by Everly Frost
“You will!” I shout.
“You can’t believe that I would ever hurt you!” he roars.
He grips my hip when I pry his hand from my waist, grabs my shoulder when I wrench his hand from my back. Each time I try to free myself, he reaches for me somewhere else, forcing me to stay right where I am.
“You have to!” I scream.
“You can’t say that!” His shout rages over me, as if he can make me believe what he believes. “You are not heart—”
He suddenly freezes, sucking air into his chest as his eyes widen. The blood drains from his face in a sickening wave.
“Heartless?” I ask.
The abyss inside me grows wider. An empty hollow filled with sudden truth. It drains my anger, leaving a rising tide of emptiness inside me.
I try to breathe as the memory of Cyrian’s voice whispers inside my mind.
Where is your heart?
“My heart,” I whisper, releasing Nathaniel’s shoulders to grip my chest, my movement threatening to unbalance us both and topple us to the floor. “The stone wasn’t just my power. It was a piece of my heart.”
Nathaniel’s face blurs in front of me, my vision spinning.
“But… how much of my heart is missing?” I ask.
Where is your heart?
Cyrian asked me how I can exist. Mathilda said my heart is hidden from her. She tried to see my intentions and then she backed away from me, pale and shocked.
I run cold, my ears buzz, and my power pours in streams beneath my skin. I sense starlight glowing from the top of my head to my toes, a protective shield slowly forming over my body.
My body, my… everything… is transforming with every new pulse of power.
Drawing air into my mouth, I sense the air slip down my throat. My chest rises in response, but I’m not sure if I’m actually breathing.
How would I know what breathing feels like when I can’t tell what a heart feels like?
A thousand times I thought my heart was beating.
I felt it thud and even stop inside my chest.
I felt every emotion there is to feel—pain, love, loss, betrayal, hope.
I bled, I had a pulse, and I hurt like everyone else.
But all of the voices, all of the warnings, rage around inside my head now.
Darkest of stars.
You don’t belong to them.
You were never a girl.
Aura… where is your heart?
The realization is cold but certain. “My heart was taken from me.”
The glow of my magic grows between my body and Nathaniel’s—a tangible force that pushes him away from me and compels him to release me.
He doesn’t try to fight me this time, uncurling his arms from around me, the press and slide of his skin making me shiver as I slip to the floor and back away from him.
The ache in his eyes would tear my heart apart… if I had more than a sliver of it glowing inside my chest.
All of my life, I thought I knew who I was, where I stood in my world, the path I was supposed to walk. Queen’s champion. Nathaniel’s shield. Wife. Warrior. Even last night, I was certain that, even though my path had changed, I knew what I needed to do. I was certain that I had to die for peace to finally come to Bright and Fell.
Now… my foundations are gone.
“What sort of creature can live without a heart?” I ask. “What am I?”
The moonlight shines across Nathaniel’s body through the wide window, highlighting his sculped muscles, lighting up the flickers of starlight that he shouldn’t have—that he took from me.
His expression is blank now. Broken.
“You are old magic,” he says, his voice barely a rasp. “You’re a Celestial Star.”
I freeze, shocked, as he raises his arm and points through the window at the starlight flickering outside.
“You’re one of them,” he says.
Chapter 15
My shock gives way to my need to know—to understand what I am.
I follow the line of Nathaniel’s arm to the window. Outside, the night sky is calm and clear in all directions. I search the sky for what he pointed at, finding only the moon and a thousand stars, pinpricks of light.
I’m about to turn away when a shape flits across the air outside the window. A formless wash of bright white light appears for a second before it fades again. It reminds me of a feather, twisting and turning lightly, every angle making it appear a different shape.
I grip the window ledge as I peer into the night sky, waiting for the dancing light to appear again.
I count the flickers of light inside my chest as I wait. One… Two… Three…
Another light washes across the sky, farther to my left but closer to me than the one before. It leaves a glowing trail, a vanishing blaze, as it leaps from one spot to another, playing with the air around the tower. Every time it vanishes, it reforms again, traveling a path like a stone skipping across the surface of a lake.
A third light joins it, this one glowing brightly in a single spot that draws closer to me. Ripples of light radiate from its center as it grows larger before it wanes and reappears to the right, glowing brighter and closer still.
Without taking my eyes off it, I climb up onto the window ledge, still completely naked, but I’m not cold. I extend my arm through the wash of magic protecting the room, my fingers reaching through the chill air.
The glowing form fades and brightens, drawing closer.
A ribbon of starlight glides through the air toward me.
I hold my breath, allowing my power to glow around my fingertips, waiting for the ribbon to reach me, needing the contact, desperate to know what lies at the heart of the light…
The circle of light suddenly jolts, jumping backward, a startled movement. The ribbon it was sending toward me disintegrates. The other two light forms freeze before they dart in different directions, streaking through the air and vanishing.
“What—?”
A wash of blue lightning crackles across the space in front of the window a second before Treble drops into view. His bright eyes are wild with fear. His wings crack, sharp lightning sizzling across my outstretched arm. I can’t hear the sound from inside the room, but I know he’s trying to warn me.
I leap back to the floor. “Nathaniel! We have to go!”
Nathaniel has already pulled on his clothing, hurriedly strapping the weapon harness around his chest. I grab my clothing, dressing as fast as I can before I snatch my weapon harness off the floor.
I spin, uncertain, but Nathaniel runs toward the window, grabbing me by the hand as he passes. We leap for the ledge at the same time.
“You jump first!” I shout.
It takes Nathaniel a split second to judge the gap between the window and Treble. He leaps through the magical barrier and out into space, reaching for Treble’s wing.
The light inside my chest flickers with anxiety for a moment, then Nathaniel’s hand closes over Treble’s wing bone. He swings himself up and over Treble’s back, crouching low.
I don’t wait another moment, leaping out across the distance and somersaulting onto Treble’s back, sliding down in front of Nathaniel. Treble rises up at the same time, beating his wings furiously.
As he soars to the left, I crane my neck, sensing the malevolent life forms in the sky around us.
Ten thunderbirds span out across the sky, blocking our escape in every direction—above, below, and all around us. The uniforms of their riders tell me they are Imatra’s Day Guards. My lip curls as I identify Nadina, the head of the Day Guard flying on our right-hand side. She threatened my adoptive father and then tried to kill Nathaniel when we tried to escape Bright.
Imatra rides ahead of them, directly above us. Her crimson thunderbird’s blood-red lightning crackles around her slender silhouette as she urges it to follow us. Her armor is also crimson, reminding me of the fae I saw in the book, but her hair is loose, the flying strands whipping around her face.
The first time the other thunderbirds closed Treble out, he was distressed. Now, he turns his neck and casts me a rebellious look, his eyes slightly narrowed. His expression tells me he will fly us out of here the moment he has the chance.
Instinctively, I lean into Nathaniel. I can’t protect his back, but I intend to remain between him and Imatra for as long as possible. My chest hurts when he doesn’t close his arms around me like he always did before.
Imatra is a picture of perfection as her thunderbird draws level with us. Her full lips are relaxed, her glittering blue eyes alive and alert, her hair swaying across her delicate shoulders and framing her narrow waist. But her skin is a paler shade of porcelain and her ruby-red fingernails press into the armor around her thighs. I sense her unease with every breath she takes, her inhalations slightly too rapid.
“Hello, dear,” she says, her voice betraying no emotion. “You look well.”
Quietly, I test my new power, taking a deep breath before I exhale, gently pushing against her power over the air around us. My starlight glows brightly, casting light in all directions.
I smile when I sense Imatra’s control falter.
She grips her thighs harder.
“You will give me answers,” I say, rising slowly to my feet on Treble’s back. I’m still holding my weapon harness. Drawing the sword from its holder, I crouch to drape the harness across Treble’s back, before I brace, take a deep breath…
I leap across the distance between Imatra and me, landing lightly on her thunderbird’s strong neck, rapidly stepping across it to drive the sword at her throat. The tip pierces her skin before her reflexes kick in and she reacts, leaping to her feet and taking a step away from me.
Nadina and the other guards swarm inward, their thunderbirds shrieking with fury, but Imatra holds up both of her hands to stop them. With a frustrated shout, Nadina screams at the others to stop. They don’t withdraw, but they don’t come any closer, either.
Blood can’t be shed within the Spire, but out here, that rule doesn’t seem to apply.
My sword’s tip reaches within an inch of Imatra’s neck.
She lowers her gaze to it, her head held high, stiff as she balances on her coasting bird.
“You don’t need a blade to kill me,” she says.
“I know,” I answer, my starlight power building inside my chest, glimmering across the space between us.
Imatra’s gaze shifts, flickering left, and a moment later, a glitter bulb rises up behind her. It’s encased in dark light, a thin thread of power twisting in the air between the bulb and Imatra. The bulb itself is a sparkling mess on the verge of shattering, as if it were about to explode, but Imatra encased it just in time. Within the dark light, the bulb trembles and shakes, its pieces trying to come apart, an explosion needing to happen.
“I received your gift,” Imatra says. “A memory of this Spire from my childhood.”
The bulb is so shattered, there’s no way I can see the memory inside it. But if it’s a memory of the Spire like she said, then it’s probably the same one Mathilda had.
“What did Mathilda teach you?” I ask.
Imatra smiles, a spark of light returning to her eyes. “Oh, so you met my friend. It was very wicked of us. A witch and a fae meeting in secret and sharing their knowledge of magic. It was forbidden.”
I edge closer, gritting my teeth. “What did she teach you?”
Imatra’s smile fades. She inclines her head slightly downward, the wind from her bird’s wings lifting her hair. “Mathilda and I sat on that cliff, eating apples, talking about magic, and gazing up at the Celestial Stars—the Lucidia—playing in the sky above us far beyond our reach. The Lucidia were everywhere in the ether above Bright in those days, but you could see them most clearly out here.”
Imatra leans closer, daring my sword to pierce her skin as her bright eyes meet mine and her voice lowers to a whisper. “Then one night, Mathilda pointed to the most beautiful Lucidia we had ever seen and she wondered aloud… imagine the power we could control if we could snatch a Celestial Star from the ether and pull it down to earth.”
I inhale cold air, pulling it into the abyss inside my chest.
“Of course, I told her it was impossible,” Imatra whispers, her voice a soft lulling sound. “It would take more than fae magic or light magic combined. In fact, it would take all of the dark magic ripped from a thousand souls to tear a Lucidia from the sky and force her to the ground.”
“A thousand souls,” I whisper, pressing my eyes closed for a moment. Deep relief fills me because I wasn’t the one who killed the humans during the final battle. “A thousand human souls. You killed them on the battlefield to give you power to pull me from the sky.”
Imatra leans back a little, pride making her eyes shine. “It was easy to lure Tobias Exalted to the border. I told him to meet me on the battlefield, to bring his full force, and we would settle the war between us once and for all. He was so desperate for an end to the conflict. That part was simple.”
Her smile fades, replaced by cold anger. “Ripping you from the sky was harder. But seizing your power proved impossible.”
My voice is as cold as hers. “You cut out my heart.”
“I spent years researching the old magic, the history of your species, the nature of your power. Once grounded, you would take the shape of a girl, a transformation triggered by contact with solid earth. I would have moments to cut out your heart before you woke up and defended yourself. Provided I removed your entire heart, you would die, and your power would be mine.”
My memory sweeps over me. Imatra had plunged her knife toward my chest at the same time Nathaniel’s father swung his halberd at her neck.
She’d missed. She’d cut off the tiniest sliver of my heart instead.
“Nathaniel’s father interrupted you,” I say.
She laughs, a harsh, condescending sound. “He wasn’t supposed to survive my dark magic—he should have died with the others when I pulled you from the sky—but I underestimated the power of light magic he held. That damn weapon protected him! I didn’t realize he was alive until it was too late. He tried to save you, and my blade slipped.”
She snarls as she leans closer. “By the time I tried again, you were waking up. I missed the stem at the top of your heart. So you lived—but with a fraction of your power. You were a shell compared to who you were before. When you woke up fully, I told you a story that gave me control over you, and you never questioned it.” Her mouth twists. “But your broken heart was useless to me. All my work, a lifetime of planning… destroyed! And now… look at you. Glowing.”
“Nathaniel gave me back part of my heart,” I say.
She considers me with cold eyes. “I thought that first slice had burned to ash. If I’d known Tobias stole it when he tried to save you, I would have destroyed all of Fell looking for it.”
I lower my weapon, allowing it to swing to my side without harming her thunderbird. “Now I’m bound to fight for you.”
She doesn’t smile. “The old law binds everyone, no matter who they are. You may not be fae, but you are my champion under the Law. How sad for you to kill Nathaniel.”
I don’t know how much of our conversation Nathaniel can hear. Treble has remained in the same position coasting in the air behind us, a little to my right. Imatra’s voice is soft and so is mine, but the air is still and quiet, allowing the sound of our voices to travel.
“I will not kill for you,” I say.
She dares to reach toward me as if she’ll stroke my cheek, but she pauses before she makes contact. “Oh, my dear child. You think you love him, but consider this: His father stole a piece of your heart. You were connected to Nathaniel from the moment he held your heart in his hands. Do you really love him? Or is your love stolen, just like your heart?”
My hand clenches around my
weapon. From the moment Nathaniel stepped out of the mist, I was drawn to him. His strength, his honor, his heart. We formed a connection faster than I thought possible. I reasoned that it was a result of the Law of Champions—the Vanem Dragon’s promise that we would walk side by side, that we would eat, sleep, and breathe together and, by the end of the third day, we would know the other better than we knew ourselves.
Every part of the Dragon’s warning has come true. We have experienced each other’s lives in Bright and Fell, fought by each other’s sides, battled for each other, suffered the same wounds, the same heartache, breathed air into each other, brought each other back from the brink of death.
And as for knowing the other better than ourselves… Nathaniel discovered my true power before I did. He recognized what I was before I did, while I understand light magic—the power of his weapon—even though I suspect he doesn’t.
But none of that compelled us to love each other.
From the moment Nathaniel carried my heart beside his… did either of us have a choice about whom we would love?
“You won’t refuse to fight for me,” Imatra says, a declaration.
My gaze flickers to the side—to Nathaniel, who waits quietly on Treble.
Nathaniel is a massive, strong, forbidding man. Broken a little now, but his expression is blank, the face of a king. He could tear me apart if he wants to. He already has.
I breathe slowly, and when I turn back to Imatra, I wear the mask of her champion, my emotions finally hidden, my purpose all that matters.
“I will fight for you,” I say. “On one condition.”
“Name it.”
“You will return Nathaniel’s weapon to him.”
Her eyes narrow. “It won’t protect him from your power,” she says, but she doesn’t look completely certain about that. “Old magic is the highest form of magic. Your starlight can defeat light magic. Dark magic, too.”
I nod slowly. When I healed Maggie’s Ebon Rot, I thought I was curing her body—I even called it ‘healing’ in my mind—but she didn’t recover until I destroyed the seed of dark magic in her heart. I didn’t heal her. I ended the dark magic that had taken hold of her. It was the same with the girls I helped. I flooded them with my magic to make them well again.