“There’s no basis for them now!” I cried. “Me marry Nico? It’s ridiculous!”
Dad nodded slowly. “Ye-es. But they’re not just saying that you’re going to marry Nico. They’re saying that your sister failed at something a part of her wants to do. Maybe not with Dmitri or Kostin or Nico, but it’s a life she wants. And to be constantly reminded that you, who wants nothing to do with any of this, is thought to have succeeded? Her pride is hurt, Tati.”
“I don’t know what to do about it, Dad.”
“I don’t either. I’m not good at this part of parenting. This was always Mum’s area of expertise. I want to be able to give you girls any advice you need, but Lia and I have never connected like you and I have about matters of the heart.”
I rearranged on my seat. “We’re too cynical for her.”
“And she’s too romantic for us. Which is why I chicken out and leave this stuff to Mum.”
“You’re lucky she’s here then.”
“I am.”
I sighed. “I miss being able to just be friends with people. I feel like I can’t be myself here, Dad. I can’t say the things I used to or act the way I used to. I feel like I’m watching my every move and I still manage to mess it up.”
“Like when you’re trying to sneak ice cream in the middle of the night and keep crashing into things when you’re trying to be deadly silent.”
I snorted. “Yes. Just like that.”
“Or when you go to tea with a marquise and call her out in front of her friends completely by accident.”
I huffed, less amused. “Yes. Also just like that.”
Dad smiled. “Kiddo, you’re doing amazingly well. You’re arrival time was…in many ways unfortunate. With Dmitri’s looming engagement and the unrest down south, you’ve been a focus you might not otherwise have been.”
“What do they have to do with it?”
“Well, your assumed relationship with Nico is…juicier to the press at the moment because of the impending announcement. It stirs excitement to think that Nico might be engaged before or at the same time as his eldest brother.”
“So they’re not allowed to be engaged before an older one?”
Dad looked like he was choosing his words carefully. “No. It’s allowed…”
“But?”
“But it would be cause for speculation. Dmitri is under immense pressure with this engagement announcement. He’s fighting centuries of tradition, a country who both demands it and wants it to change, as well as his own heart. The boy is nothing if not loyal to his country and he would lay down his life before he questioned any other requirement in service to it. But when it comes to marriage?”
“Doe he not want to be king?”
“He out of all his brothers sees that it is as much a burden as it is a boon. At his heart, he is a soldier. He wants to be beside his fellow man, working for the country together. Not held apart from them because of protocol and tradition.”
“He doesn’t like tradition?”
“What do you think?”
“Me?”
Dad nodded. “You’ve spent some time with him. What do you think?”
I thought about it. “I think he respects it and understands why it is necessary, but I think he wants to do what’s best for the people. If they want less tradition, then he wants to give it to them. But then there’s lots of people who still want it from his family. There are people who want to get rid of some traditions and want to keep others. It’s not cut and dry and that makes him unsure how he can help.”
Dad only just managed to hide his surprise.
“What?” I asked. “I pay some attention.”
“I know. I just didn’t know you knew so much about the unrest.”
I shrugged. “I’ve been trying to keep up with it all. But I don’t think I understand everything.”
“And I don’t expect you to. It’s ingrained. It’s a hard thing to come in a just pick up. You need to be aware of centuries of politics and events. Even I sometimes wonder how we got where we have. But all I can do is try to dissipate the problem–”
“Like when I was used as a distraction?”
Dad’s grin was a little cheeky. “That wasn’t my idea, kiddo.”
“But you let it happen.”
He nodded. “I did. I didn’t think it would hurt anything. There was…a particular issue we didn’t want to deal with and so we gave you to the press in the hopes they’d forget about it, at least until we had a decent answer for them.”
“What didn’t you want to deal with?”
Dad ran a hand over his jaw and looked at me. “There’s been discussion of sending more men to what has been termed the front lines. It’s not like a full blown warzone. There aren’t huge battles. But there have been some skirmishes between rebels and royal troops, and some civilians have been injured. The press wants to know what the crown intends to do about protecting the people. Dmitri has one idea, Arnell has another and Rex doesn’t know who he wants to listen to unless it means putting Dmitri back on active service.”
“So the rebels are bad?”
Dad shook his head. “No. They’re…just a group of people who feel that they’re out of options. That doesn’t make them bad or good.”
“But if they’re hurting people?”
Dad sighed. “The way these things go, kiddo… They won’t be the only ones before this is over.”
I realised then that I was as yet probably too naïve myself for the conversation. “Can I do anything?”
Dad shook his head. “No. Thanks. It just requires a lot of arguing late into the night and a lot of circuitous conversations. We’ll get there eventually. It’s just a slow process. No one wants to make a hasty decision that turns out to be the wrong one, but not doing anything isn’t the best decision either. It’s not for you to worry about, kiddo. There are plenty of other people happy to be involved.”
I got up and gave him a hug that he returned tightly. “I guess I’ll offer my distraction services as often as necessary though.”
Dad laughed. “I’m not sure using you as a distraction is the best decision either.”
“No. I’ll be knocked up by Dmitri, have broken Nico’s heart and be engaged to Kostin next.”
Dad grinned widely. “Probably.” We just looked at each other for a moment with warm smiles, until Dad asked, “Shall we go and see how Mum’s doing with damage control?”
I nodded. “Sure. But we might need chocolate.”
Dad stood up and put his arm around my shoulder. “I think we might.”
Chapter Ten
We were back at the palace. The whole family – and Nico – for the Christmas Eve Ball that night.
Lia and I had left our parents chatting with Rex and Hilde over morning tea and were heading to see Madame Jacqueline for a final fitting for our gowns. We were being followed, as always in Albia, by Nikolai and Neil.
“So he really goes to uni with you?” I asked Lia, looking back to Neil, who I would have said was glaring at me had I not known that was just his face.
“He does.”
“Does he escort you into the loos?”
She rolled her eyes at me, seemingly relaxed for a moment with no one else in the hallway. “He waits outside.”
“Does that not freak everyone out? Like they assume there’s some whacko loony in there or something?”
She shrugged. “People got used to him pretty quickly.”
“Is it an age thing then? We come of age and then we get a bodyguard? Is it supposed to help maintain our virtue?” I knew full well why we had them but I wasn’t about to miss an opportunity to tease my older sister.
Lia snorted. “Dad knows that ship sailed for you a while ago, Tati.”
I conceded that one. “You think whichever lord they try to marry me off to will mind?”
“I didn’t think you were going to let them marry you off to a noble?”
/> I shrugged. “Well I might let this lavish lifestyle go to my head and need someone to keep me in the manner to which I become accustomed. Plus I totes need someone who is my societal equal.”
“Because you’re such a snob.”
“Such.”
We laughed, things being a little easier than they had been a few days earlier. Lia was still a little pensive, but once I got her smiling she stayed that way. And that was when I noticed Dmitri was walking down the hallway from the other direction with Samson and a man I’d seen him with a couple of times but didn’t know.
It felt very much like the first time I’d seen him in person, despite it being merely a week. My physical reaction to him couldn’t be stopped, even as I kept reminding myself he was a total arse and not worth my time. But my body didn’t want to listen to reason or logic – my mouth went dry, my stomach fluttered at the sight of him, and my mind was insistent that we remember the time we ran into him in the kitchen in nothing but tracksuit pants.
“You okay?” Lia asked and I blinked.
“What?”
“Are you okay? You seemed to…I don’t know, stumble a little.”
Seriously? I huffed. “Fine. Thanks.”
“Prince Dmitri,” she said, pausing to curtsey and I fumbled in my attempt to copy her and not look like a spaz at the same time.
“Lady Malmont. I imagine you are happy to be on break now?”
Lia smile politely, her hands clasped in front of her. “I am yes, your highness.”
I saw Madame Jacqueline ahead and smiled at her then noticed that Dmitri was looking at me. I gave him another awkward curtsey, my chest fluttering wildly for some reason, and he bowed to me more deeply than I would have expected.
“Lady Tatiana.”
“Your highness.”
There was silence for a moment as Dmitri and I just looked at each other and I felt the eyes of every other person in the hallway on us. But I couldn’t move, I was pinned by whatever swirled in those dark brown eyes. It made me nervous as all hell and I wasn’t sure why it should. I didn’t like him. I just liked the look of him. I liked the look of Jason Momoa too, but I didn’t come over all unnecessary every time I saw him on a screen.
“Anya,” Lia hissed and I turned to see her giving Dmitri, Samson and the other man an apologetic smile.
I cleared my throat and forced myself not to get stuck staring at Dmitri’s eyes. “Uh, yes. We are due at a gown fitting for tonight.”
Oh dear God. I sounded more stilted than the time I was made to be an actual actor in the Year Eight play in Drama and all my lines came out like the lady who mispronounces all the road names on Google Maps.
“I will not keep you.” Dmitri gave another bow.
Samson, the other guy, and Lia started moving off but Dmitri and I just stood staring at each other for a second.
“Your highness?” Samson said and Dmitri looked at him.
“Ja. Have a good day, Lady Tatiana.”
I blinked, but managed not to say something resembling questioning some niceness out of him. “Takke. You…also.”
I gave one more curtsey and hurried off, dragging Lia along until we got to Madame Jacqueline. The seamstress had a significant air of ‘I know something you don’t know’ about her, but she always had this incredible confidence about her that made me feel suitably inferior.
“Lady Malmont. Lady Tatiana. It is wonderful to see you both again. I have your dresses ready for tonight.”
She waved us in and got Lia organised first.
I sat down while Lia got changed and Madame Jacqueline and her assistants helped Lia into her gown. I personally thought she looked amazing, but I had a feeling Lia was feeling differently as she looked at her reflection in utter disbelief. It was the least composed I’d seen her since I’d arrived in Gallyr.
“What’s wrong, Lia?” I asked her teasingly.
“It’s backless,” she spluttered, looking between me and Madame Jacqueline like one of us had all the answers.
“It is,” I teased.
And it was. The skirt was layers and layers of green tulle, and the top was a beautifully figure-hugging dark green velvet. It was long-sleeved with a turtle-neck (but the classy kind) and it was backless. Of course it was backless in the most refined possible way – she says like she has any idea about supposed haute fashion.
“Tati!” Lia cried. “This is not funny. My Christmas Ball gown is backless!”
I snorted in my effort to not laugh and I nodded. “You still look beautiful.”
“We could not very well have Lady Tatiana’s dress be my first backless creation,” Madame Jacqueline said and Lia’s head snapped around to her.
“Her what now?”
“It will show off her beautiful tattoo wonderfully.”
Lia’s head snapped to me. “You have a tattoo?”
I nodded slowly. “Ye-es…”
“Why haven’t I seen it?”
“Um… Because it’s the middle of winter and it’s given me a marvellous chance to keep it hidden thus far.”
“Let me see it!”
I knew not to laugh at her based on the look on her face. It was the one where she wasn’t messing around and was about two wrong words away from pulling out the big sister arsenal. I had to admit that I wasn’t sure of all the weapons in the arsenal, but Lia’s favourites thus far had been telling Mum and/or Dad something I didn’t want them to know (usually that I’d broken curfew again or the first time I’d had sex) and pulling my hair.
I wasn’t too keen on either of those things just then. Plus we usually, mostly told each other everything, which was why she had so much ammunition in her arsenal. So I sighed and turned around as I pulled my sweater around my neck so she could see. I heard Lia’s indrawn breath and the rustle of material before she had her cold fingers on my skin.
“It’s big. I mean not big big, but it’s definitely there.”
I laughed. “Is that your way of saying you don’t like it?”
“No. No,” she said quickly. It felt like her fingers were tracing the design. “I’m sort of jealous.”
“You have the capability of getting a tattoo if you want it,” I reminded her.
“No. Well yes. But I would be way too scared and I don’t even know what I’d get. It’s so…permanent. Are the roses for Gramps?”
I nodded. Mum’s dad had been one of our favourite people growing up and he’d been an avid lover of roses. He and Great Gran hadn’t got along so well because he was very fond of annoying his mother-in-law and siding against her in everything. Which usually meant he was siding with me.
“Does Mum know?” she asked.
I nodded again. “Yeah. She went with me.”
“And Dad?”
I shrugged as I pulled my sweater back down. “Mum tells him everything, doesn’t she?”
“I thought you told me everything!”
“Yeah… Usually.”
“So why didn’t you tell me this? And what does it have to do with my gown being backless?” Lia huffed.
“I dunno. I guess I thought you might look down on me for it. It’s not very ladylike.”
“Ladylike, shmadylike. You’re my little sister, Tati.”
I gave her a small smile. “Yeah. Okay. I’m sorry. You can come watch my next one?”
“When are you getting it?”
“Sometime after Mum leaves.”
Lia nodded knowingly. “So she doesn’t complain even more about how we’re growing up.”
I nodded in agreement. “That.”
“Okay. I’ll think about it. But what does this have to do with my dress?”
I looked to Madame Jacqueline and grinned. “I agreed that my New Years dress could show off my tattoo…”
“And I thought we would get away with it if you had a backless dress first, my lady,” Madame Jacqueline added.
“I’m a guinea pig?” Lia asked.
>
“Basically. Yes.”
“And if Dad murders me?”
“Then I’ll meet you in Hell a week later when my ink is on display for the whole country to see.”
“Why am I going to Hell?”
“I dunno. You’ll miss me too much otherwise?”
Lia watched me for a moment, then nodded. “Okay. Deal.”
“Let us check the fit now, Lady Malmont,” Madame Jaqueline said with a smile.
Lia complied and I watched while they checked her over and then it was my turn.
My gown was, in my mind, so very not me. But it was the sort of not me I didn’t mid dressing up as for a night. It was in a deep, dark blue. Like Lia’s the skirt was princess poufy, but the top was also made of tulle or something similar. It was as off-the-shoulder and sweethearty as we could get without anything slipping out (front or back). The neckline was lacy with what almost looked like glittery snowflakes, and the skirt seemed to have specks of glitter shining through it. And there were matching elbow-length gloves to go with it.
When Madame Jacqueline was happy with our dresses, Lia and I left, being told that our maids would have them in our rooms in time to change that night, and made our way to lunch.
“So Kostin’s taking you tonight?” I asked her.
Lia nodded. “I presume Nico’s escorting you?”
“I think so. He’s mentioned it at least…four times.”
Lia laughed. “Watch out or you’ll be leading him and the country on.”
“Pfft,” I scoffed. “Nico knows where we stand. We’re just friends.”
“Who flirt.”
“Yes.”
“And you’re sure he’s not getting the wrong idea?”
“He’s as insincere as always.”
“Lady Tatiana!” the prince in question called with a warm smile.
Lia nodded, but she didn’t look convinced. “Uh huh.”
“Shut up,” I muttered, then said to Nico, “Your highness.”
“Hungry?”
“Always,” I replied.
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