by Debra Kayn
Linda would not help them, even if she knew they were stuck together. His sister would assume they wanted their privacy, because Linda knew she was still hung up on Alex and wanted him back.
He picked the hammer back up and beat the metal shield. She approached him and laid her hand on his back. “Stop. It’s no use. Linda won’t help us either.”
“Sure, she will.”
Warmth flooded her neck. “No, she won’t. She knows...”
He raised his brows. “Knows what?”
“Fine. She’ll assume we’re together, okay?” She turned around, not able to look him in the eyes. “She knows how I feel about you.”
“Why didn’t you say something—?”
“No.” She whirled around. “It doesn’t change a thing. Don’t you see? We can’t be together.”
“I don’t see a single thing.” He grabbed her hands and pulled her toward him. “We need to talk.”
“No, we don’t. You belong in New York City, and I want to stay here.” She shook her head. “We’re going in different directions and there’s nothing you can say or do to change how I feel.”
The pain in his gaze wounded her. She slipped away from him. There was no use keeping the truth from him. She’d told him nine months ago, and she still stood by her reasons. People were too busy in the bigger cities and everything moved around too fast for her liking. She’d lived all around the world, and it was impossible to find what she’d found here in Seaport. Here, everyone knew her and people looked out for each other. Her parents couldn’t even keep track of her in populated areas. After getting left at the train station in Zimbabwe, taking the wrong bus home from school in Chicago and waking up in the middle of the night to fly somewhere else, not knowing where she was when she woke up had been frightening enough.
She would not put her children through those traumatic experiences when or if she had any. And she did want a family. Alex deserved to go after his dreams and live the life he wanted. Not be stuck in Seaport because of her. All he’d do is come to resent her.
“It’s time to feed the dog.” Domo’s announcement broke the silence.
She glared at Alex. “Don’t say anything more. Our main concern is getting out of this house. You have a job and a home to go back to, and I...I need to call the technicians. End of discussion.”
He shook his head, but kept his mouth shut.
“It’s time to feed the dog,” Domo repeated.
She walked between the fireplace and the wall and spoke directly into the speaker. “I don’t have a dog, Domo.”
Alex chortled and turned away. She tilted her head. “What’s so funny?”
“Maybe he’s had a nervous breakdown. A dog? You?”
She flipped her hair over her shoulder. “I like dogs.”
“Then why don’t you have one? You’d be the perfect person to be a pet owner.” Alex lifted his brow. “You know, the whole white-fence thing, you’re always home...”
“Whatever.” She stepped past him. “I’m going to take a shower while the lights are on.”
He followed her. “Sounds good. I’ll do the same.”
She turned and planted her hand in the middle of his chest. “I only have one bathroom.”
“I know,” he deadpanned. “We’ll conserve water. It’s the Smart House thing to do.”
She couldn’t help it. She laughed, while pushing him in the other direction. “Go fix us something to eat. You can hop in when I’m finished.”
“Will you wash my back?” The small dimple on his left cheek peeked briefly.
She closed her eyes and counted to five. Then she walked away. What was he thinking? They were no longer engaged. She glanced behind her before entering the bathroom and found him still watching her. The heat from his gaze scorched her. She slammed the door, threw the lock and leaned against the counter, wondering if she was shutting him out or her in.
He made it impossible not to believe in him. They’d talked about having children, saving money to add a deck onto the backyard and sitting on the porch when they were older. She wanted the same thing, but she also knew he wouldn’t be satisfied living here and he’d proved that in several ways. He hated her house, and he’d set his sights on being the best attorney in New York City. Seaport didn’t offer him the high-profile cases and prestige that came with winning.
In no time, he’d end up hating her and leaving. She wasn’t even important enough to her parents for them to stick around. For Alex to abandon her would kill her, so she made the choice for him.
She lifted her gaze to the mirror and covered her head with her hands. Her hair stuck out in all directions, and her mascara covered more skin than lashes. She looked horrible.
What did Alex see in her, especially after what she’d done to their relationship? She turned on the water, grabbed a couple of towels and stripped out of her clothes. The sooner she washed and ate, the faster she’d start feeling normal. Maybe she’d get lucky and Domo would decide everything was safe and open the house.
She stepped under the spray of the shower. Tomorrow night was New Year’s Eve. Surely, Linda would check on them. They’d had plans. The ringing of the bells at the courthouse was a Seaport tradition. Whatever it took, she would get out of this house.
She froze. That was not a statement she ever made. It made her more determined to ignore Alex’s desire to reunite with her. She would not tie him down.
Finished with her shower, she fixed her hair, brushed her teeth, and then ate while Alex took his turn in the bathroom. After putting her dish in the sink, she studied the house. She was missing something. Some small, but important detail that would help them break out.
“Domo?” She walked down the hallway. “If you’re there, answer me.”
If what Alex said was true, Domo still ran the house. She entered the living room, tried the door handle, and punched in the code on the panel. “I swear if you don’t open the house right this minute, I’ll have you dismantled.”
Alex walked into the room. “You’re going to hurt his feelings.”
“He has no feelings.” She leaned against the door.
His hair, still damp from his shower, hung over his forehead. Her pulse quickened. Her skin tingled. Her hormones raced. The situation was wearing her down.
She wanted to walk into his embrace, so she picked the hammer up off the floor and smacked the shield blocking the window. If they remained in here any longer, she was going to make a big mistake.
“Shan...” Alex caught her wrist. “It’s no use. We’ll have to wait. You said you go back to work in two days. Someone will notice when you don’t show up. We can save the noise for then, and see if we can grab someone’s attention to help us.”
Tears blurred her vision. She squeezed her eyes shut, not wanting him to see her falling apart. It wasn’t his fault. It was her house. Because of her, they were both miserable. Wanting one thing, and knowing she couldn’t have him hurt. Hurt deeply.
“Hey, there.” He pulled her to him and wrapped his arms around her. She buried her face in his shirt and cried.
She let her hurt and pain from losing him go. She spilled tears for the love that would never have the chance to bloom into a lifetime together. “I’m sorry.”
“Sh...” He kissed the top of her head and rubbed her back. “There’s nothing for you to apologize about. It’s not your fault we’re stuck inside the house.”
She shook her head. “Not that. Our...engagement.”
Alex leaned back and held her out where he could see her. “You’re everything to me. There’s not a morning I don’t wake up and wonder what you’re doing, if you’re happy.”
“Really?” She placed the palm of her hand on his chest. “But you love your life in New York. You have your dream job and you became a partner with the law firm you aimed for after graduation. There’s nothing here in Seaport for you.”
“You’re wrong.” He cupped her face in his hands.
“What do you mean?” she
whispered.
His thumb stroked her cheek. “I’ve decided to leave the firm.”
She flinched. “You can’t. You’ve worked so hard to get to the top and make your way in New York. Your life is there. Y-you bought a condo and have the lifestyle that makes you happy.”
“And, it’s slowly sucking the life out of me.” He released her and went to the fireplace.
Her heart pounded. The unease and tension in him scared her. He’d always been a force to reckon with. Confident, secure and positive, he’d faced his schooling, his first court date, and any problem head-on. What she saw worried her.
“Alex, talk to me.” She approached him. “What’s going on?”
“Everything.” His shoulders slouched. “I can’t—”
“The heater is now on,” Domo announced.
“Shut up, Domo!” She grabbed Alex and pulled him to the couch.
Nothing else mattered at the moment, but what was bothering Alex. She held his hand in hers, studying him. So caught up with trying to protect him from growing unhappy, she’d missed the sadness lurking below the surface since his return.
Chapter 9
He was suffocating. For months, he’d held his true feelings inside. He’d go to the office in the mornings, appear in court in the afternoons and then go home to an empty house with the weight of every dysfunctional family, every abused child, every kid appointed to foster care pressing down on him.
“When I left Seaport, I wanted to experience it all. Big lights, entertainment 24/7 and nights that never ended.” He laughed, but it sounded harsh to his ears. “But the reality is, by the time my workday is finished, all I could manage was to go home and try to find solitude. The children I worked with...”
“Tell me,” she whispered, rubbing his hand.
“I’m supposed to protect children who are neglected, abused and forgotten. Most of the time, my hands are tied in the judicial system, and I have to watch them walk out of the courtroom with a parent who promises change, but in reality will return in a month in worse condition than before. I’m frustrated over how powerless I am to protect the innocent.” He laid his head back on the sofa. “Then there are all the broken marriages. All I see are divorces and custody battles. It’s like no one knows how to work on a marriage.”
She raised his hand and pressed her lips to his palm. “You care about people, children, too much that you’re letting their circumstances wear you down. That’s what I’ve always loved about you. You can understand what others need and want. You’re not happy unless you’re fixing something.”
“I can’t even fix our situation,” he muttered.
She smiled tenderly. “It’s a Smart House, Alex. It’s impossible.”
Was their relationship impossible to fix too? He tipped his head. “You’re going to think I’m crazy, but I’ve seen enough of the fast life. I want to live in Seaport, where my neighbors wave to me as I back out of the driveway. People I’ve known my whole life are happy and care about each other. I want to make a permanent difference in other people’s lives and go to bed knowing the children who need a stable, healthy home are tucked into bed and told they are loved every single night.”
“You do the best you can, Alex. It doesn’t matter where you are or who you’re helping, you’re a part of the solution. It’s apparent in the way you do everything with passion.”
“It’s not enough.” He wiped his forehead. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, and I want to open my own practice in Seaport, specializing in adoptions. I want to find children safe, happy homes, where they’ll thrive and be loved the way they were meant to be. I want to make lives richer for parents who want a child more than anything. I want...I need to make a difference in someone’s life; a permanent difference.”
“Oh, Alex. That’s wonderful. You’d be perfect as an adoption lawyer. You have enough love to make so many people’s lives fulfilled.” She fanned her face with her hand. “Are you sure you won’t miss the big city?”
He shook his head and laughed. The tension coiled in his body the last several months unraveled, and he felt lighter than ever. “Not even a little. Everything I’ve ever wanted is right here in Seaport. It took me a while to figure it all out. Coming back and seeing the love my parents have after a lifetime of loving each other proves that it’s possible to find happiness.”
“You’ll do wonderful in whatever you choose.” She wiped the corner of her brow.
Hope grew. He could tell she was happy with the news, but he still had to tell her the most important part of his plans. “I want y—”
She stood. “God, it’s hot in here.”
“You’re telling me.” Alex unbuttoned his shirt and slipped it off. “The heater is going full blast. It must be a hundred degrees in here.”
“Domo. Shut off the heater.” Shannon gathered her hair, twisted, pulled and magically piled the whole thing in a knot at the back of her head. “He’s really starting to tick me off.”
“It won’t help losing our tempers.” He wiped his face with his shirt and tossed it to the other side of the room.
“I feel like we’re missing something important.” She stuck out her lower lip, blew the loose strands of her hair off her forehead. “The Smart House has every backup plan for all kinds of emergencies you can imagine. There’s a strict procedure that must be followed to go into lockdown. If I could figure out how it started, we could fix the problems.”
“How long has Domo been on the fritz?”
She shrugged. “About a month, but never to this degree. He announces he’s shutting off the lights when there are no lights on. The air conditioner kicks on during weird times. The oven seems to be hotter than the screen reads. It ruins all my cookies because I can’t tell what temperature I’m using.” She glared at him, and he wondered if she was daring him to argue.
“Well, that’s...” He shut his mouth. Now wasn’t the time to bring up the fact that the outcome of her baking had more to do with the chef than an appliance.
“Don’t you dare blame me.” She crossed her arms and pushed back into the couch cushion. “It’s Domo, I swear.”
He smiled and squeezed her leg. “Okay. Okay. I believe you.”
“Right now, I believe Domo is responsible for everything that goes wrong in my life.” She sighed.
“Why do you call him that?”
“What? Domo?”
He nodded. “Why not George or Bob?”
“When my parents converted the house, the technicians opened the computer’s mainframe. On the inside it looks like a complicated computer screen with hundreds of switches and lights.” She shrugged. “At the top there’s a sticker that reads, ‘Domobotics.’ Through the years, I shortened it to Domo, since I...”
“What?”
“Well, since I talk to him so much. Domobotics is a mouthful, and it made sense to give him a nickname.”
He stared. It made sense in a creepy way.
“Oh, don’t look at me that way. I know you think I’m nuts.” She grabbed the hem of her shirt and flapped the material. “I’m burning up.”
“Come on. Let’s go see if any of the other rooms are any cooler.” He offered his hand, and smiled as she slipped her fingers through his.
“Wait. I’ll wet a couple of towels with cold water. I can’t stand this. It feels like we’re getting roasted.” She hurried into the bathroom.
The faucet handles turned, but no water came out. “Domo!”
Alex rushed in. “What’s wrong now?”
“No water.” She pivoted and tried the shower. “This doesn’t make sense we just finished using the water. Why would he turn it off?”
“I don’t know, but everything seems to go in a cycle. We’ll have to wait it out.” He led her through the house.
“I hate this.” She leaned against his arm.
The kitchen, on the east end, opposite of the afternoon sun, seemed the coolest spot in the house. They settled down on the floor. He leaned his bare back
against the cabinet and sighed his pleasure. The wood soothed his overheated skin. He looked at Shannon.
Her flushed cheeks and the sweat-dampened tendrils of hair framing her face were his undoing. He had to do something. “Sit with your back against the dishwasher. The surface will cool you off.”
She scooted closer to him and pressed against the stainless steel. “Ah...”
She stretched her legs out in front of her. He tilted his head. Today a pale pink butterfly covered the top of her flip-flops. The delicate wings spread as if landing on her feet. Her dainty toes wiggled. Each nail was painted pink and for a moment, he thought the monarch prepared to take flight.
He blinked. “Are you feeling better?”
“It would be better if I was naked and laying in a cold pool.” She gave him a half smile. “I’m about ready to pass out from the heat.”
He leaned his head back. “Don’t do that. Tucker’s the fireman, I’m an attorney and I don’t think ordering you to wake up will work. Just imagine you’re in the North Pole.”
“God, I can’t take it anymore.” She squirmed beside him and pulled her shirt over her head.
He blinked and his body tightened, getting even hotter.
Her breasts, breasts he knew would overfill his hands, pushed against the white, lacy bra. He grew light-headed, and realized he was holding his breath. He exhaled on an, “Oh, boy...”
The corner of her mouth twitched, and she lowered her lashes. “It’s not like you haven’t seen me in much less.”
If he thought the kitchen gave him relief from the heat, he only fooled himself. He burned for Shannon. Her arm brushed his, and he sucked in his breath. She appeared calm and relaxed. Too calm for all the energy she put into keeping her distance from him.
“You did that on purpose,” he said.
Her tinkling laughter aimed right at his heart and held. He brushed wisps of hair off her forehead, and she rotated toward him. Her eyes softened and she whispered, “Maybe...”
“Ah, babe. You better tell me to stop now, because an invitation like that is going to have me kissing you until we both burn to ash.” He slipped his hand behind her neck and pulled her closer.