“Good enough. What are we waiting for?” Nick surged to his feet and Kylie rose right beside him. He pressed Pause on the remote and they headed into the kitchen.
It actually took fifteen minutes to locate the hot drink, stuffed between packages of instant oatmeal. And the popcorn was well hidden in the vegetable bin inside the refrigerator, of all places.
Nick grabbed two mugs from the cabinet while Kylie filled the kettle and set it to boil on the stove.
After collecting butter and a shaker of salt, he set the timer on the microwave and pressed Start. “I need to have a talk with Steven. I found some gold bullion coins in his top dresser drawer today, yet he keeps hot chocolate hidden in his pantry.”
Leaning against the counter, Kylie laughed. “I’ve always loved Steven. He has such a grip on what’s important.”
“Yep.” Nick nodded. “He certainly has his own list of priorities. His quest for a wife being number one at the moment.”
“Any luck with Amy, his physical therapist?”
“Actually, he’s moved on to Nadine, his nurse.”
Kylie’s eyes rounded. “Wow, popular guy.”
“He seems to have his pick at the moment. And he’s confident his days as a bachelor will be over by year’s end. The interesting part is he doesn’t have an inkling who Mrs. Right will even be.”
“Scary. What’s his hurry?”
“Beats me.” Nick shrugged. He’d wondered the same thing. Marriage was a big step. A promise for forever. At least that was what Nick would want if he ever took the plunge.
“How about you, Kylie? If Mr. Right came along, would you be ready?”
Instantly, Kylie blanched. Her gaze clung to his and he saw her bottom lip quiver.
Oops. Sore subject. Nick inwardly groaned. “Sorry. Too personal.”
“No. It’s just that I don’t know how to answer a question like that. I suppose I’ll have to see when Mr. Right actually gets here.” Kylie’s lips pressed in a firm line even as color began to rise back into her delicate cheeks.
Pummeled with a tidal wave of regret, Nick exhaled to release the tightness in his chest. He wasn’t Mr. Right, of course, but deep down, he’d hoped she once thought he might have been.
Egotistical and probably not at all what Kylie would think. But whoever said emotions made sense?
“Understood.” He masked his discomfort with a smile.
The look in Kylie’s eyes grew tender. Was it the flicker of the light that made the jade-and-white rays in her irises shimmer like that?
His throat knotted with emotion. As he swallowed, the temptation to walk over and kiss her overpowered every other thought.
Not wise. Enough pain had passed between them. He didn’t dare propagate more.
Still, he found it difficult to douse the longing that heated through his veins. But as he looked into Kylie’s eyes, the intensity of her gaze sent a shock wave through his nervous system, igniting his synapses with enough electricity to light up all of Asheville. He drew a step closer, stopping himself just shy of touching her.
He’d made mistakes in his life, but pushing Kylie away had topped the list. Too late to go back—he knew that.
“Kylie, if anything had happened to you today, I would never have forgiven myself. I’m so glad you’re okay.” His voice dipped several octaves, emotion that surprised even him.
“Forgive yourself?” her soft voice echoed. “You showed up just in time. Being there probably saved my life. Something I will always be grateful for.”
At the slightly baffled expression flitting across her face, he clarified, “If I hadn’t been late to pick you up, that horrendous episode could have been avoided.”
Kylie stared openmouthed at him as if he’d just morphed into some dopey-looking cartoon character.
He narrowed an eye on her. “Don’t you get what I’m trying to say?”
“Nick, you’re not my caretaker. You aren’t responsible for what happens to me. Just like you weren’t responsible for what happened to Conrad. You’re one person. Not some herculean superhuman.”
Good. A better comparison then a cartoon.
He cleared his throat. “It’s not that easy, Kylie. My presence today would have saved you some grief, and ten years ago...well, we’ve beaten that horse enough.”
She shot up her hand, palm out. “Might have is the key phrase here, not would have. Life happens and not always according to plan, even if everyone is where they’re supposed to be.”
To some degree she made sense. Nick gave a shrug. “Something to consider. Although it feels a bit like a cop-out.”
Kylie just shook her head.
Nick leaned in, caught her gaze. “I’ve let people down that I care about, Kylie. I don’t know how to undo that.”
“You’re sorry. You made amends,” she said softly. The wounded look in her eyes nearly broke his heart. In the midst of his other mistakes, he’d caused her that pain.
If he could do it over again, things would be so much different.
“The past can’t be changed, Nick. Only the future.” Kylie’s gaze was intent on his face. She skimmed her fingertips along the edge of his jaw. “You don’t have to live like this.”
A future filled with fear. Fear of losing someone else he cared about. Fear of more mistakes. No. He didn’t want to live like that. But saying it and doing it were two different things.
Tears glistened in Kylie’s eyes. She withdrew her fingers, but she stayed where she was. So close he marked every breath, the rhythm of her respirations, the measured beat of her pulse against the hollow of her throat.
“Life is too short, too precious. You have to let go,” she whispered, her passion evident. She almost had him sold until more memories crowded his mind, haunting reminders.
His heart gave a thump. “Conrad’s life was snuffed out before he was even a man. How can I let go of that?”
“It’s not your fault.”
“Then whose fault is it, Kylie? You don’t blame God. Someone has to be responsible.”
She huffed softly. “There’s a maniac on the loose. He’s the culprit, not you. Can’t you understand that?”
“I’d like to understand. I’d like to place the burden on him and let go of that night. But I can’t.”
“So you’re willing to give up everything, your life included, just to remain a martyr?”
That sounded harsh. Still, Nick had to admit there might be some truth in what she said. But if forgiving himself was the only way to find happiness, he was sure to die a lonely man.
He brushed a lone tear from her cheek. “Not a martyr, Kylie. Just a guilty soul.”
And baring his soul tonight gave him an odd sense of freedom. At least when it came to Kylie Harper. He’d carried that burden too long.
“I was like you once, Nick.” Kylie sniffed. “After Conrad died and you left, I was hurt, too. For months I cried with guilt and regret while the rest of the town managed to heal. Finally, God gave me the peace that I longed for. That’s when I forgave myself for something I wasn’t responsible for in the first place.”
Nick listened to her words. She made it sound so easy.
“You believed once, Nick.”
His faith had slipped away along with his dreams of a future with Kylie. God was a part of a past that no longer existed.
“Please, for your own sake, get right with God. Let Him heal you. Let Him give you back the life that you’re sacrificing.” She paused, moistening her lips.
Nick couldn’t stop himself. He slipped his arm around her waist. Kylie inhaled, but instead of pulling away, she leaned closer. He caught the scent of her sweet perfume.
Ignoring the warning bells in his brain, he slid his thumb up over her chin and back into her hair. On a shaky sigh, Kylie parted her lips, but didn’t speak.
Still cupping her face, he leaned in and kissed her on the cheek, then on the tip of her nose. As his lips hovered over hers, he whispered, “You know I’ll always care—”
Kylie’s hand came between them. She pressed her fingers over his lips, halting the words. “Don’t say any more, Nick. You have no plans for a future here. No future with me.”
The whistle of the teakettle lit the air and shattered the moment.
Pulling away, Nick turned and switched off the stove.
When he turned back to Kylie, she was busy with the popcorn, pouring it in the bowl.
Regret and sorrow hit like a sucker punch in his gut. He mentally kicked himself for letting his guard down and crossing the line of their friendship.
Inappropriate and pointless. No matter how hard he tried, he could never be the person he once was.
* * *
As midnight rolled around, Kylie shifted her position on the love seat, trying to stay focused on the movie, which was quickly becoming an unbearable undertaking. A cute love story about reunited lovers. Just what she didn’t need tonight.
She blew out a sigh.
An action adventure or thriller sounded better all the time.
True love only happens in the movies. She ignored the cynical thought. She hadn’t completely given up on love, but also couldn’t ignore the man on the next sofa, who was more prepared to run than pick up the pieces of their life and start all over again.
A gentle snore escaped Nick. With arms folded across his chest and feet propped on the coffee table, he looked way too relaxed for someone with so many regrets.
And those regrets were making her life miserable.
Shaking off the dark thoughts, Kylie centered her attention on the movie, but not before a wave of emotion burned in her eyes.
Nick held the guilt of Conrad’s death like a man trying to hold up a burning building, clinging to the very thing that would destroy him.
And she couldn’t help him with that battle he fought within himself.
A fist tightened around her heart. She needed to keep that fact in the forefront of her mind. She couldn’t change Nick Bentley.
Closing her eyes, she lifted a prayer for God’s mercy in his life.
“Is the movie over already?”
Kylie’s eyes blinked open. Straightening in her seat, she glanced over at the TV, surprised to see he was right. “I guess it is.”
“So you were dozing, too?”
Biting her lip, she looked back at him. “Just resting.”
Actually pouting, but she’d spare him that information.
“That good, huh?” he asked with a coltish grin.
A story about love, joy and a happy ending. A little too good at the moment. “It was enjoyable. I’ve just had a long day.”
“No kidding.” Nick dropped his feet to the floor, tilted forward and picked up his full mug of now-cold chocolate. He took a sip.
Kylie stared at him. “I can heat that up for you.”
“No thanks. Chocolate is chocolate.” He gave a satisfied sigh.
Kylie shook her head. What was it about men that one moment they could be heavyhearted, bare their souls, and the next moment they were carefree and amusing?
Here she was still mulling over the conversation they’d had in the kitchen and Nick’s thoughts were already on new things. Probably his next grand adventure to who knew where.
Kylie drew in a cleansing breath and let it out slowly. No wonder men found women so complicated.
“So tell me about the movie.”
Nick’s question pulled her back. She blinked. “Well—” Kylie faltered, her teeth sinking into her lower lip. “It was about love and, well...love.”
He canted his head. “More sappy than I thought. But I’m glad you enjoyed it.”
Actually, she wished she could have slept through it, too.
Nick settled back on the sofa, his drink in his hand. “What’s on your agenda for tomorrow?”
“After work, I was thinking about going to visit my parents. There’s a direct flight at six-thirty.”
About to swallow more cocoa, he nearly choked on his question. “What?”
Kylie shrugged. “It’s been a while since I’ve seen them and I’m up for some beachy sunshine. And I’m sure you need a break.”
Nick lowered his cup. “We’ve talked about this. You can’t leave. We need to get this stalker issue resolved before you go anywhere.”
Her stalker wasn’t the only issue she needed to resolve. The ping-pong of emotions she experienced with this very gentleman was quite draining. Maybe not to the same degree as the lunatic in the building today. But close.
Kylie knotted her fingers in her lap to keep from wringing her hands. Nick was making her crazy. He’d dropped back into her life, turned her emotions upside down and now had the nerve to sit there and act like a friend after nearly kissing her in the kitchen.
A combination of anger and sadness welled up in her chest. Inhaling deeply for calm, she managed to breathe through it. “I need a break. My parents live in a gated community. Even if the stalker followed, I think I’d be safe.”
“Not true, Kylie.” A frown marred Nick’s good looks. He sat up and placed his mug on the coffee table. Leaning forward, he rested his arms on his knees. “I told you before, you’re not safe anywhere. It’s best to hang around Asheville and get this thing resolved. Your stalker is bound to get sloppy and I have a gut feeling that we’re getting close to finding him.”
His prediction should have made her feel relieved. But instead her heart pinched harder. After the danger was out of her life, Nick would be also. He’d walk away and not look back, just like before. But this time, she feared, the void would leave a permanent hole in her heart.
She met his gaze, wishing he could read her thoughts. He stared back, concern instead of understanding in his gaze. She swallowed. “You’re probably right. But if this keeps on much longer, I’m out of here.”
He nodded. “Deal.”
Not a threat or a warning, but a promise. The more time she spent with Nick, the harder it would be to say goodbye.
She got to her feet. Exhaustion burned in every muscle. She needed sleep. “I better get to bed.” Tomorrow was a new day. Hopefully, her heart and her head would be more in sync.
Her pulse slowed. Nothing about her tomorrows looked promising.
Thanks to Nick Bentley.
Nick checked his wristwatch, yawning. “It is late. It’s almost one.” He saluted her with his mug. “Sweet dreams. I’ll see you in the morning.”
Kylie trudged to her room, ready to collapse in the bed. If she had one dream come true in her life, she’d wish for Nick to get out of his rut, forgive himself and start over in Asheville.
Such a simple dream, but one that tore her heart to shreds.
FOURTEEN
Amazing what a little sleep could do. Kylie felt refreshed. Tucking the horrors of the day before in the darkest corner of her mind, she set about organizing her desk in the newsroom. Papers and note scraps littered the top, a plethora of information she needed to sort through. She hardly knew where to begin. With all the latest breaking news, she’d gotten behind on her other projects.
“Great article. Headline story again.”
Kylie glanced over her shoulder to find Max stalking toward her, waving the front-page section of the newspaper around like a cheerleader shaking a pom-pom.
“Every press syndicate in the good ole U. S. of A. wants dibs on this story. Our little newspaper has finally caught the attention of the big boys. Whoop, whoop.” He sounded like a wounded chimp.
Hoots and whistles from her fellow journalists followed, filling the newsroom. Max indulged them with a mock bow before sending off a saucy salute. “Thank you. Thank you. Although I can’t take all the credit. This wouldn’t have been
possible without Miss Harper here.” He made a sweeping gesture toward Kylie.
Shaking her head, Kylie almost laughed, despite the crazy truth. People were dying and Max was celebrating the news.
When the cheers and laughing subsided, Max plunked down in a chair across from her desk.
Although the banter had been in jest, she could almost see his head swell.
Maybe there was some merit to Nick’s concerns about her boss. He was enjoying the paper’s newfound celebrity status a little too much.
Even his crooked smile looked a little more dastardly than usual. The last time she’d seen him this happy was when he bought his used Porsche at the sheriff’s repo auction.
Making good on the misfortune of others. She’d thought he was kidding at the time.
Kylie glanced over at him and studied his cheeky smile. Maybe not.
She swallowed. “The town is swarming with media. I can’t believe other newspaper syndicates are willing to pay for my coverage.”
“You know townsfolk around here are leery about outsiders. Law enforcement is staying equally tight-lipped. You’re right in the middle of the mayhem—every other journalist is reporting from the sidelines. Even we can’t convey all the gory details, but theirs takes a backseat to your bird’s-eye view.”
“You mean duck-in-hunting-season view, but I see what you’re saying.”
Max howled. “Good one, Kylie.”
She wasn’t kidding.
Frankly, she was tired of talking about the horrors of yesterday. It was bad enough that with every undistracted moment, visions of the ordeal emerged in her head, bringing with them a shiver of panic. For just a little while she wanted to forget, not have the Asheville murders front and center in her mind.
Jiggling the mouse, she brought the computer out of hibernation mode and then gathered her notes and shoved a pencil behind her ear. Hopefully, Max would get the hint.
“Well, it looks like you’re busy, so I won’t waste any more of your time.”
Thank you. “I’m running behind. The managing editor wants two articles before four o’clock.”
Mountain Pursuit: Smoky Mountain Investigation ; Mountain Rescue Page 13