double-check suite reservations, food, and strippers for the bachelor party
5:00 p.m. rehearsal
6:00 p.m. rehearsal dinner
10:00 p.m. bachelor party
For the first time in my life, I hated my ability to plan everything right down to the minute in order to get maximum productivity out of my day. There was no fucking wiggle room in this schedule. Doubly irritated now, I selected the rideshare app to call a car for me and Jared and sent a text to the guys at the hotel to make sure they were headed to the tux shop too.
“I… Maybe we can snag a moment during the rehearsal dinner?”
She stood and faced me with a sad smile on her lips. “This weekend isn’t supposed to be about me, Tommy. We shouldn’t be sneaking around during Jared and Brandi’s rehearsal dinner to weigh the pros and cons of acting on feelings that we have no business feeling.”
“Darcy.” I moved in as close as I dared. “There are absolutely no cons to having this conversation. I will find the time.”
“You can’t just create more hours in a day, Tommy,” she said, laughing at what probably sounded like a borderline tantrum to her ears. “This schedule is packed. Maybe that’s the universe’s way to prove to us that we shouldn’t do this.”
“I don’t accept that,” I said. “What about after the bachelor party?”
Darcy’s brow creased with a frown. “After? I assumed that it would go on until dawn.”
“Yeah, but it’s in a strip club, which means — theoretically — that I could end the night when the lights come up.”
“Really?” She arched an eyebrow and looked down at her phone to read the details on the itinerary. “You’re going to leave a bachelor party with six strippers to come back here and talk to me?”
“There’s a shit-ton of things I’d rather do than babysit a bunch of drunk frat boys, Darcy.” You, for instance.
“And is one of those things old lady shit like drinking bourbon, while watering my plants, and gliding around my empty townhome in a caftan like a boo hag until dawn?”
“Wait, am I supposed to let the boo hag ride me in this version of the story, or—”
“Tomás!” Darcy squeaked then laughed until she was red-faced at my vulgar joke.
This was all I really wanted. To have her leaning into me, her laughter reverberating through both of us so that I couldn’t help but laugh with her. While she was still laughing, I slipped my arms around her.
God. She smelled good and felt even better.
Gradually her laughter died down, and she looked up at me but made no move to step out of my embrace.
“Tomás Martinez, if I didn’t know you better, I would swear you were trying to cop a feel.”
“Hmm, I would say that you know me very well.” I pulled her even closer so that she could feel what holding her this way did to me. “I am absolutely copping a feel, Darcy MacFarland.”
“Jesus, Tommy,” she whispered, dropping her head on my shoulder. She growled one of her soft kitten growls, and my dick throbbed where it was pressed against her belly at the sound. When she looked up at me this time, her lips were parted, pupils blown, giving me all the signs that she wanted to be kissed, and I was barely able to resist it.
“So…if you’re still rambling around when the bachelor party is over, I’ll come back here, we can have a drink and talk?”
Darcy sighed. A soft sound of surrender. “Okay,” she agreed finally.
I bit my lip in a feeble attempt to hide my giddy smile. “Good, great—”
“Tomás!” Jared called, his voice trailing down the front hallway and making Darcy slip out of my embrace. “Mom? Is Tomás with you?”
“Yeah! We’re in my study!” she answered, grabbing my hand to drag me out into the hallway behind her.
“Ah, good. My phone just told me it was time to head to the tux shop.”
“Yup, I already called the car. It’ll be here in three minutes,” I said.
“You’re so fucking efficient,” Jared said, hooking his arm around my neck. Before brunch, I suggested that he should drink a couple of mimosas to take the edge off of his hangover. It appeared that he took me up on that…and then some.
I could only imagine the condition the other three in our crew were in.
Actual dread filled me when I thought about the bachelor party and how it was going to be more of the same shit that went down last night but with strippers and probably a few illegal substances.
Fuck.
But now, at least, I had the promise of seeing Darcy when these drunk fools finally passed out, and that gave me something to hold onto.
8
Darcy
In the few hours between sending everyone home from brunch and getting things ready for the rehearsal dinner, I managed to lubricate my bones and my attitude just a touch, but not too much. My sisters and I lazed about on the piazza with hand fans, shooting the shit in a way that we haven’t had an opportunity to do in ages.
“Brandi seems like a nice girl,” Amelia said as she swung her swollen feet into my lap and wiggled her piggies — a silent overture to have her feet rubbed, which I obliged.
“She is!” I said with a bit too much enthusiasm, but the bourbon probably had a lot to do with that. “I haven’t spent a lot of time getting to know her. It’s hard with them living so far away, but I plan to make more of an effort once they’re back from their honeymoon.”
“Where are they goin’ again?” James asked.
“I got them a week in the Grand Caymans.”
“Wow. Mama and Daddy only sprung for a four-day weekend on Tybee Island,” Amelia grumbled with a tiny twinge of bitterness.
“Well, Jared’s mama has more than enough money to do something twice as nice for him and his new wife,” I countered. “And he’s my only son, so I will always go above and beyond for him.”
“Amen to that,” James said, raising her glass of bourbon.
“How are you feeling about all this?” Amelia asked.
“All of what?”
“I don’t know… It’s a big transition, your kid getting married and going off to start a family of his own. Does it make you wish you had more children?”
My gut clenched. I loved my sister, but I swear she could be petty and manipulative in the worst ways when she felt like she’d been slighted. She dug around and found the place she knew would hurt the most and poked it until she got the reaction she wanted. Knowing this, I bit back the urge to defend myself.
“If it were up to me, I would have. But to answer your question, I’m having mixed feelings about all of this.” I stopped for a moment to sip my drink and find the words to describe what I was feeling.
“I’m happy that Jared has fallen in love and found someone that he wants to spend his life with. I’m excited for a whole new set of milestones and adventures that I can experience with him and through him. And grandbabies… I’m excited to have some of those, too. But…”
When I paused this time, it wasn’t to take a drink. It was to swallow back the tears that had been building since my son told me he’d found the girl he wanted to marry.
“It just isn’t happening the way you thought it would,” James finished for me. “That’s not your fault, Darcy.”
“I know, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less,” I whispered. “Ugh, why the fuck did you make me talk about this, Amelia?”
“Because you never talk about your feelings, Darcy. You just keep ‘em bottled up inside, and that’s just not healthy, you know. Bottlin’ up your emotions can cause cancer.”
“Amelia!” James snapped. “Do your thoughts pass through any sort of filter before they come out of your mouth?”
“Shit, Darcy, I’m sorry!” my little sister said, wide-eyed and apologetic. “It happened so long ago that I forget sometimes.”
“Sure.” I didn’t believe that for one minute. The reason why Jared was an only child was directly tied to her remembering that I’d had cervical cancer.
She knew what she was doing, but I wasn’t going to waste time arguing with her either.
Like a lifesaving beacon, my phone began to dance and vibrate on the table.
*wedding rehearsal at 6:45*
“Wow, everyone will be here in a few for the wedding rehearsal. Those couple of hours flew by, huh? I’m gonna go upstairs and freshen up.” I pushed Amelia’s feet off of my lap and stood up.
“Darcy, really, I didn’t mean to—”
“It’s fine, Amelia,” I called over my shoulder.
But it wasn’t fine. Yes, I was blessed to have all of the things I had: parents that were able to pay for my education, a beautiful and intelligent son, a reputable business, a historic home, and the money to send my son and his new wife on a seven-day Caribbean honeymoon. And yes, I was grateful for those things, but I was also acutely aware of the things I didn’t have. Those things probably seemed like minor inconveniences to Amelia, who was pregnant with her fourth child and had a doting husband, and James, who was a self-proclaimed spinster who had no desire for either.
I sighed and closed the door to the master bathroom behind me. It was warmer up here on the second floor but not unbearable. Leaning over the sink, I checked my makeup. My foundation had started to break down a little bit, so I grabbed a few blotting papers to take care of the shiny spots and went over my whole face with a blending brush. My phone jangled and vibrated in my pocket, but it wasn’t a scheduled alert this time, so I pulled it out to see who it was.
A voice text from Tommy. I pushed play.
“Hey, um. I don’t know if this is out of bounds, but I just wanted to let you know that the moment that reminder for the rehearsal dinner came through, I thought about sitting with you in your study and holding your hand. And you with that look on your face like you wanted me to kiss you. Did you want me to kiss you? I should have just asked. Was that a missed opportunity?”
Yes, I’d wanted him to kiss me. Standing in the center of that space that always made me feel so calm and grounded with his arms around me and his hard length pressed into my belly as he whispered in my ear… Yes, I’d wanted that kiss. To be honest, I still wanted it. Wanted it just as much as I listened to him sigh in frustration about that missed opportunity.
“I hope…no, I need to know that I’ll get that opportunity again, Darcy. And when I said that you should make a list of things you want me to do to and for you? I was serious.” He chuckled and then sighed again. “I’ll see you in a few,” he said, then ended the message.
Then, like a lovesick girl, I played the whole thing again then saved it instead letting it disappear. Hm. This may be wrong. It may just be a thing that shouldn’t happen, shouldn’t be done. But there was no questioning the fact that the message from Tommy made me forget the bullshit. Without a second thought to how pathetic that was, I shoved my phone back into my pocket and went back downstairs.
Pastor Evans was the same minister who married Shannon and I and baptized Jared when he was twelve. My son thought it would be romantic to be married by a minister that had such a deep history with our family when anyone else would have seen it as a bad omen to be married by the same minister as their divorced parents.
Bless his heart.
“Mrs. MacFarland—”
“Ms.,” I corrected, maybe a bit too harshly. “It’s Ms. now.”
“Oh, yes. Right,” the pastor said with a solemn nod. “I haven’t seen your beautiful face in our pews as of late. You’re looking well.”
“Thank you, Pastor Evans! And yeah, I’ve been attending Music of Life. Shannon and his extended family have always had Our Lady of Mercy as their church home, and I just thought it would easier if it stayed that way. I didn’t want to cause any problems.” Shannon and I may have been married for years, but his family had never been very welcoming to me. I didn’t see a need to continue to perform niceties once he was gone.
“Totally understandable,” he said with another solemn nod. “So, Jared’s getting married. Time really flies!”
“It sure does.” We were standing next to the self-serve bar, and I took this moment to make myself another drink — whiskey neat because why even bother playing around at this point? Two more days of this painful small talk. Fucking torture.
Then Tommy’s fine ass stepped through the French doors onto the lower level piazza with Jared and the other boys in tow. He searched the yard, and when his gaze landed on me, he gave me a smile that I felt between my legs.
“Oh, look! There’s Jared now. Come here and say hello to Pastor Evans, son!”
Jared greeted the Pastor, then found Brandi and roped her into the conversation. Tommy gave me a wanton look that paired well with his smile and pulled me aside.
“You saved my voice text,” he murmured.
“I liked your voice text. Of course, I saved it,” I whispered back.
“Oh,” he said softly, a surprised yet bashful look on his face. “Is this bourbon?” he asked, pointing at my glass.
“Yeah, you want me to make you one?”
“No, it’s hot out, and I’ve probably had enough already between brunch and the tux shop. I’ll take a sip of yours, though.”
With a smirk, I passed him the glass, and when he took it, he let his fingers brush against mine on the chilled glass. Why was that so fucking erotic? Holding hands, brushing fingers, long embraces… It felt like I was in a movie set in the antebellum South, and Tommy had come a-courtin’.
Well, sorta… Except for the fact I was a fifty-five-year-old Black woman, and he was a thirty-two-year-old Mexican-American, but it felt soft and sort of innocent in the dirtiest way possible.
“So…” he began while slowly bringing my glass of chilled bourbon to his lips. “Did you start that list yet?”
Now it was my turn to blush and look bashful. “Not yet, but I’ve been giving it some thought.”
“Hm,” he hummed, holding the bourbon in his mouth for a moment before swallowing. “You know I meant an actual list, right?”
“An annotated series of actionable items? Or will a bullet-pointed email do?” I asked.
“Either, but I want you to make it and send it to me. I like lists. I like instruction. I do well with directions. Very well.” His lips quirked into a secret grin. “Should I keep an eye out for it?”
“Um…”
I looked around us at the members of my family and the wedding party milling around my yard. Could they see the attraction between us? Because it felt as real and physical to me as a hand on my pussy.
“How detailed do you want me to be?” I stammered.
Tommy could barely contain his glee as he stepped in close enough to place a hand on my hip and whisper in my ear. “All of them. All of the fine lines, the hash marks, and the layers that hide beneath them. Every secret you’ve ever kept and every Fibonacci sequence it will take to unlock them. I want all of the details, Darcy. All of them.” He placed a quick, secret kiss on my neck. “Now laugh like I just said something hilariously lewd,” he said, squeezing my hip before he backed away.
“Tommy!” I gasped in feigned surprise and gave him a little shove.
He stumbled away from me, putting on a wolfish grin. “I’m just sayin’, whenever you’re ready, we can play Me & Mrs. Jones.”
“Wow, Tomás,” Scott said. “What happened to ‘don’t talk to or about Ms. MacFarland that way’?”
Tommy turned his attention to Scott, and a frown darkened his brow. “Those instructions were specifically for you, Scott. And they still apply.”
Scott sneered. “You really think you’re better than me now, don’t you? Got a little money, nicer clothes, a little attention from the ladies—”
“Fellas!” Jared said, wedging himself between the two of them. “Let’s get this thing started. Hey, Rev!” He called over his shoulder. “Let’s run everyone through this a time or two before it’s time for dinner, huh?”
Pastor Evans shook his head at being called Rev but fell in step behind the weddi
ng party to make his way to the side yard.
It was customary for the father of the groom to escort his wife to her seat before the ceremony. Tommy filled in for him, which wasn’t uncustomary. The task filled him with delight that he didn’t even bother to try to conceal.
When Brandi’s father walked her down the aisle, that strange unnamable feeling I had earlier made my throat tight with emotion again. What was that? It wasn’t sadness because I was truly happy for my son, but…it was something akin to that. Grief, maybe?
I cleared my throat and wiped away an errant tear. The motion drew Tommy’s attention.
“You okay?” he mouthed.
I nodded and wiped away another tear, which didn’t do much to convince him that I was. Disregarding my dismissal, he came over, handed me a real goddamn handkerchief, and sat next to me.
“Where do you even buy handkerchiefs anymore?” I asked with a wet laugh as I dabbed at the corners of my eyes.
“The same place you buy any sort of men’s accessories. They aren’t all that rare.”
“And you just happen to have one on you right now?”
He shrugged, then took my hand in his. “I figured it would be handy for a situation such as this. I’m at your service, remember?”
I chuckled wetly. “Yeah, I remember.”
His thumb stroked the center of my palm gently, and while the touch was still innocent, I felt it in not-so-innocent places.
“Tomás?” Pastor Evans called. “This is the part where you present the rings. It’s a very important part of the ceremony. I’ve had best men miss their cue in the past—”
“I hear you, Rev,” Tommy grumbled, giving my hand a squeeze, then went to stand next to Jared to hand over the rings.
“Man,” James said, plopping gracelessly into the seat next to me. “What did you do to that boy to get him so sprung on you?”
“Sprung? On me? Nothing! And he’s not sprung, so I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Mmmhmm, like hell, you don’t.” James propped her feet up on the chair in front of her. “He’s always had a thing for you, but I’ve been watching him watch you, and I can see that it’s on a whole new level now. So, either you fucked him, or you’re thinking about it. Which is it?”
If She Says Yes Page 8