by Erin Hayes
He met my eyes and watched me for a long moment before giving a nod. “Glad we talked about this.”
I nodded. “Yes.”
“All right.” He slapped his knees and got to his feet, the chair screeching as he pushed it back. “I’ve got to get back to practice.”
I could only nod again. He noticed my change in demeanor.
“Are you okay?”
I gulped some air. “Yes.”
He looked at me for another moment and then gave up and left the room. Only then did I lean forward and allow myself to cry.
Chapter 14
A few days before the next away game, I went to the airport to pick up Noel.
I could have sent a car to pick him up, but he really was doing me a favor by coming to help me, and it seemed rude to push him off on underlings.
Besides, I was excited about seeing him. We’d been good friends in college and had rarely seen each other since my company broke up.
I was waiting at the bottom of the escalator in baggage claim and caught a glimpse of him as soon as he stepped onto the top step. He looked exactly like I remembered. Tall, thin, with a mop of sandy brown hair that flopped down over one eye.
He wore blue jeans and a plaid shirt and looked every inch the tech geek that he was.
I waved like crazy and threw my arms around him when he reached the bottom of the escalator.
“It’s good to see you, too, Madison,” he grinned.
“I can hardly believe you’re here. I have been needing someone to talk about this program with. I have the best idea.”
“Just what you told me already sounded pretty interesting.”
“So, I’ve cleared out an office for you near mine,” I began explaining as we waited for his bags to come around on the carousel. “I have lots of things I have to do for the team every week, so I won’t be able to work full-time on the app with you, but I’ll definitely be nearby for consultations and anything you want to talk about.”
I saw the odd little glance he shot my direction.
“What?” I asked.
“Not much. Just curious...” His expression turned uncomfortable.
“What are you wondering?” I asked flatly.
“Just kind of wondering how many—if any—of the rumors I’ve been reading about in the news are true.”
“Oh my God,” I exclaimed, too loudly. “Those rumors are popping up in San Francisco, too?”
He shrugged. “The Yellowhammers are a national team. Though, to be honest, I went looking for the news after I saw you had inherited the team. So it’s not like everybody you ever knew was talking about it or anything. Probably.”
I closed my eyes and shook my head. “No. Just most of them.”
“There are my bags.” Noel pointed, ducking past people standing too close to the baggage claim. I suspected he was glad to get away from the topic he’d brought up.
He grabbed the two bags he brought, and we headed out to my Prius. “You know,” Noel said, “I half expected you to send somebody else to pick me up.”
“Yeah, I try not to use the team’s money when I can do things for myself.”
“Even when the things you’re doing are for the team?”
“Yep. Better to spend the money on things like a new training app for the team. And paying the developer who’s working on it.” I grinned.
“Well, I’m looking forward to working with you on the application, then.”
We made our way out to the car, and Noel managed to wait to ask about Ashley until we were driving. “So you said Ashley is working as a trainer for the team?”
“Yeah. Technically, an assistant trainer. I think she likes the job, though.”
“You think she’s likely to stick around Birmingham, then?”
I glanced at him out of the corner my eye. “For the time being, anyway.”
Noel looked thoughtful. We chatted about Ashley’s potential job plans the rest of the way to his hotel, where we stopped to get him checked in. Then I drove him to the stadium offices.
“I’m having Kathryn send a car for you tomorrow—after that, we’ll have a rental pick you up the next day and you can drive it for the rest of the time you’re here, however long that ends up being.”
“You have an assistant, cars to pick people up, the ability to put people up in hotels for weeks on end. Pretty fancy, Maddy.”
“Well, technically, Kathryn is the team’s receptionist. Eventually I’ll probably have to get my own assistant, but not yet. And maybe someday, the team will do well enough to put developers up in a fancy hotel. For now, though, you get the Weekend Inn.”
He laughed. “It’s a pretty nice place, still. I’m glad you’re doing well, Maddy.”
Oddly enough, it had never bothered me that Noel had a nickname for me. Not like Jacob’s use of Mads. I still wanted to snarl every time I thought of him.
But I took a deep breath and pushed the thought away. “Okay. I’ll be in my office. I’ve left everything I have on the app so far, plus my notes on it. We can talk more this afternoon. And I’ll be around all the rest of the week. The Hammers have an away game, so I’ll be here working. Oh, and I almost forgot.” I pulled out The Football Guide for Idiots as well as the notecards that Clancy had made for me. “You’ll need to review this for the app.”
Perplexed, Noel took the book and cards from me. “You’re serious?”
“Afraid so. Welcome to the world of football.”
He nodded and then laughed, shaking his head. “This is so weird.” He flipped through the notes I left, and I knew what was going to be reviewed first. “Tell Ashley to drop by to see me,” he called after me as I walked out.
“Will do.” I couldn’t help but grin. He was so very besotted with Ash. And he had been, for as long as I could remember.
I hope she’s nice to him.
I INVITED NOEL TO COME to our apartment and watch the away game with us the next night. I hadn’t realized how much I’d learned about football until I watched the game with another novice.
Ashley had learned a lot too, though she had known more than I had to begin with.
“This isn’t quite the same scene as in college, is it?” Noel asked with a grin. “Aren’t you two the ones who threw an Anti-Super Bowl party one year?”
Ashley and I spun around to stare at each other and cracked up laughing.
“Oh my God,” I said. “I forgot about that entirely.”
“So did I,” Ashley howled. “Wow. That seems like a really long time ago now.”
A referee’s call on the field grabbed my attention, and I jumped off the couch, yelling, “No! That’s not right!”
“That’s a penalty flag, right?” Noel asked.
“Yeah,” I said, pointing to the yellow flag on the field. “And it’s wrong.”
“So, like a foul?”
“Exactly,” Ashley confirmed.
Coach Carrie threw down her own red flag.
“Oh, good,” Ashley breathed.
“Is that really your team’s coach?” Noel asked.
“It is, and I’m glad she’s challenging the ref’s decision. It might not do any good, but she knows what she’s doing.” I leaned forward to watch carefully. It seemed to be going well. Carrie was calmly discussing the situation with a ref.
But then Rodney strode over and pushed his way into the conversation.
Over the image, the announcers were discussing the player’s interruption.
“I guess we’ll just have to see if Coach Drew is man enough to keep her team in line.” The announcer acted as if he’d made a hugely funny joke. But one of the other announcers on the show was a woman, and although she kept a pleasant smile plastered to her face, the camera caught her rolling her eyes before moving on to her analysis.
“It looks like coach Carrie Drew is sending Rodney Nguyen back to his position on the field,” she said. “But I would guess that the argument was lost from the moment Nguyen stepped in. The referee looked
like he might be listening to Drew until her player showed up.”
I shook my head and rubbed my eyes. “Oh, Rodney, Rodney, Rodney.”
Noel frowned at me. “That’s one of the ones the rumors are about. Is it true?”
“She wishes,” Ashley interjected.
“Hell, I don’t know what I wish.” I watched as game-play started up again. “No, that’s not entirely true. I want my team to play well and do well, and I want the business that is my team to be a real money-maker. I want to grow the business so that it takes care of everyone involved in it. I’d be able to offer Coach Drew more money. I’d like to pay both of you more money.” I gestured at my friends. “So that’s my wish.”
“I’d like all that, too,” Ashley announced. “Especially the more money part. But right now, all we can do is focus on watching the game. So let’s see how the Hammers do.” She moved to the kitchen, returning with a bottle of wine. “And, while we’re watching the Hammers, we can get hammered.”
I rolled my eyes at her pun, until she followed it up with, “Although I suppose getting Hammered is your specialty.”
I picked up a pillow from the couch and threw it at her. “Shut up and bring me wine,” I said, but we were all laughing.
The longer we watched the game, however, the quieter I got. For the first time ever, I really saw what my guys meant about them not playing as a team. And I could pinpoint the exact source of that disunity.
Rodney.
He was the one who wasn’t playing as well as he should. He was hogging the ball, showing off instead of playing to win, and even I recognized his refusal to follow the various plays he was supposed to be running.
I recognized those plays in part because Noel and I had been programming them into the app.
“Hey,” Noel said after one particularly good play that Rodney almost screwed up. “Wasn’t that the same play we installed yesterday?”
“It sure was.” Ignoring the fact that Rodney hadn’t done his part right, I said, “Can you imagine how amazing it would be if they were able to practice how the New Orleans team would have responded to it?”
“This app is going to be amazing,” Noel agreed.
“You know, Madison,” Ashley said, “you might be able to sell the program and use the proceeds to become your team’s own sponsor.”
“No way in hell. I’m keeping that for us for a while. I don’t want another team to use it to gain any advantage over us.”
“That’s the plan,” Noel agreed. He watched the game a little bit longer. “But it seems like the whole game would go better if that guy would run the plays he’s been given.” He pointed to Rodney.
“Yeah,” I sighed. “Somebody’s gonna have to do something about him.”
My stomach twisted at the thought. I was afraid, of course, that the someone who needed to deal with Rodney would end up being me. I lucked out, though, and the next day, realized that I had someone else taking care of all that for me.
I HAD BEEN WORKING in my office all morning long when I got a text from Clancy asking if I wanted to go to lunch.
I replied with: Sure. Meet you in the physical therapy room?
His text came back a minute later. Either there or in the locker room.
He still had another game to sit out before the doctors would even consider clearing him to play again, so I assumed he would probably be in the therapy room. But the locker room was on my way, so I thought I’d stop by there first.
Once again, I opened the door to discover that anything being said inside was almost completely blocked from the outside.
I heard someone walking, and I peered down the hall outside the locker room to find Clancy walking toward me. I held my finger up to my lips, shushing him silently. I waved Clancy over, not because I necessarily wanted him to spy with me, but because I needed to know what was going on, and I didn’t know how to send Clancy away without making a lot of noise.
I was a little surprised by how quietly the big man tiptoed up to me.
From inside the dressing room, I heard Carrie Drew’s voice. “You have absolutely no reason to behave like that,” the coach was saying. “We won last night, but that win had nothing to do with you. You have been a liability to this team since before I started coaching.”
Damn. That was a pretty rough statement.
“What are you going to do about it?” It was Rodney’s voice. I couldn’t see him, but I imagined him with one hip cocked out, his arms crossed, looking defiant.
“You’re a good player. I don’t want to have to bench you for the rest of the season.”
“Good.”
“But make no mistake,” Carrie continued. “If you don’t show me that you’re a good team player, I won’t hesitate to do exactly that.”
“You just said I’m a good player.”
“And you know damn good and well that good players who don’t play as part of the team don’t stay on the team.”
Rodney didn’t respond to that one. I glanced up at Clancy, who was frowning fiercely.
“I’ll play better.” Rodney’s voice was soft, but sincere.
“I know what’s going on right now has to be difficult for you,” Carrie said. “But you have to keep your head in the game.”
“I will. My personal life—”
“—can stay off the field.” I imagined Carrie leaning in close to Rodney. “There is nothing that could ever happen in your personal life that should disrupt your playing. Except maybe your wife going into labor with a child.”
A harsh laugh erupted from Rodney. “Like that’s ever possible.”
I closed my eyes for a second against the pain I heard in his voice.
I’d been thinking he was being a jerk. I hadn’t really understood until that moment just how hurt he was by my inability to choose among the three of the men I cared about.
I was going to have to have another talk with him. I needed to let him know how much I cared about him, even if I couldn’t see my way to giving up the other two—not now, and maybe never.
Maybe, if I could help soothe some of his pain, I could help him see his way to being a stronger player for us.
I certainly hoped so, anyway.
But not yet.
Quietly, I took Clancy’s hand, and drew him away from the locker room.
I needed to find a way to keep all three of my guys happy.
And the first step to that was making sure Clancy actually got to eat lunch today.
Chapter 15
But the next morning, Clancy was the one who was trying to make me feel better. I got another text from him at the beginning of the day, this one asking me if I’d come talk to him and a couple of other players in a conference room.
As it turned out, it was the same conference room I’d used to talk to Rodney before—and the players that Clancy had meant were him, Andre, and Rodney. They were all standing around quietly when I walked in.
“Hi, guys,” I said tentatively.
Everyone nodded at me, and then Rodney said, “So...what do you want to talk about?”
I blinked at him in confusion until Clancy said, “Actually, I was the one who asked for this meeting. I think it’s time we all sat in the same room and discussed...well, everything about what’s going on with all of us.”
Although it made me anxious to have all the guys in the same room, I knew Clancy was right. I couldn’t simply continue seeing Andre and Clancy and lusting after Rodney if I didn’t talk to all of them and make sure they could still function around each other.
“Well, then, since I’m not participating in anything that’s going on, may I be excused?” Rodney’s tone was perfectly polite, and yet managed to be completely sarcastic
“Not yet,” Clancy said. “Not until I'm done talking."
Watching him take charge surprised me—but I suspected he and Andre had discussed it ahead of time in order to keep Rodney running from it completely. “I think it’s important that we all acknowledge what’s going
on here.”
I felt my cheeks burning as I considered what he might say.
“Clancy and I are both seeing Madison, and we need to know if you plan to, as well,” Andre said, unable to stay quiet any longer.
Rodney’s jaw clenched. “I’m not going to share her.”
Andre shrugged. “And we’re not going to give her up.”
“Wait.” Clancy held his hand up between them. “Ultimately, Madison is her own woman. She doesn’t belong to any of us. She can’t be owned. So all of this is up to her.”
Rodney sent me an anguished look.
But I knew what I had to do. What I had to say. “Rodney, I am so very sorry.” I took his hands in mine. “But I have to be with the men who have supported me through this season so far. I am so very sorry.”
“Yeah, well, so am I.” He jerked his hands out of mine. “If you change your mind, let me know.”
My voice was barely above a whisper. “You, too. There will always be room for you in my heart and my life.”
He gave me another look of sheer misery before he pushed his way out of the conference room without looking behind.
Tears stung at the back of my eyes. But then I turned around to find my other two men staring at me with understanding.
"I thought you needed to hear it all at once, from all of us," Clancy said.
"And you're absolutely right. I did.” I brushed the tears away from my face impatiently. "So now what do you want to say?"
They each stepped up and took one of my hands.
"It's fine with me if you see both of us," Andre said.
"And it's okay with me, too," Clancy said.
“We’re all in this together?” I asked.
“Together,” they confirmed in unison.
The warmth of their hands helped eliminate the memory of Andre leaving to get away from us as fast as he could. I knew it was foolish to be sad over Rodney's decision to turn down our offer to be part of the same group.
But I knew if I was going to have a solid team and keep Rodney part of it, I needed to be able to let him go—at least romantically.