I want to tell him about my breakup and everything that’s been on my mind, from the orgasms to the loneliness, but I can’t. Not yet. I’ve just met him and this is all happening too fast. I shrug. “It’s nothing. But right now I need to go.” I kiss him one more time and gently push him away. “I’ll be back tonight. How does Thai food sound?”
“Sounds perfect.”
I kiss him one more time and pull myself away from him. After this morning, I can’t believe it but I’m actually happy that I’ll get to see him again tonight.
24
Clay
Who am I? I don’t even recognize myself anymore. Val’s been gone for an hour and I think I might miss her. My bed feels cold and all I want to do is turn around into her and hold her in my arms. It’s a strange feeling, and I’m not sure I like it.
Get a grip. This isn’t me. First, I go out for the night and I can’t even look at another woman, and then I can’t control myself and I kiss her, and then I run after her into the street. Where is the cool, collected, driven doctor that I know myself to be?
I groan and rub my hands on my face. My room is still stuffy with the smell of sex, and my body is sweaty.
I feel vaguely embarrassed about the morning. It’s not like me to not be in control. What does Val think of me? She must think I’m all over the place.
But she came back for me. Twice.
Okay, fair enough, the first time was because she was furious with me but the second time, she wanted me. She wanted me just as much as I wanted her.
I smile as I think about her running back down the street toward me. The way my body felt weightless when she collided with me. And then… I’ve never been with a woman like that. I’ve never felt such a connection with someone. My body is still twitching, even an hour or more after my orgasm. I know I need a shower but I just lie back in bed and enjoy this feeling.
And she came. I gave her her first ever orgasm. I did it, and she felt it. The look in her eye was unreal. My heart swells with pride and I just want to do it again, and again, and again. When I think about her back arching and the surprise in her eyes it makes my cock twitch. It was almost enough to make me explode, just feeling her pleasure and knowing I’d given it to her. I wish she was here. I’d turn around and give it to her all morning and all afternoon.
This is new territory for me. It’s always been just sex with me, ever since my ex ripped my heart out of my chest and stomped on it in front of me. Even then… I shake my head. Now is not the time to be dredging up the past. The twinge in my heart when I think of Val reminds me a little bit too much of things I’d rather not think of.
But now… this feels good. I actually want her to come back tonight, and I was serious when I said it sounded good to stay in and watch a movie together. If it feels this good it can’t be wrong, can it?
I check the clock. It’s barely past one, she won’t be back for hours. My chest squeezes and I take a deep breath.
I need to distract myself. I get up and try to tidy up a bit. There are clothes everywhere, both from last night and from this morning. As I go around my apartment cleaning, I think about the botched sale this morning. I can’t help but feel relieved that my apartment is still mine.
It must be cold feet. I’ve lived in New York for ages, and the thought of leaving is scary, even for someone like me. I look around my apartment and sigh.
I need to stay focused. This has been my plan ever since I started medical school. No women, no distractions. I’ve had these rules for a reason. Sex when I want it, but the ultimate priority is my career.
When I’m done cleaning up, I flop down on my couch and take a deep breath. One more night with Val won’t hurt. I can just keep it casual with her. I want to see her again. I want to make her climax again. Isn’t that the definition of keeping it casual? It’s just sex.
I lean my head against the couch and close my eyes. Is it still ‘just sex’ when you care about someone else’s pleasure as much as your own?
I don’t just want to make her climax. I want to make her smile, hear that beautiful, musical laugh of hers and see her face light up. I want to hear her story, listen to her voice as she talks to me. I want to know where she’s from and what she thinks. I sigh, thinking about how good it felt to be near her.
I need to stay busy or else my mind is going to run circles around me. I call Dave. His voice booms over the phone when he answers.
“Yo! What happened to you last night? You disappeared.”
“Yeah, just had to go home, had enough of being in that club. Should have left sooner though.”
“Yeah, you were pretty wasted,” he agrees. "You hungover today?”
“Am I hungover?” I scoff. “Dude, not only am I hungover, I fucking slept through my apartment viewing and fell out of bed completely naked when they walked in.”
“What?” he starts. I hear him laugh through the headset and the corners of my mouth twitch upwards. “What did they do? Why were you naked?”
“I don’t know, I just came home drunk and must have stripped down.”
“No,” he breathes. Dave is laughing his usual full-bellied laugh. I smile. “That’s a guaranteed sale then, right?” he asks, still laughing. “How could they not buy it after seeing Doctor O himself.”
“It was pretty bad,” I reply, smiling. My face freezes and I sigh. For some reason I don’t want to tell him about Val. Usually we tell each other all the gritty details about the women we pick up but somehow it seems wrong to tell him about this one. It was different with her.
“What about you?” I say to change the subject. “How’d your night end up?”
“Oh man, you remember that smoking hot brunette I was talking to?” He rattles on and I try to stay focused but it just doesn’t seem that interesting. The thought of picking up chicks and then never calling them over and over just seems so pointless all of a sudden. How could this change so quickly? If I even talked to another girl now, I’d just be comparing her to Val.
“Are you still there?”
My thoughts jolt back to Dave.
“Yeah man, sorry, still got a brutal headache.”
“Me too, buddy,” he replies. “Anyway, I’ll catch you later. You want to hang out tonight?”
I can’t believe I’m thinking this, but I would actually prefer to stay in watching a movie with Val than go out with Dave and find another woman to sleep with. This is different, but in a good way.
“Nah, I’m good Dave, going to stay off the booze today and try to recover. Big week at work next week.”
“All right, your loss,” he says with a chuckle. “Don’t flash anyone else, you could get in trouble.”
“Fuck you, man” I laugh. Dave hangs up the phone and I sigh. I feel nervous about this change, but then I think about Val and the way her face looked when I was on top of her. I need to see that face again, need to feel her body against mine. I hope her lunch doesn’t take too long.
25
Valerie
“Val, you look different. Something’s changed. What happened?”
I haven’t even seen Emma for five seconds and she already knows something’s up. I’d never be able to hide anything from her, not that I’d ever want to. She spreads her arms and gives me a big bear hug. Her hair smells like fresh flowers and I can’t help but feel comfortable with her. We pull away and she looks at me, searching my face.
“That,” she declares, “is the glow of someone who has had an orgasm.” She’s almost triumphant when she looks at me with raised eyebrows, waiting for me to confirm.
“Emma, shh,” I laugh, looking around. How can she just blurt these things out without thinking of who’s around us?
“So you’re not denying it,” she says with a smile playing in her eyes. She wiggles her eyebrows a bit and I shake my head, laughing.
“I can’t hide anything from you,” I say. She lifts her arms up in celebration and hops from one foot to the other.
“Yes! I’m so happy.
” She grabs me and gives me another hug. “Tell me everything. Was it your vibrator? When, how, what,” she pauses. “Who?”
I’m blushing now and I can’t help it. She inhales dramatically and brings a hand up to her chest.
“Valerie Brooks. Who was it?” She’s laughing now and guides me over to a table. We sit down and I wait for the waitress to give us a menu and take our drink orders before I say anything to Emma. She’s staring at me.
“Val, if you don’t start talking, I’m going to jump over this table and strangle you. What happened?”
“It was the doctor,” I finally blurt out.
Emma’s jaw drops. “No.”
“Yep,” I say, laughing.
“The doctor?”
“The doctor.”
“And he made you… he got you there?” Now she’s the one who’s tongue tied. My cheeks are burning but I’m laughing.
“You’ll never believe what happened.”
I tell her every detail from the morning, starting with picking up the keys from the other real estate agent. She’s hanging on my every word and laughing and pressing me for more details. I only pause my story when the waitress comes back to take our orders. When she walks away, I continue.
“He just grabbed me and kissed me and I didn’t know what to do so I ran away.”
“You ran away? What do you mean, you ran away?” she says, sipping her coffee and frowning.
“I mean, like, I turned around and ran out the door.” I shrug. “I panicked.”
Emma is cackling and people at the next table are turning their heads.
“I don’t even know why, it was like my brain just exited out of the situation and I had to leave,” I laugh. “I made it to my car and then I turned back. He had run out of his apartment after me and we kissed again out on the street.”
“This is like, some Romcom shit. You ran away and then ran back and he had come out to run after you? If it was raining it could have been in The Notebook.”
I laugh. “Well, he hasn’t written me every day for a year or anything. He just stumbled out of his bed bare-ass naked.”
It’s nice to talk to her, to digest what’s just happened together. I feel like I can relax and think about the crazy morning I’ve had.
“So tell me about the sex. I want to hear everything. How big was his cock?” She holds up her hands, index fingers an inch apart. “Tell me when,” she says with a raised eyebrow before slowly starting to spread her fingers apart from each other.
I laugh, but still, I hesitate. Somehow it doesn’t feel right to tell her every detail about that. It was so intimate and private. I want to keep it that way but I’m not sure why. I ignore her hands and keep talking.
“Yeah, I don’t know, it’s kind of a blur. We just… it just happened.”
The waitress reappears with our food and it saves me from skirting her questions anymore. I change the subject.
“So what about you, Em? You sounded a bit down about that guy not calling you back.”
“Oh, I’m not down,” she says. “I’m fine. It’s fine.” She waves it away but her shoulders are tense and her jaw clenches. “I just thought we had a bit of a connection, I guess. Like, we talked a lot more than just a hookup, you know? We laughed a lot and I slept over and I thought that he wanted to see me again.”
“Maybe he’s just a jerk. It sounds like he was using you.”
“Probably.” Her eyes are still sad when she looks at me. “Rejection just sucks. Especially when I felt like we actually got along. As many single people as there are in New York, having an actual connection doesn’t actually happen that often.”
“Believe me, I know,” I say, taking a bite of my food. Loneliness has been my constant companion in this city.
She shakes her head and changes the subject. “Enough about me. It was just a random hookup and I made the mistake of getting attached. It was one night. It’ll blow over though, I don’t even remember his name.”
I think she’s lying about that last part but I don’t push it. It’s rare for her to be vulnerable like this, and I know her well enough to just let it go for now. She’ll open up when she’s ready, and it’s nice to be here together and share this moment with her.
“And you know what they say,” she continues. “The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else. I see that you’ve finally taken that advice to heart.”
I can feel myself blushing but I can’t help but laugh along with her. She has a way of making me feel good about anything. We finish our food and I’m happy that I’ve come to see her, even if I had to leave Clay to come here.
She gives me a big hug when we leave and squeezes me tight. I think she’s tearing up when she backs up and looks at me.
“I’m really, really happy about you and Doctor O. You deserve to be happy and have lots and lots of orgasms.”
I laugh. “Doctor O?”
“Well, isn’t that what he is?” She says with a grin. “Seems to be very effective.”
I laugh again and say goodbye. Maybe she’s right, I do deserve to be happy. I can’t help but smile at the thought of going back to Clay’s house tonight.
26
Clay
I keep checking the clock. How long can one lunch take? She said she’d be back for dinner but the afternoon seems to be dragging on. I’ve cleaned my house from top to bottom and organized everything. I made sure my TV worked and thought of some movies we could watch. I even scrubbed my microwave for some reason, as if she’s going to open it up and check that it’s clean. Now I’m looking at the oven and realizing I haven’t cleaned it in about two years.
I blow the air out of my nostrils and walk away from my kitchen. I don’t need to clean my oven right now.
I know I’m just trying to keep myself busy, to stop myself watching the clock. It’s not working. I haven’t been this excited to see a girl since I was in high school. It’s taking all my self-control to not text her every twenty minutes.
It’s like I don’t even know myself anymore. Maybe it’s the thrill of giving her her first orgasm. The novelty will wear off and I’ll be back to myself in a couple days.
I hope so.
Still, it’s kind of exciting to feel like this, to care about what she thinks and what she says. Plus, I can’t wait to have my arms wrapped around that tight body of hers again, feeling her tits pressed up against me and her nipples hardening. Just the thought of her nakedness makes me want her, badly.
My phone dings and I practically pounce on it. It’s her. Judging by the way my heart jumped, the novelty certainly hasn’t worn off yet.
Hey, just at home changing and showering. You still down for Thai food tonight?
My fingers can’t type fast enough.
Sounds good but I don’t care about the food. I just want to eat you. Get back here I’m dying to taste your pussy again.
I pause before hitting send. Maybe that’s coming on a bit too strong. I don’t know if she’s into dirty talk, she’s only just had her first orgasm. I erase the message and restart.
Sounds good. What time do you think you’ll be over?
7ish :)
Seven-ish. That’s two more hours away. I sigh. Maybe the oven does need cleaning after all.
Get a grip. I’m a grown man, I can wait two hours. I pop on one of the movies I’d chosen earlier and grab a beer out of the fridge to help the time go by.
Finally, an eternity and a half later my buzzer rings. I jump-hop out of my seat and over to the intercom.
“It’s me.” Her voice rings over the speaker. I buzz her up. My palms are sweaty. I can’t wait to see her and feel her in my arms again. I want more time with her to explore her body, get to know every curve. I want to taste her again and make her come again and again and again.
There’s a light knock at the door and she’s here.
“Hey,” she says simply, holding up a big bag of Styrofoam containers. “I brought food. I’m not sure what you like but I go
t my favorites so that’s what you’re stuck with.” She grins and my blood floods to my crotch.
She’s dressed like she was in my office last week, in a simple tank top and jeans. I’ve never seen her look so good. Her hair is cascading all around her and she’s smiling at me in that honest, innocent smile that lights up her face.
I say nothing, just lean down and crush my lips against hers. They taste better than I remember. I grab the bag of food out of her hands and place it on the counter, turning around to lift her up over my shoulder. Her feet are dangling in front of me and I put my arm across her thighs.
“I’ve been dying here on my own,” I tell her as I carry her to my bedroom.
“Poor you,” she says sarcastically, squirming and laughing.
I throw her down on the bed and jump on top of her. I’ve been thinking of this all day, of having her body underneath mine. I devour her lips and move down to her neck. I trace the line of her collarbone with my lips and bring my hands over her stomach, her breasts, her arms. I breathe in and feel the hammering in my chest as her perfume fills my nostrils.
My head spins and my body takes over. She’s under me, around me, over me. Her hair falls across her face and her mouth opens, and I’ve never seen anything so beautiful. I can’t help myself. I just want to be closer, closer, closer. I can’t get enough of her.
The sound of her moans is music, the touch of her skin is magic. I don’t think about what it means that my heart is soaring every time I look at her or touch her. The only things that matter are her, and her pleasure, and her body here next to mine.
She sits up so that she’s straddling me and pulls her tank top off over her head. She unclasps her bra and throws it to the side and my hands fly up to grab her tits. They’re perfect and soft and she leans into my touch, closing her eyes as I feel her body.
Val opens her eyes back up and moves down my legs, unbuttoning my jeans and pulling them down to my ankles. I help her pull my boxers down and my hard cock springs free. She grabs it in her soft hand and starts stroking it gently up and down. I groan. It feels so, so good.
Doctor's Orders (Complete Series) Page 9