Lisa shrugged. She didn’t feel like arguing. Besides, she couldn’t avoid his mother forever if she wanted to have a serious relationship with Josh. Maybe visiting her wouldn’t be so bad after all.
“Okay, Josh,” she said. “I’ll go, but only if you’re sure I wouldn’t be intruding on your family. It sounds like a special time for all of you, getting to see your mother again, and I wouldn’t want to ruin everything by getting in the way.”
“You won’t,” said Josh. “My family is so dysfunctional that you’d have a hard time making things worse than they already are.”
Lisa thought about her own parents and understood what he meant. She didn’t want to admit it, but if anything, his family was even stranger than hers, especially if she included Richard in her estimations.
“I’ve been wondering,” she said. “Is your grandfather still around?”
“No, but I finally found out why my dad banished him in the first place,” said Josh. “It’s a long story, but basically, Richard abandoned my dad when he needed him, and now my dad doesn’t trust him.”
“Do you trust him?” said Lisa.
“I don’t know,” said Josh. “Here, let me show you something.”
He led her up the beach to the place he had left his backpack. Before he opened it, Lisa saw him glance in either direction. She wondered why he was nervous about being noticed. Josh reached into his backpack, pulled out a notebook, and handed it to her.
“Richard gave me this before he left,” he said.
Lisa flipped through the notebook. Richard’s handwriting covered the initial pages, and she assumed it was a journal, but it wasn’t long before diagrams and pictures and lists of data replaced the words. Lisa realized she wasn’t looking at the casual ramblings of an old man reminiscing about the past.
“Josh, what is this?” she said.
He hesitated, as if he didn’t want to admit the truth.
“It’s information about the research Richard and Peterson did a long time ago when they were working together,” he said. “I’ve read it several times over the past few days, just trying to make sense of the whole thing. It’s incredible. Everything they did is in there, from the day they started the project to the day Richard found out Peterson was testing the drug on real people.”
Lisa felt a twinge of frustration. Would there ever be a time when she could focus on Josh and forget about the hateful drug? It reminded her of so many things she didn’t want to think about. Still, Josh had brought it up for a reason; maybe Lisa would have to embrace the subject if she wanted to understand him.
“Is it okay with you if I read it?” she said.
“Sure, but you probably won’t think it’s very interesting,” said Josh. “It’s mostly scientific jargon about what they did in the laboratory.”
Lisa began to read. As she delved into Richard’s account of Peterson’s downfall, she began to appreciate the devotion that had been required to invent the drug. If Graham and his boss possessed the same tenacity, thwarting them would be almost impossible. When she finally reached the end, the sun had climbed over the zenith. Lisa closed the notebook. Josh had wandered down to the water’s edge and was standing there with his hands in his pockets.
“Why did Richard give you this?” said Lisa.
Josh glanced over his shoulder.
“Oh, probably because Graham wants it,” he said.
Lisa’s heart leaped up into her throat. With shaking hands, she stuffed the notebook into his backpack.
“Josh, what on earth were you thinking?” she said with more frustration than she intended. “You shouldn’t have brought it here. Graham is always wandering around on the beach with Molly. He could show up at any moment.”
“Lisa, we’d see him coming before he got anywhere near us,” said Josh. “I know we need to be careful, but this is the safest place we could be right now. Graham can’t sneak up on us here.”
Lisa wrapped her arms around her knees and gazed at the glowing horizon until her eyes ached from the brightness of the sun reflecting off the water. She knew he was right, but her fear suggested otherwise. Josh sat down beside her.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I wish we could focus on each other instead of having to worry about all this other stuff. What do you think I should do with the notebook? I’ve been carrying it around, but I don’t want to take it to school tomorrow, and I certainly don’t want to leave it at the apartment. My dad might find it.”
“Why don’t you just get rid of it?” said Lisa.
“Richard said it might be useful if Graham did something crazy, but I’m not sure it’s worth the risk,” said Josh. “Graham doesn’t know I have it, but he’s got a knack for figuring things out, and it’s making me feel paranoid.”
Lisa realized she wasn’t alone in her fear. Josh was just as worried as she was—maybe even more, now that Graham had a reason to come after him. His anxiety forced her to ignore her own. Not knowing what to say, she took his hand and interlaced her fingers with his. He smiled at her, and some of the tension left his face, but he still looked worried. She hated to see him under so much pressure.
“Josh, if Richard gave you the notebook, you can do whatever you want with it,” she said. “You don’t have to worry about pleasing him. He’s not even here. Besides, he never should have dumped it on you, especially if it’s dangerous, and it’s unreasonable for him to expect you to drag it around with you for the rest of your life.”
“It would be a relief to know it’s not just lying around for someone to find,” said Josh. “If Graham wants it, I’d rather not let him have it. He obviously doesn’t know the difference between right and wrong. Besides, I saw what the drug did to my mom, and I don’t want anyone else to suffer like that.”
“Well, there’s your answer,” said Lisa.
“That’s what I thought, I just wanted to get your opinion about it,” said Josh. “If we destroy it once and for all, we won’t have to worry about it anymore. I’ve been trying to decide how to dispose of it. I was going to burn it to prevent Graham from salvaging it, but I couldn’t do it at the apartment for obvious reasons.” He reached into his backpack again and retrieved the notebook and a cigarette lighter. “I don’t see any reason to wait, do you?”
“No,” said Lisa. “I think it’s the right decision.”
Josh wasted no more time. He tore the pages out of the notebook and set them on fire. Lisa watched as the orange flames reduced the information to ashes that blew away on the breeze. She thought she had never been in a stranger situation, but she felt like she was exactly where she needed to be, sitting beside Josh in the bright sun, helping him destroy the deadly blueprint of Peterson’s research. When the deed was done, she saw the relief on his face.
“There,” he said. “It’s gone, and Graham can’t get it anymore.”
They spent the afternoon together, and then they returned to the house, taking their time. Lisa’s trepidation increased as she anticipated visiting Josh’s mother, but she kept her feelings to herself. Josh waited for her in the driveway while she hurried inside to get her mother’s permission, and as soon as she was ready to go, they drove to the apartment where Josh’s family was staying.
∞∞∞
Josh unlocked the apartment door and opened it for Lisa. Feeling apprehensive, she stepped into the living room. It was furnished with a couch and a coffee table, but Lisa thought it looked nothing like a home. It was too empty.
Shannon and Stephen were sitting on the couch, eating pizza and arguing with each other in a good-natured way. They fell silent when Josh and Lisa walked in. Stephen managed to smile, but Shannon scrambled to her feet.
“I’m out,” she said.
Without looking at Lisa, she left the room.
Stephen moved over, and Josh and Lisa sat down.
“Where’s Dad?” said Josh.
Stephen took another piece of pizza.
“He’s changing Yvonne’s clothes,” he said. “You know
how upset Mom gets when Yvonne isn’t clean.” He nudged the pizza toward Josh and Lisa. “Here, help yourselves. There’s enough for everyone.”
Lisa didn’t have much of an appetite, and she felt guilty about taking anything from Josh’s family, since they appeared to be living so frugally. She declined Stephen’s offer, and as she gazed around the austere apartment, she wondered if Josh’s family couldn’t afford to have nice things. It was something she had never thought about before, and it made her regret her snobbish behavior more than ever.
Josh’s father hurried in a few minutes later with Yvonne over his shoulder. Yvonne was wearing a pink dress and a headband with an enormous flower on it. She was irritable, as if she realized the odds of impressing Josh’s mother were slim to none.
“Stephen, please tell Shannon we’re ready,” said Josh’s father.
“But Dad, you haven’t even gotten a chance to eat,” said Stephen.
“I’ll have something when we get back,” he said. “We’ve got to go. Your mom is probably wondering where we are.”
Stephen trudged into the hall and knocked on Shannon’s door. She answered the summons reluctantly and didn’t say a word while they drove to the hospital. Lisa sat in the back seat beside Josh, trying to ignore Shannon’s hostility. She finally understood how it felt to be on the receiving end of such spite, and by the time they arrived at the hospital, an aura of misery had settled over her.
They went up to the unit where Josh’s mother was staying. The room was at the end of the hall. Josh’s father paused outside the sliding door, which was made of glass. The privacy curtains were closed, preventing anyone from seeing inside.
“I don’t want to overwhelm your mom with too many visitors,” said Josh’s father. “Let me go in first and see how she’s doing.”
He went in with Yvonne and left the others standing in the hall.
“Great,” said Shannon. “Who are we kidding? She doesn’t want to see us. We’re only here because Dad’s tired of us pestering him about her. I wish I’d stayed at the apartment. This is stupid.”
Lisa expected Josh to contradict Shannon, but he didn’t. She wondered if he felt the same way about his mother. They waited for ten minutes in anxious anticipation, and then Josh’s father invited Shannon and Stephen to join him. They went inside, leaving a gap in the curtains.
Lisa saw Josh’s mother sitting in a chair near the window. The red light of the setting sun illuminated her face, and Lisa was surprised by how vigorous she looked, despite her extreme emaciation. She resisted the impulse to stare and turned her attention to Josh. The bleak terror in his eyes shocked her.
“Josh, what’s wrong?” she said.
“Nothing,” he said. “It just hit me all of a sudden: now that your dad isn’t killing my mom with that drug anymore, I might have enough time to make things right with her—to finally be close with her. It’s what I’ve always wanted, but she’s never allowed it to happen.”
“I don’t understand why she would do that,” said Lisa.
“Neither do I,” said Josh. “I just want her to be proud of me, you know—not because I’ve followed her rules, but because I’m her son. Sometimes I feel like she won’t see me the same way if I make a mistake, and I don’t want to disappoint her.”
“I can’t imagine you disappointing anyone,” said Lisa. Glancing over her shoulder, she saw Josh’s mother leaning forward in her chair with her eyes riveted on Shannon and Stephen. They were standing rigidly in front of her as if they were being reprimanded for something. She looked away, not wanting to intrude on their privacy, but she was still marveling at the strangeness of the situation when the door finally opened, and Shannon and Stephen appeared, followed by Josh’s father with Yvonne.
“You can go in,” he said to Lisa and Josh. “She specifically said she wanted to talk to the two of you alone, so the rest of us will be downstairs in the cafeteria. Please take your time. There’s no hurry.”
“But we were only in there for a few minutes,” said Stephen.
“Stephen, there will be other chances,” he said.
“When she found out Lisa was here, she couldn’t have cared less about us,” said Shannon under her breath.
Lisa ignored her. Josh opened the door, and they went into the room. When they got close enough, Josh’s mother grabbed them each by the hand, dragging them forward with a surprising amount of strength. Lisa shivered in her bony grasp.
“Oh, Josh,” said his mother. “Let me take a good look at you. I can hardly believe it. I remember when you were a tiny baby with the tendency to fuss when you didn’t get what you wanted, but here you are—all grown up with a gorgeous girlfriend and a bright future. I’m so glad you listened to me.”
“It wasn’t exactly like that,” said Josh.
She didn’t seem to have heard him.
“You’ve brought so much joy into my life,” she said in a faint voice. “Even when you were a little boy, I knew you were special. You’ve always exceeded my expectations, Josh. Whenever I think about you, my heart overflows with gratitude. I couldn’t be more pleased with you.”
“Really?” said Josh.
“Of course,” she said. “You’re my flesh and blood.”
She stood up with some difficulty and sat down on the edge of the bed, gesturing for Lisa to take the chair she had recently vacated. Lisa didn’t dare to refuse. She remembered the dreadful hypnotic manner in which Josh’s mother had manipulated her father, and now the same thing was happening to Josh—unless his mother was actually being sincere, which was even more disturbing.
“Make yourself comfortable, Lisa,” she said. “Don’t be shy. You’re part of the family now. Josh, there’s another chair over there in the corner. Why don’t you bring it here while I get better acquainted with Lisa? We have so much to talk about.”
After he stepped away, she gazed into Lisa’s face with adoring eyes.
“I can’t tell you how delighted I am,” she said. “You’re going to make Josh so happy. It’s not only because you’re such a beautiful girl. There’s an elegance about you that’s very charming. Your parents did an excellent job with you—and of course, you grew up in the lap of luxury. We can’t discount the effects of that! Don’t worry, darling, it’s a good thing. You’re obviously the product of your environment.”
“Thank you,” said Lisa, who was too bewildered to be offended.
Josh returned with the chair and sat down. He made a face at Lisa when his mother wasn’t looking, and she realized he had heard every word of their conversation. She smiled at him to reassure him, but he didn’t look convinced.
“Now Josh, I want you to tell me all the details,” said his mother. “How long have you and Lisa been a couple?”
“Officially?” said Josh. Lisa could tell he was getting more and more flustered. “Well, we’ve gone out a couple of times, but I’d really rather not talk about it. It’s between me and Lisa. I hope you understand.”
“Oh, it’s gone that far already?” she said.
“Mom, stop,” said Josh. “That’s not what I meant.”
“It’s fine with me, as long as you’re careful,” she said. She turned to Lisa. “Has your mom talked to you about sex?”
Lisa wanted to die from embarrassment. She hoped Josh would protest, but he was speechless with horror. His mother misinterpreted their silence with a knowing smile.
“It’s okay, Lisa,” she said. “You don’t have to worry about me telling your parents. I’m good at keeping secrets. I just want to make sure you have all the information you need so you can make good decisions. You don’t want to get pregnant until you’re ready. You’re on birth control, aren’t you?”
“No,” said Lisa. “I’ll talk to my mother about it.”
She didn’t intend to follow through with this statement, but she doubted Josh would survive much longer if their conversation continued on its present course, so she didn’t feel too guilty about lying. To her relief, Josh’s mother se
emed satisfied.
“I’m happy you’re such a responsible girl, Lisa,” she said. “That’s partly why I admire you so much. You don’t have to figure everything out on your own, though. I’m here for you if you ever need someone to confide in. You can always talk to me if you have questions, and that goes for any subject.”
Lisa hoped the disgust she felt didn’t reveal itself on her face. She wondered if Josh’s mother had secured her father’s trust with a similarly empty promise, but she recognized she would never get a better opportunity to turn the conversation around.
“Actually, I was wondering how you’re doing,” she said. “Josh mentioned you might be getting chemotherapy.”
“I’m going to give it a try,” she said. “I’ve got nothing to lose.”
“Maybe you won’t react badly to it,” said Lisa. “You never know. Some people don’t have trouble with it.” She paused, and decided to take a chance. “My grandmother was on chemotherapy about ten years ago. She wasn’t staying with us then, so I didn’t get to see how it affected her, but she said it wasn’t too horrible.”
Josh’s mother didn’t flinch at the mention of Lisa’s grandmother.
“I didn’t know your grandmother had cancer,” she said. “I hope it doesn’t run in the family. It would be rotten for your kids to inherit it from both sides. I know you’re not planning to have a baby any time soon, but you’ll have to get tested for any weird mutations before you and Josh decide to conceive.”
“Mom, we have to go,” said Josh, leaping to his feet. “It was nice seeing you. You seem to be doing great. I hope everything goes well for you tomorrow. Maybe we’ll visit you again—or maybe not. Come on, Lisa, let’s get out of here.”
He fled, despite his mother’s protests. Lisa excused herself and hurried after him, but he was halfway down the hall before she caught up with him.
“Josh, slow down,” she said. “It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not,” he said, not even looking at her. “I’m sorry, Lisa. I shouldn’t have brought you here. I’m such an idiot. This is all my fault. I didn’t expect her to question you like that, but I should’ve known she would make a scene about something. She always ruins everything. Why didn’t I stop her?”
The Patient from Silvertree: Book One in the Silvertree Series Page 20