by Lucy Auburn
Now that the academy is my home, it's time for me to defend it.
Even if I have to die three times to do it.
As we crash through the woods and towards the watchtower behind the Great Hall, I see the distant glow of fire up ahead. The closer we get, our steps falling fast with desperation, the bigger the glow becomes. It grows and grows, until I realize that it's more than just simple phoenix fire—it's a flame that threatens to burn down everything in its wake, consuming the buildings and the people inside alike.
At first I don't understand why exactly she's putting out such a powerful flame. But then I see the foes she's facing, and my heart soars. Petra is standing in front of the watchtower entrance in wolf form, lips pulled back from her teeth, snarling and snapping as she deftly evades Lainey's fire in an attempt to take her down. Jared Fisk in his bull form charges her, hooves stamping out her flames, horns nearly skewering her. Kade, of course, has a gun in one hand and a sword in another, and is valiantly trying his best to drive her back even though he's human. And while Laura McKinley isn't anywhere near the fight at the watchtower, I spot her at the front entrance to the Great Hall, prepared as always to use her bare hands to destroy her foes—or shift into her wolf form if need be to literally bite their limbs off.
There may be fewer instructors here today—Ocean Johnson is gone, as well as the main shifting instructor—but that doesn't mean the school was completely unprepared for the Grim attack. And they've beaten back many of Lainey's sycophants, sending them back to where they belong, driving them away from the students just as we drove them out of the prison. I spot at least one group of Grims hogtied near one of the dorms, a group of shifters standing guard over them, their masks pulled back from their faces.
There's hope for us yet.
If we can get through Lainey's outer circle of fire to break open her chest and take back her stolen heart, we can end her unnatural reign as one of the Risen forever. As we come to a stop at the edge of her ring of fire, I find myself wondering how exactly it is that I'll manage to sacrifice one of my phoenix lives in exchange for doing the spell.
"I'll go first," Headmaster Towers says, stepping forward. "That way you can see how it's done. Are you ready for your end of the spell?"
I nod. "Just as long as someone can protect you while you're out." Eyeing Lainey, I take note of the fact that she's squaring off with a lightly singed Fisk right now, who seems to have scored her more than once based off the blood dripping from his long horns. "I don't need to be close to her to do it. This should be enough. I just have to harness the energy of the death to power the spell, and repeat it four times."
"Then we can—"
"Dani, look out!" Mateo shoves me to the side, raising his gun and shooting a few shots behind me. I whirl to see an unmasked Grim standing behind me, her hair flying wildly around her face. She drops the knife clenched in one hand as the rounds hit her, stumbling back, blood dripping from her mouth.
Queasiness runs through me as I realize how close I came to being stabbed to death—I wouldn't have even seen it coming.
The commotion has gotten Lainey's attention, though. She's looking right at me; I feel her eyes even before I meet them. Their wicked coldness is devoid of any and all emotion—except hostility.
"I was going to get that delicious newborn heart first and come back for your used up bits of muscle and the heart of the blasphemer," she says, naming first Yohan and Headmaster Towers then me, "but if you insist on trying to stop me..."
"We do." Headmaster Towers' voice is loud and clear, fire surging up her arms from wrist to elbow.
"So be it. Sacrifice yourself for a stranger. Foolish nonsense. Your people will always be weak." Her eyes flick to the demons, to the shifters circling her ring of fire, to Kade reloading his gun. "None of you have a chance against me. But if it's death you court, well, I'll gladly grant your wishes."
Raising her hands above her head, she summons her flames. They dance around her in a circle—no, a symbol. Short diagonal lines run across the demi-circular shape.
Lynx says, "We've got to take her down, now. That's a symbol to summon straight from Hell—whatever comes next, it won't be pretty."
"So let's do this thing." I look to Lana, who nods.
"It's time."
She closes her eyes and forms a triangle shape with her hands, placing them right over her chest. As she does so, Kade empties several more rounds into Lainey's chest, and so does Mateo—but she barely flinches. Fisk scratches the ground and runs for her, only to swerve as flames jump up towards him. Every attack, whether by knife or teeth or horns or bullets, does nothing to her.
So I study Lana closely as she prepares herself to sacrifice one of her lives for the portal spell, knowing this is our only chance to get out of this alive. The burden, whether I want it or not, lies with me.
"I summon this life and give it to the power of the sp—"
Lana's voice chokes off in the middle of her sentence before she can finish sacrificing her penultimate life.
A sword is going right through her. One courtesy of a demon that disappears in a heartbeat—because the Grim who summoned it is the one Mateo shot, using her dying energy to kill the headmaster, the only one who can help me defeat Lainey.
The Grim dies with a bitter smile of triumph on her lips, blood spilling from her mouth.
Behind us, a tiger's roar rings out as Sam voices his fury. Petra dances close to the fire, teeth snapping together in her jaw, dodging flames as she surges as close to Lainey as she can get.
But none of them can do anything unless someone sacrifices four lives. And I have no idea how to safely give up mine—not without actually dying and all the pain that goes with it. Something I'm sure Lainey is more than willing to help me with.
"It looks like we're going to have to do this the old fashioned way," I tell the guys. "You all ready to storm into battle?"
"Actually." Ezra's voice has a strangely sad tone to it. "We had some other ideas."
Before I can ask him what he means, strong hands clamp down on my wrists. A rope is expertly tied around my knees and ankles. Suddenly I'm kneeling against my will, my hands bound together, every bit of me trussed up.
And Lainey had nothing to do with it.
Not quite meeting my eyes, Lynx says, "Sorry."
"What are you doing? And why?"
He won't answer. So Ezra does for him.
"We're not going to let you die. We'll be doing the sacrifices. All you need to do is perform the spell."
Chapter 34
"No." I shake my head, panic rising in my throat like bile. "You can't do that. You can't. You'll lose all your memories, come back in a new body—"
"But the soul bond will endure." Sebastian's voice is quiet, his ice blue eyes reflecting the fire of Lainey's circle as he watches the shifters try, in vain, to take her down before she can finish her summoning spell. "Our souls are connected, Dani. By fate or your powers, whichever it is. When we come back we'll find you, and we'll make new memories."
I stare up at Lynx, the cold anger of betrayal coursing through my body. "Let me go."
"We can't." There's sorrow on his face, along with guilt, but he won't look at me. Not directly. I have the feeling he knows that if he did, all his resolve would crumble in an instant.
Mateo reloads his gun, checks the explosives at his hip, and shoots me a roguish grin. "Don't worry, Dani. You'll know me by my excellent comedic timing, even in a new body. Love ya and see you soon."
I blink at him, scrambling to find a way to convince at least one of them to change their mind. "You can't say goodbye like this. It isn't fair."
Sebastian palms the top of my head. "We'll always love you, Dani. Heart and soul. That will never change."
"This is the way it has to be." Ezra brandishes his sword, eyes fixing on Lainey. "Our lives are meaningless next to yours, and we love you too much to see you suffer."
I look for someone—Yohan, Liam, Sam, Petra—to st
op this, to step in and untie me so I can use my own lives, so I won't lose them, but they're all mixed up in fighting Lainey, or protecting the headmaster as she heals and regenerates. If they look our way, all they see is the guys standing in front of me protectively, blocking me from their line of sight.
It isn't fair. I don't want to lose them.
"I'm sorry." Lynx ties rope around his fists and prepares for battle. Those soft brown eyes of his finally look down at me, and there's regret shining in them—next to another, deeper emotion. "Maybe it's selfish, but I love you too much to watch you die."
He's not the only selfish one.
Street rat that I am, I claim what's mine where I can get it: food, shelter, money, protection—and love. Selflessness is for people who have so much that there's some to spare. I'm too greedy and needy to be giving away what little I have, and I've fought too hard to get it.
I'm going to lose them.
But not like this, not to her of all people.
Lynx tied me up thoroughly, I'll hand him that. One day we'll have to find a use for his talents that is far more enjoyable for us both.
There's one thing he forgot: to gag my mouth.
I always promised myself, and them, that I'd never do this. That I'd never take away the one thing they have that makes our bond something approaching equitable.
The thing is, though, they've given me no choice.
Taking a deep breath in, I eye the four of them as they approach Lainey's fire circle symbol. Their backs are to me, silhouetted by the flames.
With all my breath, I channel the in-charge no-shit-taking tone I've heard fall from both Ezra and Headmaster Tower's lips a hundred times.
Then I reach into our bond and force them to bend to my will.
"Obey me. Stop." Their bodies freeze mid-stride, unnaturally still. Though their hands tighten on their weapons, there's nothing they can do to fight this—I'm the one in control. "Turn around and come back. You won't be sacrificing your lives tonight."
Their faces are blank and emotionless as they follow my orders to the letter, steps uniform and smooth. It breaks my heart to see them acting so similar to how they did when Meyer had them under his control, but at least they're safe.
I'm about to force them to undo the ropes when Yohan approaches, a frown on his face. "What's going on here?"
At least now I won't have to bend the demons to my will yet again; I've got Yohan's help. "No time to explain. Just untie me so I can take care of the spell."
"The headmaster is on her last life, and so am I," he points out as he slashes through the ropes with his hunting knife. "I suppose we could get some of the phoenix students to sacrifice their lives—"
"No time, and it's not worth the risk. Especially when I have eleven to spare." I don't look over at the guys as I stand up, brush off the rope, and face Lainey, fire and all. "She's almost done with her spell, too. Whatever she's summoning that takes this much power and time, it can't be good for us. This may be our only chance to defeat her."
Yohan frowns. "I don't know how you're going to get through all that fire alive. It burned me when I got close—it's not friendly phoenix fire."
Friendly phoenix fire, of course, doesn't burn us; our phoenix magic works together when we want it to—and it responds to our emotions. Lainey, I'm sure, feels only hate, so her hateful fire is primed to burn even phoenix like me.
"I don't need to get through the fire alive," I point out, my mind whirring, pieces of an insane plan falling into place. "I just need to get to her by the time I'm done sacrificing my four lives."
"Dani—"
"This is something only I can do," I point out, meeting the gaze of my most exacting and precise teacher. "You've taught me well. Trust me with the next part."
Yohan doesn't look happy, but he nods sharply. "You need protection in there, though."
"I've got it."
I look into the dead eyes of the puppets I've turned my demons into, their faces showing little emotion under the surface—unless you study them closely, like I can, because I know them so well.
Sebastian's bitterness. Lynx's regretful sorrow. Mateo's frustration. And of course, Ezra's resentment. They each have a little bit of their free selves beneath the calm surface of the obedience I've laid over them, and they're all unhappy about what I've done to them.
Well, they started it the moment they decided to keep secrets and make sacrifices for me that I didn't ask for. If they never forgive me for this, that's just how it'll be.
Facing them, I lick my lips and say, "Protect me while I do this spell and sacrifice my lives. Use your discretion—but don't try to sacrifice your own lives needlessly, understand?"
Ezra's mouth twists as he says, "I understand," and the others murmur agreement in his wake.
"Good."
I stare at Lainey's flames, at the shifters lagging as they try to approach her, the fire licking at their sides. Kade is nowhere to be seen; he must be off chasing down Grims. McKinley, too, is gone. They've opted to protect the weaker students, which leaves me on my own to face Lainey with my friends and my guys.
It's all up to me now. No one else can walk through that fire, die four times, cast a necromantic spell, and yank a heart from an undead psycho's chest.
I never wanted to be a leader or a savior, but here we are.
Let's hope street rats can do the impossible.
Chapter 35
It's a comfort to have the guys around me as I step forward into the flames, even though I know they're here mostly against their will.
"Alright." I scan the battlefield, thinking. "I have to speak the four parts of the spell shortly after I'm regenerated each time, so it'll be easier to do this if I'm not a charred piece of charcoal. Sebastian, hand me your least poisonous knife."
He does so, a bitter look of resentment breaking through his placid expression. "Yes, Master," he says, but it sounds more like a curse coming from those lips of his.
I wince. "Don't call me that." Grumbling, I add, "This is for the best, you know. I don't need eleven extra lives. You all are being very dramatic."
They don't answer, of course, because I haven't told them to, and they're currently under my control. My stomach sloshes with nausea; I don't know how Meyer did this for months. Keeping them at heel, treating them like their opinions don't matter, feels terrible.
The sooner all of this is done, the better.
We step between the lines of Lainey's arcane fire circle. Her eyes flutter closed as she reaches the end of the summoning spell, inner sight turned towards the place beyond the veil where the demons she's yet to summon await her. I feel a prickle along my breast bone, a little sense of warning that tells me whatever she's summoning is dark and dangerous. It's some kind of deep Hell demon capable of hunting down exactly what she wants: more powerful phoenix hearts, a hundred times stronger than the heart she ripped out of poor Reena's chest.
Behind me, the recently regenerated headmaster calls out, "You can do this, Dani! I've got your back."
I don't understand what she's saying until the fire in front of me dissipates, sucked away as if by an invisible hand, making a path for me to forge. Glancing over my shoulder, I see that Lana is using her incredible Red Phoenix powers to cut holes in Lainey's flames. She sends the shifters towards me through the circle, directing the fire until there's a path for all of us to take.
Fisk shifts back to his human form, rubbing his forehead where his bull horns were a moment ago. "Get into formation," he tells Sam, Liam, and Petra. "Dani, what do you need?"
"Just make sure I don't die permanently," I tell him. "But if you need to protect the other students, prioritize that. I've got my demons to protect me.
Four lives. Four deaths.
How I wish I could just use the deaths of the Grims we burned alive. Meyer could be lying about that for all I know, except that I don't think he was—their bodies had no death energy around them like Laena's did the night he used her death to escape. O
nly my lives will do.
As the demons fall into place around me, ready to attack, I tell them, "Drive her off. Keep her away from me—shoot her a hundred times if you have to. It's time."
Forming my thumbs and fingers into a circle over my chest, I watch as they surge into motion. Ezra's sword clips Lainey's shoulder; Mateo's gun takes out her knees. She heals super fast, eyes snapping to them in anger, throwing fire at their quick-dodging forms. The shifters whirl and snap at her legs, all teeth and claws, nimbly twisting away from her flames.
I have to trust that they can fight this without me. It's time to let go and succumb to death.
"I summon this life and give it to the power of the spell."
At first, nothing. I start to wonder if I said the words wrong. Maybe it requires strength of intention. Pressing my hands against my chest until I feel the beating of my heart, I open my mouth to say the words a second time.
Then, all at once: the crashing of waves against the cruel rocks of a cliff; the press of talons into my chest, ripping hungrily at my flesh to get to the beating heart inside. My first two deaths flash before my eyes. Pain fills me, radiating from my rib cage outwards, choking off breath and forcing me to my knees.
Lainey's flames lick at my skin, but I barely feel the burns. I am pain, a thousand pinpricks of stars bursting apart at the birth of the universe, overcome and unable to escape it.
I sense more than see the demons rush towards my side. One moment I'm all alone, the next I feel Sebastian's hand on my shoulder, hear his voice begging, "Make me take the pain away."
But I don't have the strength to order him to do anything.
I'm dying, after all.
Another moment of pain, then two, maybe three. I breathe in despite it all, pins and needles everywhere, wishing it would end far faster than this.
Then: brief, haunting oblivion. The space between stars, where nothing is known or knowable. I'm back in that moment on the cliffs, only this time, I'm not alone when I'm reborn.