by Nina Walker
I can’t follow through with this. I just can’t.
My mind whirls with regretful thoughts as I fail to find Mom in the busy casino. I look everywhere before finding the nurse who tells me she already left. I hope she’s safe and okay. She probably ran out of money and went home. At least she’s not in a hospital or dead somewhere. Defeated, I wait on the front steps of the casino for a cab to arrive. I know it’s counterproductive, but I really hope Mom won some money tonight so she can pay me back for all this cab fare. September’s rent is paid and I’m saving the last of the hidden sock money toward our next payment and my own money for a car.
I stare at my phone for too long and then sit on the steps. Exhaustion is heavy, and all I want is to be in my bed and for this night to undo itself.
But what if . . .
What if I do it, though? What if I find something valuable to tell Adrian about Tate and he saves my mother from addiction? I’d never have to come back to this casino again.
But I can’t.
I won’t.
So then, what? I’m going to die? I don’t want to die.
Adrian is the one who said there wasn’t a time limit on our blood vow, so maybe I can hide from him, and hold off telling him anything valuable. I mean, eventually I’ll be old enough that Leslie will do whatever he does to erase my memory and that will be the end of it. The blood vow can’t possibly work if I don’t remember it, right?
Ugh, I don’t know.
And now that I’m really thinking about it, something isn’t adding up. How, exactly, is Tate going to magically erase my memory? And why is it that he’s the only adult I’ve ever met who’s immune to vampire compulsion? Felix said there was more to the supernatural community the first day I met Tate. Tate said I’d learn more soon. But he hasn’t mentioned it again in the last month of training. There’s got to be something else going on with that man. He claims his immunity isn’t something he can share, but maybe he’s lying, or maybe he just hasn’t tested it enough.
I can’t help but wonder if he’s some kind of warlock. Are those a thing? There’s enough voodoo witch-doctors in New Orleans for me to believe it’s possible. But I don’t know, Tate seems too level-headed for that. Or maybe he really is a werewolf, but with powers? Maybe he’s something else. Elf? Are elves a thing? I know enough bookworm girls out there who would hope so, who’d give up their firstborn for a chance to be kidnapped by a High Fae and taken to some magical realm.
I snort and the sound rings out into the darkness. I’m starting to get away with my imagination, here. None of that is real. In my experience, the sparkly stuff doesn’t exist. It’s the things that go bump in the night that you have to worry about.
Well, when I get home––another fifty bucks poorer thanks to Mom––I don’t want my mind to be a complete mess about this. I may not know the right thing to do, or if I even have a choice in the matter, but I’m going to climb into my warm bed with the decision that I’ll deal with this problem when it comes back to bite me in the butt. Until then, I’m going to pretend this night never even happened.
Fat chance.
I tap my shoe against the concrete step and double check my phone that the car I ordered will be here soon, when a smooth voice behind me says a low, “Hello.”
I jump up and turn to the man descending the casino’s steps toward me. My hand presses against my chest. “You scared me.”
“I have that effect on people.”
My throat tightens when he approaches close enough for me to recognize him. “Hugo.”
“Hello, Evangeline. I’d hoped I’d run into you again.”
He sniffs the air and grins. “Are you hurt?”
Without thinking, I raise my hand to my injured lip. That only causes him to chuckle again. Everything within me is telling me to get far away from this one. He’s not here to be my friend.
“There’s something very familiar about you,” he goes on. “Do you feel it, too?”
“We’ve met before,” I try to keep my voice from shaking, but it’s useless. “On the ferry, remember?”
“Oh, I remember.” His eyes narrow into little slits. “But there’s something more to this . . . connection.”
“If this is some kind of pickup line, sorry but I don’t date vampires.” My tone is dry. This is my attempt to change the subject. Sarcasm usually is. The last thing I need is for this guy to realize the reason we might have a connection is because I killed his baby vampire lady a few weeks back. I’m sure now that it was her. Tate had said that vamps rarely make kin, so it stands to reason that the one I staked was Hugo’s.
He doesn’t take the bait. “This isn’t about romance and you know it.”
I swallow hard just as my phone dings and a car pulls up. “That’s my ride. Gotta run!”
I dash down the remaining steps and into the car. Hugo doesn’t follow me, though I can’t let go of the horrible suspicion that I haven’t seen the last of him.
When I get home, Mom isn’t in bed. I check the garage and the car isn’t in the bay. It’s well past 2 a.m. which means she’s either still at the casino and the nurse lied, or she went home with somebody else. I don’t want to think about that one because she’s never left me alone at night before. But there’s a lot that’s changed with the woman. Maybe I shouldn’t be surprised.
I send her a quick check-in text and fall asleep waiting for her to reply. She never does.
I sleep through my alarm the next morning and not by a little, by a lot. When I eventually peel myself out of the bed and realize I’d turned it off this morning in my sleepy stupor, the time on the screen catches me by surprise. I’m three hours late for training. I’ve never been late before. I’m also used to catching rides with Felix, but he never bothered this morning, it seems. There’s no missed call or anything.
Cursing my mom and Adrian, and Felix for that matter, I speed through the quickest shower of my life. I need to get the cigarette smell from the casino out of my hair. I don’t want anyone guessing where I was last night. I finish up and hastily french braid my long wet hair back, slide into workout clothes, and run to the kitchen to grab a banana and fill up my water bottle.
Mom’s car keys sit on the counter. I guess she made it home after all. She should be at work by now.
“Mom.” I pop my head in her darkened room. “Are you okay?”
She mumbles something about calling in sick to work and rolls over, her little red head burrowing under a mountain of pillows. I don’t have time to lecture her about the stunt she pulled last night, and it wouldn’t matter anyway. Taking her car, I zip downtown to training and hope that I don’t get into too much trouble for showing up late.
Well, I try to zip over, but I get caught in terrible slow-moving traffic and by the time I’m actually pulling into the underground parking garage, I’m four hours late. Half the day is gone. I wish I’d applied some makeup because I can already tell I’m blushing from embarrassment and probably look like I lost as much sleep as I did. They’re going to think I’m hungover, and with my lip still healing, they may even think I ended up in a bar fight or something.
I do the fingerprint scan first and then number code my way into the facility, racing over to the gym area where I expect to find my teammates sparring. But it’s empty. Taking the stairs up to the classroom areas, I find a group of hunters gathered outside of Leslie’s office.
“What’s going on?” I ask.
One of the girls turns on me with a frown. “He’s gone.”
“What do you mean, gone?”
She shrugs. “He wasn’t here this morning so we started working out on our own. Finally someone got worried enough to break into his office. He wasn’t there. He’s not anywhere in the building. This has never happened before. Did you know he lives here? He has an apartment and everything. He’s very careful about when he leaves and where he goes..”
I did not know that. “Thanks,” I mutter to the girl and push my way through the crowd until I fi
nd Felix, Seth, and Kenton whispering in the corner.
“What’s going on? Tate’s missing?”
They go quiet and turn to me. “There she is,” Seth says. “Hello, Eva. Nice of you to join us.” He peers down at his watch. “A little late, don’t you think?”
I wave in his face. “Uh, yeah, hi! I’m your teammate, remember? You’re supposed to be on my side, not giving me crap for being late.”
He rolls his eyes. “Giving you crap for being late proves I’m on your side. You can do better. Who else is going to tell it to you like it is?”
Fair point.
I turn to Felix, punching him in the arm. “Why didn’t you wake me up this morning? You were my ride.”
“I rang the doorbell twice.”
Well, shoot. “You could’ve called.”
“I’m not your personal alarm clock,” he bites out. “And I drove across town for you not to answer your door.”
Fair point.
I ball my hands into fists. “Why are you acting so rude to me? It’s been this way for two freaking weeks.”
“Really, Eva?” Felix shakes his head. “Think about it. What happened two weeks ago?”
“I don’t know.” That’s a lie. Two weeks ago we danced and got close and I thought for sure we’d end up a thing, but then he backed off. It still stings to think about it. Rejection sucks.
He laughs bitterly. “Come on, Eva. Say it.”
I’m not going to say it. What? That he rejected me? That’s cruel. I’ve never known Felix to be cruel but maybe he is.
“Break it up, Mom and Dad.” Kenton steps between us. “We have bigger fish to fry than your stupid argument.”
I fold my arms and turn on Kenton. “So then what’s the problem with Tate?”
“The guy wasn’t here when we arrived this morning.” He points to the desk. “And look at what he left.”
Centered on Tate’s desk is a single piece of paper. Instead of a neat scrawl, the black words inked against the white appear to be written with a hurried hand.
I’m safe. I don’t know when I’ll return. Be careful. Stick together but trust no one. Things aren’t as they seem.
My face goes white hot. Surely this doesn’t have something to do with me, does it? He can’t know about my deal with Adrian. That would be impossible. But what if he did? It makes sense, actually. He somehow knows about the blood vow and took off. A shard of guilt cuts through my gut like broken glass. Maybe I caused this. Maybe it’s my fault. And what happens when the others figure out I’m the one to blame?
Chapter 18
I study the other hunters, measuring their faces for any possible suspicion that could be pointed in my direction. So far, there’s nothing beyond what I’m also feeling––they are freaking the freak out. Because, seriously, what are we supposed to do now? Tate runs this operation. He’s our leader. He tells us where to go, what to do, and teaches us how to do it. He’s like the captain and the life-jacket and the boat and suddenly we’re floating in the ocean on a flimsy raft.
“Listen up, everybody.” One of the older hunters jumps up onto the desk where everyone can see him, or at least hear him considering it’s crowded in here and there are still several people in the hallway. “I’m Cameron Scout, and I’m pretty sure I’m the oldest one here. I’m supposed to age out of the program in a few months.”
Cameron is a muscled and stocky guy with spray-tanned freckled skin and flaming red hair. He reminds me of a grown up Chucky doll who went to hang out on the Jersey Shore for the summer. He’s a little scary, a little hot, and a lot creepy, and I wouldn’t want to be on his bad side. Or his good side. Or any side, actually.
“Being the oldest here has to count for something, right? But hey, I’m not saying my seniority puts me in charge.” He smiles, and my hackles rise.
“That’s exactly what it sounds like,” Felix mutters.
“But I’m a team leader and I’ve been around the longest, so I know how things are supposed to work around here,” he continues. “So let’s just keep things going business as usual until our fearless leader returns, okay?”
A bunch of the hunters nod, and considering my team and I are newbies, it’s not like we have a dog in this fight. We’d be looked at like little yappy chihuahuas who think they’re ten times bigger than they really are. My guys and I end up nodding along with the others even though this Cameron person is a tool.
“Team leaders, raise your hands, please,” Cameron commands.
Next to me, Seth raises his hand. I’m surprised. I assumed our leader was Felix. I never thought to ask, and nobody said anything, but Felix is usually the one to drive us around and make demands and all that jazz. Felix doesn’t bat an eye at Seth’s raised hand. Once again, I’m reminded that I was late to this party and missed a few important things.
Also, if Seth is my leader, I might be in trouble. Seth doesn’t like me. He’s not a jerk, he doesn’t say anything bad about me, but that’s the point, he doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t even act like I’m here most of the time. Today was one of the only times he’s even acknowledged my existence and it was to tell me how late I was.
“Okay guys,” Cameron motions to the leaders, “hold back so we can have a conversation. The rest of you can go workout until we figure out our next step.”
We shuffle out the door and Kenton curses. “We’re so screwed. You guys know that, right? Does anyone even know how to work the simulations that’s not Tate?”
“And don’t forget we were supposed to be learning crossbows this week,” I add and the guys groan in unison. Looks like I wasn’t the only one looking forward to crossbows.
“Hopefully Tate will be back soon,” Felix grumbles.
“But if he’s not, we’re going to turn into all those other hunting organizations that end up going south and everyone gets killed,” Kenton goes on. I’ve never heard him be so negative and something about that makes this feel even worse. “Tate is what made us different and kept us safe. He’s the only damn reason I agreed to do this job in the first place.” He motions to the large state-of-the-art gym as we amble inside with the rest of the group. “I mean, the man single-handedly secured all of this without the vampires knowing. With him gone, it’s only a matter of time before it falls apart.”
There’s at least one vampire who knows about our facility.
“Well, then we’re just going to have to train harder than ever to make sure we don’t get killed, now won’t we?” I raise my eyebrows at Kenton. I hate seeing him like this but I don’t blame him. We’re all here for a cause, not a death wish.
“The woman has a point.” Felix sighs, raking a hand through his curly dark hair. His bicep flexes and I have to look away. I’m mad at him. No more drooling.
“Fine, you two go first.” Kenton points to the mat. “I haven’t seen you spar yet.”
“That’s because we haven’t sparred.” Felix’s tone is warning.
“Yeah,” I add. “Felix is too holier-than-thou to spar with me.”
“It’s not like that.” He glares down at me, but behind that glare I catch hurt. I have to stop myself from rolling my eyes, because if anyone should be hurt about the iciness that’s been going on between us, it should be me.
“Then what’s it like?” I fold my arms and pop my hip.
“I don’t want to hurt you.” He says it like it’s obvious.
“Maybe you avoiding me is what’s actually hurting me. Did you ever stop to think about that?”
Felix just stares at me. He knows I’m right. Did he really not catch on before?
Kenton chuckles and intervenes. “You know that if she doesn’t get good sparring partners then you’re only weakening her for the suckers, right?”
“Yeah. What he said! Or maybe you’re scared I’m going to kick your ass?”
Felix shifts his glare to Kenton. “Fine.” He picks up two of the rubber stakes we use to practice with and tosses one to me before stepping back onto the black mat.
“But I’m not going to go easy on you.”
“You wouldn’t dare,” I tease.
And then he lunges for me.
I’m quick to dodge him, jumping out of the way and landing in a fighter’s stance. As we circle around each other, I’m reminded of two wolves challenging each other for the spot of alpha. Adrenaline spikes my blood. Everything around us blurs as I become hyper-focused on Felix. I’m quick, quicker than I’ve ever been before, dodging his moves milliseconds before they should strike. Deciding that I don’t just want to be on the defensive here, I make my own move, dropping low and kicking out my foot, hooking it around the back of his ankle and pulling. It catches him, and he falls. I pounce forward, stake prepared to strike, but he blocks me with his forearm and flips me onto my back. Before I can react, the tip of his rubber stake presses to my ribcage, just over my heart.
I lost.
His body is weighing mine down and every inch feels like an answer to all my teenaged birthday candle wishes. This is what I’ve been waiting for. I blink up into his chocolatey eyes, daring him to take this further. He shouldn’t kiss me here, not where everyone can see, but I want him to want to kiss me anyway. I want him to think about my lips and nothing else. My hope leaps when his gaze flicks to my mouth and then holds.
He feels it, too.
“What happened to your lip?” He sits back up, rolling off me.
Oh, that . . .
“Why were you looking at my lip so closely?” I deflect, and he glares. It’s not like I can tell him the truth of my healing lip, but I don’t want to lie to him either.
“Eva,” he challenges.
Well, maybe I can tell him part of the truth. “Someone got a little excited when he kissed me last night.” I wink. “Don’t worry, I liked it.”