“No way, you can see your colleagues having sex?” Her mouth fell in surprise.
“I didn’t say anything. They could be training for all I know!” He raised his arms in surrender and returned an innocent smile. “Come, we’re close to your chambers.”
“Why do you keep saying chambers?” There was no way to suppress that giggle.
“Because ‘bedroom’ lacks panache and finesse.” He chuckled back. “Here we are.” Jasper took a step back as he delivered Zoey to her bedroom door. She wondered what had made him quicken the pace. Was it something she said, something she did?
“I hope you enjoyed your sandwich.” It was almost like he couldn’t say it fast enough. “Goodnight.” Turning around, he made his way to the safety of his bedroom only four steps down the hall.
“Goodnight, Jasper.” She sheepishly looked at his frame disappearing through the door before pressing her door handle. Someone had changed her lilac bedsheets and replaced them with white ones. Invisible room service, invisible catering, visible red cheeks.
She checked her face in the mirror, looking for something to justify his awkwardness. Maybe she had smelly cheese between her teeth, or perhaps a jam-stache. Whatever it was, it didn’t seem to be coming from her face. Embarrassing didn’t quite cut it.
So trippy…
She exhaled and stormed off to brush her teeth and run another bath for the sake of that amazing tub and making the most of what she had, as Sam said earlier. Warm water always felt good against her skin. The bathroom already smelled like lavender and soap, and there was comfort in the privacy of her tub as her toes fiddled with the tap.
She didn’t even allow herself the time to think what being a hybrid now meant, although according to Lilou they were all in top shape. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she secretly wished to go invisible or freeze everyone else like Jasper had. Now that would’ve been an awesome superpower to have. Instead, she couldn’t forget and somehow, that alone made her an asset in Beck’s eyes. Enough so, that the optans had to freeze their timelines. She shook her head, still baffled that was even possible: to put someone’s life on hold while the rest just went on with theirs. At least she didn’t have to worry about lying to her moms.
Everything was warm here in June—the light, the magnificent towel she wrapped herself in as she stepped out, and the massive closet.
In a rebellious mood, she dropped the towel, opened the door of her closet, and pulled out a white satin nightgown, the innocent, yet tempting kind. The kind that made you feel great when you needed an ego boost. She did look good, as the mirror confirmed. Maybe her legs were a tad too white, maybe the freckles too many, but overall, Zoey felt empowered. She turned the kettle on, looked for matching socks in her duffel bag, and by the time she pulled her second sock on there was a knock on the door.
It took a while to register it and pick herself up to open.
She popped her head out, careful to hide the rest of her body behind the door. Jasper stood, thunderstruck, his chest moving rapidly. She swallowed hard at the sight of him, partially lost in amber.
“Do you want space?” His own shock mirrored her eyes with chemical clarity.
“Um, not necessarily…” Her reply came out in a mix of surprise and curiosity.
He entered in a wave that hit her like a ripple of softener and rain the door slammed shut. She stood there, heart thumping in her chest, pressed against the wall as he’d seen her for the first time. There was no terror clouding her features, just the sound of her heart loud enough for him to feel, strong enough to overwhelm everything but those inquisitive green eyes.
She liked to talk and he didn’t; she was a hybrid and he wasn’t; she steadied herself and he didn’t, allowing the magnetic pull he felt within to pull him close to Zoey until the distance between their eyes narrowed along with the space between their bodies.
“I’d like to kiss you without asking permission, but I can’t…”
Where is this coming from? She couldn’t control the flutter within, the lump in her throat, the violent heartbeat.
“I shouldn’t…” He swallowed hard as his hand slid fast on the white satin, sending impulses to her spine as he pressed a little harder against her until their cheeks brushed. “I won’t…” he parted to look at her, “if you don’t want me to.”
Adrenaline rush. So much of it that she nearly forgot to breathe, eyes jumping from his lips to his eyes, her heart a ticking bomb.
Holy Mother of…she gave in, parting her lips only to feel his pressing like an artist’s brush against her canvas, intense, smooth but contained until her hands, with a mind of their own, took hold of him and everything accelerated.
The kettle whistled. His thumb was throbbing at the hollow of her neck, rubbing up and down, pulsing warmth as his tongue conquered the depths of her mouth, hungry, consuming, pulling her into the warmth of him as if he mastered the balance of gravity.
When his lips left her mouth, she could barely breathe. “You shouldn’t have kissed me like that!”
She found herself gasping, caught between an array of feelings and trying to regain sense in his arms.
His half-closed eyes now widened. “How…how would you like to be kissed?” An alarming curiosity washed over him as he scoured her features for answers. It never occurred to him that maybe, just maybe humans did it differently.
Zoey was stunned—at herself, at the amber flickering overpowering her consciousness, at the enticing flavor of the foreign lips she found herself longing for. It took a split second to give into them again, surrendering to the downward force pulling her under.
He pushed her upwards, allowing her legs to tangle around his waist, and parted only to look at her flurried face, searching for reassurance. She did like being kissed. Giddiness took over both of them as they mirrored a dumbstruck smile and lightness. Whatever rush this was, whatever his lips brought, she wanted more.
“I don’t think I can feel my legs anymore.” Zoey’s voice came light from panting. He carried her to the bed and she didn’t untangle her legs until he was on top of her. She pulled herself in another kiss and felt her fingers, with a mind of their own, unbuttoning the many, many buttons on that damn waistcoat and many buttons on that forsaken shirt until she felt the warmth of his chest on hers. The shirt and waistcoat went flying as he leaned in to kiss the freckles on her nose and eyes.
Spellbound again—hooked on that fluttering feeling coming over her in waves of wizardry.
Giggling—caught between “what have I done” and “I want more” until he rolled to her side and took her fingers in his. They were holding hands on ruffled white sheets, their eyes pinned to the ceiling, their chests still moving up and down from panting.
“I broke the code.” Jasper’s words held the weight of the world. Detaching from her was not an option, although even looking at her now felt like half a sin. He squeezed her fingers a little harder.
Zoey found herself equally baffled, she needed to steady her own heart before looking at him again. “Is it forbidden? To kiss humans, I mean?”
“Any foreign romantic involvement outside the boundaries of the Alliance is forbidden, that’s why they send us in teams—if need be, we should only fall for each other.”
“Could you say I’m half optan now?”
“No one really knows what you are now!”
His words almost echoed, sending a different flutter up her spine as she fixed her eyes where the two curved ceiling vaults merged. They were both talking while staring at the ceiling. “Do you regret this?” Still unsure how the words escaped her mouth, Zoey bit her lip.
“It was a risk I was willing to take, I…wanted to take.” It overpowered him since she woke him up in her tea raid frenzy. He couldn’t tell her that, but he squeezed her hand a little tighter again.
“When you did that thing to me, what was it? I felt it everywhere, it…tingled.” She touched the hollow of her neck, in between her collarbones.
He knew
.
“I think that’s even more intimate than a first kiss on Opt, it’s how we express…affection. You just confirmed that you feel it too, your body wouldn’t react otherwise.” And just like that, his lips came back to hers, lost in the feeling that instead of conquering, they were being conquered. There was an inquisitive awakening in the way their lips locked, in the way they crushed against each other like waves of unanswered questions, not really looking for the truth but giving in to the craving. Neither of them kept their eyes closed for this kiss. They couldn’t possibly.
It was so easy getting carried away around him, straddling him as he pulled himself in a sitting position, feeding on his gaze, his smell, his touch, the intensity of his responses, the way his fingers gripped on her thighs and travelled like nomads on unexplored skin. She heard herself moaning, his pulse accelerating as if they were somehow hypnotizing each other.
Returning to her senses took effort. “Um…” she panted, “…I—I’m not ready for sex yet… I think.” He pulled his lips away at the sound of her voice.
“Whoa, I don’t want to sleep with you, Zoey!” Jasper grabbed her shoulders, mirroring her expression.
“What?!”
“I guess I could say I’m not ready to sleep with you either. Is…that something you might find…offensive?” He had caught her off guard and it was a little too late for her to hide the bewilderment on her features. “Do I need to say something reassuring now?” The protocol was meant to prepare him for whatever challenge he was bound to face on Earth but not for this.
Zoey shook her head a little too fast. She was still straddling him and that was one weird conversation to have considering the setting. “I guess not,” she lied. “What would you say on Opt?”
“We wouldn’t talk about it further.” he lied. “I would, however, like to sleep next to you, if you agree.” He traced a thumb on her cheek, fixing his gaze on her.
“Let’s…um, do that tomorrow.” She was still processing what had happened as she tried to regain some sanity, moving to his side and watching as he effortlessly reached for his shirt and waistcoat and got dressed in seconds. There was nothing remotely average about him; he’d frozen her, healed her, and ultimately kissed her like she’d never been kissed, like nothing else mattered—bless Metallica for that.
She stood up in her satin nightgown, not yet ready to walk him out. Her legs were shaking.
“Is this the part where you tell me we have to keep it low-key and we can’t be seen together?” In a race between mouth and brain, Zoey’s mouth had won with flying colors.
“I’m afraid so, not until I figure things out, anyway. I trust Alex and Lilou—Gerard and Aline are a different story altogether—but it would only mean burdening them with my truth. They’d risk everything.” He tucked his shirt in and straightened his collar.
“So this is where we say goodnight, then.” She stood to face him on her tiptoes, her knees weak and face flustered.
“Because you want to.” He pulled her close and smelled her shoulder, tracing his lips on her collarbone.
“Because I want to.” She tried to sound unmoved and failed. The truth was he had flipped everything she knew as normal.
Zoey reached to kiss him again, his lips taking hers in a caring move.
“’Night, Zoey.”
“’Night, Jasper.”
And he disappeared in a wave of blue.
“It was the worst of times. Period.”
Zoey Mills
Professor Beck locked hands behind his back as he approached Rufus. There was restraint in his features and contained madness in the movements of his jaw as he propped his hands on the operating table. He began tracing an eye over every wire connected to Rufus’s head and chest and threw a quick glance at the monitors, which showed a steady heartbeat.
He then zoomed in on Rufus’s kalenium band and steadied the IV piercing the vein in his left hand.
“I can’t have him on hold for much longer, Judith. His body needs to be strong enough to handle the magnetic brainwaves.”
Her abrasive voice came quicker than expected. “All in due time…”
Trenton Beck lifted his head to meet an expecting frown. “Mark woke up and he’s in training.” His voice lowered to a whisper. “He thinks Jesus has chosen him to be our mighty savior.”
“We should have taken religious followers all along.” The woman smiled and pulled at one of the dented wires, looking distinctly focused.
Beck spoke under his breath, cautiously examining Rufus. “They’d have saved us all the trouble, that’s for sure.”
What in the world did she see in him? The question never ceased circling the corners of his mind ever since he zeroed in on Mia’s love interest. Etienne had fueled their romance by giving them alone time in training, even insisting they had their meals together—he knew it. Never once had he been afraid that they’d turn on him.
“He’s strong, this one.” The nurse spoke tentatively, laying a hand on Rufus’s chest like a concerned parent.
Beck voiced his thoughts as he walked toward the door. “Break him.” He couldn’t even stand his unconscious presence.
“I’ll have him ready for you soon.” She confirmed as Beck pushed the handle only to step out into the corridor.
He took the stairs to his room carrying that red beard tangled in his thoughts, the decadence of Rufus’s blowzy figure and undisciplined manner.
Trenton Beck found himself twisting the key in Mia’s door and letting himself in. The room was untouched since she left, her closet doors open to reveal color in a magnitude of nothing. Gone. Gone like she’d never lived between those walls.
He sat at the foot of the bed contemplating her absence, digging his fingers into the satin sheets, tightening his fists around the embroidered edges. Betrayal was defeat, and defeat was inconceivable at this point. He was not going to be defeated by Mia—Mia, whom he spoiled with lavish presents, Mia who rebelled against his vision of a better world.
He got up, anger swelling at his temples, and tore his fist through the door of her closet in search of transient relief to deafen the ear-splitting roar clouding his judgement. He found none.
γ
Sam awoke on a positive note, her whistling breaking the lushness of her new designer bathroom. Its dark wooden floors only added richness to the ensemble of lavender cabinetry accentuating the elegance of the crystal chandelier above the standalone pretentious-ass tub. For as long as she’d known herself, she’d been unable to understand how women enjoyed a bubble bath.
Patience is a virtue, she told herself as she slithered in the most awkward positions to force a shower instead of soaking in utter boredom.
They were not told to shower without the kalenium bands, so she never took hers off, determined to take things as they came, like a recipe to avoid disappointment. It rarely failed.
With both knees propped in the tub, she balanced herself in the most unsuitable of postures to wash her hair. Warm head, freezing toes—catastrophic. Today was going to bring excitement, so yoga pants were in order. Over by the swimming pool, Lilou promised today was going to be all about teaching them self-defense, maybe even how to use weapons.
Weapons. She raised her shoulders eagerly. About time this got fun!
Twenty minutes later, she checked her tanned face and kickass braids in the mirror one last time and left the privacy of her bedroom to retrieve Zoey and Emma for breakfast.
“Knock knock!” She knocked and voiced her actions by the door.
“You’re up early!” Zoey was swift to open and she immediately acknowledged all the effort that must have gone into Sam’s hair. “Feeling better?”
Sam nodded like the eager beaver that she was. “C’mon, chicken, today they’re teaching us self-defense and alien weaponry, wouldn’t wanna miss that!” She winked.
“Good morning, sisterhood of yoga pants!” Emma joked from down the hallway, dressed to impress in an elegant black overall and white shirt.
Sam shook her head and smirked. “Is that how you dress when aliens make a call of duty, my friend?”
“I think her heels have proven their worth.” Zoey smiled and half covered her mouth to whisper, “And I don’t think they like being called aliens.”
They followed the lingering coffee smell to the terrace, Zoey trying to steady her breathing as she rubbed her sweaty palms on her navy blue yoga pants. Jasper was going to be there. A strong mix of anticipation and panic rose in her chest as she crossed the ballroom. She could trace the outlines of their faces from the distance: Mia’s defiant yet unsteady chestnut bun moving left, right, and center as she spoke; Alex and Lilou breakfasting with an eye on the intersats while engaged in conversation; and Jasper checking his kalenium band. She swallowed hard at the sight of him. The flutter was still there.
“Morning!” Lilou chirped and pulled a chair next to her, patting the seat and making puppy eyes at Sam.
“Morning, everyone…” Zoey’s initial eagerness came out like a deflating balloon by the end of her greeting. She spun around to grab a cupcake and pour herself some tea, hoping to mask the embarrassment.
Alex finally spoke, giving his intersat a break. “It’s 8:36 a.m. I gather you’re all showered and ready for the day, so…” he cleared his throat, “I’ll do the briefing while you have something to eat if that’s okay.”
“Aye aye!” Sam sure looked eager to start.
“Aline and Gerard are away patrolling and they will be for most of our time here, which leaves two of us to handle four of you because Jasper will work downstairs most of the time.”
“It’s gonna be like herding cats!” Lilou flashed a grin followed by an enthusiastic clap. In her blue sweatpants and white top, she looked even younger than yesterday.
Jasper propped his elbows on the table and spoke. “We’ll have to split you in two—pardon my language but there’s no way around it—Alex will take the hybrids, Mia and Zoey, to the lab downstairs for testing, and Lilou’s going to work with Emma and Sam. Since we’ll have to work together, we’ll take you through the necessary steps in order to defend yourselves if need be.” Emma felt her heart drop into her stomach.
Lost in Amber Page 16