I couldn’t bear another loss. In the café, I buy coffee from the machine and settle down in front of the TV to watch the news. There are two other people in the café, but none of them are watching the screen.
The news of the fire fills the screen. A fireman explains that the fire started in one of the top apartments. Looking at the soot-covered building, it hits me afresh that Cora and the other residents were lucky to get out alive. He goes on to say that it will be months or even longer before the building is fit to be inhabited again.
It saddens me to think of Cora’s employees who will be affected by the temporary loss of employment.
Then he grows solemn as he explains there have been serious injuries and two of the firemen are in critical condition. I’m not an emotional person but anything to do with our soldiers, policemen, and firemen tugs at my heart.
These guys sacrifice so much for us that it breaks my heart when I hear they’ve been hurt and are fighting for their lives.
I drain my coffee, toss the plastic cup into the trash can, and return to Cora’s room.
“We’re so grateful, Thomas,” Cora’s mom says, coming to take my hands into hers. “I know she’ll be comfortable with you.” She winks. “Maybe even you two might decide that marriage is not so outdated after all.”
“Mom!”
She shrugs. “I’m just saying that anything can happen when two people are living together.”
“I’m sure it won’t be for more than a few weeks,” Cora says.
I move close to her bed while debating whether to tell her the real magnitude of the damage. I decide it’s better that it comes from me rather than from the media.
“I’m afraid it’s going to be a lot longer than that,” I tell her gently. “I was watching the news in the café. They are saying months.”
A stricken look comes over Cora’s features. I can’t guess what she’s thinking, but whatever it is, it’s definitely not good.
“It’s okay,” I tell her.
“What about my gym?” Her eyes fill up.
“Come on, Cora, what matters is that everyone’s fine. Right, Thomas?” Adeline says.
“Yes, of course.”
Cora looks so sad that I can’t tell her about the two policemen fighting for their lives in this very hospital. She’s had enough bad news for one day. We all stay until everyone is kicked out by the nurse. I stay behind for a few minutes after everyone goes, one of the perks of being a doctor.
“Hey.” I move to the head of the bed and cup Cora’s face. “Don’t look so sad. It could have been a lot worse. The structure of the building is sound, and in no time, they’ll finish with the repairs.”
She sniffs. “Please don’t think I’m ungrateful because I am. It’s just that I feel as if a rug has been pulled from under my feet. In the space of one night, I’ve got no home and no business.”
My chest squeezes at the sadness in her voice. My caveman instincts emerge, and all I want is to take her home with me and take care of her. I swallow them down, knowing that it’s not what Cora needs.
She’s one of the most independent women I know, and her feelings of loss are very understandable. She’s put her sweat and blood into her business, and now it’s threatened. It doesn’t help that she lives in the same building and has lost a business and a home.
“It doesn’t seem like it now, but I promise everything is going to be okay,” I tell her.
She stares at me. “I have to look for an apartment. I can’t be in your space for three months.”
“Hush. Of course, you can. Are you forgetting how big my house is? If you like, we can each have a floor to ourselves. Please don’t give it another thought. Promise?”
She manages a smile. “Okay. Thanks so much, Thomas. As you can imagine, living with my mother or Adeline would have been a real trial in patience, which I’d have failed miserably.”
I laugh, glad that her sense of humor is returning.
By the time I’m leaving, she looks settled and sleepy. I kiss her forehead and tuck her in. I pause at the door, and she flashes me a very tired smile. I’m sure that by the time I close the door, she’s completely asleep.
It’s five o’clock in the morning when I get back home, and I’m too wound up to sleep. I embark on a cleaning exercise. I vacuum the whole house, although it’s fairly clean as I have hired a cleaning company that comes in once a week.
Upstairs, I’m not sure which room to get ready for Cora. I would love to have her in my bedroom and share a bed with her every night. I love waking up to her soft, warm body and making love to her at night. It’s so tempting, but I can’t be led by my libido. Cora has gone through hell in the last twenty-four hours, and the last thing she needs is a horny housemate.
I make a snap decision and enter the bedroom opposite mine, making the bed with fresh sheets and a comforter. The ensuite bathroom is clean, and there are clean towels and soap.
To my absolute shame, I start to visualize Cora in the shower cubicle, and I immediately grow hard.
Disgusted with myself, I go to my room and undress. Cora and I agreed that she would text me as soon as she’s discharged. I’m sure that it’s going to be a few hours from now. I slip into bed and try to empty my mind enough to catch a few hours of sleep.
Chapter 29
Cora
I feel like I’ve been in hospital for a week. In reality, it’s been two nights and two long days. Dr. Phillips insisted that I stay another day just to be sure that everything is okay with the baby.
I’ve always thought of myself as a strong person, but I don’t feel very strong right now. Without my home and business, I’m stripped of my identity. I can’t believe at my age and situation that I’m homeless.
One of my many fantasies regarding Thomas was to move into his spacious house. Well, they say that you should be careful what you wish for. This is not the way I wanted it. I feel like a charity case, and it’s a horrible way to feel. I wanted Thomas to ask me to live with him but not out of pity or a misplaced sense of duty. I want to curl up in a corner and cry. I’ve tried to put on a brave face in front of everyone, including Thomas. The only person who has an idea of how tough this is for me is Riley.
She and Leo came by earlier to visit. Leo and I had an emotional reunion, and I was glad to get the chance to say thank you. He risked his life by entering a burning building to save mine.
I’m sad too because two of his colleagues were badly injured in the fire and are fighting for their lives. I’ve always been super grateful for the sacrifices that firefighters make, but when you come up close and personal with them, the magnitude of what they do really hits you.
I’m packed and ready to go when Thomas walks in to take me home. He laughs when he sees me perched on the edge of the bed.
“Someone is eager to leave,” he says and bends to kiss my cheek.
“I can’t tell you how much I’m looking forward to a change of scenery. These four walls are driving me crazy.”
Fifteen minutes later, I’m being wheeled out of the hospital in a wheelchair, and then Thomas and I are on the way home. It’s eleven in the morning, and the sun is warm and perfect.
I roll down the window and let my head fall back on the car seat. The wind on my face and the smell of clean fresh air feels like a new life for me. The first day in the hospital, I couldn’t get rid of the smell of smoke and soot. It was everywhere, even after showering and changing clothes.
It feels so good to smell like myself again and to inhale nature smells.
“I bet you feel like you’ve been in hospital for years,” Thomas says.
I laugh. “How did you know?”
“I’ve been hospitalized once about ten years ago. My appendix burst, and the timing was terrible as I’d just started my new job,” Thomas says.
I make all the appropriate noises as he regales me with his experience of being hospitalized. I look at him with the realization of how little I know him. I’ve thought this before, bu
t this time it’s more poignant because we’re going to be living together. Panic fills my chest and then rises in my throat.
My heart beats wildly. What had I been thinking agreeing to agree to live with Thomas? I know he values his space and privacy. I know what any hint at intimacy does to him. If the thought of a baby freaked him out, what about me living in his house?
I take quiet, deep breaths. I’m driving myself crazy, and I deliberately empty my mind. An idea pops into my mind. “Hey, do you mind if we pass by my apartment building?”
“Are you sure you want to?” Thomas says.
“I’m sure.”
All my employees had stopped in at the hospital, and even though none of them voiced it, I could see the worry in their eyes. We’ve all suddenly found ourselves out of jobs, and it’s frightening.
“Just remember that it looks worse than it really is,” Thomas says.
As we get closer, I can see how damaged the building is, but when we stop in front of it, I want to break down into tears. The whole exterior is black, and some of the windows are broken. The smell of smoke wafts up my nose, and I’m not sure if it’s real or imagined. Emotion grabs me by the throat as the memories of that night come over me. I remember crawling in my dark, smoke-filled apartment, trying to find my way to the front door.
I’m so lucky to be alive. I can’t imagine the kind of courage that firemen have to voluntarily enter burning buildings.
“Ready to leave?” Thomas asks me softly.
My heart is heavy. “Yeah.”
I’m finding it hard to believe what Thomas said about the renovations taking three months. The damage looks terrible.
We reach his house, and when he turns off the engine, I inhale deeply. “It’s not too late to change your mind. I can always go to Riley’s.”
Thomas stares at me without speaking. His eyes take on a darker shade, and I feel as if he can read all my thoughts. I feel naked and exposed. I’m the first to look away.
“It’s not going to be for long, Cora. Relax and just concentrate on getting better. This is just me being there for a friend and the mother of my child, okay?”
I swallow hard. “Okay.”
In the past, it’s always been exciting coming to Thomas’s house, but it’s different coming as a charity case. He walks around and opens the door for me.
“I’m okay,” I tell him when he attempts to take my hand to help me out. Physically, my body is okay, but emotionally, I don’t feel like myself. I feel lost, like a piece of wood cast adrift at sea.
I follow Thomas to the front door and wait while he fishes his key out and unlocks the door. A delicious smell hits me as soon as I enter, and my stomach rumbles with hunger. It’s a welcome sound. My appetite has been non-existent since the night of the fire. I’ve been forcing myself to eat, and when I’m unable, guilt follows, and I imagine my baby hungry in my belly.
I’m on a roller coaster of emotions, and I hate it.
“I got someone to come and cook us a meal,” Thomas explains. “Do you want to eat first?”
“Yeah. Sure. Thanks. You didn’t have to go to so much trouble. A sandwich would have been fine.”
“I wanted to do something special to celebrate you leaving the hospital.”
I smile. “Thanks.”
In the kitchen, Thomas opens the oven and pulls out a dish. He carries the food to the table while I set it up.
“Hey, sit down; you need a rest,” he says.
“I’m okay, I promise. Laying down on that bed has been driving me crazy.” It feels so good to do something, even if it’s as simple as setting the table. Everything is done for you at the hospital. While it’s wonderful when you’re sick, but when you’re well as I was, it’s a nightmare.
Thomas joins me at the kitchen table, and we spoon the food onto our plates. Mashed potatoes, meatloaf, and steamed vegetables.
“Absolutely delicious,” I tell Thomas after I swallow my first mouthful.
“They do a good job,” he says and tells me about the company that cleans for him and also provides other services like cooking if you like.
I clear everything on my plate and even get seconds. Hospital food is bland, although food was the last thing on my mind.
After lunch, Thomas insists that he’ll do the dishes and takes me upstairs. To be honest, my eyes are drooping, and I’m sure it’s just past noon.
Thomas stops in the upstairs hallway. “I put you in this room, opposite mine.”
Disappointment floods me. I had looked forward to spending the night wrapped up in his arms. He opens the door, and I follow him in. It’s a beautiful, spacious room, and the window looks out to the fenced-in backyard and beyond that, the woods.
I’m teary, and I keep my face hidden by looking out the window.
“Your stuff is in the closet,” Thomas says. “I’ll leave you to settle in. I’ll be downstairs if you need me.”
“Thanks for everything,” I tell him.
The door shuts silently behind him. It’s silly and childish to expect that Thomas and I would share a bedroom. It’s different when I spent passionate nights with him as I would be gone the following day.
This is different. We both need our space. I need to shake myself out of this funk, and I must stop thinking of everything wrong in my life. I inhale deeply and turn away from the window. A bath would be lovely. Hospital showers are not the same as a home bath.
The bathroom is just as large and luxurious as the master bedroom bath. No shower for me today. I fill the tub and pour in some scented bath soak that I find on the side of the tub. I undress and step into the water. The temperature is perfect and hot enough to make my muscles relax but not so hot as to scald.
I lie down in the tub and slide down until I’m completely submerged in the water. I come up for air seconds later and spend the next few minutes scrubbing my body.
By the time I get out of the shower, I’m literally fighting to keep my eyelids open. I drain the tub, clean it, and after drying myself, pad back into the bedroom. I should look for something to wear, but I’m too sleepy. I slip into the cool bedsheets naked and pull the comforter up to my chin.
As I drift off to sleep, it ceases to matter that I don’t have my own home. Right now, all I feel is grateful that my baby and I have a warm place to sleep.
Chapter 30
Thomas
I’m straining to read, and when I look up from my book and out the window, the sun has already dipped behind the clouds, leaving only hints of orange that it had been there.
I’m sure that Cora decided to nap, but it’s been at least four hours. I hate to wake her up, but she needs to eat and save some sleep for tonight. I close the curtains and turn on the lights.
Upstairs, I knock lightly on Cora’s door, and when there’s no response, I gently open it. Cora’s rosy musky scent hits me as I tiptoe to the bed to look in on her. She’s completely asleep with her mouth slightly parted and strands of hair stuck to her forehead.
She’s so beautiful, and she looks so peaceful. I can’t figure out what is going on in that beautiful head of hers. Especially since the fire happened. Take today for instance. When I told her which bedroom she would be using, a flash of disappointment went through her eyes, but it disappeared quickly. I expected gratitude for giving her space.
I let out a sigh, and unable to resist, caress her stray strands of hair back in place. I haven’t decided yet whether to wake her or not, but that resolves by itself when she begins to stir.
Her eyes pop open, and confusion darkens them before recognition dawns, and she gives me a smile that wipes all thought from my mind. She lifts her hand, drapes it around my neck, and then pulls me to her.
I draw in a sharp breath as her soft hot lips touch mine. My cock grows hard instantly as she draws me into the heat of her mouth. She moans into my mouth as we kiss.
Take it easy, I tell myself. It doesn’t work. I need more.
I slip into the bed next to her, and when
she moves closer, I feel her soft naked body next to mine. I groan and pull her closer. She melts into me, and I stroke her back and ass.
She climbs on top of me, and I reach up to cup her breasts and tease them. It’s been so long that it feels like I’m touching her for the first time. I rub my thumbs over her nipples, and she lets out a cry. Her nipples are super sensitive now, as it happens with pregnant women, and I’m loving seeing the effect my touch has on her.
Arousal juices seep out of her and wet my shorts. She rubs her pussy over my erection and moans loudly. I sit up and take a nipple in my mouth. Cora’s breathing becomes pants and whimpers.
“I want you inside me,” she says.
“I want to make you feel good,” I tell her and fall back on the bed.
With my help, she pulls down my shorts and boxer briefs, and my cock springs free. I raise myself off the bed, and she pulls my shorts off all the way. Wild sensations go through me as Cora grips my cock at the base and then begins to stroke it.
She guides my cock to her entrance, presses down on it, and inch by inch takes me in. I keep a firm hold on her hips as she takes my cock in completely. Her hair frames her face, and I reach out to tuck it behind her ears so that I can see her.
She pulls away from me until only the head of my cock is buried in her pussy, and with my help, she slams back down. A loud cry escapes her lips, and she braces her hands palms down on my chest.
We lock gazes, and the experience changes from passionate sex to something deeper. A meeting of two souls who fit together like parts of a puzzle.
Tears fall from Cora’s eyes and flow down her cheeks, and I instinctively know that they are tears of happiness. I rise to a peak and take her with me, moving her hips faster and faster. We explode simultaneously and orgasm together. Our faces contort, and her inner walls clench around my cock, holding it imprisoned.
She falls against my chest, and I hold her tight as if to protect her from all negative things.
Our breathing is fast, and it slowly gets back to normal.
I love you.
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