim, the black dog
In Athens, Cynthia—but why go on?—
Are droplets in a “probability fog”
With us as nucleus. And yet our peacock
Mustn’t touch us. His whole point’s the atom’s
Precarious inviolability.
Eden tells a parable of fission,
Lost world and broken home, the bitten apple
Stripped of its seven veils, nakedness left
With no choice but to sin and multiply.
From then on, genealogical chain reactions
Ape the real thing. Pair by recurrent pair
Behind the waterfall, one dark, one fair,
Siblings pitted each against the other
—Shem and Shaun, Rebekah’s twins, whichever
Brother chafes within the Iron Mask—
Enact the deep capacities for good
And evil in the atom. DJ (groans):
I guess so, sure. It’s just that with this damn
Knife hanging over me in five more days…
I try not to be frightened, but I am.
JM: Come on, I feel in my old bones
That all’s well. Now let’s see what our friend says.
5.4
INDEED A PLUS
About D’s prospects?
YES & ALL THE REST WE LEAND FROM YR WALLS
APPLAUDING & SWARMD IN THE GOLDEN SPACE BOUNDED BY BLUE.
OPPOSING LIGHT MADE A GLORIOUS HAZE U FLOATED IN
TODAY YR SPECULATIONS TOOK ON WHAT WE RECOGNIZE
FROM OUR OWN FORMULAS: A GLOW WHICH MEANS PROCEED ?S
No—proceed, proceed!
ON THE APPEARANCE OF THE 12 PER CENT THEY WILL BEGIN
ALONE. KEEP SILENT U WILL HAVE AS WITH ALL EXALTED
PERSONAGES A ? HOUR THEY ARE THE HEART OF GOOD
& U NEED NOT FEAR THEM AS THEY DRAW NEARER I WILL BE
SIGNALD AS TO FURTHER PROTOCOL
DJ: They’re sticklers? DEAR BOY DOES HE KNOW?
WE FANCY HE’S INFALLIBLE NOT SO
AH I KEEP WISHING
TO BE TAKEN FOR REAL IN MY NEW FINERY LIKE A
PRINCE IN A PLAY IT WILL BE HARD TO REMOVE THE MAKEUP
PERHAPS EVEN AFTER YR ROOM HAS SWARMD WITH ANGELS U
WILL HEAR MY TAP & OPEN AS BEFORE
Won’t you hear what the angels have to say?
O O NO NO
Lightly, dismissively shrugged off, the cup
Recoiling from the thought. JM: We’ll need
Help with the poem, things to be looked up.
—Very excitedly (what a child he is):
I AM AN EXCELLENT RESEARCHER! NOW ACCIDENT 2:
WE ARE THE FORCES THAT SOME MIGHT ACCUSE OF DEVIL’S WORK
WE MAKE THE OIL SHEIK GREEDY & RAISE IN MM’S DREAMBEDS
HIDEOUS BLOOMS TO STIR UP RIVALRY AT HIGH LEVELS.
IT IS THE LAST USE FOR RELIGION, TO KEEP AT SWORDSPOINT
THE GREAT FACTIONS OF EAST & WEST SO THAT LESSER POWERS
FACING MASS STARVATION WILL BE DISTRACTED FROM DROPPING
ATOMIC BOMBS TO GET FOOD. IN MAN THIS COMPETITIVE
ELEMENT IS AN ORIGINAL JEW DENSITY: BY
EARLY ASSYRIA GOD B HAD CODIFIED 1000S
OF LOCAL CROC & BULL RELIGIONS INTO INTERNAL
POLITICS & ONLY RARELY THE SMALL DEVASTATING
TRIBAL WAR. ONCE THE NATIONS WERE FIXT GOD B INTRODUCED
HIS RELIGION (TO AKHNATON): ONE GOD IN MAN’S IMAGE:
A KIND OF PRIDE IN MIND THIS TO PRODUCE THE 3 MAJOR
FAITHS ON EARTH. HAVING PROMOTED HIS RATIONAL SYSTEM
GOD B NEXT HAD TO EDUCATE HIS PRIESTS THE SUFFERINGS
OF GALILEO ET AL AWOKE SCIENCE TO CAUTION
& COURAGE G (ONE OF THE 5) BECAME A SAINT WITHIN
HIS OWN LIFETIME & THE PRIESTHOOD BEGAN ITS RELUCTANT
REAPPRAISAL OF NATURE & HER LAWS
CONGRATULATE MAMAN LAST NIGHT SHE SOWED
A SHOCKER INTO BREZHNEV MILLIONS OF LITTLE
YELLOW FACES STRAIGHT OUT OF THE DAISY PATCH
ACCIDENT 3:
THE GAP BETWEEN CAUSE & EFFECT NOW HAD TO BE NARROWD.
B4, GOD B HAD ALLOWD AN AMPLE MARGIN (NOTHING
PROMOTES BELIEF QUITE LIKE THE BENEVOLENT ACCIDENT)
THUS THE THINNING PROCESS OF SOME OF OUR PLAGUES WAS ALLOWD
TO OUTRUN ITS USUAL COURSE & THE POPE GOT HIS CURE &
HIS IMMORTALITY, THE CHURCH ITS STRENGTH, & THE PEOPLE
CLEAN WATER ACCIDENT HAD BEEN USEFUL
“Your” plagues? GOD B USED US.
CAUSE: RATS EFFECT: MINOR INFECTION OUR TRUSTY FIRE:
PLAGUE PROLONGD UNTIL AN EDICT FROM POPE FAUST TO DISPENSE
IN MARKET PLACES THE HOLY (BOILD BY HIS PRIESTS) WATER
STOPT IT NONE OF THIS AS U SEE TRULY ACCIDENTAL
Tell me, have you read Candide?
MY DEAR HE WROTE IT ANYONE CAN READ
THE PLAGUE WAS PLANND FOR 2 EFFECTS: THIN POPULATION &
KEEP IT PREDOMINANTLY RURAL WE HAVE A MAXIM:
MAN IS HIS OWN HEAT. MAN IN YR TIME IS GROUPD THE MACHINE
DROVE HIM INTO CITIES GHETTOS OF LITERACY WHERE
IDEAS LIKE NEUROSES IN LARGE CLOSELIVING HOUSEHOLDS
INCREASD & GOOD & BAD KEPT PACE (THE CRIMES, THE LIBRARIES)
ALL THIS FROM THE HEAT OF MAN’S PROXIMITY TO MAN. EARTH
RADIATES TO US THESE HEAT CENTERS WHICH ALARM GOD B
INTO EFFECTING NEW METHODS WE MUST CLONE THE SCRIBE TO
REGULATE URBAN GROWTH LEST IN ITS PLAGUE MAN HIMSELF BE
BOILD. HIROSHIMA PRODUCED 2 DRAMATIC NOTIONS: FEAR
OF THE FUSED ATOM AND OF THE FUSED MAN IN HIS CLOSELY
PACKD CITY. PROPERLY CLONED ARCHITECTS ARE ON THEIR WAY
YET MUCH OLD-RELIGION-LIKE ALLURE CLINGS TO NARROW STREETS,
& MAN TO HIS ROMANTIC DISEASE: ANONYMITY
ACCIDENT 4: GOD B PERCEIVING THAT THE ACCIDENT
WHICH CAME BETWEEN AKHNATON & PERFECT FISSION WAS SLIGHT,
IMPOSSIBLE EITHER TO PREVENT OR TO COUNTENANCE,
KNEW THAT HIS CHILD WAS RIPE FOR THE R/LAB HE HAD PREPARED.
WE WERE SUMMOND IMPRINTED WITH NEW FORMULAS HENCEFORTH
ACCIDENT WD BE A T
OOL: JM & DJ MEET &
E ENTERS WHERE THEIR MINDS SEEK DIVERSION BUT THE MINDS? E?
THE SHAPING LOVES OF 2 SETS OF PARENTS? NO ACCIDENT
NOT SINCE THOSE MINUTE DIAMONDS NEARLY DESTROYD WORLD 3
And yet each actor, as he plays his part,
Appears to take enormous liberties.
What is that—the art that conceals art?
INDEED SO THINKS THE SPERM AS IT RUSHES TOWARD THE EGG
5.5
The parlor, Jacksonville.
Lamplight through the glass transom
Stained to some final visibility
Like tissue on a slide—as,
Hole by pre-punched hole,
From the magnolia tree
Outpoured the mockingbird’s
Player-piano roll…
The ring flashed. A young girl, a grizzled Midas,
Hand to heart, more freely
Drew upon their quota
Of feelings and fine words.
Or starlight on the porch
In Deadwood, South Dakota.
Glitter of wee facets
Led Mary’s eye past toothpick and moustache
And narrow mask of satyr
Above the lengthening ash,
Till nothing seemed to matter,
Her job, the Homestake Mine…
The future was a scrim
Behind which forms kept beckoning and shining.
Just as it went opaque
She reached out, and touched him.
5.6
What of the three or four billion you don’t clone
In the Research Lab? Don’t their destinies—
Densities—affect our own?
I WATCH U COOK U HAVE A MACHINE THAT EATS USELESS THINGS
THIS IS THE (M) FATE OF USELESS LIVES
Oh please!
YET THE STALKS FED TO THAT
CLATTERING GULLET PRODUCED THE LEAVES U WILL EAT TONIGHT.
THE EFFECTS OF SUCH LIVES ON U JM ARE IN YR GENES
R N A: REMEMBER NO ACCIDENT
ACCIDENT 5:
THOSE BILLIONS SHED UP TO 150,000 ANIMAL
SOUL DENSITIES PER HUMAN LIFE THEY MUST BE REPROCESSD
AT TOP SPEED & WITH MINIMAL STRAIN TO THE LAB WE RUN
ON AN UNTHINKABLE LEVEL OF WORK HERE LUCKILY
OUR BUREAUCRACY IS NONUNION. WE WORK LET US SAY
IN FRIENDLY RIVALRY WITH NATURE NOW NATURE KNOWS NO
LIMITS BUT I DO & I SEE THAT THE AUDIENCE IS
LEAVING SO THIS PERFORMANCE WILL BE RESUMED TOMORROW
DOES IT BEAR THINKING OF? Dear Wystan, who
Has time for thinking? WAIT LET IT SINK IN
THEN NO HEXAGONAL LAUGH No sick-sided pun?
U GOT IT AFTER YEARS OF THOUGHT LOVE TOIL
GLEAMING DISTORTION & ARTICULATE PAIN
THE FUTURE’S FLESHLY ROBOTS WILL DISDAIN,
LET OUR FAUST ASK HIMSELF WHAT’S LEFT TO BOIL
It sinks in gradually, all that’s meant
By this wry motto governing things here
Below and there above: No Accident.
Patrons? Parents? Healthy achievers, bent
On moving up, not liable to queer
The Lab work. It sinks in, what had been meant
By the adorable dumb omen sent
TO TEST EXALT & HUMBLE U MY DEAR
Strato? ET AL Maisie? NO ACCIDENT
Gunman high-strung and Archduke negligent,
Warnings garbled in the dreamer’s ear?
All, all, it sinks in gradually, was meant
To happen, and not just the gross event
But its minutest repercussion. We’re
Awed? Unconvinced? That too’s no accident.
The clause is self-enacting; the intent,
Like air, inscrutable if crystal-clear.
Keep breathing it. One dark day, what it meant
Will have sunk in past words. No Accident.
5.7
WYSTAN TRANSFIGURED BY YR SEMINAR
LIKENS IT TO OXFORD UNDER NEWMAN
Entre nous, Chester, I keep wishing our
Cardinal were dyed a shade less vivid
By the popular imagination. AH
NOW I SEE WHAT HE MEANS BY THE CHURCH SUPPERS
DJ: Are you aware of being used
To protect us in some form or other?
QUITE AWARE THEY BORROW MY SCARF IT COMES
BACK ALL SOOTY WYSTAN CAMPS IT UP
BUT I CAN TELL HE’S ILL AT EASE: ‘IVE NEVER
BEEN IN A SCHOOL B4 WHERE IT WAS SO
OUT OF THE QUESTION TO HAVE A CRUSH ON THE MASTER’
I LEAVE U PETS LUCA HAS GIVEN THAT
VULGAR BUT EFFECTIVE 2FINGERED WHISTLE
Luca! WHY NOT? A MATCH YR EPHRAIM MADE
MAD LITTLE NUMBER BUT I’M GETTING LIMBERED
UP FOR THE NEW RACE TO BE RELAID!
WAIT ANOTHER 16 YEARS & SEE
WHO CRUISES U IN YR PITH ELEGANT
HELMETS I’LL BE TURNED ON BY OLDIES BYE
Maria, keep him dark and continent
When you return as a jungle. PLEASE A TREE
Oh, was that settled? Sorry. I’d forgotten.
ON ME THE DAILY LESSON IS EMBLAZED
U HAVE DISTRACTIONS THIS IS OUR WHOLE WORLD
PROTECTED U MAY THINK? BUT I AM BEING
USED USED UTTERLY TO THE VERY ASH
NO WASTE NO ACCIDENT OUR BECOMING FRIENDS
OUR COFFEES GOSSIPS DRIVES TO SOUNION
What have we done to you, Maman? BAH ONE
BIG DATING COMPUTER MES ENFANTS GET WISE:
TO BE USED HERE IS THE TRUE PARADISE
ACCIDENT 6: HEREDITY & ENVIRONMENT ARE
CLONABLE THUS IN ADAPTING CK’S OLD DENSITIES
TO A NEW SOUL WE MUST MAKE DO WITH CERTAIN TASTES ALLIED
TO HIS CREATIVE WIT BY WAY OF CONTROL WE PLACE HIM
IN A DECENT EDUCATED AFRICAN HOME FATHER
WORKS FOR A WHITE ORG A SCOUTMASTER QUITE DEDICATED
Poor Chester, hard to picture as a Scout
—Are you OK? For David bites his lip.
DJ WHAT DO U FEAR? U HAVE 29 LONG YEARS TO GO
The thought of the anesthetic, the blacking out…
NOT A TOTAL BLACKOUT CURTAINS WILL RISE ON A VISION
WE MEAN TO KEEP U ENTERTAIND
JM (envious): Don’t let him forget it!
SHALL WE STORE IT UP IN
THE GINGERPOT? ON THE 9TH POST-OP DAY TELL HIM TO LOOK
This empty ginger-pot here on the sideboard?
BLUE & WHITE LIKE OUR CUP HAVE DJ LIFT THE LID MEANWHILE
TO U JM WILL COME CORRESPONDING DREAM IMAGES
ALL PART OF OUR LONG PREPARATION FOR THE 12 P/C:
DJ’S OLD INJURY (OUR AGENT THE MIRROR) THE BREAK
THE ANESTHESIA EACH ARRIVES ON SCHEDULE
DJ: The break? IN OUR LESSONS DEAR ENFANT
ALL GOOD MEALS
MUST BE DIGESTED NO PEACOCK FEATHER AFTER THIS FEAST
HAND UP OF OUR ENGLISH FIRSTER?
SIR IS NOT BELIEF IN A LIFE WHOLLY
OUT OF HIS HANDS UNNATURAL TO MAN?
INDEED & THAT IS WHY
HE NEVER WHOLLY BELIEVES IT, NOT EVEN U HAND UP?
MAY I? SAVE FOR MY PRESENT DEAR ENFANTS
I HAD NO CHILDREN WAS THAT MY DESTINY?
INDEED PARTLY BECAUSE OTHERS WD HAVE C
ROWDED THE NEST
PARTLY FOR REASONS THAT WD MEAN NOTHING TO U WE PLAN
NOT FOR ONE SMALL EFFECT THE ACCIDENT GAP DISAPPEARS
ACCIDENT 7: THE CONFINES OF THE GREENHOUSE THE OZONE
BELT IS NOT A CEILING BUT THE FLOOR OF THE NEXT LEVEL
THE (M) FOUNDATION STONE OF EDEN 2 THE SUN & ITS
WHOLE SYSTEM IS OF THE GREENHOUSE THERE ARE OTHER SYSTEMS
& THE SUNS & THE GODS OF EACH THESE ARE THE PANTHEON.
THE SCHEME OF WORLD 3 BEING CHIEFLY BIOLOGICAL
MIGHT GOD B NOT HAVE BEEN SELECTED FROM THE PANTHEON
WHEN THIS SYSTEM WAS BORN? FOR WE KNOW THE SUN IS HIS SLAVE
5.8
ACCIDENT 8:
We hate to interrupt, but what connection
Did Lesson 7 have with Accident?
A PLUS THE GREENHOUSE IS NO ACCIDENT
Then neither was your crust world, or Atlantis—
WHAT OF PREATLANTIS? ONE OF OUR MYTHS IS THAT FROM THE
GALACTIC PANTHEON CAME GOD B TO BUILD HIS GREENHOUSE:
THE SUN HIS SLAVE IS ALSO HIS CREATION IT IS HIS
CENTRAL ATOMIC POWER. THE MYTH OF PROMETHEUS
IS OUR STORY. NOW MAN TRIES TO SEIZE & RULE THE ATOM
BUT AS HIS ORIGIN IS ELECTRIC HE WILL REMAIN
CONTROLLABLE. ELECTRICAL POWER IS ORGANIC,
ATOMIC POWER…GALACTIC? WE KNOW ONLY IT IS
THE FIRE THE FUEL OF THE PANTHEON OF THE GODS
OF THE VARIOUS GALAXIES GOD B GUARDS THIS POWER
JEALOUSLY IT IS HIS BRIGHT RED APPLE
ACCIDENT 8:
WE FELL. WERE WE GOD’S 1ST ACCIDENT? OR 1ST INSTRUMENTS?
THERE IS NO ACCIDENT ERGO WE WERE USED TO DESTROY
A USELESS EXPERIMENT. WE IN OUR MYTHS SEE OURSELVES
AS BROOMS & THE WITCH? OUR VOCATION AS MESSENGERS
We never asked, were you both male and female?
WELL
PUT IT THAT WAY IF U MUST OUR NUMBERS NEVER VARIED
FROM THOSE PRODUCED IN THE CENTAURS’ HATCHERIES UNTIL, LATE
IN OUR BRIEF WORLD NEEDING SERVANTS, WE REPRODUCED OURSELVES:
HALF OUR NUMBERS HAD EGG SACS & HALF HAD INSULATED
RADIUM VESCICLES WHICH FERTILIZED THEN FED THE EGGS.
WE WERE AS NOTHING U CAN IMAGINE ONLY YR BAT