by Suzy Turner
The tattoo was identical to her father's. The only difference were the words that were placed beneath it. Hers read Semper Fidelis whilst her father's had something completely different... not that she could remember now.
A knock on the front door made her jump. Her first instinct was to hide. Since her mum had died, she hated having to talk to people, so she tiptoed to her window and gingerly peered out. Two men stood waiting patiently as they knocked for a second time.
When one of them looked upwards, Daisy flattened herself against the wall, holding the blue velvet curtain over her face.
After a few more minutes, she watched them as they shrugged and walked away. They climbed back into their car and drove away.
Rushing downstairs, she crouched to pick up the letter they'd pushed through the letterbox. Opening it, she gasped. They were being evicted from their home. The house she'd grown up in. Where would they go? What would happen to her?
Later that night as she sat curled up in front of the TV, the electricity went off. Not because of a problem down the line or anything like that. No, it was because they hadn't paid their bill.
She stood up angrily and kicked at the coffee table. To her amazement, the table was lifted high into the air and crashed through the wall into the dining room.
Standing still, her face went white as she realised the destruction she'd caused. But moments later, she lifted the tall glass vase, the one her mum had always filled with a bunch of daisies every Saturday morning and hurled it at the wall, shattering it into tiny pieces. Next, without even thinking, she picked up the television like it was a piece of cardboard and tossed it through the same hole in the wall, smashing it to the dining room floor.
She tore the beige velvet curtains from their pole and sat, ripping them apart as if they were nothing but pieces of paper. The simple act of making a horrendous mess somehow made her feel better... albeit temporarily. But she continued her trail of destruction until the entire bottom floor of the house looked like it had been hit by a tornado.
Standing at the foot of the stairs, Daisy surveyed the mess she'd made before her knees buckled beneath her.
'Mum... I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Mum. I'm just so... so... angry. I don't know what to do. Where are we going to go? Oh Mum... why did you leave us?'
Some hours later, curled on the floor in the darkness of the late afternoon, Daisy watched as a tiny light in the distance began to slowly move towards her, becoming brighter and brighter until she had to shield her eyes with her arm.
'Daisy?' whispered a voice.
'Y..yes?'
'Daisy dear, it's me. Nanna.'
'Nanna?'
Daisy removed her arm and lifted her upper body off of the floor, so that she sat cross legged looking into the light.
'Yes dear, your Nanna. Oh deary me, whatever has happened here, my love? I know you're feeling angry but this is no way to handle it. You mustn't take out your anger on things like this... or on people, my dear. You must learn to channel that anger. You're so strong, my dear. You're just like your mother in that respect. And that's why you need to pull yourself together. You need to look after your father. Beau is a good man, Daisy. He just can't take the pain. He can't take the loss. Your dear mother was like his backbone and he's lost, so very lost without her. You must be strong, Daisy. You must help him through this... that's the only way you'll be able to help yourself through this.'
'Nanna?'
'Yes dear?'
'Is Mum with you? Can I speak to her?'
Daisy watched the light as it began to lose its sparkle and the faint outline of her grandmother appeared in front of her.
'Now Daisy. Your mother is resting with all of the family that went before her. She's not quite strong enough to see you or your father. She wanted to, of course she wanted to, but we didn't feel it was a good idea. Not right now. Not yet, my dear. It's too soon.'
Daisy's bottom lip quivered.
'Now now, my dear. I know you're terribly sad but you must understand that you will see her again. At some stage we will all be together again. But now is not that time, do you understand?'
Daisy slowly nodded.
'But Nanna. How can I see you? Are you real? Am I dreaming?'
Her grandmother smiled and held out her hand. Daisy felt a warm feeling on her cheek, the same kind of warm feeling she'd got when her mother had touched her.
'You're not dreaming, my dear. I had to come and reassure you that all will be alright, eventually. As long as you stay strong. You're a very special girl, Daisy and I believe you've already received a sign about that. It comes from your father's side of the family, my dear. At some point you will understand what it's all about and why you have it.'
'What Nanna? What are you talking about?'
'Semper Fidelis, my dear, Semper Fidelis.'
And then Daisy was alone again, curled up at the foot of the stairs in the darkness.
CHAPTER 5
The following day, Daisy escaped to the only other place she ever felt safe: Abney Park.
Abney Park was a huge former cemetery that had been left to become overgrown over the years. Some people used it to walk their dogs during the day, and for others, it was a place to escape from their busy day to day lives. Though many others kept their distance as the place was also known to be creepy, frightening and possibly even haunted.
Yet to Daisy, it felt like home. There were plenty of hiding places that few others knew about. She could stay there for hours on end and not come across a single person.
Sitting beneath her favourite statue, the one of the sleeping lion, Daisy opened her sketch book and began to draw. Soon the image of a beautiful woman with a contagious smile began to look back at her. Daisy stopped what she was doing and just looked at the picture before tearing the page out of the book and screwing it up, tossing it to her side with a silent scream. The piece of paper began to blow away in the wind, hopping along the dirt and settling between two ancient headstones metres away from where she sat.
She tried to ignore it but seconds later, Daisy scrambled to her feet and rushed over, tripping and falling in the process, knocking her knee on the gravestone.
'Ouch!'
'Oh are you alright?' said a voice that nearly scared her half to death.
Grabbing the picture and shoving it into her pocket, Daisy turned to see who the voice belonged to. A guy about a couple of years older than her stood leaning casually on the lion. He reminded her of that guy from Oliver Twist, you know the one that takes Oliver under his wing. Cheeky-looking and a bit scary.
Daisy gulped and turned to run away.
'Don't go,' he yelled. 'I didn't mean to startle you.'
His voice, all tender and gentle, didn't match his face.
Daisy guiltily turned, her cheeks reddening as she stopped walking.
'I... I saw you drawing and wanted to talk but,' he shrugged his shoulders and smiled a lop-sided grin. Stepping forward toward her, he brushed his long dark fringe to one side and said, 'I'm Jack.'
Daisy smiled. The Artful Dodger, that's who he reminded her of and his real name was Jack too.
'Daisy,' she answered standing still.
'You're a good artist,' he said, pointing to her sketch book.
Daisy shook her head shyly, 'not really,' she whispered.
But he nodded strongly, 'You are... honestly.'
She smiled.
'So... what are you doing here all on your own?'
This time, Daisy was the one to shrug.
'That's okay, if you'd rather not say. I get it,' he said sadly.
'I really should go,' Daisy said. 'My... erm... Dad's waiting for me.'
Jack smiled, 'Yeh, okay. Maybe I'll see you around... Daisy.'
She reddened, nodded and turned, running away as fast as she could.
Within minutes, Daisy stood outside her home. The home that wouldn't be home for much longer. Taking a deep breath, she slid the key into the lock and walked inside. Her Dad sat
on the bottom step of the stairs.
'Daisy?' he whispered.
The shock of hearing him speak made her drop the keys. Leaning forward to pick them up, she said nothing, just waited to see what he had to say for himself.
'We have to leave,' he stuttered. He didn't mention the almighty mess she'd made. Perhaps he understood.
'I know. I saw the letter.'
She watched him struggle to speak.
'Where are we going to go?' she asked.
He gulped hard, 'I...I...don't...' he croaked, 'I don't know, love.'
He hadn't called her 'love' in such a long time that she felt a lump in her throat.
'Do we have any money?'
Beau slowly shook his head.
'You mean, you and mum never saved anything up?'
He looked embarrassed.
'But why? What about me, Dad? Did you never think about me?'
She was angry.
'Daisy, I know... I know you're angry. I'm angry too. I never thought this would happen. I always thought we would be okay the way we were.'
'You should have planned for emergencies Dad. You never know what's going to happen in life. I... I thought you and Mum were better prepared than this. This is crazy. So we don't have any money, we don't have anywhere to go. You don't have a job now that you're drunk all the time. What are we gonna do? Dad, answer me that? Oh and while you're actually talking to me, perhaps you can explain this too,' she shouted as she turned around and lifted up her sweatshirt to reveal the tattoo inked into her back.
When Beau saw it, he gasped loudly.
'But, you're only 15,' he stuttered. 'It's not supposed to happen until you're 16.'
'What Dad? What is it? And why shouldn't it happen until I'm 16?'
Beau stood up to take a closer look.
'Semper Fidelis,' he said with a sad smile. 'I should have known.'
'But what is it Dad? I don't understand?'
Beau's eyebrows knitted together as he turned his daughter back around, placing a hand on her shoulders, Daisy saw a tear slide down his cheek.
'I'm sorry, Daisy. But this is all happening at the wrong time. You don't deserve any of this. You deserve a much better father than me. I'm so very sorry. You're better off without me. Now that I know you've developed already. I know you can get on with your life. I know you're going to be alright. You're so strong, in more ways than you know. You will get through this and you shouldn't have to do it with a drunken father to deal with. You'll manage, Daisy. I promise you that.'
The last few words came out in sobs.
'But Dad,' she whispered. 'I don't understand.'
'We have to be out of the house by tomorrow afternoon. You're going to be alright, Daisy,' he said sadly. Leaning forward, he gently kissed her forehead and then before she knew what had happened, the front door was open and he'd gone. Again. But this time it felt final. Daisy knew he'd left for good. She knew she was now on her own.
CHAPTER 6
She still had the money from the sale of the car that she tucked carefully into her bra top. All her treasured belongings were folded and placed into the large rucksack that she hiked onto her back. As she stepped through the front door, she took a long look backwards, wiping her eyes roughly with the back of her fingerless gloved hand and closed the door behind her.
She knew exactly where she would go. It was her second home after all.
Walking through the old wrought iron gates, she almost felt like she was being welcomed home. For the first time in weeks, Daisy smiled, took a long deep breath and stepped over the threshold into Abney Park.
Taking her usual route, she followed the well worn pathway until she reached the old lion, as she liked to call him. When she got there, she gently stroked his sleeping face and let her rucksack fall to the floor beside her. She even did a little twirl before falling onto her bottom with a sigh.
Laying backwards onto the moss covered ground, Daisy looked upwards at the patchy blue sky, watching as cloud after cloud scattered past in a hurry. The tall trees swayed in the breeze as if dancing to a silent overture. Daisy began to imagine what they could be dancing to as she watched intently how they started to move more slowly across the sky. Soon she was humming along, trying to match the song to the movements, like a family game she remembered from Christmas time where they would take it in turns to hum a song and the others would have to guess what song it was. Daisy smiled as she remembered how good a voice her dad had. He was such an amazing singer. In fact, he could quite easily have done that for a living... if he wasn't always so drunk these days.
Unkeen to think about her father, Daisy returned her attention to the potential sounds of the dancing trees. Ultimately choosing Coldplay's Paradise as the perfect song. With her eyes now closed, Daisy sang quietly along:
'Para-para-paradise, Para-para-paradise, Para-para-paradise...'
'It sounds like you're singing about yourself... Daisy,' said a familiar voice, making her jump up in fear.
'Jesus!' she yelped at the same time.
'Oh... there I go again, frightening the life out of you. Sorry,' Jack said, blushing.
'Do you mind if I sit down?' he asked politely.
Eyeing him up and down, Daisy decided she had no choice. It's not like she owned the park.
'Sure,' she said, moving her bag out of his way.
'You're an amazing singer,' he offered.
Daisy spluttered, knowing very well that he was lying. She had always sounded terrible when she tried to sing. Her mum had always cringed and laughed.
'Then you must be tone deaf because I can't sing.'
He looked at her with an odd expression.
'I ain't tone deaf and I'm telling you, you can sing. Really, in fact I'd go so far as to say your singing is even better than your drawing and that's saying something.'
Daisy laughed, 'I really think you must be on something, then.'
'Actually, I'm a musician myself so I know when someone can sing.'
'Whatever,' said Daisy before realising how horribly rude that sounded. 'Sorry,' she added, lowering her eyes to the ground.
'S'okay. What are you doing here, anyway? You look like a runaway or something?'
Daisy shrugged her shoulders.
Jack held up his hands, 'Still not ready to talk then? No problem.'
Daisy felt even guiltier. She had been brought up to be polite and friendly and here she was being rude and totally unfriendly.
'Look, I'm sorry... it's just... a long, complicated story, that's all.'
'Well, Daisy,' he said as he leaned backwards on to his elbow, 'I've got all the time in the world.'
CHAPTER 7
It was the first time Daisy had ever had a real friend. Crazy, considering she was now 15. But she'd always felt different from the other kids at school and it never really helped when most of them at that place had been so mean to her. In the end, she'd just decided she was a loner, at least at school, anyway. Away from school, she had never needed any friends because she was so close to her mum and dad. The thought choked her up and she tried to push them from her mind. She didn't want to cry again. She'd spent so much time crying over the past few months that she felt all cried out.
Turning over in the darkness, Daisy shivered as she watched the near full moon through the hole in the roof. She zipped the sleeping bag up tighter around her face and watched a slither of cloud momentarily darken the world around her. When the moon appeared again, she sighed, rolling over on to her side and closed her eyes.
She'd been sleeping in the dilapidated old chapel for just over two months and it was getting colder, but it was the only place she could find that wasn't completely open to the elements. She'd gotten by okay until then but the last of her money would soon run out and then what would she do? She'd had no choice but to buy herself a decent sleeping bag and some other 'camping' equipment to allow her to continue to live outdoors, but the lack of funds was beginning to worry her. She fell asleep wondering how she
would feed herself.
The following morning, Daisy woke up to find Jack sitting a few metres away watching her.
'Hey,' she yawned. 'What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be in school?'
'It's Sunday, Daisy,' he laughed, throwing a stone in her direction.
'Oh, right,' she said as she climbed out of the sleeping bag and shivered slightly. It was starting to get a little chilly.
'Are you okay, Daisy?'
She nodded, folding it and shoving it back into her rucksack with the rest of her worldly possessions.
'Why do you ask?'
'Well, it's seriously cold now. I don't know how you're coping with all this.'
'I'm coping fine thank you very much. I can look after myself,' she said, her chin jutting out in front of her.
Jack frowned, 'Daisy... you can't go on like this.'
'Course I can,' she sulked. 'Besides, where am I supposed to go? What am I supposed to do? I'm 15, Jack. I can look after myself just fine. Just... just... mind your own business.'
Her face flushed a deep red colour as she realised she was having her first argument with her only friend. She didn't like it. But when she turned back to apologise, he'd gone.
'Great,' she muttered under her breath before plonking herself down on the stone floor. She held her head in her hands and shook it. Tears threatened to erupt but she knocked them back, refusing to cry. She never wanted to cry again... about anything.
Taking a piece of stale bread out of her bag, she stood up, put the bag on her back and walked out of the chapel into the cool fresh air. She took a bite, chewed for a few moments and tried hard to swallow what tasted like a piece of cardboard. It was gross. But it was all she had and she really didn't want to spend her last few pounds... not yet anyway.
Walking through the cemetery, she shied away from the early morning joggers, dog walkers and photographers keen to take advantage of the light. She felt like her space was being invaded but it was the same every Sunday morning at Abney Park.
Everywhere she went, she spotted a stranger wandering about and she wanted to scream at them to go away. But it didn't belong to her. She knew that... deep down.