I wish I would stop talking like that, but that’s what happens when you spend too much time in sunny California.
“Who left this?”
He lifts up his shoulders in a half-shrug, as if it’s too much effort for him to do a proper one. Why does he always look as if he’s been trekking around America for the last few months? The guy always looks tired. No matter the time of day or how many hours he’s slept, the guy looks the same. If he weren't such a good hand on the ranch, I would get rid of him. Not only because of his tired looks but because he’s just clueless. He’s a hard worker, but everything has to be spelled out for him. Thinking out of the box, isn’t an option.
“But, you must have seen someone come by and just…”
I can’t even get the words out. I keep looking at my feet, and I’m trying to pretend that it isn’t there. That this isn’t happening to me.
My life’s simple here. Get a few cowgirls that want to live on a big ranch, tease them and please them, and then when it’s all done, I tell them that I can’t commit. I can’t. Not now, not ever. I tried a relationship once, but after my ex, Jessica, spat in my face about the idea, I promised myself never again would I ask a girl to move in. She told me that I love playing and never take anything serious. If that was the case, I never would have asked her to move in with me.
“Oh, welcome to the land of the living,” Aria sings as she comes closer to the house. I want to go inside and close the door. This never happened. No one left a basket outside my fucking door with a baby in it. The baby’s crying. Shit!
“Holy cow, Noah. I thought that she was leaving a basket of fruit or something.”
I grab hold of Aria’s arm as she comes closer, thinking that maybe if I catch up with the person, I can give it back.
“Who?”
She bends down and sighs, “Isn’t he the cutest?”
She’s joking. Sure, it’s cute or that’s what people always say about their babies. I steer well clear of them, which is why someone must have made a mistake when they dropped this one here. But, why would someone just come and drop a baby at my doorstep?
“Are you going to tell me who, or are you going to keep me guessing all day?”
My head’s throbbing, and the last thing I need at this time of the morning is to play guessing games with Aria. She’s bitchy because she thought that I was coming on to her and that I was into her. No, I was fucking horny. Dad always said don’t mix business with pleasure. I did, and now I have to play the price. She works with the horses, and I should have known better than to try and get it on with one of the staff.
“Some girl. She was holding the basket and pressing the bell like crazy. I thought that she was an idiot like me.”
Aria’s looking me directly in the eye, trying to figure out if there will be some reaction from me. There’s none because I told her once and I’m not doing it again. It was one night. I was horny, wanted to get my leg over, and she thought that I wanted a relationship. I made it clear that I didn’t. So, if she’s still upset about it, she could leave. There’s plenty of ranches around here. This isn’t the only one. Besides, she’s good at her job, and I pay her more than any ranch would pay her—which is probably why she sticks around.
“Look, there’s a note.”
I grab it quickly and read it out loud. I don’t need her to wind me up even further. There’s a baby outside my house. She lifts the basket saying, “You can’t leave him here all day.”
“Sure, his mom will come back for him. Maybe she left a number on this note.” I realize that I’m fucking talking to myself, as Aria’s already in the house with someone else’s baby. I turn around and she’s making those funny sounds, the noises that people tend to make whenever they see a baby. It’s as if they’ve lost their mind.
Dear Noah,
I know that we met that one night when you were in Vegas eleven months ago.
I can’t cope with the baby. His name is Richard, after my granddad. I need you to look after him for a while.
I hope that you become friends.
Please don’t try and contact me.
I had nowhere else to go. I need Richard to be safe, and he’s your son.
Candy
Holy shit!
The one-night stand… My hands are trembling and my heart’s beating out of control as I flashbacks of the night enter my head. Dan, my best friend from high school, was getting married. I was best man, and I booked the whole damn bachelor party—the hotel, car, and flights. I remember having a one-night stand, and I was pretty wasted that weekend.
But, I used a condom. I’m like 99% sure that I used one, just so that I didn’t get in trouble. Like I seem to have done now. Besides, Vegas is fucking notorious for one-night stands. I scratch my head as I now realize her name.
Candy!
That’s it. I kept teasing her asking if she’s ‘as sweet as candy,’ and I meant from the waist down. She can’t just come here and drop a baby on me. What was she doing during those eleven months? Why didn’t she try and get in contact then?
I avoid going to the living room where Aria’s still making the noises with the baby. I get my phone from my back pocket and call Dan. Shit, we’ve got to go back to Vegas. We need to find Candy. I shut the door and start making the call.
“Dan.”
“Hey, man, surprised you’re up. You were pretty wasted last night.”
Fuck the small talk.
“Who’s that?”
Right then, little Richard starts crying again as I pace in the hallway to avoid going directly into the living room.
“That’s exactly what I’m calling you about.”
He starts laughing. “You’re a daddy.”
“Look, it’s not funny. Some chick just left a note and said that I’m the daddy.”
“Shit, I thought they only did that type of shit in movies.”
I’ll say, but for the first time, this is happening to me in real life. I think that maybe he’s right. I was pretty wasted last night, so this could be a bad dream. It must be as I look up and see Aria in front of me trying to soothe Richard. I only have nightmares with her in them.
But, I’m not fucking delusional. There is a baby in front of me. My dreams are vivid, but not so fucking real that I’m walking around with this killer of a hangover. Whatever Aria’s doing to Richard, it’s not working.
Her phone rings and she starts walking toward me. “You take him. Maybe he wants his daddy.”
Again, Dan starts laughing. “Shit, you are a daddy. Don’t go anywhere. I’m coming over, and I’m bringing the boys. They’ll love to see this.”
Any other time, I would join in and have a laugh too, but when it comes at my expense it’s not fucking funny. I’m balancing my phone in one hand and Richard in the other. That’s when I notice something.
Aria laughs as she comes back into the room. “See, he did want his daddy. Good luck, Noah. I’ve got to get a job.”
Then she leaves. What the fuck is she talking about? She works here on the ranch. What job?
I attempt to put little Richard back into his basket. Every time I do, he starts crying. I still need a DNA test. The fact that Richard’s winding me up kind of proves that he’s mine, but it’s not enough to convince me. I can’t do this. Not all day. I’ve got a hangover to get rid of, horses that I need to tend to. My day’s filled with chores, and none of them involve looking after a baby.
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Fake Daddy
Book 2 in the Single Daddy series
Chapter One
Chad
Fuck, why are strollers so fucking hard to control?
I thought that with modern technology they would have made them easier, not fucking impossible. I bet my sister, Olivia, paid a small fortune for this fucking monstrosity. I was an IT guy, I built apps, developed programs, but that was fucking easy compared to trying to fold or unfold a stroller.
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“Do you need a hand?”
A guy asked, as I parked outside the pre-school for the last ten minutes trying to figure out how to unfold the stroller so I can take my nephew around in peace. I could just hold him. I had the carrier, but as I looked at that in the back, I decided that was just as fucking complicated as trying to unfold the stroller. When Olivia handed it to me, I told her that I wasn’t going to put myself in that straight jacket. Besides, I wouldn’t feel comfortable with Joshua being strapped to me. He was safer in a stroller. If I could fucking unfold the damn thing. Besides I was only an uncle, not a dad. Noah had taken on the role like a duck to water. He could write a book on it, along with Martin. They acted as if they couldn’t breathe if they didn’t know everything there was to know about being a dad. It was like a fucking disease with those two. They fed off each other about the latest bottle warmer, stroller and anything else that came out and they just had to fucking get it!
“I could do with a hand. These things are so fucking complicated,” I sighed and he looked at me in horror as if I had just spit on his fucking shoes.
Fucking parents, they hate cursing and anything that’s in line with the real world. I bet he’s already regretting trying to help me out. One button, one swift foot movement and the stroller unfolded so fucking easily. It was like watching Bumblebee from the Transformers change from a car to a robot.
“It’s easy when you know how to do it.”
He said it with a smug smile. And then he left my side to join his wife or girlfriend, whatever she was to him. The blonde version of a Stepford wife was covering her baby’s ears. As if he heard or even understood what I said earlier.
I nodded and said, “Thanks.”
He didn’t wait for my reply, as with the rest of the parents they started to head into the pre-school like a colony of ants as if their lives depended on it. I stood watching them, forgetting that I was early when I came and now I had a feeling that I was late.
“Shit!”
I looked at my watch and realized that I was no longer thirty minutes early. If anything, it was nearly five minutes until the damn tour started and I said that I would help Olivia out today and do the tour of the pre-school.
I suspected that she asked me because she was desperate. I wasn’t exactly daddy material, but she had it in her head that it would create a good impression for Joshua to see the place now. He was only six months old. I tried getting him to sit up last week and got bored watching him fall back about five times. I knew he wasn’t interested and as much as I love looking into his brown eyes and hoping that his smile was a result of us playing together. I knew that the only time he did smile was when he saw a bottle of milk. That was the only time that I saw him giggling and waving his chubby legs up in the air, ready to take his bottle.
I didn’t understand the whole thing, they’re only babies. It was as if society put so much fucking pressure on parenthood these days. All Joshua needed was a bottle of milk to make him happy. I heard the way Kylie and Noah talked about Richard, it was as if he was ready for college. They had a fucking map and once in a while they would consult Candy about it. She would simply nod her head and agree with them. She had no fucking choice. Every time I tried to talk to any of them about the pressure that they’re putting these poor babies, through, they would quote the same fucking line like robots, “The children are our futures. We need to make sure that we look out for their futures. Or we are all doomed.”
I grabbed Joshua in my haste and locked the door of the jeep. I was desperate to make a good impression seeing as I was taking tomorrow’s child around the pre-school. I needed to make sure the six-month old was ready to sleep in a different place while I showed him his future. I couldn’t believe it as I strapped him in and started to head towards the doors.
Everyone had a fucking carrier, I was the only one with a baby in a stroller. It didn’t take long for the pretty dark-haired lady to point out the obvious. She was wearing a polo shirt and her hair was tied in a bun so fucking tight, I swear her eyebrows were a replica of Dr. Spock. It was fucking frightening.
“Hi, I’m Sandra Hope. The manager of The Hope School. I’m wondering if it’ll be easier for you if you leave the stroller in the car and you use a carrier like everyone else.”
I nodded my head, thinking that I feel like leaving the stroller and just getting in the car.
I fucking give up!
The reality of why my sister asked me was starting to hit home. Mom was on her cruise. I paid for it because she was helping Olivia out full-time and she was exhausted, the stress lines were written all over her face. Olivia told me off and accused me of being selfish. How was sending our mom on a cruise being selfish? So, I promised to help her out as a result of my selfish act.
I sighed and the woman whose husband was helping me with the stroller covered her baby’s ears as if she expected me to cuss again. I would do if I weren't too busy thinking about how the fuck I was going to fold it again.
I gave Doctor Spock’s sister a fake smile as I turned around to get the fuck out of here. I wanted to take ‘tomorrow’s child’ to the ice-cream parlor while I had an ice-cream cone and I would give him a couple bottles of milk. That would be his treat for going out for the day and I would be showing him his real future... eating ice-cream whenever it was too early to have a bottle of beer.
“Come on Joshua, let’s put you in the carrier.”
Doctor Spock’s sister ran after me, “Don’t worry about that. Look, I’ve got a spare carrier, you can just put him in that.”
Again, I put on another fake smile as I looked at the straight jacket that was called a baby carrier.
“You can just park the stroller over there so it’s out of the way.”
I push the stroller to the door and I wasn’t looking where I was going, nearly bashing into another stroller.
She was tall and had dark hair and sky blue eyes. If I wasn’t pissed I would have tried to flirt with her, but I was fucking tired and it was only nine. Shit, I bet the ice-cream store isn’t open yet. Too damn early for all this shit.
I shook my head, “You can’t go in with strollers. I just wasted ten minutes trying to unfold mine.”
“I just spent fifteen minutes with mine. But you’ve got the new Bugaboo Donkey Mono Stroller. Nice.” She’s nodding her head, while I stood here wondering if she was speaking English or that secret language parents speak. But then I realized, as we both moved to the side, that she was admiring the stroller from hell.
“Yeah,” I stood so fucking close to her. Forgetting that I was here for Joshua and I was trying to make an impression.
Sandra rushed up to us as the mystery sexy lady locked eyes with mine. We stood in the middle of the hallway, not thinking about the tour, but obviously thinking about what we could be doing instead. Shit, with those breasts, all of a sudden I felt like drinking fucking milk.
“The pair of you are disrupting the tour. Can you just leave the strollers and hold the babies? I don’t have time for you to put on the carrier.”
The sultry dark-haired woman who I was standing next to smiled. The same way that I was doing earlier... fuck it’s infectious.
“Yes, we can do that.”
Sandra clapped her hands, “good,” then turned to face the other parents. The same woman who’s husband helped me with the stroller was looking and tutting at me. God, she hated me and she didn’t even fucking know me.
I smiled at the dark-haired woman and said, “Chad.”
She nodded, “Ivy.”
Even her name was fucking sexy. I was going to hate the tour, but now I had the impression that I was going to fucking love it. I had company. Not my baby nephew. But the hot seductress that was by my side. And her name was Ivy.
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Book 3 in the Single Brother series.
Accidental Daddy…
I never wanted to be a da
ddy...now I'm left holding a baby!
Six months ago, my ex-wife said that she wanted a baby, so I wanted out of our marriage.
When I saw her back in town, strolling into a fertility clinic, I had to find out what she was up to. I'm no James Bond, but I followed her into the clinic and sat in the waiting room.
I was too distracted to pay attention to the annoying girl next to me who wouldn't stop talking.
She announced that she needed to go to the bathroom and I was relieved that she was leaving my side, besides it had nothing to do with me.
When my ex-came out of the doctor's office, I jumped up and followed. Until the nurse called me and said I'd forgotten something.
I looked back and realized that she was talking about a baby.
The girl`s baby.
Not mine.
The nurse accused me of being with the girl, just because she saw us talking. I made a snap decision...I picked it up and took it home. Now, I’m a daddy by accident, and I have to find the girl, to return her baby. I didn’t want one with my ex, and I certainly don’t want one with a stranger...or do I?
Author's Note:
Dan is Noah's best friend from the novella, Single Daddy. Book 1 doesn't have to be read to enjoy Book 3. They are all standalone novellas. This novella is short and steamy with enough sexiness for you to enjoy.
Chapter One
Dan
My work came tumbling down from the time I admitted that I wasn’t ready for and that was a baby. We’d just gotten married and she wanted us to commit to a date to start trying for a baby. We'd been living together five years before we got married and the topic had never come up. Until, we went on honeymoon and she fucking ruined it by talking about a baby. I froze. My once ever ready cock became dead. It was as if it’d automatically turned off and no amount of batteries was going to get it back up again.
That was when things started to go bad for us.
I smiled, put on a face on honeymoon, trying to distract her with the sea, sand and trying to have sex, but I fucking couldn't. Every single time, we were just about to do it, she would smile and say, ‘This could be it!'
Sext Me (Accidental Stepbrother Book 2) Page 14