by Eric Vall
“Okay, you took the bad cop thing a little farther than I expected,” I informed the woman. “I’m not sure using our allies for target practice will accomplish what we’re going for.”
“Well, you took the good cop thing too far,” the princess countered. “How are we supposed to power play them if you baby them and play nice?”
“I wasn’t nice, I was calm,” I corrected, “and like I said, being approachable is part of being the good cop.”
“And you also said the bad cop gets to be a hard ass.”
“Yes, but he’s still a good guy,” I explained again. “Do good guys aim loaded rifles at their allies, or do they just threaten them for the greater good?”
Cayla pursed her lips. “I got rid of them, didn’t I?”
“We’re not trying to get rid of them,” I reminded her. “We’re trying to get them to cooperate with each other in less than a day without losing our minds.”
“Right,” the princess said with a slow nod. “So, when you lied through your teeth about the ogres trying to have a friendly chat, you really believed that would get the elf to cooperate with the guy who tried to eat his arm?”
“Fair point,” I muttered. “I think we both missed the mark on this one, but there’s a middle ground somewhere. I know it’s there. We just need to find it.”
“True, this was only our first try.”
“Next time, let’s work more like a team and avoid starting a countdown since that made it hard to finish the conversation at all,” I suggested.
“We could try that,” the princess agreed. “Should I not bother giving them a count, and just fire at will?”
“What? No,” I clarified, but then Aurora began banging on the door, and when I opened it, the half-elf scanned the entryway with concern.
“Why did you lock the door, and why are there elves arguing on the other side of our moat?” Aurora asked.
“We had a minor misunderstanding, but it’ll be fine,” I replied. “Is Deli okay?”
“Yeah, she’s having trouble getting her jets to bend around objects,” Aurora told me. “She didn’t seem as upset as Alfred implied, but the dwarves are looking more hostile in town. They’re even glaring at the mages now, and I can’t find Kurna anywhere.”
“I’ll find him,” I sighed as I headed for my shop.
“Alright, but did you finish your automatons yet?” Aurora asked as she trotted after me. “Because if you did, maybe you have a few minutes to fuck me against the--”
“Not yet,” I cut in as I dropped onto my stool, and I started on the rifle magazines again before she could say anything else to turn me on. “I want to get the automatons’ ammunition loaded and mounted in the next ten minutes, and once I transfer them outside, I’m gonna make a spare AR-15 before I start on the ammo for the troops.”
“Oh, I spoke with Urn about that when I was looking for Kurna,” the half-elf added. “He said if you can get five hundred of the fireball and lightning magazines made, then we should be set with the crates we still have on the battlements.”
“I can do that,” I said as I began filing cartridges away ten at a time. “Did Urn mention anything about promotions? He said he’d check on the progress the mages are making.”
“He recommended only ten for promotion, but he isn’t certain they’ll perform as adequately as you’d prefer with their magery,” Aurora replied. “I think it would be best to hold off.”
“I agree,” I muttered, “but I don’t love the idea. I still haven’t heard from Nulena about the nobles’ armies, and if they fall short of two hundred, we might be pushing our luck on this.”
“Why do you say that?” Cayla asked as she sat on the table beside my stacks of magazines. “I thought we were doing well with our numbers so far.”
“We are,” I allowed, “but my concern is about the portals I located last night. I was able to--”
I trailed off as Alfred arrived in the doorway, and I was about to assure him I was keeping my hands off the princess when I realized he had a few letters in his hands.
“From your generals in the south, sir,” the butler said in a grave tone, and I shot up to retrieve the slips of parchment.
“Son of a bitch,” I muttered as I scanned General Kin’s report, and Aurora grabbed the others to do the same while Alfred stood quietly against the wall. “Kin’s had four attacks in Limont since sundown yesterday.”
“Four?” Cayla gasped.
“Same goes for the Defenders in both Yerich and Tellish,” Aurora reported, and she looked at me with an anxious frown. “Mason, we may have to send more Defenders to the south. There haven’t been any casualties amongst our troops, but the citizens are getting caught in the crosshairs.”
I nodded as my stomach dropped. “If he keeps this up, the Defenders will start to falter real soon.”
“We could lose them by the dozens within the week,” Aurora realized.
“I can’t spare any of the northern troops, though,” I admitted. “They’re the only ones who can use the 1911s, and they have the most experience against the Master’s forces. If I send them all to the south, we’ll just be playing into his hand. Then we’ll never fend off the attacks at the tunnels.”
“Well, the citizens are in our hands, so what do you want to do?” the half-elf asked, but I didn’t have an answer, and I flipped through the three letters again while I considered our losses so far.
“We have to keep our troops up here,” I finally decided. “Kin says the vassal’s army has been assisting their efforts, which means the same could be true of the other nobles’ armies.”
“But if that’s the case, we can’t risk using them for the attacks at the tunnels,” Cayla pointed out. “They’re already needed elsewhere.”
“So, we need to keep our Defenders,” I decided. “I don’t like the idea of leaving our troops without backup in the south, but if the Master just increased his attacks, then he has to be only days away from unleashing his army. That means we could end it all before the losses become too great.”
“What if he’s not only days away?” Aurora asked as Deya and Shoshanne came into the atrium, and the two women quietly joined Cayla near the table as they listened with alarm.
“If he drags this out for another week, hundreds could die or be branded,” Cayla added.
“Unfortunately, I think that’s a risk we have to take,” I told the others. “If he’s trying for any tactical advantage, then I’d wager he won’t wait long. Nowhere near a week. The Defenders in the south are still cutting through his numbers, and he’d be a fool to waste soldiers on a no-win scenario like that. He’s probably hoping we panic and ship out more of our Defenders. We have to do the opposite.”
“Then I think we should leave the nobles’ armies where they are for the citizens’ safety,” Aurora said.
I nodded. “Me, too. It fucks us over a bit, but we’ll just have to scrape by. I still have to see what Temin tells Nulena, but at least we have Cayla’s army to take the Illarian tunnels.”
“Do you know your numbers?” Aurora asked as she turned to the princess.
“Two hundred men with months of experience with their revolvers,” Cayla answered. “Captain Huntley tells me they’re sharp shooters, but they’re lacking experience against the Master’s soldiers. That’s my main concern. Their loading time will be longer than we need, they won’t be as quick on their feet as they should be, and if anything as large as an ogre comes through the tunnel, they’ll need multiple hits to take down one attacker. So, they’ll also be burning through their ammunition quickly.”
“Davit said to expect them at the Serin station around eleven thirty, though,” I added. “That’ll give you a chance to assess their abilities firsthand. Your soldiers may be more adequate than you expect.”
“Based on the map you showed us, the Illarian tunnel should only be a thirty-minute ride from Serin,” Cayla said with a nod. “That gives me enough time to work on preparing them as best I can.”
“Maybe I can carve out some time to help you,” I mused.
“We’ll do it for you,” Shoshanne cut in, and Deya quickly agreed. “All of us know what you’ll be needing from her soldiers, and between the four of us, it’ll be easier to assess all two hundred and be sure they know what to expect.”
“If you ladies could get Cayla’s army into shape, we might be able to pull this off,” I said as I considered the options. “The Illarian tunnel is my biggest concern, because even though we’re already guaranteed two hundred soldiers there, none of them have magical abilities or 1911s, so they’ll be at the greatest risk against the possessed beings. We’re still gonna be short on numbers across the board, though. I’ll just have to see if I can figure something out by then.”
“How many Boms can you send to help us down there?” Cayla asked.
“I’ve been thinking about that,” I said as I headed back to the table to continue working on magazines. “I’m going to keep Big Red and Big Guy at their posts in Serin and Falmount, and I’ll be sending Boms One and Two out with us. That means we have ten sentries, with eight of them carrying AR-15s, and two carrying runed 1911s.”
“Why not rune the AR-15s as well?” Shoshanne asked.
“Because I haven’t tried to rune any of the rifles’ magazines yet, and I don’t have time to do multiple trial runs to ensure the lightning elements won’t cause any issues like we had the first time we tested the AR-15.”
My women grimaced at the memory of my hand being blasted open, and they all nodded in agreement.
“They’ll still be extremely effective, though,” I assured them as I slid another completed stack of magazines aside. “All my automatons have aim on par with Cayla, but Boms One and Two will be packing less ammunition, so I’ll send each of them to a tunnel in Orebane. With the amount of ogres we’ll have up there, it shouldn’t be an issue. That leaves two sentries for each of the remaining tunnels.”
“How many rounds are they carrying?” Aurora asked as she eyed the four metal helms looming above her.
“Six hundred,” I said with a grin.
“Gods, I love you,” the princess moaned as her eyes fluttered shut.
“I love you, too,” I chuckled.
“That alone could make up for our lack of numbers,” Shoshanne mused. “If their aim strikes true with every shot, they could potentially take down all the creatures that come through the tunnels without any help from us.”
“No, I’m pretty sure that won’t be the case,” I muttered, and my women all looked over as Alfred furrowed his brow from his spot near the wall. “When I went to locate the portals, I found four at each tunnel, and they’re all larger than the ones we’ve come across so far. If you consider the amount of soldiers the Master’s been able to send through the portals already, and factor in the proximity issue he’s solved by using the tunnels, then apply the logic of a larger elemental engraving allowing for more beings to be transported… ”
“Gods,” Aurora whimpered. “Mason… are you saying he could send thousands through just one of these portals?”
I didn’t want to answer since my women looked terrified by the idea, but I knew it wouldn’t change anything to tiptoe around the facts.
“There’s a very good chance, yeah,” I admitted. “Granted, we don’t know how many minions he’s gathered for himself, but on our side, we’ll be under three hundred soldiers per tunnel.”
The air in the atrium felt heavier as we all exchanged nervous glances, and none of my women said a word while the truth of what we were walking into really sank in. Alfred folded his hands and looked down with a solemn frown, and even Stan and Solana didn’t move a muscle as they watched me from their scrap pile.
“See why I need to keep our Defenders?” I muttered after a couple minutes of weighted silence passed.
“Mason, these aren’t good odds,” Aurora said flat out. “Are you sure we can risk this?”
“No,” I admitted, “but if we hang back and let the Master use his tunnels without trying to counter his efforts, then we’ll lose this war. His soldiers will disperse across every region, they’ll multiply as they brand their victims, and we’ll have no opportunity to take them out at the scale we might be able to accomplish right now.”
“Mason’s right,” Cayla agreed. “It’s high-risk, high-reward. We have to try.”
I nodded. “It isn’t hopeless, though. Our mages are ready, our weapons are superior, and by combining our armies, we have a lot working in our favor.”
My women didn’t respond, and I hated to see them all looking less confident than I’d ever seen them about an upcoming battle, but I’d rather have them completely aware of what was at stake than blindly strolling into the fray.
Still, my own confidence was wavering now that I stopped running around long enough to let the situation crash down on me, and I stared at the magazines on the table while I wondered if I was about to get all my allies killed along with every woman I loved and our unborn children.
The worst part, though, was knowing I had no choice but to move forward with the plan. Not only was it my job to act in the best interest of Illaria, this was what Nemris sent me here to do, and if I didn’t give it everything I had now, I would fail before I ever even tried to destroy the Master in earnest.
Then Alfred cleared his throat. “Can I get you anything, sir?”
“Do you have an extra army or two tucked anywhere?” I snorted.
“No, sir, but perhaps an early lunch,” the butler suggested.
I chuckled as I rifled my hair. “I could really go for like… five burgers.”
“Five what?” Cayla asked as she arched an eyebrow, and my heart cracked open at the thought of the many double cheeseburgers that got me through both puberty and college back on earth.
Sure, a war was detrimentally worse than either of those, but if there was one thing I was certain of, it was that I could sustain myself on just about anything with the right mindset.
And at the moment, I knew without a doubt there was only one food that could rally me for the situation I found myself in.
“Alfred, I need you,” I sighed as I pulled a slip of parchment over. “If anyone can do this, it’s you.”
Alfred pulled out his spectacles as he joined me at the table, and while he watched me work from over my shoulder, I drew the most beautiful burger I could. I even left little notes all over the page about the many toppings he could choose from, and then I detailed the importance of the meat to bun ratio, the thickness of the patties if a double burger is being attempted, and a description of ketchup’s flavor in case he’d never heard of such a thing before.
Then I sat back and salivated at the thought of a juicy, well balanced cheeseburger before I handed the paper to the butler.
“This is called a burger,” I told the man. “If you can achieve something resembling this burger, then I can probably accept the possibility of death and failure without shutting down.”
“You’re not serious,” Aurora snorted.
“Never underestimate the power of a decent burger,” I replied.
“Is this a food of the gods?” Deya asked as she came over to study the sketch.
“Yes,” I said with a sage nod. “It is.”
“I wonder if I can eat it without throwing up,” the beautiful elf mused as she sent me a sweet smile.
“Only one way to find out, my lady,” Alfred decided as he removed his spectacles. “Baron Flynt, I will not rest until I have succeeded in this endeavor. Will you be able to resist your women while I work?”
My women bit their lips nervously, and I was about to admit I couldn’t make any promises, but then the clanging of bells interrupted me, and I furrowed my brow as I glanced at my women.
“Were we expecting any more allies in Falmount?” I checked.
“I don’t think so,” Aurora muttered.
Then we all jumped up, and I slid a stack of magazines across the table to Cayla while my other
women grabbed their weapons from my racks. The five of us were out the door in seconds flat with our pistols at the ready, but all of us slowed to a confused walk before we even reached the bridge.
“Wait, what’s going on?” I mumbled as I scanned the lanes. “Are those our ogres?”
“Yeah, there’s Grot,” Cayla pointed out.
I looked in the direction she gestured to find Grot throwing two warriors from House Quyn through a window, and as dwarves drew their swords against ogres and elves alike, I realized my allies were battling each other.
“Mason, this is a problem,” Shoshanne informed me as she grabbed my arm, and she pointed to a chupacabra who was just about to bite the arm off a dwarf before one of our mages shot him in the back of the skull with a fireball bullet.
“Shit,” I growled as I sent my Terra powers through the ground, and sure enough, there was a whole fleet of possessed creatures spilling over the tracks into Falmount.
My allies were just too busy attacking each other to notice.
Chapter 13
I bolted over the bridge while I tried to get everyone to refocus, but it didn’t matter how much I hollered or pulled them off each other. Even after I silenced the bells, everyone was still too wound up to take any notice, and while I shot fireball bullets into a swarm of tar-spewing spiders, I clambered up onto a boulder at the edge of the lane.
“If you assholes start killing each other, I’ll shoot every one of you!” I bellowed at my allies, but Cayla dragged me down from the boulder before I could continue.
“Mason, that’s my line!” the princess scoffed. “You’re the good cop, remember?”
“I know,” I sighed, but then a chupacabra slammed into me and sent me flying into the air, and all my women gasped with fury.
That poor chupacabra was mutilated in four different ways by the time I got back to my feet, and I hauled Deya off the corpse with her bloody dagger still swinging.
“Forget these imbeciles,” the beautiful elf panted in my arms. “I will kill all your enemies for you, Mason Flynt! I’ll tear the arteries from their throats and stomp on their hideous faces to avenge you!”