by Holt, Layla
Then she noticed his odd stance. He had his back to the wall and his hands raised in the air as if surrendering. Everyone in the room seemed to have noticed Jaime at the same time as she did. A hush fell over the room before Jaime’s deep voice pierced the silence.
“No one needs to get hurt. We’ll do as you say.”
Ariana shot to her feet as it dawned on her what was happening. Jaime’s mind had transported him to that horrible time in Afghanistan. She knew all about PTSD as a lot of their soldiers had dealt with it after tours of war-torn countries.
Dax and Sala stood up as well and they all went to Jaime and formed a protective circle around him. He continued speaking soothingly, as if to convince the kidnappers not to hurt him and someone else. Ariana’s heart ached at the fear he had to be feeling at that moment because for Jaime what was happening was real.
They stayed that way until the episode passed, Dax on his crutches and Sala next to him.
“It’s okay, you’re safe now,” Ariana said over and over until comprehension dawned in Jaime’s eyes.
Horror came over his features when he realized what had happened and then a closed look came over his features.
“Are you all right?” Ariana asked.
“Yes. Do you mind if I go back to the palace and leave you to continue with dinner?”
She stared at him. Had he forgotten that they had arranged to sneak out early. Now, they had the perfect excuse. “I’ll come with you.”
“Fine,’ Jaime said and nodded stiffly at Dax and Sala before striding out.
She had to run to catch up with him. Outside, Jaime opened the door of the car and held it for her. She slipped in and snapped on her seatbelt while searching Jaime’s face.
She waited until the car started moving. “Jaime—”
“Ariana, I’m sorry,” he said, his features etched in pain. “I thought I was completely healed.” He buried his head in his hands.
Ariana inched closer, desperate to comfort him but just as she was about to wrap her arms around him, he moved away. Rejection stung, burning her chest as if scalding liquid had been splashed on her.
Jaime straightened from his posture and stared straight ahead. “It’s unforgiveable.”
“What is?” Ariana said, wanting to be sure that they were talking about the same thing.
“Embarrassing the royal family like that,” he said.
Jaime thought that the PTSD episode was an embarrassment to her family. What did he take them for? “Jaime, you’re taking this all wrong! Everyone who witnessed what happened knows it’s as a result of the kidnapping. There’s nothing embarrassing about trauma!”
“I’m sorry,” he muttered.
She tried again. “It’s okay, Jaime. No one would blame you for that.”
It was like talking to a brick wall. He sat unmoving and unyielding. Frustration welled up in Ariana at the invisible chasm that sat between them. She swallowed down the lump in her throat.
She wanted to grip his shoulders and shake sense into him. But she forced herself to be calm. One of them had to be reasonable and clearly, it was not going to be Jaime. Maybe he was still in shock and needed time to process.
They were both silent the rest of the way. When they got to the palace, Jaime asked to speak to her alone.
“Okay,” Ariana said, wanting to hope but fearful of the hard look on his face.
In her suite, they sat facing each other. She fisted her hands and sat stiffly, afraid of what was to come. She tried to tell herself that she was panicking for nothing but Jaime’s closed face gave her no hope at all.
Tension simmered in the air. Jaime sat staring at her as if he wanted to sear her face into his memory.
“I’m going back home, Ariana,” he said.
“I don’t understand,” she said, her mind refusing to accept the meaning of Jaime’s words.
“This is the end of the road for us,” he said softly. “I should have told you about the PTSD episodes but I hoped I’d seen the last of them.”
Ariana’s heart thumped against her rib cage. It fought for space in her chest with the air frozen in her lungs. It was the only chance she had to fight for them. “What does the PTSD episode have to do with our relationship?”
“You’re a Princess, Ariana. The people of Asencia love you and they want to see you with a man who deserves you. Not a broken man,” Jaime said.
Her plan to be calm flew out the window. She shifted to the edge of the seat as if by closing the distance between them she could make him understand that PTSD didn’t matter. What mattered was what they had. “How can you say that when you make me so happy!”
Tears spilled from her eyes.
“I’m leaving on the twenty sixth. Day after tomorrow,” he said, his tone cold.
The irony of the date did not escape her. “Please don’t do this Jaime. You’re blowing this out of proportion.”
He shook his head. “You’re the one who is burying your head in the sand but that’s because you’re a good, warm person. The rest of the world is ruthless, Ariana. I don’t want you or your family to carry the burden of my shame.”
She didn’t know what else to say to convince him to stay.
“You’ve been subjected to enough humiliation and I won’t be the one to heap more on you. You deserve so much better.”
He was like a boulder stuck to the sea-bed. He stood up and she scrambled to her feet. Was that it for them? He came to her and gathered her in his arms. He hugged her the way he always did but things between them were already different. Jaime Cohan was not hers.
Chapter Eighteen
Ariana woke up early on Christmas moaning and as soon as the events of the previous day came to mind, she pulled the covers over her head and shut her eyes. She felt disjointed, as if she had lost her bearings overnight.
Jaime was going back home the following day. What was her life going to be like when he left? Pain rippled through her as she contemplated a bleak future, all color gone out of it. He was just one person, but he had filled every part of her life, sprinkling it with joy and everyday excitement.
She had survived heartbreak before and she would again. Except that her feelings for Jaime were a hundredfold what they had been for Kyan. She loved Jaime with an intensity that went beyond anything she had ever known.
He was different and special and there was no way she was ever going to love another man as much as she loved him. It hurt. Badly. But she couldn’t stay in bed all day and, even if she could, that was not how she wanted to live her life. Whether she was hurting or not, she had to keep putting one foot in front of the other.
Life had to be lived. She took a quick shower and dressed, after which she left her suite and went to the family room. “Merry Christmas everyone.” Her mother, Daxton and Sala echoed her greetings.
“Where are the kids?” she asked Sala.
“In our suite, getting all decked out for Christmas,” she said with a smile. “They’re very excited by the cute Christmas dresses you brought for them. Choosing what to wear is proving to be very difficult.”
Ariana smiled as she imagined her nieces picking and discarding dresses. “I’ll see them later for brunch.” They had a Christmas tradition of having a huge meal together with the extended family. They usually started trickling in at ten in the morning for the brunch at half eleven.
“Where’s Jaime?” Dax asked.
“Still in his suite,” Ariana said.
She had hoped that Jaime was in the family room having coffee with everyone else. She truly was a sucker for punishment.
“How is he?” Sala said when Ariana joined them at the table with a cup of coffee.
She sipped the hot liquid. “Good, I think. I haven’t seen him since last night when he told me that he was going back home. For good.”
There was silence as the news sank in.
“I don’t understand,” her mother said. “Why is he going back home?”
“Is it because of last nig
ht at dinner?” Sala asked.
“Yes,” Arian said, trying to keep her tone matter of fact. “He thinks he’s an embarrassment to us.”
“An embarrassment? That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard,” her mother said. “Jaime is an asset to us and I, for one, cannot wait until he officially becomes a part of the family.”
“I don’t think there’s anything any of us can say to him to make him see that,” Ariana said, her voice heavy with sadness. The coffee became bitter in her mouth.
“Today’s papers are full of Jaime,” Dax said, showing Ariana two of the front pages. “Someone leaked the story to the press but if they thought that it would shame Jaime, then they don’t know the people of Asencia, including our journalists.”
From kidnapped to the palace!
Our very own hero!
Marry him quickly Princess Ariana!
She had to smile at some of the headlines.
“We all want to protect Jaime now,” Sala said. “After a very accurate report of what happened last night, I’ll bet everyone in Asencia is feeling as we did last night when the episode was happening.”
The conversation about Jaime was making her weepy. She pushed away her half-drunk cup of coffee and stood up. “I’ll go say good morning to Papa.”
Ariana felt removed from everything, as if she was a merely an observer. She went to her father’s suites.
“Merry Christmas!” Ariana said to a guard near the door and then again to two nurses seated in the small drawing room.
“Merry Christmas, Princess Ariana,” the nurses said.
Ariana entered her father’s room and shut the door. She plastered a smile on her face. “Good morning, Papa, and Merry Christmas.” She bent to kiss his cheek. He smelled of cleanliness and warmth.
She took his hand. As she sat staring at him, all the emotions of the previous weeks and months welled up inside of her. “Oh Papa, I miss you so much! We all do.” Her voice broke and she was ashamed of her weakness as sobs wracked her body. She’d always managed to be strong in her father’s presence.
Realizing how distressing it must be for him to see her crying and unable to do anything, she brought her emotions under control.
Then as she looked up from mopping her face, she found her Papa’s eyes open. Looking at her. She dropped his hand. “Papa!” she cried. He moved his mouth and a sound came out.
“Oh my God! Papa!” Ariana whispered. “You’re awake!”
He blinked and tried to smile. He tried to speak again.
“No, don’t talk,” Ariana said, her tone urgent. She got up. “I have to tell everyone. I’ll be back Papa. Wait here.” That was such a stupid thing to say but she didn’t care. Her Papa was back.
“Oh God!” she said again as she burst into the small seating area.
“What is it?” the two nurses said, jumping to their feet.
Ariana paused long enough to say, “We got our Christmas miracle. Papa is awake.”
“ARIANA SAYS YOU MIGHT be leaving us,” Queen Christia said as soon as Jaime sat down at the table with his coffee. “Permanently.”
His first reaction was to scowl but you didn’t do such things to the Queen. He met her gaze and decided to be honest. “After what happened last night, I feel as if I’m a burden to the family and that’s the last thing that I want.”
“Don’t say that Jaime,” Queen Christia said. “You’ve brought nothing but joy to us and to the people of Asencia. We all love you.”
“You carry people’s burdens and problems as if they were your own. That’s the kind of person we want in the family. See how you jumped in to help when the earthquake struck. An example of the selflessness that we need,” Prince Dax said.
“And you were a wonderful Santa,” Sala added with a smile.
Their kindness made him feel worse.
“Look at this,” Dax said and pushed several newspapers across the table.
Jaime read the headlines in mounting disbelief. The mockery he had expected was not there. He read a few first paragraphs. It was as if it didn’t matter that he had made a fool of himself in front of people.
One article had even interviewed a therapist who was inviting Jaime to be one of his patients. He shook his head in wonder and disbelief, and relief.
“My daughter loves you and we all see why,” Queen Christia said.
Jaime’s heart expanded, filling his chest. Before he could react, Ariana came bursting into the room.
“Papa is awake!” she shouted, tears streaming down her eyes.
Gasps followed her announcement. Jaime was halfway out of his chair as was everyone else as they raced after Ariana. Prince Dax muttered curses as he followed at a slower pace, slowed down by his crutches.
Jaime fell behind as they entered the King’s room. Dax entered and Jaime followed him in. Kind Ramona was sitting up in his bed, with two nurses by his side, examining him and speaking softly to him.
The Queen reached him first. She took his hand and knelt down beside the bed. From where he stood, Jaime could not hear her words, but he could see from her body language the swell of emotion she was feeling.
Ariana stood at the other side of the bed as did Dax and Sala. The King stretched out a hand and rested it on his wife’s head and then did the same with Dax and Sala.
He stood and watched the scene unfolding in front of him. Christmas for them was complete. That was the one miracle that they had prayed for, hoped for but not hopeful that it would come to be. For the next couple of minutes, tears were shed and hugs were exchanged.
One of the nurses left and returned with a glass with a straw and water. The King sipped on the water with no problems at all as his family looked on. He and Ariana exchanged a glance and a warm smile.
Warmth radiated throughout Jaime’s body. The Royal family had been through hell in the last two years. It was over now. He itched to hold Ariana in his arms and celebrate with her. But there would be time for that later.
The King waved the glass away when he had had enough and then his green eyes, so like his daughter’s, settled on Jaime. His posture went limp, as if all his bones had dissolved away, leaving only his skin to make do with standing.
Ariana was all royal but King Ramona, even in bed, reeked with class and grace and something else that Jaime could not define but which intimidated the heck out of him.
“Jaime Cohan,” the King said, his voice shaky and weak but surprisingly strong for someone who hadn’t used his vocal cords in two years
“Yes Sir,” Jaime said and took a few steps forward.
The King’s eyes bore into him. “When are you going to marry my daughter?”
“At the soonest date. Tomorrow even,” Jaime said.
The King gave him a tired smile. Just then a group that was no doubt his medical team entered the room and the rest of them had to leave. They trooped out and everyone excused themselves. The Queen and Crown Prince Dax went for an urgent meeting with their private secretaries and other senior palace and government officials.
In an unspoken agreement, Jaime followed Ariana to her suite.
“What you said,” Ariana said. “Was it real or fake, for Papa’s benefit?”
Jaime closed the distance between them and took her hands. “There will never be anything fake between us again. I love you Princess Ariana of Asencia.”
Ariana pried her hands away from his and threw them around his neck. “Oh Jaime, I love you so much. I thought I’d lost you.”
“I was a fool,” Jaime said and then drew back to look into her eyes. He needed to be sure that in loving him, she knew what she was getting into. “I’m not perfect Ariana. Not even close.”
“I know that. I never wanted perfect. You’re all I want and need Jaime. You’re the best man that I know,” Ariana said, her voice heavy with emotion.
He tightened his hold around her and she rested her head on his chest. He inhaled her sweet feminine scent and nuzzled her neck. He didn’t deserve her but sh
e didn’t want perfect.
And his imperfections had not stopped Ariana from loving him and they did not stop him from loving her. They would not stop him from making her happy.
There was no guarantee that PTSD had made its last appearance but he could handle it, as long as he knew that Ariana loved him.
MEGAN
Megan felt dwarfed by the glamour that surrounded her, as she stood with Luca, his family, her family, a few friends and Ariana’s people as they watched the solemn ceremony unfold. Ariana was in another part of the palace, getting ready for her wedding, as were the children.
She craned her neck to see better as the King took a few halting steps forward, to Jaime. He was a dignified and handsome man but with a kind smile. He had been kind and welcoming to her and Luca and his parents at the previous evening’s dinner.
So had Queen Christia and the whole family. But the highlight for Megan had been seeing her family, and Max, of course.
An aide handed the king a golden sword, which he used to touch Jaime lightly on each shoulder, while saying some words which Megan couldn’t hear from where she stood at the back.
The ceremony ended with the King placing a ceremonial crown and her brother became Prince Jaime of Asencia. Megan could not keep a smile from her face.
After the ceremony, they left the palace in sleek white luxury cars that took them to the church for the wedding ceremony. It was a good thing that her parents-in-law were in the same car as she and Luca had not spoken to each other for a week.
She thought about the message that had come to her phone.
Why can’t you leave him and go back home? He doesn’t love you. He never did.
Pain came over her and she looked out the window and feigned interest in the view of Asencia. She couldn’t think about that now. It was her brother’s day and she was going to celebrate along with the rest of her family. She was not going to think about Luca’s betrayal.
They did not even pretend to be in love as they walked into the church. What they had was quickly turning into intense dislike. She couldn’t do it anymore. She had failed and it was time to stop fighting for her one-sided marriage.