Longing For His kiss

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Longing For His kiss Page 19

by Sherri Hayes


  Of course, they were a good fit in other ways as well. She was easy to talk to once she got past her shyness. And because she’d been an Army wife for so long there were things she understood about him many civilians didn’t. She was a great companion as well as a lovely sub.

  The issue was to get her to see that. Sometime Grace concentrated so much on where she was lacking that she missed all the things she was good at.

  He’d spent a good portion of his day catching up on some reading. There were years’ worth of medical journals full of new technology he needed to brush up on. In the Army everything was about triage—patch ’em up and send ’em on. From time to time he would have the opportunity to sit down and go over the latest and greatest in the world of medicine, but for the most part if it didn’t have to do with how to stop someone from bleeding out, removing shrapnel from wounds, or amputation, he skimmed over it.

  Things were different now. When he’d finished medical school, Alexander had every intention of serving his six years and then starting his own practice, but he hadn’t been able to abandon his comrades. That, and by the time his six years were up, his parents had both passed away. There was nothing calling him back home. At least in the Army he had a place.

  It was the hardest part of the transition—the being alone. There wasn’t much alone time in the Army, especially when you were deployed. If you wanted to be alone, you pretty much had to lock yourself in one of the latrines.

  When he’d woken up in the VA hospital it was late at night. One of the first things he noticed was how quiet it was. Oh, there were noises, lots of little beeps and clicks, but nothing compared to what he’d been used to. It had frightened him at first, the lack of noise, until he’d realized he was in a hospital and he was stateside.

  The microwave dinged and he removed his bowl of soup, carrying it into the living room where he could continue his reading. Before he knew it, the sun had gone down and it was time to get ready for bed.

  He removed his clothes and tossed them into the basket he kept beside the door in his bedroom. Grace had never been to his place, a problem he thought maybe he should solve in the not too distant future. He wanted her to warm to the idea of them being a couple, and maybe being in his space would help with that. It wasn’t much, but for now it was home.

  His bathroom wasn’t as nice as hers. It was pretty basic. But considering he used to share a shower with a hundred or so guys, it could have been a pipe sticking out of the wall for all he cared.

  After washing up and taking care of business, Alexander made his way over to his bed. He’d spent the last two nights with Grace, her warm body pressed against him. His bed felt cold in comparison and he questioned his wisdom to stay there tonight instead of with her.

  He hadn’t wanted to crowd her, though. That and he needed a little perspective as well. He was still dealing with the guilt of pursuing his best friend’s widow even though he knew that in some ways they were doing it with Kurt’s blessing. Or at least that’s what Alexander was telling himself. Kurt wanted Grace to be taken care of and he could do that. He would do that if she would let him.

  Rolling onto his side, he ran a hand over the cool sheets and imagined her lying there beside him. He knew she was okay with their D/s relationship. She’d embraced that part. It was the rest that had her wavering and he wasn’t sure exactly what it was that kept her holding back. She said it was because she didn’t know if she could give him what he needed, but that didn’t make sense to him. Not really. He didn’t know how to help her get past it. All he could do was hope and pray that time would get her to see they could be good together, and not only as Dom and sub.

  The next morning dawned way too soon. He stretched before lowering himself to the floor to do his morning sit-ups. Before his injury he was able to do one hundred easy, but lying in a bed for months had destroyed that.

  He’d had to work his way from doing tiny crunches in his hospital bed to finally being able to do sit-ups again. After seven months, he could manage fifty before his muscles began to protest. Still, it was good to feel his strength returning, even if he had little hope of ever recovering the full function of his leg again.

  Sweat rolled off him as he made his way to the shower. He placed his hands against the wall, leaning forward, letting the water trail down his back. It felt good, but not as good as Grace’s hands.

  Alexander tipped his head back, letting the water hit his face. He couldn’t stop thinking about her. Even the simplest things brought her to his mind.

  His cock began to harden, and he knew he needed to change the direction of his thoughts. Alexander reached for the soap and began to lather his body, ignoring the ache in his groin. He would see her tonight when he dropped off the lube and maybe she could relieve his growing problem.

  As he was getting dressed for work, his gaze drifted back to the bed, then to his closet. Before he could overthink it, Alexander stuffed a change of clothes in a black bag, and went to find some breakfast. He knew it probably wasn’t the best idea for him to stay overnight during the week, given they both had to work, but last night he had missed having her beside him. It was insane considering he’d slept alone his entire life with very few exceptions, but there it was and he wasn’t going to fight it.

  His day went by faster than he expected. He’d been sure it would drag since he was anxious to see Grace again, but the two meetings he’d had to attend had helped. There hadn’t been time to do much of anything beyond answer question after question regarding various medical procedures, their uses, and their effectiveness. It was a good thing he’d been reading up on all the latest techniques and trials.

  By the time he stopped by the grocery store to pick up some coconut oil and the adult store for a few other things, he was desperate for some stress relief. Alexander pulled up outside Grace’s house, grabbed his black bag, his recent purchases, and his cane. He walked up the stairs to her front porch and rang the doorbell.

  Several minutes passed and no one answered.

  He’d told her he would be stopping by. Had something come up and she’d forgotten to call him?

  Alexander tried again.

  Before he was able to remove his finger, the door swung open to a very harried looking Grace. “Alexander.”

  “Grace? Is something wrong?”

  “No. No. I—”

  “Grace, who is it?” The sound of a woman’s voice floated in from the other room.

  “Umm.”

  “If you need me to tell them to go away—” The woman appeared behind Grace. She was a little taller with a few more curves, but there was no mistaking these two had to be related.

  Grace met his gaze. She looked almost apologetic. Then she half turned to her sister. “Gabby, this is Alexander. Alexander, this is my sister, Gabby.”

  Gabby stepped forward, thrusting her hand out for him to take. “It’s good to finally meet you, Alexander.”

  He took her hand and gave it a firm shake. Grace’s sister was a lot more outgoing than Grace, that was for sure. “Very nice to meet you, Gabby. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

  “Well, that makes one of us.” She dropped her hand and backed farther into the house. “Are you going to invite him in? Or are you going to make him stand out in the cold?”

  Grace mouthed the word ‘sorry’, and opened the door more to allow him to step inside. He wanted to say more, to tell Grace it was all right, but Gabby was right there, not taking her gaze off him. He’d have to wait until later. When they were alone. For the time being, he tried to let her know as best he could that it was fine. He was going to have to meet her family sooner or later.

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  Chapter 21

  Grace waited for Alexander to remove his coat and hung it up for him. Her hand was still on the hanger when she felt his hand on her lower back. He bent to place his bag on the floor inside the closet. It was only then she realized he’d been carrying three bags. One looked to be an
overnight bag. The other two were plastic—one of which looked like the kind they gave you at a novelty store. Given their conversation the night before, Grace had to assume somewhere in one of them was the lube he promised to pick up. She only hoped her sister hadn’t seen it.

  She met his gaze.

  He grinned and gave her back a gentle rub. “Relax.”

  The sound of something falling on the floor caught their attention and they all turned in the direction the sound came from. Without missing a beat, Gabby headed toward the noise. “Taylor, what are you doing that you’re not supposed to?”

  As soon as her sister was out of earshot, Grace faced Alexander. “I’m so sorry. I thought she’d be gone by the time you got here.”

  He turned her to face him and pressed his lips against her forehead. “It’s fine. I was going to meet her eventually.”

  This was true. Still, she hadn’t meant to spring it on him. Gabby could be a little . . . much.

  They made their way into the kitchen, not wanting Gabby to come looking for them. When they walked in, her sister was on the floor cleaning up the yogurt Taylor had managed to drop. It had gone everywhere. Gabby looked up. “Yogurt, anyone?”

  Alexander chuckled beside her. “No, thanks. I think I’ll pass.”

  Gabby shrugged. “Suit yourself.” She threw the paper towels she’d been using to clean up the mess into the trash, and went to the refrigerator to grab another yogurt. Within seconds, she’d removed the foil lid and placed the new container in front of Taylor along with a spoon. “Eat your yogurt. You can play with your toy after.”

  It was almost six o’clock, so Grace wasn’t surprised her niece was hungry. They’d had lunch hours ago.

  “So tell me about yourself,” Gabby said to Alexander as she took a seat beside her daughter, not seeming to be in any hurry to leave.

  Grace cringed at what she knew was coming, but there wasn’t much she could do other than kick her sister out, and she knew how well that would go.

  Alexander seemed unfazed. He pulled out a chair, offered it to Grace, and sat down beside her. “What is it you’d like to know?”

  Gabby wiped some yogurt from her daughter’s mouth. “How old are you? Where are you from? Are you planning to stay in St. Louis?”

  “I’m thirty-five. A lot of places. And yes.”

  Her sister leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms. “Define a lot of places.”

  Alexander placed his hand on Grace’s leg before responding. She hadn’t even realized she’d been bouncing it. “My father was an Army officer, so we moved around a lot.”

  “I see,” Gabby said. “Did you have a favorite?”

  “Probably Alaska. Although, I’m not sure I could take the winters anymore.” Grace had known he’d lived all over the place. He’d told her how hard it had been to make friends growing up.

  Her sister shifted gears. “Grace told us you’re a doctor.”

  It wasn’t exactly a question, but Alexander answered anyway. “Yes, that’s right.”

  “What kind of doctor?”

  “My specialty is in pediatric medicine,” he said.

  That surprised Grace. She wasn’t sure why. Doctors with all sorts of specialties went into the military for various reasons. It also struck her that she’d never thought to ask him. What a great girlfriend she was turning out to be.

  “So you like kids?” Her sister probed deeper. Grace thought about saying something, trying to change the subject, but didn’t figure it would do any good. Even if Gabby went with the flow and dropped her current line of questioning, she’d find a way to bring it up again—today, or heaven forbid at Thanksgiving.

  Alexander didn’t seem to mind her question. “I love kids. One of these days I’d like to have several of my own.” This was also news to Grace. In all their conversations, they’d never discussed children. But why would they have? It wasn’t as if they were a couple.

  But now they were. Sort of. The reality of what they were was still a bit fuzzy.

  Her sister’s eyes sparkled at Alexander’s assertion. “That’s good to know. Isn’t it, Grace?”

  Grace couldn’t believe her sister was doing this. “Yeah.”

  Alexander squeezed her leg, offering comfort. It was Grace who should be comforting him. She couldn’t believe her sister.

  He tilted his head toward Taylor. “If I remember correctly, Grace told me your little one was three, correct?”

  This seemed to please her sister. “Yes. She’ll be four in March.” Her sister ran a hand over the top of Taylor’s head. “She’s growing up so fast.”

  “They do that,” he said.

  Taylor was almost finished with her yogurt, so Grace thought this was as good a time as any to try and get her sister out the door. “Did you need me to help you take any of Taylor’s things out to the car?”

  “Trying to get rid of me?”

  “I—”

  Her sister waved her hand in front of her face in a dismissive gesture and stood. “No, it’s fine. I’ll get out of your hair. I’m sure you want to spend some quality time with your man.” She scooped her daughter up and walked to the sink to wipe her face and hands before addressing Alexander. “It was nice to finally meet you.”

  “Likewise.”

  “Walk me to my car?” Gabby asked Grace.

  Grace nodded, and then to Alexander she said, “I’ll be right back.”

  Gabby didn’t say much on their way outside. She waited until Taylor was secured into her booster seat before drawing Grace in for a hug. “I like him.”

  “Thanks.” What else was she supposed to say?

  Her sister looked her in the eye, her face serious. “I know this last year has been hard, but you seem to have found a good man. Don’t push him away because you feel some sort of obligation to Kurt. He’s not coming back. And you’ve got a living, breathing”—she grinned—“hunk of a man in there who seems to adore you. Don’t mess it up.”

  Grace’s throat constricted as a flood of emotions washed over her. She couldn’t speak even if she wanted to.

  Gabby gave her another hug and left her standing on the sidewalk as she got in her car and drove away. Her sister’s words were fresh in her mind. Don’t mess it up. Grace looked back to the house knowing Alexander was inside. He wanted them to be a real couple. At least she was fairly sure he did.

  Could she do it? Could she let go of her doubts and just let things happen naturally, as he’d suggested?

  A cool breeze came from the north and she pulled her coat tighter around her as she headed back inside. She didn’t know if she could be what Alexander needed, but she knew one thing: she was going to try. Gabby was right—Alexander was a good man, and for good or bad she wasn’t willing to let him go.

  ***

  Alexander made his way into the living room when he heard the door open. From what Grace had shared with him about her sister, he’d known Gabby was direct and she hadn’t disappointed. Gabby’s line of questioning had made Grace uncomfortable, but it hadn’t bothered him. She had a right to know about the man who was dating her sister.

  He’d been reluctant to talk about the future when it came to him and Grace, but it wasn’t as if he was hiding it either. Alexander just didn’t think it was something Grace was ready for. She seemed content to live in the moment for now and he was okay with that. He could wait.

  Grace stopped when she saw him standing there. It was as if she didn’t know what she should do or say. He had to wonder what her sister had told her because he had no doubt, given what little he knew of Gabby, that she would have given her opinion, good or bad.

  He crossed to where she was standing a few feet from the door. She still had her coat on, so he reached for the zipper and helped her remove it.

  “Thanks,” she muttered as he hung her coat up for her.

  “Do you want to talk about it?”

  Grace took a step closer to him and placed her hands palm down on his chest. It was a bold move for
her. “I didn’t mean to ambush you.”

  Placing his hands on her hips, he pulled her against him. “I know you didn’t.”

  “She doesn’t have a filter sometimes.” Grace gazed up at him through her lashes. It was such a submissive look.

  “I didn’t mind her questions.” He wanted to ease her mind. “She was feeling me out to see if we’re a good match.”

  Her jaw flexed as if she was going to say something then thought better of it.

  He brushed his thumb against the side of her face. “What is it?”

  She averted her gaze, staring at his chest. “She told me not to mess it up.”

  Alexander couldn’t help but chuckle, which brought Grace’s head up. She was surprised by his reaction. “How exactly does she think you’ll mess it up?”

  “By pushing you away.” It sounded as if she were admitting to some heinous crime.

  He brought her closer, letting his lips linger an inch away from hers. “Is that what you want? For me to go away?”

  The muscles in her throat moved beneath his hand as she swallowed. “No.”

  “Good.” He smiled and figured this was as good a time as any to bring up their sleeping arrangements for the night. “I brought a change of clothes with me.”

  She had no problem following the shift in conversation. “You’re spending the night?”

  “If that’s okay with you.”

  Grace licked her lips, drawing his attention back to her mouth. “I’d like that.”

  He hummed as he closed the distance between them. As much as he wished otherwise, Alexander tempered his kiss and kept it fairly chaste. “Have you eaten dinner yet?”

  “No. Not yet.”

  “Me either.” He kissed her again.

  “I could make something,” she suggested.

  Alexander didn’t release her. “Or we could just order in.”

 

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