“Love you too,” I murmur, running my fingers over my swollen mouth.
“If he thinks that proves anything,” Cooper whispers in my ear, causing me to jump, “he’s a bigger fool than I thought.”
Conscious of Jensen’s attentive gaze, I blow a kiss in his direction, deliberately ignoring Cooper as I walk into class.
I take a seat in the back on purpose. Both desks on either side, and the three in front, are occupied. I smile to myself as I drop into the seat, fishing out my books. Cooper saunters into the room, grinning when he spots me. Idiot. He eats up the space pausing to stand at the desk in front of mine. Cocking his head to the side, he grins at the boy with the red hair seated in the chair. Less than a second later, the boy is on his feet, gathering up his books.
Oh, hell to the no. I hop up. “Sit down.” I jab my finger at him, and he frowns, his gaze jumping between Cooper and me. Cooper pierces him with an intense look.
He moves sideways out of the desk. “I don’t want to sit here any longer.”
The hell you don’t. You plonk your butt back down in that seat right this second.
The guy frowns again, scratching the back of his head, before promptly sitting back down in his seat.
Holy cow. Did he hear my thought? Did I do that?
“Are you moving or what?” Cooper asks, his amused expression morphing into one of obvious delight.
The boy holds one hand at the back of his neck, looking all around with a look of wild confusion on his face. The whole class is fascinated with the drama going down, and you could hear a pin drop in the room. Cooper levels him with another intense look and the guy jumps up again, shuffling out of the seat. “I’ll just sit up front.”
Sit back down!
The guy flops into the seat, and my mouth droops to the ground.
Cooper chuckles, murmuring softly so only I can hear. “You’ll never win, beautiful. This is my forte. Admit defeat.”
The guy jerks up suddenly, scampering out of the seat, and it’s a wonder he doesn’t trip over his feet in his haste to get to the empty chair at the front of the class. I’m too dazed by what just happened to bother fighting the inevitable any more. I go back to my seat, watching the puzzled expressions on all my classmates’ faces.
I’m with you, dudes.
I’ve no frigging idea what just transpired.
Cooper sits down at the desk in front of me, straddling the back of the chair. His blue eyes radiate smugness as he winks at me. Trying to ignore him when he’s right in my face is virtually impossible, but I promised Jensen. “Haven’t you ever heard of personal space? You’re crowding me, and I don’t like it.”
“Pfft. We both know that’s a downright lie.”
“Stop,” I hiss. “Everyone is watching.”
“So what?” He shrugs.
I count to ten in my head before replying in a calm, controlled manner. “I care what people are saying about me because it hurts my boyfriend. And I have reasons for not wanting to draw attention to myself. Please, Cooper.”
His features turn grave. “Valid point, and I’m not trying to make things difficult for you, I promise.”
“Then what do you want?” I lean toward him unconsciously, lowering my voice in the process.
He stares at me for a long minute. “It’s complicated. Why don’t you drop by our place after school, and we’ll try to explain?”
His brow furrows, his expression darkening. A muscle clenches in his jaw, and his eyes glaze over a little. I watch him with sharp eyes while the teacher calls the class to attention. Cooper doesn’t move a muscle, even when the teacher calls his name, requesting he turn around at his desk.
I kick him under the table, and he blinks, the haze clearing from his eyes. “Turn around,” I whisper, my cheeks heating up as I feel the glare of copious eyeballs.
Class starts, and I focus on concentrating.
Don’t tell Jensen the truth. He can’t find out. It isn’t safe.
My body locks up as the thought pops in my mind. I send daggers at the back of Cooper’s head, somehow knowing he’s responsible.
If you love him, you need to let him go.
I hiss under my breath, strangling the urge to slap him.
When class ends, I purposely hang back, and so does Cooper. Once everyone has left, I walk in front of his desk, speaking before he has a chance to open his mouth. “I know it’s you feeding thoughts in my mind, and I know this shit that’s happening to me is connected to you and your brothers, but I don’t want any part of it. I don’t know how to make myself any clearer. I like my life, I love my boyfriend, and I like being normal. In different ways, you’ve all told me you’re here for me.” I lean down, putting my face right up in his. “But I don’t want you here. I want you to pack up and leave so that my life can return to normal. If you want to do something for me, do that.”
I straighten up, fixing my bag on my shoulder as I watch his reaction.
He slowly stands up, piercing me with a sad smile. “I wish it were that simple, beautiful. But everything’s already in motion, Tori. There’s no going back.”
Chapter 18
Cooper’s words haunt me for the rest of the day. Despite what I agreed with Kylie last night, and despite promising Jensen I would explain stuff to him after school, I know I can’t continue to bury my head in the sand. I need to face up to this, whatever this is, and start taking control.
Something is happening to me, and it’s connected with the Roth brothers. Ignoring them will not make them go away. I need to confront them, find out what they know, and then figure out what I’m going to do. I can’t make an informed decision until I’m apprised of all the facts.
And, until I know exactly what I’m dealing with, I can’t spill the beans to Jensen. It’s no secret Cooper and Jensen aren’t fans of one another, but the words he planted in my head earlier were sincere. Don’t ask me how I know, but I can just tell. It isn’t competitive bullshit to separate me from my boyfriend. Cooper genuinely meant what he said, so I’d be a damn fool to ignore his warning. I won’t do anything to put Jensen at risk.
Which means I’m going to have to lie to him again.
I message Kylie telling her not to drop by the Roth place tonight. I promise to call her later to explain.
I have a heavy heart as Jensen drives us straight to the barn after school. Once inside, he powers up the small heater, and we snuggle on the couch under the thick, red plaid blanket. I rest my head on his shoulder as I’ve done a million times, wishing things could go back to the way they were.
“You know you can tell me anything, Tori,” he says, weaving his fingers through my hair. “Nothing you say will ever change how I feel about you, so if that’s what’s holding you back, don’t let it.”
God, he’s so intuitive. All afternoon, I’ve pondered what to say, settling on a watered-down version of the truth. “I haven’t been feeling myself since the accident, and I know I’m acting strange, but I’m at a loss as to how to explain it.”
“What do you mean?” he asks, pulling me into his lap. He brushes hair back off my face, parking his concerned gaze on mine.
“I’m pretty tired all the time, and I’m not sleeping properly because I’m getting flashbacks at night and I’m hallucinating and stuff.”
Tiny lines crease his brow. “I knew you should’ve gone to the hospital.” He shifts underneath me. “We’re going right this minute.” He moves to slide me off his lap, but I circle my hands around his wrists, stopping him in his tracks.
“Stop,” I say softly, hating this next part. “Mom already took me the other night.”
“She did?” He looks skeptical.
“Yep. I had a full checkup, and everything is fine. They think it’s just stress from the accident and it will settle down in time.”
I hold my breath as I wait to see if he accepts the lie. He snakes his arms around my waist, and I rest my head on his chest, welcoming the familiar steady beat of his heart, which is
helping to take the edge off my guilt. Protecting my guy is all important, even if it means lying to him.
“You should’ve told me.”
“I didn’t want you to worry.”
“I’m your boyfriend. It’s my job to worry about you.” He pecks my lips, and I close my eyes, squeezing him tighter, wanting to cling to him and never let go.
“And you’re wonderful at it, which is why I was hesitant to tell you. I know you’ve got a lot on your plate with school, your inventions, helping your dad around the farm, and looking after your mom.” Jensen’s mom was diagnosed with breast cancer a few months ago. She’s had chemotherapy and a mastectomy, and while the indicators are good, she’s been very tired and not able to do much. Mom drops over a few times a week to help her with cleaning and laundry, and I cook dinner for them when I have any downtime, but a lot of the burden has fallen to Jensen because his dad has had to take on extra work around the farm after my dad’s injury and he’s not home a lot.
“I always have time for you, baby. You’re the most important person in my universe, and if something’s bothering you, then I need to know. I’m sorry if I gave you the impression I didn’t have time for you.”
I shake my head. “You haven’t at all. I just didn’t want to bug you with it.”
Silence engulfs us for a few seconds. “And what about the Roth brothers. What’s that all about?”
“Your guess is as good as mine, but I feel a connection to them. I just don’t know why.” His face drops, and his arms loosen around my waist. “It’s not what you’re thinking.” I tilt his face up. “It’s really hard to properly explain it, but it’s like I’ve known them previously or something. It feels” — I grapple for the right word—“comfortable to be around them.”
A muscle ticks in his tight jaw. “That’s not exactly reassuring me, babe.”
“They were adopted too. Kylie thinks that might be the connection.”
“You spoke to Kylie about this?”
“Yeah.” Silence descends again. “She’s my best friend,” I add, feeling the need to defend myself.
“I thought I was.”
I thread my fingers through the messy waves in his hair. “You’re my everything, Jensen, and you know I confide in Kylie. I’ve never made any secret of that.”
He decides to let that go. “I don’t see how your mutual adoptive status makes any difference. You were a baby when your parents took you from the orphanage. You’d hardly remember them from back then.”
I sigh, leaning my head on his shoulder again. “I know. It doesn’t make sense, but you asked me to tell you what’s going on and I am.”
If this was a different era, I’d expect to be burned at the stake for all the half-truths I’m spinning.
“I suppose a connection from your past would go some way toward explaining their fascination with you, but it’s probably way simpler than that.” I lift my head, imploring him to continue with my eyes. “You’re gorgeous, Tori, and I know I’m batting out of my league. If we lived anywhere but this sleepy old town, I’d be fighting guys off left and right, but we’ve grown up around here, and everyone knows we belong together. No dude at school would dare to make a move on you.”
Try telling that to Jack. I think it, but I don’t say it.
“I’ve always thought you had me on too high of a pedestal, and I hate hearing you put yourself down. We’re equals, Jensen.” I caress his cheek. “We’ve always been equals.”
He kisses the tip of my nose. “See, that’s one of the things I love about you. You genuinely believe that, and you’re not one of those girls obsessed with how she looks. I know you believe that, but it’s not the truth. I thought I’d prepared myself for college, because I know guys will trample me to get to you, but since those assholes showed up, I can hardly contain my rage. I don’t want to lose you, Tori.” He grips the back of my neck, talking softly. “You’re my everything too.”
He kisses me urgently, possessively, pouring all his fears and worries into the kiss. I kiss him back, lacing every brush of my lips with love, hoping it’s enough to reassure him, when the truth is I’m terrified too.
I had intended on swinging by the old Johnson place before the game, but Jensen and I got hot and heavy in the barn, and then we snuggled up watching some TV on the couch, and I didn’t want to move from his arms.
As we walk hand in hand to the gym later, I’m feeling happier in our relationship than I have all week and confident that we can weather the incoming storm.
We take seats on the bleachers beside Kylie, Hunter, Zara, and her boyfriend Ethan. As if she has a sixth sense, Kenzie turns around, waving at us as she limbers up on the floor. As always, she makes the slightly dated yellow, gold, and white cheerleader’s uniform look totally hot. I spot her blowing a kiss in Fletcher’s direction and I smile. Jensen was true to his word, and he got the lowdown for Kenzie. Wasting no time, she jumped right back on that saddle, asking Fletcher to the Winter Formal. She was delighted when he agreed, and he also asked her out this weekend, so she’s ecstatic, and I’m thrilled she is finally moving on from her sleazy ex.
So, as we wait for the game to start, I take a second to appreciate the moment. My relationship with Jensen is back on track, I’m hanging with my friends, laughing and joking, and things seem normal. It’s amazing how great that feels.
It doesn’t take long for my euphoria to fade.
A rush of electricity skates over my skin, and that odd inner energy starts pulsing and jumping with the movement of feet in the row behind. I groan, placing my head in my hands, knowing there’s no way in hell Jensen won’t spot them.
“Hey, beautiful,” Cooper says from behind me, not even a second after the bench creaks under his weight.
Jensen closes his eyes, and I can almost see him mentally counting to ten.
I ignore Cooper, hoping he’ll just vaporize.
“Hi, Tori,” Beckett says in a less garish tone than his brother, and a pained expression sweeps across my face.
It’s way harder to ignore Cooper’s sweet brother. I give Jensen’s hand a quick squeeze, as I turn my head and nod at the four guys. “Hey, guys. Enjoy the game.” I offer them a brief smile before turning back around.
“Wow,” Cooper exclaims, poking his head in the gap between me and Jensen. “I think that’s what they call the brush-off.”
“Glad you know one when you see it,” Jensen retorts without looking at him.
“Are you always this possessive, or is it just with me?”
“Knock it off, Cooper.” I crick my head from side to side to alleviate the growing tension in my muscles. “We’re here to support the team, not go another round with you.”
“That might hurt if I didn’t know better.” He leans down again, brushing the side of my hair back and whispering in my ear, “But I do.”
Jensen grinds his teeth, deliberately moving closer to me and forcing Cooper back.
Sounds of scuffling hit my ears. “Quit that shit, Mad Dog,” Cooper exclaims. “For fuck’s safe. Lay off!”
I’m itching to turn around to see what’s happening, but I daren’t risk it with Jensen on the brink of full-blown personal nuclear detonation.
“Stop hassling the lady,” Maddox says, his polite words at odds with his gruff tone, bringing a surprise smile to my mouth.
“Just focus on the game,” Dane adds. “And we already spoke about this. I’m not in the habit of repeating myself.” His tone is suffused with warning, sending shivers up my spine. I stand over my first impression of him—Dane is scary, but there’s also something very intriguing about that side of his personality that calls to me. I guess I can understand why Kylie’s attracted to him.
“Yes, Dad.” Cooper’s tone is resentful, and I’m guessing this isn’t the first time Dane’s had to take him to task.
Kylie titters, and both Hunter and Jensen shoot daggers in her direction, silencing her on the spot.
It appears the Roth brother ban extends
to my friends too.
I think we’re going to be in for a long night.
Chapter 19
The game starts, demanding our attention, and I’m glad for a reprieve from all the heightened emotions in the air. The guys are remarkably quiet behind us though it does nothing to quell my potent awareness of them. I’m on edge the entire time, the connection buzzing, happy to be close but frustrated at not being closer. Jensen keeps a protective arm around me, and I sense the strain in his body too. His earlier words poke holes in my heart. I had no idea he felt like that or that he’d already been trying to psych himself up for college. I still think he’s going overboard on the whole “everyone wants you” bit, but telling him that will not strip his erratic fear away.
At half time, Hunter gets up to go to the concession stand. “You want me to get your usual?” Jensen asks, standing alongside his friend.
“Sure. Thanks.” I beam at him, and he bends down, capturing my lips in a searing hot kiss, one that’s far too intimate for an audience, but I don’t pull back or reprimand him. I know he needs to do this. When he brings the kiss to a close, he rubs his nose against mine. “Love you, babe.”
“Love you too.” I smile as he walks off with Hunter.
Someone makes a gagging noise behind me, and it doesn’t take much to figure out who. I turn around, fury rampant on my face as I prod my finger in Cooper’s general direction. “What the hell is your problem?”
“I’m just acknowledging what everyone’s thinking. That shit ain’t cool in public, and I think I could genuinely puke.” He rubs his tummy in a dramatic fashion.
“How the hell do you guys live with him?” I ask the others truthfully.
“It’s not easy, but someone’s got to do it,” Beckett teases. Dane pouts, watching the conversation as if he’s a neutral bystander, as usual.
“I beat on his ass every now and then,” Maddox admits with a hint of a grin, “and that usually keeps him quiet for a bit.”
“Like hell you do,” Cooper protests. “Brute strength doesn’t always make you the smartest fighter. You’d do well to remember Nebraska.”
The Lost Savior Page 13