It was Tuesday, which meant Bailey family dinner. And a too-full-to-function Gavin. But Gram had made pork chops and potatoes, so who could blame me for stuffing my face? Her cooking was the best.
Asher and Grace sat across from me, and Fiona and Evan were on my left. Levi and Logan were both off duty tonight, so they were here too. And Gram sat in her usual spot.
If any more of us brought someone home, Gram was going to need a bigger table.
Not that it was likely. Logan didn’t exactly date girls you brought home to meet your family. And Levi didn’t date at all, as far as I knew. Or if he did, he kept quiet about it.
What was Skylar doing tonight?
That was a weird thought to have out of nowhere.
I peeked at my phone just in case she’d texted me. She hadn’t, which was oddly disappointing, since I wasn’t expecting her to. But I hadn’t seen her today and I was kind of bummed about that.
Actually, I was a lot bummed about that.
But her friend was in town, so she was busy.
And okay, I was kind of pouting because I’d been hoping to do something with her today.
“So are we going to talk about it, or just pretend it isn’t today?” Asher asked.
His question got my attention, because like everyone else in this room—with the possible exception of Fiona, unless Evan had told her—I knew exactly what he was talking about.
It was our mom’s birthday.
“Mom’s birthday,” Levi said, echoing my thought.
The table quieted, like it always did when we acknowledged our parents. I kept my eyes on my empty plate, bracing myself for the inevitable. For everyone to start talking about them.
I hated it when they did that.
“How old would she have been this year?” Logan asked.
“Fifty-four,” Gram said.
“Do you guys remember when Dad threw her a big birthday party?” Asher asked.
“Vaguely,” Evan said.
I didn’t. I’d probably been a baby.
“I just remember bits and pieces of it,” Asher said. “I think Dad put trick candles on her cake.”
“He did,” Gram said with a soft smile. “By the time she realized they were going to keep lighting after she blew them out, she was laughing too hard to try.”
“I remember how much they smiled,” Grace said. “They always seemed so happy.”
“They were,” Gram said. “Their love was big. For each other and for their boys.”
I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, hoping they’d change the subject.
“The thing I remember most is her reading to us,” Logan said. “It’s not a clear memory, but it seems like she did that a lot.”
Levi nodded. “I remember that, too. I think she did.”
“On the couch before bed,” Evan said. “And we’d fight over who got to sit next to her. Except Gavin. He sat on her lap.”
“Oh yeah,” Logan said, his mouth twitching with a smile.
I didn’t say anything. Because I didn’t remember any of it.
I didn’t remember them.
When they’d died, Asher had been nine, Evan around eight. The twins had been six. All old enough to form lasting memories of our parents, even if they were only vague ones. Even Grace remembered them. But I’d been four—too young to keep any of those memories.
I knew what they’d looked like, but only because I’d seen pictures. I knew stories about them, but only the things I’d been told. None of it lived in my head. I couldn’t conjure a single image of my mother or my father. Not even one.
And I hated that I was the only one who couldn’t.
Still, I didn’t want to be an asshole about it. So whenever this happened, and everyone seemed to need to talk about them, I just kept my mouth shut until it was over.
Tonight, though, the subject made me fidget. My leg itched inside my cast and my ass hurt from the way I’d been sitting. I shifted in my chair again.
Asher kissed the back of Grace’s hand. Fiona leaned against Evan’s shoulder. Logan glanced at Levi and he nodded, as if Logan had said something out loud—but he hadn’t. Silent acknowledgments of shared grief, and shared comfort.
I didn’t have anything to add and my mood was quickly turning shitty. Which meant it was time for me to go.
“We’ll take care of your plate, Otter,” Gram said.
She was such a mind reader.
“Thanks.” I pushed myself to my feet and hopped to where I’d leaned my crutches against the wall. “I’ll see you guys later.”
“You heading home?” Levi asked.
“Yeah. Eventually.”
“You okay, brocamole?” Logan asked.
“Other than my leg itching, yeah.” I went over to Gram and leaned down to give her a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks for dinner. I’m stuffed.”
“Have a good night, Otter,” she said. “Be careful out there.”
“I’m always careful.”
Logan snorted.
I’d have flipped him off, but there was no way to do that without Gram seeing. “Later.”
I went out to my truck and climbed in. My body thrummed with restlessness. Dissatisfaction. I was no stranger to this feeling, but normally when I got this edgy I was able to do something about it—do something with the excess energy coursing through me.
I’d jump in the river or off a waterfall. Go rock climbing, or ice climbing in the winter. Maybe grab Logan or some friends and see what kind of trouble we could get into in town. Have a few beers, maybe pick up some girls.
None of that was working for me right now, either because I physically couldn’t—stupid broken leg—or because it just didn’t sound like any fun.
I really was in a shitty mood if going into town, getting a few beers, and picking up girls didn’t sound like fun.
My whole body ached with the desire to move. To climb and sweat and balance on the edge of… anything. I was the shark again, swimming too slowly to stay alive.
Drowning.
I couldn’t climb anything right now, but I could still get around—sort of. I drove out to where the old railroad tracks crossed through town. They were long abandoned—no more trains chugged through Tilikum like they had in the old days. Which made it a good place for a flat hike.
It was dark, and there was a chance I might come across a wild animal. Not exactly ideal conditions, but maybe that was why I’d come out here. I needed to do something, and if I couldn’t do any of my usual things, an after dusk walk down the train tracks by myself scratched at least some of that itch.
Gravel crunched as I walked alongside the track, the only noise in the dark stillness. It was getting colder, especially at night, and the chill air tickled my nose.
Movement on the other side of the tracks caught my eye. There was something over there, near the trees. Small, though. It didn’t seem big enough to be a raccoon, but maybe it was a baby. Which wouldn’t exactly be good news. Mama raccoons were vicious when they were protecting their young.
It was possible I knew that from experience.
I got out my phone to use as a flashlight, shining the beam of light into the trees.
A squirrel sat at the base of a tree, its gray tail standing up like a bushy little flagpole. That was weird. I didn’t think squirrels were nocturnal.
It came closer, then stopped on the track. I didn’t know why it would be out after dark, but it probably associated humans with food.
“I don’t have anything, dude.”
It darted ahead, following the track, then stopped and looked back at me.
I felt like I was about to be pranked. Why else would a squirrel be out at night, acting like it wanted me to follow?
Because it was really acting like it wanted me to follow.
Had Fiona trained this one? She’d trained the squirrels out at Evan’s house to go through an obstacle course. That had come in handy when we’d loosed Tilikum’s squirrel population on the Timberbeast Tavern—the
Havens’ hangout—after they’d pulled off an admittedly spectacular prank involving goats, peanut butter, and bird seed.
But no one had told me to come down here, so how could they have set up a squirrel prank aimed at me?
Still, this was weird.
But obviously I was going to follow it.
As soon as I started moving again, it ran along the rail, disappearing into the darkness ahead.
“This is fast as I go, buddy.”
When I caught up, he’d gotten off the track and waited about six feet away, on the far side. Careful not to trip over the rail or wood beams, I crossed the tracks.
He darted away and ran up a tree.
Shaking my head, I laughed at myself. A random squirrel was running around in the dark and I’d thought he was leading me somewhere.
In my defense, Tilikum squirrels weren’t normal. He could have been leading me somewhere.
A tiny noise caught my attention, so faint I wasn’t sure I’d actually heard anything. I held my breath. There it was again.
I moved closer to the trees. Whatever it was, it was low to the ground. I shined the light around, looking. Because it almost sounded like—
A pair of eyes glowed bright when my light moved past. Cat eyes.
Kitten eyes, to be exact.
It was curled up in a small hollow at the base of a tree, but it wasn’t much of a shelter. It mewed at me—a tiny sound that tugged at something in my chest.
I swept the light around, looking for any sign of the mother cat or the rest of the litter. But the kitten was alone.
“Hey, little one.” I leaned my crutches against the tree and crouched down. “Are you all by yourself out here?”
The kitten crept out of the hole to sniff my outstretched fingers. Its fur was dirty. I didn’t know a lot about cats, but I knew if this kitten had a mom, it would be cleaner than this.
I scooped it up and peeked under the tail. Pretty sure it was a girl.
Jesus, she weighed nothing. Just a scrap of fur in my hand.
Her little mews sounded like she was crying now, so I tucked her against my chest and gently rubbed the top of her head with my thumb.
“Shh. You’re okay.”
Obviously I was taking her with me.
I couldn’t carry her and walk with my crutches, so I slipped her into my front coat pocket. It was high on my chest and just big enough that her skinny little body fit inside with her head poking out. Hoping she wouldn’t jump out, I grabbed my crutches and started back toward my truck.
Maybe the squirrel had been leading me somewhere after all.
“You need a mommy, don’t you little snuggle nugget? Well, now you have one.”
The kitten settled into my pocket, her tiny mews quieting. Did Skylar like cats? Not that she needed to like cats for me to have one, but it made me wonder. I kind of wanted to go straight to her house to show her.
Okay, I really wanted to go straight to her house to show her.
Mostly because now that I was thinking about her again, I wanted to see her. And that strange preoccupation made me hesitate. Besides, it was late. We’d hang out again sometime—hopefully soon—and I could introduce her to my new baby.
For now, I’d get this little squeaker home.
13
Gavin
The kitten’s tiny claws pinched my skin as she climbed up my shirt. I gave her a hand, helping her settle on my shoulder. She liked it up there, and she was so small I barely noticed her, except for the slight tickle of fur against my neck.
She’d spent the night curled up in bed with me, happily purring. I’d taken her to the vet first thing this morning. Dr. Lennox had said she was lucky I’d found her. She was barely old enough to be away from her mom. They’d cleaned her up—turned out she was black and white—and given me special food for her. Other than being tiny and hungry, she seemed to be in good health. She just needed to put a little weight on and she should be okay.
Levi walked in and stopped in his tracks. “What’s that?”
“What’s what?” I asked around a bite of cereal.
“Is that an animal?”
“She’s a kitten. I found her by the train tracks.”
“You brought a stray cat home?”
“What was I supposed to do? Leave her out there?”
He eyed her, his brow furrowing. “No. But you don’t think you’re keeping her, do you?”
“Of course I’m keeping her. She needs a mommy.”
“A mommy?”
I just took another bite of cereal.
“I don’t think we’re supposed to have pets in this house.”
“Who has a pet?” Logan came out of his room looking rumpled, like he’d just woken up.
“Gavin brought home a stray cat.”
Logan stopped and looked around. “Seriously? Where?”
“She’s sleeping,” I said. “Don’t wake her up, you guys, she’s been through a lot.”
“What are you going to do with it?” Logan asked, peering at the kitten on my shoulder.
“That’s a weird question,” I said. “I’m going to take care of her. I’m her cat mom.”
“I think you mean cat dad.”
I rolled my eyes. “No, I mean cat mom. According to Google, it’s primarily the female cat who cares for her kittens. The cat dad might help her out, but it’s just as likely that he won’t. My little squeaker here doesn’t need a cat dad, she needs a cat mom.”
“Dude, having a pet is a big responsibility,” Levi said. “She needs a litter box and veterinary care and—”
“Way ahead of you. Took her to the vet this morning and picked up a litter box on the way home. But thanks for the tip.”
“I’m just saying—”
“You’re just saying you don’t think I can handle taking care of a kitten.”
“That is what it sounded like,” Logan said.
“Do you think he can take care of a kitten?” Levi asked, gesturing to me.
Logan shrugged. “Probably not.”
“See?”
I glared at them both. “You guys realize I’m no longer ten, right?”
“You’ve just never had to take care of anything besides yourself,” Levi said.
“And let’s be real, your track record there is questionable,” Logan added, gesturing to my leg.
“Whatever, Chip and Dale. I’ve got this.”
Levi glanced at Logan. “Apparently we have a cat now.”
“Are we allergic to cats?” Logan asked.
“I’m not,” Levi said.
“Well if you’re not, I’m not.”
I shook my head and shoveled more cereal into my mouth. The kitten rubbed her head against my neck and I reached up to give her a little pet with my index finger.
“Gram said her furnace was making a weird noise, so I’m heading over there to check it out,” Levi said.
Logan dropped into a chair and raked his fingers through his messy hair. “Need help?”
“No, I’ve got it.”
“Cool. I told Chief I’d come in and help with a training exercise,” Logan said.
I grunted, mildly jealous. Chief usually had me come in to help with training exercises. Stupid broken leg.
“What are you doing today?” Logan asked. “Other than being a cat mom?”
“I don’t know. I have an appointment with Sven, but that’s it.”
“Who’s Sven?”
“Cara’s massage therapist.”
“Wait, what?”
I poked at my cereal with my spoon. “I’m getting a massage by a guy with magic hands. Cara set it up for me.”
“Who said he has magic hands? Cara?”
“Yeah. I guess he does Grace, too. He’s supposed to be really good.”
“What the fuck? Does Asher know about this?”
“That his wife got a massage?”
“No, that a fucking guy named Sven was touching her.”
“I don’t know. Probabl
y. It’s a massage, bro, those are a thing.”
Scowling, he glanced away.
The corner of my mouth twitched in a grin. “Are you jealous?”
“Jealous that you’re getting a massage? If I want a massage, I can go get one. I don’t need some dude named Sven.”
“No, are you jealous that Sven gives Cara massages?”
“Why the fuck would I be jealous of that? He’s taking his life into his own hands, but that’s his problem, not mine.”
I laughed. “Come on, bro. We both know she’s not actually evil.”
“No, she is actually evil.”
The kitten stretched out a paw, so I reached up to make sure she didn’t tumble off my shoulder. “I think she’s just misunderstood.”
He snort-laughed.
I knew I was risking life and limb by poking at him about this, but I couldn’t resist. Besides, I had a broken leg and I was holding a kitten. There was no way he’d tackle me right now.
“Okay, but real talk, you’d totally bang her.”
“Fuck no, I wouldn’t.”
“Wait, have you already?”
“No.”
I actually believed him, but this was too much fun. “Yes you have. That’s why you guys hate each other so much. You fucked once and got under each other’s skin.”
“No we fucking did not.”
“You sure about that? You hate her a lot for a guy who hasn’t been in her pants.”
“What the fuck does that have to do with anything?” His face reddened. “I can’t stand her because the very sight of her pisses me off, not because I fucked her once.”
“Okay, sure.”
“It’s true.”
“Yeah, I believe you.”
His nostrils flared and if I hadn’t been holding the kitten and had a broken leg, he would have wrestled me to the ground by now for sure. “Fuck off, Gav.”
“So touchy. You know, you could do a lot worse than Cara.”
“No, she’s the literal worst.” He stood abruptly, pushing his chair back. “I need a shower.”
“If Sven does a good job, do you want his number? You seem stressed, I bet a massage would be good for you.”
“Shut the fuck up.”
I snickered as he walked down the hall toward the bathroom.
Rushing In: A Small Town Family Romance Page 10