“You said the mind was a tricky thing!” Harper pushed to her feet, breathing hard. “That in leaving your past behind, you convinced everyone, including yourself, that you weren’t hiding anything at all.”
“That’s right. It’s true,” Violet said.
She threw her arms around Violet. Andre’s sweatshirt slipped off Harper’s shoulders, and he caught it.
“Whoa, what was that for?” Violet asked.
“For driving the truth home. I have to go!” Harper said, clutching her keys in her hand.
“Are you okay?” Andre asked.
“I will be!” she called over her shoulder as she ran toward her car.
Chapter Twenty-Four
GAVIN SAT ON the couch beside Beckett, trying not to lose his mind. After Harper left, he’d told his parents he was going after her, but his father had convinced him to give her the space she’d asked for. Gavin agreed to give her two hours. That was almost two hours ago, and every passing second felt like it added another nail in his coffin.
“I can’t sit here anymore. I’m going to find her.” Gavin grabbed his keys and pushed to his feet.
Beckett yanked him back down. “You heard what Dad said before they went to bed. You just turned Harper’s whole fucking world upside down. Give her space, man. Jesus, you’ll look desperate.”
Gavin glowered at him. “I am desperate, asshole. I love Harper. I’d take a fucking beating from Satan if it would take away the pain I’ve caused her. How am I ever going to win her back?”
“Gavin, you’re the best man I know. Harper’s smart and she loves you. She knows who you really are, just like Mom and Dad do.”
He wasn’t so sure. He’d had a long heart-to-heart with his parents, laying his guilt and shame on the table. His parents had made it clear that they weren’t happy learning about the marriage or the baby so long after the facts, but they also reiterated that they loved him unconditionally. Burying his past had nothing to do with his parents’ love toward him and everything to do with his own disappointment in himself.
“How screwed up do I have to be to have buried that shit so deep that I literally forgot we got married?”
“About as screwed up as I was before I realized the mistakes I’d made with Morgyn. They say hindsight is twenty-twenty, but really the saying should be, hindsight is an ass kicker.”
Beckett had briefly dated their friend Morgyn Montgomery. He hadn’t been in love with her, but he’d loved her as a friend, and when she’d come to him for business advice, he’d been too shortsighted to see her full potential and had inadvertently given her bad advice. It wasn’t until after they’d broken up that he’d come to realize the mistakes he’d made.
Gavin glanced at the timer counting down on his phone. Eleven more minutes.
He might explode sooner than that.
“I really am sorry, man,” Beckett said for the hundredth time.
“This is all on me. I just don’t get it. I never bury shit like that.”
“It’s not like either of us had experience with this. It was a bad judgment call and, dude, you were really messed up. If you’d let that shit ride the surface, you never would have moved on.”
Gavin curled his fingers around the keys, struggling to resist the urge to go after her. “Maybe you can explain that to Harper. I can’t lose her, Beck. She’s everything to me.”
The front door opened, and Gavin jumped to his feet as Harper walked tentatively into the room.
“You came back.” With his heart in his throat, he went to her, searching her face for clues to whether she was going to end things or forgive him.
She blinked several times, her eyes moving between him and Beckett, who was on his feet, too, looking like he’d swallowed a frog. “I’m sorry I left.”
“It’s okay,” he said, feeling like he’d just run a marathon. “Are you ready to talk?”
She nodded.
“I’m sorry for causing this mess, Harper,” Beckett said. “For what it’s worth, Gavin’s the most honest guy I know, and he loves you with everything he has.”
She nodded again, wordlessly forgiving him with a softer, glassy gaze.
Beckett nudged Gavin’s shoulder and said, “I’m going out for a drive to give you guys some privacy. Can I borrow your keys?”
“Sure.” When Beckett didn’t move, Gavin shot him a get the hell out of here look.
“You’re still holding your keys.” Beckett pointed to Gavin’s clenched fist.
He handed him the keys. He’d forgotten he was holding them.
Beckett held his gaze and said, “Love you, man.”
His silent you’ve got this came through loud and clear, even if Gavin wasn’t so sure he did.
After Beckett left, Harper fidgeted nervously with her keys and said, “Are your parents still up? I’d like to apologize to them for leaving.”
“They went to bed an hour ago but, Harper, there’s no need to apologize. They understand why you left. They think the world of you. Can we sit down and talk?”
He started to put his hand on her lower back to guide her to the couch, but pulled back, unsure of just where she stood. For the first time since they’d met, things were awkward between them. He hated it, and he didn’t have the faintest clue how to fix it or even where to start.
She sat down, still fidgeting with her keys. Her hair curtained her face, making it hard to read her expression. The clinking of her keys amplified in the silence.
The alarm on Gavin’s phone went off, and Harper jumped. He grabbed the phone off the coffee table and turned it off. He took the keys from her hand and put them on the table with his phone. Then he covered her trembling fingers with his hand, and she curled her fingers around his. His emotions consumed him at that small touch.
“What was that alarm for?” she asked softly.
“You asked for space. I promised myself, and my father, I’d give you two hours before I went after you.”
She leaned into him a little, and it gave him hope.
“I hate that I caused this awkwardness between us, and I know saying I’m sorry isn’t enough to make up for the hurt I’ve caused you,” he said. “I know it’ll take time for you to trust me again, but if you’ll give me another chance—”
“Stop,” she whispered. “I think I understand why you kept it from everyone, including yourself.”
“You do?” Aw hell. He got all choked up again.
She nodded. “When I thought my life was ruined, I had a friend who helped me see how wrong I was. You didn’t have a friend like that back then. Someone to explain that Corinne’s actions weren’t your fault, or that you shouldn’t let one bad experience rock your foundation. That same friend probably would have reminded you that you achieved greatness in the eyes of your parents the day you were born, before you became anything other than their son. And that Beckett knows how incredible you are. That friend would explain that it wouldn’t matter if you chose a girl over your family for a day, a month, or even if you married her. They would always love you just the same.”
His chest constricted.
“You didn’t have a friend who would tell you that it’s important to be honest with the people who love you.” She held his hand tighter. “I’d hate to think about what I’d be like right now if I hadn’t had a friend to help me move past my bad experiences.”
He swallowed hard. “Harper…?”
She blinked away the dampness in her eyes and said, “You hurt me, Gavin, and that kind of hurt doesn’t just go away.”
“I know, and it kills me that I hurt you. I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you.”
“You don’t have to do that. We all handle love and grief differently. I’m hurt, but I love you for the man you are now. I just need to know if there’s anything else you think you might be hiding.”
“No. Other than that crazy shit that happened with Corinne, I’m a pretty boring guy.”
A relieved laugh came out soft and lovely, like
music to his ears, as tears slipped from her eyes. “You’re far from boring.”
“Oh, baby,” he said as he pulled her into his arms. He buried his face in her neck and hair, breathing her in. “I’m so sorry, and I’m so glad you came back. I thought I’d lost you.”
“You probably should thank Violet and Andre, by the way.”
“Violet and Andre?”
She nodded. “I didn’t tell them anything. Don’t worry.”
He wiped the tears from his eyes and said, “I’ll tell them. I don’t want secrets, sweetheart. Not from you, and not hiding in our closet to bite us in the ass. I thought I’d dealt with all that stuff with Corinne a long time ago, but I guess I just swept it under the rug.”
A small smile curved her lips and she said, “It’s a good thing I’m fairly capable with a broom.” She took his face between her soft hands, her beautiful blue eyes imploring him to love her wholly and completely. “Please don’t hurt me again, Gavin. It’s too hard.”
“Never again, sweetheart.”
She pressed her lips to his, kissing him lightly, again and again. Every touch healed another broken piece of his heart. He wanted to steal away with her, to love her until she couldn’t remember ever being hurt.
HARPER GAZED INTO Gavin’s eyes, seeing relief and so much love it was inescapable. She knew he saw the same emotions in her eyes, because she loved him with every cell of her being. She kissed him again, loving the greedy way he kissed her back. She pressed her lips to his cheek and then she bit his earlobe. He hissed and turned his face so he could kiss her lips. She knew he would feel the need to be careful with her tonight, but she didn’t want careful. She wanted affirmation of their love. She wanted to give him that, because as much as she’d gone through tonight, he’d gone through even more. He’d relived the anguish and shame he’d fought to move past for so long.
She slipped off her sandals, rose to her feet, and reached for his hand, pulling him up beside her. She touched his face, drawing it closer to hers again. She slicked her tongue along his lower lip, loving the way his eyes darkened, and she whispered, “Let’s love our hurt away.”
“Thank you, sweetheart,” he said, his voice full of emotion.
He lifted her into his arms, and she wrapped her legs around his waist, want and need vibrating through her. Their mouths came together as he carried her into the bedroom, closing the door with one hand without breaking their hungry kisses. He lowered himself to the edge of the bed with her on his lap and they continued feasting on each other’s mouths. He nipped at her lower lip, kissed her jaw, her neck, and dragged the strap of her dress down her shoulder with his teeth. Oh, what that did to her! His gaze locked on the lace trim of her salmon demi bra with sparking gold embellishments in the lace. He inhaled sharply, growing harder beneath her. She’d bought the lingerie set special for his birthday.
She slid the other strap down her shoulder and untied the bow at her waist, opening her wraparound dress, revealing her matching panties. His eyes flamed as she slipped off his lap and her dress fell away, puddling at her feet. She turned around, giving him an eyeful of the cheeky heart-shaped cutout across her bottom. She looked over her shoulder, and her heart pounded at the heat in his eyes.
“Happy birthday, Gavin.”
He was on his feet in two seconds flat, stripping off his clothes, and then his glorious naked body pressed against her back, his hands taking their fill up front.
“Sweet Jesus, Harper.”
He bit down on her shoulder, and she pressed her ass against his hard length, gyrating slowly. His cock was hard and hot on her cheeks through the cutout in her panties. She pressed her palms flat against the wall, knowing how much he loved her ass. His mouth blazed a path down her spine, slowing to kiss the dip at the base. His hands moved rough and possessive along her torso, up her stomach, and—good Lord—between her legs. He pushed his finger beneath her panties, stroking over her wetness and making the guttural, manly noises that always made her lose her mind. He traced his tongue along the cutout of the heart, tickling her skin as he teased her into a wet, needy frenzy. The sensations collided, making her moan and thrust, and when he dipped his fingers inside her, she clawed at the wall.
“Gavin,” she panted out.
He stripped off her panties, and his thumb landed on her clit, rubbing in a mind-numbing pace as his fingers dipped inside her and worked their magic, taking her up on her toes. His tongue slipped lower, taunting alongside his fingers, sending lust and love ricocheting through her. He quickened his pace, fucking her faster with his fingers, and sealed his mouth over her inner thigh, sucking hard. She clamped her mouth shut to keep from crying out as she spiraled over the edge. Her hips bucked wildly, her inner muscles pulsing tight and fast. He didn’t stop there. Oh no, Gavin knew just how to drive her to the brink of madness. He rose to his full height, pressing his hard chest against her back as he slid his thick cock between her legs, brushing against her swollen sex. He flattened his hands over hers, pinning her in place against the wall.
“Close your legs, baby. Squeeze me tight, like I’m inside you. I want you to come all over my cock.”
Her legs weakened with his dirty talk, but she managed to squeeze her legs together.
“That’s it. Tight, baby.”
She squeezed her thighs as tight as she could as he thrust his hips, sliding deliciously against her sex without entering her. She pressed back against him, wanting more, but she knew he wouldn’t give it to her until she came, and sweet heaven, she adored that.
He released one of her hands and gripped her chin, turning her face so he could claim her mouth in a ravenous kiss. His tongue thrust hard and insistent to the same rhythm as his hips. When his hand pushed down her belly and his fingers found the spot that sent fire through her loins, her head fell back against his chest.
“Oh God,” came out in one long, hot breath.
He sealed his mouth over the base of her neck, sucking and stroking with his tongue. Adrenaline coursed through her veins, making her dizzy with desire. He moved his thumb to the spot where his fingers were and put his fingers under his cock, holding it tight against her sex, putting more pressure in all the right places. She curled her fingers around his, trying her hardest not to let out the sounds exploding inside her as he took her up, up, up, until she was hanging on to her sanity by a thread.
“I need you on the bed, baby,” he ground out as he removed her bra, lowering her shaky arms to slide it off.
“No condom,” she said. “I want to feel you.”
He turned her in his arms, his eyes so dark and lustful, her legs weakened even more. “I want to feel you, too, baby. But I’m going to marry you one day, and there’s no way I’m going to take a chance that you get pregnant and think I’m marrying you for any reason other than my undying love for you.”
Her heart soared as his mouth came down over hers, and they tumbled onto the bed. He gave her several quick kisses as he stretched across the bed to open the nightstand drawer, like he couldn’t bear the thought of being apart from her. And after what happened earlier, she was right there with him.
He tossed a few condoms on the mattress, and she said, “Get the ties.” The relief in his eyes tugged at her heart. “I trust you, Gavin. I want it all, like our first night together.”
He pulled a black silk tie from the drawer and lowered himself over her, kissing her deeply. He rose up on his knees with a predatory look in his eyes, straddling her legs. His thick cock bobbed against him. Her pulse skyrocketed. She loved when they played. He dragged the soft silk teasingly around her breasts, over her nipples, and down the center of her body.
“I want you blindfolded, so every touch is heightened,” he said in a low voice so rich with desire she could practically taste it.
“Yes, do it.”
As he gently tied the silk over her eyes, she remembered the first time he’d blindfolded her. She’d been as scared as she was aroused. He’d seen her fear, and he’d told
her everything he was going to do before doing it. Her fear had quickly slipped away. He’d done the same thing after they’d come back together on the Cape, and now there was no fear left to work around.
She lay on the bed with her eyes covered, his body heat soaking into her skin as his chest grazed her breasts. Her nipples pebbled as he slithered lower, teasing one sensitive peak with his tongue. His hand covered her other breast, teasing the peak as he sucked the other into his mouth. He groaned, and the guttural, sexy sound brought a rush of heat to her core. He shifted again, and his hand moved between her legs.
“Yes,” she said breathily. When he lowered his mouth to her breast, she said, “Suck it hard.”
He sucked so hard she felt it between her legs. His fingers entered her in one fast push, sending electric shocks pinging through her. She clamped her mouth closed to keep from crying out. He sucked and fucked and sent her spiraling over the edge. When she started to come down from the peak, he did it again, sending her right back up to the clouds. She fisted her hands in the mattress, and then he slithered down her body, taking and tasting. He spread her legs roughly, holding them apart. She held her breath, bracing herself for his ravenous feast, but his tongue breezed over her sex light as a feather. The breath rushed from her lungs. He did it again, and she tried to stifle her moan.
“That’s it, baby. Don’t wake my parents.”
Oh God! That would be embarrassing!
He tickled her clit with his tongue, then circled back for another feathery tease, and so became the torturous rhythm. She held her breath with every swipe of his tongue, panting as he applied pressure where she needed it most, until she was so turned on, she could no longer decipher the difference. Every touch ignited inside her.
“So sweet, baby,” he said without missing a beat.
She dug her heels into the mattress, hanging on to her sanity by a thread. When his thick fingers passed over her wetness and touched her bottom, she moaned, spreading her legs wider.
“Do it,” she pleaded. “I can’t take the anticipation. I can’t think. I can barely breathe.”
Bayside Romance (Bayside Summers Book 5) Page 27