“You want to see her, Teddy?” I know I did, and I didn’t like it.
“She’s pretty. She plays piano like me,” he said, his voice rising up and down in a rhythm I’d gotten used to with him.
“Come on,” I said with a grin, “you can go with me to let her in.” I handed him a towel and pointed out his shoes. “Go get your flip-flops. I don’t want you slipping on the slick floor in the gym.”
He slipped his shoes on, and we went to the front door. She was waiting, wearing a breezy, white dress, looking fucking innocent. Yet, she wasn’t was she? She’d told me she’d been with other guys before, and I wondered how many. Fuck it. Why did it matter anyway?
I unlocked the door and let her in, noticing her slightly cool demeanor. Had I been too hard on her at the park? Maybe it was none of my business what she did with her life, including who she fucked. Yeah, I needed to let her live her life. She was nothing to me but a way for Teddy to expand his song selections and make our band better.
Teddy ran right up to her. “Nora, Nora! This isn’t band practice. It’s to see if we like you. Leo isn’t sure you’ll work out.”
My stomach dropped, realizing I shouldn’t have said so much in front of Teddy earlier when I’d been talking to Sebastian.
Nora laughed, her eyes dancing. “Teddy, I can tell already that you and I are going to be best friends.” She gave him a big smile and me an amused smirk. “Tell me what else Leo says,” she said, walking over and tentatively crooking her arm through his and heading out through the patio doors to the pool area. I found myself pleased at her reaction. With Teddy, you had to get that he didn’t hold back when it came to what he said. You had to roll with it ’cause social cues and niceties meant nothing to him.
As soon as we stepped out into the hot August sun, Sebastian yelled for her to get in the pool with him and Vixen. I stood there not sure what to do now that she was here. I hung back, watching as she pulled her dress off, revealing a bright orange bikini. It wasn’t too revealing; it covered her full breasts and her pert ass, yet I couldn’t keep my eyes off her. I thought about the piercing she’d gotten last week. I wondered how it would feel in my mouth, how I could use my tongue on it to make her hot and wet. Pissed at my wayward imagination, I forced my eyes back to the pool, where I caught Sebastian checking her out, too. Fuck. Stupid, asinine idea to be around Nora in a bikini. Maybe we should have just had a band session. At least then she would have decent clothes on.
Teddy’s bony frame jumped back in, and she dove in after him, her body knifing through the water. While they swam, Sebastian and Vixen set up the net for a volleyball game as I sat and played my guitar, working out the beat to a new song I was working on. I stared at Nora while I strummed the chords, wondering what had happened to her to make her snap. Just looking at her, you’d never guess she had problems. She seemed confident, poised, and perfect, even though I knew from her list she hated that word.
Sebastian called out for me to play volleyball. I grimaced, dreading the thought of being too close to Nora. Whatever. I could stay away from her in the water, right?
“Who plays who?” Teddy asked, clutching the ball, his eyes darting between us, never landing too long on one person.
Before I could make a suggestion, Sebastian gave me a little grin and said, “You take Nora and Teddy, Leo. That way it’s the old geezers versus the babies.”
“You’re only a year younger than me,” Nora told Sebastian, her smile infectious and just for him. Had she ever smiled at me that way? She shrugged and swam over to my side though, and I tried to keep my eyes from caressing over her exposed skin. It was a normal reaction to a beautiful girl in a wet bathing suit.
Nora and I played, working well together, me covering the long serves and her guarding the front of the net. We kinda made up our own rules, being lenient with Teddy who would sometimes get upset if his balls didn’t make it over. Nora fell right in with us, encouraging Teddy to keep on trying, laughing good naturedly when we made a mistake.
I thought I might get out of this unscathed. Then everything fell apart when Sebastian served the ball, and it went up and over, heading for the vague area between me and Nora. Neither of us called it, yet both of us rushed toward it until we were right on top of each other. We both jumped at the same time, the waves of the water pushing the front of her body tight against my chest. I tried to get the ball while at the same time pull away from her, but I only fumbled it, feeling it tip off my fingers and veer off somewhere behind us. I grunted and fell back, my hands reaching out to keep her from falling, but I only tugged her down with me. We both went under with her on top of me, our bodies pressed together and our legs intertwining. It probably only took four or five seconds for the whole crash to play out, yet it seemed to move in slow motion. And as we both sank down to the bottom, I kept my eyes open, even though the fresh chlorine burned like hell. I wanted to take her in without her knowing; I wanted to see her face. She was as mind-blowing underwater as on top, looking like a real life, long-haired mermaid that I’d like to push up against the pool and kiss the hell out of.
We both came up gasping for air and she laughed, and I laughed too, and whatever anger we’d felt at the park drifted away. The sound of Sebastian and Vixen trash-talking us faded away, and I couldn’t see or hear anything but Nora. And with that came a feeling of being trapped and suffocated by something beyond my control. I got scared.
“I’m getting out,” I said, abruptly, swimming past her, trying not to notice her confusion.
Her face dropped, but I didn’t let it stop me. I left her there in the pool and went back to my lounge chair. Sebastian pestered me to get back in, calling me a baby for going under and getting water up my nose, but I ignored him. I dried off and picked my guitar back up, getting back to my song. After a while, they got out, and Nora announced she was leaving.
“Why are you leaving?” I blurted out, not sure why. I wanted her to leave.
“I have a Princeton application I’m supposed to have filled out. I need to work on it,” she said, nibbling on her bottom lip, like the thought of doing it made her anxious.
I nodded, but it was automatic, just going through the motions, because when she’d said Princeton, I saw how vastly different we were besides the age thing. She had a big future ahead of her at some ivy league school while I’d never finished because I’d been busy turning a run-down gym into a profitable money-maker to support me and Sebastian.
“Have you come up with an idea for your tattoo yet?” I asked her, setting my guitar down.
She looked a little confused at my sudden attention, and I knew I was acting erratic. In fact, I felt a bit crazed. Psycho even.
“No,” she said as I slipped my shirt on, her eyes moving over the contours of my chest and resting on my dragon tat. I twitched with the urge to tug her tight against me, like we’d been in the water, and beg her to let me take her upstairs to my bed, to fuck her and forget everything else. It’s what she wanted, right?
But, then, any guy would do.
“I think you should get wings,” I said, moving over to stand behind her. “Right here, like angel wings.” I ran my fingers across her bare shoulder blades, then down her spine, stopping with both hands on the curve of her waist. I forced myself to stop there. “You already have the piercing,” I heard myself say stupidly. Shit. Why did I have to bring that up?
“I’m no angel,” she said as she stared at me over her shoulder.
I tried to find the right words. “It isn’t just angels who have wings. All kinds of beautiful creatures have them. And someday you’re going to fly away from here and leave all this shit behind. You need your own wings,” I said, reluctantly letting go of her waist.
She blushed at my compliment, and I freaked at the tender emotion that coursed through me. I jerked away and took off for the door at a brisk pace, ready to get her out of here. Yes, I was behaving strangely, but I didn’t care. Something bizarre was happening between us, and I didn’
t like it. I wanted to stomp on it. Destroy it.
She eventually followed, grabbing her dress up and saying bye to the others still in the pool.
I unlocked and opened the double doors, my mind already thinking of calling Tiffany. What I felt for her was predictable and straight forward. No wacked out emotions there.
Before Nora walked out the door, she turned to me and said, “So, did you decide if you like me or not?”
“Bad decisions can make some damn good memories.”
–Nora Blakely
EVEN A FEW days after the pool, I still couldn’t get Leo out of my head. I found myself glancing out the window several times a day for a glimpse of him. I kept remembering him whispering his happy stories to me as we lay together, about him choosing Teddy for his band because he liked imperfect people.
At the swim party, he’d been aloof and avoided being near me. At least he’d decided to let me help Teddy, which I was looking forward to.
Staying with Aunt Portia while Mother worked in the city seemed to perk me up as the days passed. During the day, I hung out at the shop and helped her bake and wait on customers. During the slow hours, I studied the paperwork for Princeton and shopped for school clothes with Mila. At night while Aunt Portia slept, I drank myself to sleep, chasing oblivion.
On Monday, I received a text from Lina, my mother’s personal assistant, reminding me of my monthly lunch date with Mother. So the next day, I drove to Ricardo’s, a fancy Italian restaurant only a short walk from Mother’s downtown Dallas office. I’d been meeting her there for the past two years on the last Tuesday of every month. If it was summer and school was out, we met for lunch. If it was during the school year and I didn’t have too much homework, we met for dinner. On rare occasions Dad would come, but it was hard since his office was on the other side of town.
I pulled up to valet parking and quickly checked myself in the mirror. Lipstick not too bright . . . check. Blonde hair in a French twist . . . check. Elegant dress . . . check.
One of the parking attendants opened my door and greeted me with a broad smile. “Miss Blakely, looking lovely today,” he said in rolling Italian lilt, offering me his hand. “Your mother is inside waiting.”
I took his hand and climbed out. “Geno, good to see you. How’s your little girl? Sophia, right?” I asked. “Didn’t you tell me she was crawling last time I was here?”
He chuckled, escorting me to the double glass doors. “Ah, the little bambina is fine, very good. Goes everywhere,” he said, waving his arms around. He dug in the front pocket of his maroon uniform and pulled out a small picture. “See, she is getting big.”
“Oh, she’s such a cutie!” I said, gazing down at the smiling little baby that had tons of glossy black curls. She had a mischievous smile, and I could even see a little tooth poking through on the bottom of her gums. I looked back at Geno’s proud face inquisitively, my eyes searching for what happy looked like, felt like. I gave the photo back, and he smiled shyly and bowed, leaving me at the hostess stand.
“Miss Blakely, please follow me,” said the young girl at the podium.
I followed her into the black-and-silver themed dining area. Yeah, this place was swanky, but I loved it, mostly because it wasn’t a quiet place like most ritzy restaurants. No, at Ricardo’s not only could you hear the pots and pans clanging in the back and the loud Italian’s yelling at each other, but it smelled divine, like warm bread and garlic butter. Sure, I’d much rather be kicking it at Aunt Portia’s, helping her ice some cupcakes, but eating at Ricardo’s was a heavenly experience if Mother was in a good mood. Which I doubted she would be.
She was sitting at a round table by the window, gazing down at the menu, and with the combination of the sun warming her light brown hair and her cream suit, she looked almost angelic. She glanced up as we approached, and I automatically focused on holding my shoulders up and back, gliding over to my seat, despising myself for trying to please her.
The white-gloved waiter pulled out my chair for me, and I sat as fluidly as I could, thinking of myself as a flowing waterfall. If there’d been any posture judges in the place, I would have gotten a ten out of ten.
She’d already ordered me the usual glass of ice water and lime. I took a sip and waited.
She sat her menu down and arched her brow. “You’re ten minutes late which means we’ll have to rush this, Nora.”
I sighed. “Sorry, Mother.”
“I already ordered for you, of course. Chicken Caesar salad, dressing on the side,” she said.
I swallowed, thinking about lasagna, spaghetti bolognaise, and fried eggplant. Well, at least the salad came with parmesan cheese. “Sounds wonderful.”
She smiled. “So, how was your time at Portia’s?”
“Perfectly boring,” I replied, staring her straight in the face. Eye contact is a must when telling a lie.
She nodded. “Good. But, when school starts, you’ll have to stay at the house with Mona. Can’t have you slacking on homework and piano.”
“Of course,” I said as the waiter came and sat down our naked salads.
I looked down at my plate and then back at her. “Style of eating?”
She pursed her lips. “Let’s do American today. I believe we did European last time,” she said, picking up her knife and fork.
She watched me as I cut into my grilled chicken and romaine lettuce with my knife in my right hand and the fork on my left. Once I had a piece ready to eat, I carefully sat my knife down horizontally in the twelve o’clock position on the bowl, then switched my fork to my right hand and took a bite, elbows close to the table. Perfection.
She smiled. “Did Lina pick out your dress?”
I looked down at my Tory Burch green maxi dress. It was a bit more risqué than I usually wore. “Yes, she emailed me a list of new outfits to get for school. Mila and I picked this one up at Nordstrom’s.” I rubbed the jersey knit. “Lina said you’d approved the list. Is . . . is it okay?”
“It’s tasteful although more low-cut than I like. Either way, it’s much better than that horrible yellow thing you wore to registration, but we aren’t going to talk about that.” She delicately wiped her mouth.
“Of course.” I took a sip of water.
We spent the next few minutes in silence with our only sounds being our utensils as they scraped against the fine china. I knew she was finished when she sat down her silverware in the 10:20 position. I did the same.
She took a deep breath. “Now, about Princeton. Your application needs to be mailed by October first. I hope you’ve started your essays?”
I nodded. “Yes, ma’am.”
“Good. Your father scheduled your admissions interview the first week of November, so you’ll need to clear your schedule of commitments two weeks before so you can practice. Lina will be arranging for a coach to come to the house to help.”
I nodded. With only 7.9% of applicants being accepted each fall, even with my exemplary SAT scores, I’d need an edge. That’s where she came in, pulling strings to get me an unheard of interview. It didn’t hurt that my father had attended Princeton as well.
Mother said, “I’ll be staying downtown this weekend but once the new station director gets settled in, I’ll be home more.” She smiled. “Mona will be there, and Lina will pop in to check on you this weekend.”
I sighed. A housekeeper and a personal assistant. “What about Dad?”
“No, he’s busy,” she said, not elaborating.
The smell of a fried cannoli drifted across to us as a waiter walked by. I inhaled deeply.
“Mother, may we have dessert?” I asked, thinking it was a special occasion. Did she even remember?
She tsked and tapped her manicured nails on the table. “Absolutely not. That is a very bad idea. I hope you’re following your diet at Portia’s.” She shook her head. “That’s another reason you need to stay at the house. Portia is all about the sweets. She’ll have you as big as a house before long.”
“She runs a pastry shop. It’s her job,” I said curtly, not able to stop the words. There it was. My cracks rising to the surface.
“And she’s obese,” Mother added smugly. “Terrible really . . . probably why she never got married.”
I prayed for the check to arrive soon.
She cleared her throat. “At least Finn will be moving back soon. He’ll help keep you in line.”
I flinched and looked down at my barely eaten salad, counting the specs of pepper and bits of parmesan cheese, refusing to look at her.
Instead, I thought about how Mother still hadn’t said one word about my birthday. I felt a sharp ache, right in the center of my head, almost like a migraine. I pressed my fingers to my head, hoping to ease the throbbing, but it didn’t. Anger, that’s what it was, building and bubbling like a volcano and ready to spew out profanity and commit reckless acts. A small whimper escaped me, and I winced in dread, hoping she hadn’t heard. She hadn’t. She was occupied with her phone.
I heard familiar laughter and looked up, my eyes focusing on the outdoor eating area across the restaurant where two floor-to-ceiling French doors were pushed open, letting me see the lush greenery and pretty flowers that decorated the perimeter.
I could also see Leo.
He was sitting with three other guys having lunch and maybe a business meeting, judging by the notebooks on the table. He didn’t see me, so my eyes ate him up. He wore dark jeans, a blue button-up shirt and a navy sport coat that fit tight across his broad shoulders. Relaxed suited him, I thought, as my eyes ran over his tousled blond hair and scruffy jaw. He tossed his head back and laughed again, making my breath hitch. When would I stop wanting him?
He didn’t want me; he felt sorry for me. He’d made it clear at the park. Leo was a guy with other fish to fry. I mean, why would he want a tiny, little popcorn shrimp like me when he could have a Texas-sized catfish like Tiffany? I rolled my eyes at myself. Why did I always think about food?
He picked up his glass and took a drink, freezing when his eyes collided with mine.
Very Bad Things Page 9