by S. A. Ravel
Or maybe that was just being so close to Haj'erel.
"If I wanted to move to the colonies, I'd already be there," Audrey said, licking her lips and steadying herself. "Phoebe's been trying to talk me into it since she left.”
"She's right to. It's admirable that you've survived this long on your own, but your luck will run out before your days do." Haj reached out and caught Audrey's hand. With a gentle tug, he pulled their bodies together.
A small gasp escaped Audrey's lips. Her mind raced back to the night before on the rocks beside the lake. Through the blurry imagery in her head, the memory of the lakeside kiss came back to Audrey. Haj's lips, plump and gentle, teasing her lips open. Now he peered down at her with one glimmering golden eye.
"Y-you don't know that," Audrey mumbled. Her mind screamed for her to pull away, but her body begged her to move closer to him. Even in winter, being next to Haj was like basking on a sun-soaked beach. She leaned forward and pressed her face against his shoulder, giving in.
But it wasn't enough. Not for either of them.
Haj wrapped his arms around her. He buried his nose in her hair, inhaling. One finger hooked beneath Audrey's chin. His calloused thumb caressed her cheek as he turned her face up to meet his eyes again.
"How can I do it, Audrey?" he whispered, his voice heavy with a desire he couldn't hide. Maybe it shouldn't have surprised Audrey that he wanted her, after all he had wanted her when they were both wet and freezing and didn't know each other's names. But feeling Haj's growing cock against her thigh sent a thrill of excitement from her heart to her thighs.
His hand slid down the small of her back, stopping just above the curve of her rear. But in the next second, Haj's expression went from hungry to tortured. He pressed his forehead against hers as if to hide his face from view.
"How can I continue, knowing...what my absence could mean?" Haj whispered into her lips.
Suddenly, she felt a desperate need to do something with her hands. She settled for moving them up into his sandy brown hair.
"You continue by putting your lips on mine and putting us both out of our misery," she whispered breathlessly.
"Once I start, my Audrey, I will not be able to stop." His fingers trickled through her hair before coming to rest in a soft grip at the nape of her neck. He could push her away or pull her closer and she wasn't sure which she feared. “The only thing worse than leaving you behind would be to leave you with another life to care for.”
A wave of icy cold washed over Audrey. The old reflex toward defensiveness rose right after. She closed her eyes, bracing herself against the sensations. If this was their last night together, why should she fear his judgment?
"That's not...something I have to worry about," she said. "The pieces are there, but they don't work like they should.”
Maybe it was a quirk of biology. Maybe it was rotten luck. Whatever the reason, it crossed her off the short lists for every generation ship. The stability of the internal economies depended on continuous population renewal. Without a desirable skill or a womb for rent, Audrey had nothing to offer humanity in its quest among the stars. So said a bunch of suits she'd never met.
When Haj pulled back to look at her, his brow was furrowed, but his eyes were soft. He grasped her face between his hands and stroked her cheeks with his thumbs. "You speak of yourself as if you're a machine, but you're so much more, Audrey." He leaned forward against, brushing his lips against hers. "So much more.”
The doused embers of Audrey's desire bloomed back to life as Haj's lips caught hers. She trembled from the whiplash of emotion. He accepted her. He wanted her. She could feel it in his kiss.
Haj's warm hands moved beneath her coat so his fingers could caress the flesh of her back. He licked her lips, coaxing her mouth open to snake his tongue inside. One hand abandoned the valley of her back to grasp the peak of her breast. His kiss, once hesitant, took on a hungry air. He leaned forward, using his height and weight to guide her back toward the pile of blankets.
Audrey's body moved beneath his, but her mind protested. She'd just met Haj and under the fishiest circumstances–literally and figuratively–known to man.
"A machine could never make such a sweet sound," he whispered as his fingers perked Audrey's nipples into peaks, drawing a breathy moan from her.
Their entire history consisted of trying not to argue and trying not to die, by their own misadventure or someone else's malice. In the old world, the handsome giant's talented hands wouldn't outweigh the barrel of issues that followed him around. But in the new world, it had been years since Audrey felt a fraction of what she felt for Haj. If this was her last chance to connect on a physical level, she was damn well going to take it.
His fingers caught the stiff hem of her sweater. In one smooth motion he pulled it, and her arms, over her head. "Its skin would never been as soft and succulent as this."
As if to prove his point, Haj dipped his head forward, licking a trail down over her collarbone. He kissed a path along her body, stopping at the hem of her pants. His fingers undid her zipper as he spoke.
"The scent between these thighs, this maddening scent that I would cross prairies and climb mountains in search of, a machine could never produce this.”
Haj slid his hand into Audrey's pants. Greedy fingers caressed until, by her sighs, he found her clit. The chorus of moans and whimpers that fell from Audrey's lips only spurred him on. He laid his head against her hip, nuzzling the bone as he stroked her to climax.
Audrey moaned. Her hips, held in place by Haj's heavy head, pumped against him as her muscles clenched in pleasure. Slowly, she came back down to Earth to find the handsome giant hovering over her sex, sniffing hungrily at the aforementioned scent. A warm flush came to her cheeks, matched by the flush that coalesced between her thighs and under his gaze.
As Haj stared, his nostrils flared. His cock stood erect in the air, straining to be put to good use. He looked up at her. His golden eye was clouded with desire. He moved up her body, using his wide hips to coax her thighs open. His hips bucked against her weeping pussy. Each movement teased her clit, until she cried and gasped, tossing her head from side to side.
"Please, Haj," she whimpered. "Please.”
"As you wish, my aijan." He leaned down, claiming her lips again in a searing carnal kiss.
Haj’erel
Audrey's floral scent flooded Haj'erel's senses, coaxing his member ramrod straight as he hovered at her entrance. Tight, slick, and waiting to sheathe him. But his mouth watered to taste her, to savor the sweet nectar from her thighs. He would, if it were a proper claiming. But with her scent in his brain and her creamy thighs wrapped around him, Haj had just enough sense to remember. He could not claim her.
Haj'erel leaned down, catching Audrey's plump bottom lip between his teeth as he slid into her. Her walls enveloped him, sending waves of warm pleasure through him.
"Yes...Haj...." Beneath him, Audrey writhed, twisting the sheath of flesh around his pulsating cock. Goddess, he could come right there just from the way she arched her back. She was close too, his Audrey. So close.
My Audrey.
As her inner walls clenched against him, Haj gripped her hips. He pumped into her, watching the expressions of ecstasy on her face. With only one eye, there was no peripheral information to distract from her beauty. All he could see was her, the arch of her spine as she bucked her hips back against him. The flush of red that crept over her chest as her climax neared.
When the flush reached her neck, Audrey cried out. The warm sheath around Haj's cock clamped down and squeezed.
He leaned forward and froze, bracing his weight against his forearms to protect her. His eyes fell closed. An image of her lingered behind his lids. It would have to last him a long time.
My Audrey.
The first spurt of his seed shot from his tip deep into her core. A wave of hazy pleasure filled his senses as he emptied into her. Seed that would never produce a cub.
What d
id he care? The feel of Audrey’s body beneath his, her soft skin against his hard fingers, was real. It was amazing. A miracle. The first evidence of the Joyful Mother’s grace he’d felt since he’d been trapped on this cursed planet. If he could have this–have her–every night and nothing more…it would be a fine life.
When he was empty, he opened his eyes again. Audrey lay beneath him, eyes closed and mouth half open in exhaustion. His aijan…lost in a sea of pleasure he'd created.
And for the first time, Haj’erel wanted to keep her.
7
Audrey
For a while, she didn't know how long, Audrey lay beneath the blankets. She didn't move. She barely breathed. Whatever dream had led to her falling asleep in the arms of the hottest guy she'd seen in years–after the most amazing sex of her life–would disappear in a puff of reality if she did anything.
Audrey didn't want that. She wanted to stay in Haj's arms all night. If she could stay asleep, she wouldn't have to admit she was alone again until the sun rose.
Her tiny bladder had other ideas. It started with a dull ache that tugged at Audrey's awareness. Before long, it turned into a sharp stab that demanded attention. With a groan, Audrey peeled her eyes open and looked over her shoulder. She was alone.
Son of a bitch, I knew it! Had he abandoned her? He wouldn't. If he had wanted to, he never would have offered to escort her. He wouldn't have suggested she stay. She pulled at the threads on the hem of the blanket.
Had she hallucinated him? That would explain the weirdness of their meeting. An alien reindeer? Come on! She'd gotten so lonely, she'd hallucinated a deliciously wounded hunk of mystery to torment herself.
Audrey, get a grip and go look for him.
She sat up, looking around quickly to get her bearings. A thick curtain of frigid darkness hid the building from view, except for a circle of cold light from a lantern and the orange glow of the heater.
Frankie's personal unit was still on, but without the handsome giant by her side, it didn't provide enough warmth to keep Audrey's naked body from shivering. She pulled on her clothes, slid into her coat, and grabbed the lantern. For a second she considered looking for Haj, but her overly full bladder won the argument.
All right, should I start at the front or the back?
In answer, the back door opened with a blast of icy air and Haj ducked inside, shutting it quickly behind him. His eye moved over her face then jerked to the lantern. In two steps, he crossed the small hallway and took the glowing cylinder from her hands, his expression stern, and pressed the power button.
"You must leave, Audrey. Now!" He took her arm, dragging her back down the hall toward their camp.
Audrey didn't fight him, but she wasn't going to just go along with him either. "What are you talking about, Haj? It's the middle of the night and I'm still sleepy.”
Haj didn't respond. He pulled her down the dark central corridor. When they reached the camp, he let her go. He kneeled on the floor and spread the blankets out flat.
As her eyes adjusted, Audrey's confusion slowly turned to panic. "Y-You can't just kick me out in the dark. It's a four hour drive back to Colton Hills. When I can see!”
"Kick you out?" He turned to her. "I don't have time to explain.”
He reached for her arm again. This time, Audrey ducked his grasping fingers. She ran around the console, using it as a barrier between her body and his.
"Try," she said through gritted teeth.
"The steel predator is coming," he said with a sigh. "When it arrives, you cannot be here. However many hours it takes to get home, you must go there, Audrey, and you must go now.”
Audrey swallowed, too stunned to form words. When she could, a single word came to her lips.
"Raiders." Her mind reeled, grasping for something to say in response to the pipe bomb Haj had just thrown into her night.
I was supposed to have until sunrise.
"Was that so difficult?" she mumbled.
Haj hoisted the bundled blankets over one shoulder. With his free hand, he placed a gentle hand on Audrey's shoulder. "You need not fear. I will not let them harm you, aijan. We still have an hour before they arrive. Perhaps longer. Just get in your vehicle and drive. I will handle the rest.”
What did he just call me? Audrey didn't fight as he pulled her toward the front door. He let her go long enough to lift the metal security door, but once it was back down his warm fingers found her shoulder again. This was wrong. All wrong. Her night was ruined. Christmas was ruined.
The moonlight reflected off the snow on the ground, giving Audrey enough light to see the details of Haj’s face. He wore a worried but determined expression. He wasn’t lying. There was nothing for the raiders in Colton Hills, but here there was a warehouse the size of an abandoned football field ready for the taking.
"This plan sucks," Audrey said.
Haj opened the door of her truck and lifted her inside, giving no sign that he heard her.
"It leaves you on foot and unarmed,” she continued.
"I will be gone long before they get here."
Haj closed the driver's side door before Audrey could say anything else. His golden eye turned up at the corners as he smiled and waved to her. He seemed so confident in his plan. Why shouldn't he be? An hour was plenty of time for a man on foot to find a place to hide and Haj was a flying reindeer! The raiders would be too busy with the treasure trove in the depot to look for him.
So why did her heart revolt so violently against letting him walk away?
We were only ever going to have until sunrise.
Audrey shoved her key into the panel and pressed the button to start the engine. Nothing happened. She pressed the button again. Nothing. Again. Nothing. Panic rose in the back of her throat.
She turned to the window to shout for Haj, but he'd never left. He opened the door, taking her hand and guiding her back out of the truck. Audrey swallowed, but it did nothing to stop the rising bile.
"We must abandon the supplies." Haj looped an arm around her shoulder and craned his neck back toward the highway. He guided her away from the truck, toward the far side of the depot. "I do not believe I have time to hide it.”
"You should run. I'm too slow on foot, I'll slow you down." With every step, she felt a little number. If Haj left her behind, the raiders would kill her. If she were lucky, that was all they would do.
She wouldn't get to have her last Christmas with Phoebe. She wouldn't get to live out her days walking the creaky floors of Aunt Ruth's cabin. There was no reason Haj should die with her. He'd saved her life. He didn't owe her anything else.
Haj stopped in an open section of the side parking lot. He hooked a finger beneath Audrey's chin and tilted her face up. One second, his gold eye gazed down into her face and the next his lips brushed against hers. He claimed them in a sweet kiss. Audrey wanted to abandon herself in that kiss. After all, it was her last. But Haj pulled away too soon.
"I will do nothing of the kind, Audrey," he whispered into her hair. "But I need you to believe now, just for the next few minutes.”
"Believe in what?"
"In me." Haj stepped back. He held on to her hands until the last second, clinging by the fingertips until they couldn't touch anymore. "That I would die before I hurt you.”
This time, there was fear in Haj's expression. But somehow, Audrey knew it wasn't fear of the raiders or what the next fifty-five minutes would bring. He was only afraid of her.
Haj squatted and clenched his hands at his sides. He trembled and shook, groaning as bone and tissue separated and lengthened. The hair on his body thickened, then grew inch by inch until it completely hid his skin. His mouth extended forward from his skull. His nose looked like it would go along for the ride, but it puffed out until all that was left were two massive slits were his nostrils had been.
A sigh escaped his lips and Haj fell forward onto his hands–no, onto his hooves. His coat, shredded by his sudden expansion in length and girth, drifted to
the snow on either side of him.
Audrey's mouth fell open. She really had seen a reindeer and it had turned into a man before it hit the water.
"You're...you're a..." Audrey grasped for the word. Even though it was at the forefront of her brain, she couldn't make it appear on the tip of her tongue. The whole thing was just too farfetched. Too ridiculous! Alien reindeers definitely did not exist.
And if they did, they wouldn't be in Colton Hills, Oklahoma.
And if they were, Audrey absolutely would not have bumped uglies with one!
But there it—he—was, staring at her with one golden eye full of fear. Without words, the animal begged her to remember the man. He begged her to believe.
The reindeer that had been Haj padded forward slowly. It–he–tilted his long neck toward the ground, swinging his head toward his back. When he turned back to Audrey, he nudged her hand with his snout.
We don't have time, his eye said. Get on.
"I don't know how to ride," she said. "I've never even ridden a horse.”
Could he still understand her?
Haj tilted his head toward his back again. Get on.
Two instincts battled for dominance in her mind. The good old human fight-or-flight instinct told her that anywhere there was a shapeshifting reindeer was a place she should not be. This wasn't the old world and it wasn't the new. It was some dangerous future straight out of a science fiction novel, and Audrey wanted no part of it.
But the second instinct was more powerful than the first. Yet it was perfectly human and perfectly Audrey at the same time.
She wanted to live.
Audrey grabbed the remains of the coat from the snow and piled it on Haj's back.
Whoever and whatever he really was, if he was determined to perform the same miracle twice, that was sure as hell enough to get Audrey to believe.
8
Haj’erel