I opened the door, numbly stepping out of the truck. “Meg! I’m surprised to see you. I thought you were getting married today.”
I looked at the house next to mine and saw Larry, my neighbor, standing by his mailbox. “Just have to find something,” I called. I walked around to the back of the house since the front porch was no more, and I didn’t think I could hoist my ass up the three-foot drop off up to the front door.
Everything looked the same except it was all covered with a thin layer of snow that was now falling heavier. It all looked the same, but it didn’t feel like it. It felt like my whole world had been tipped upside down, and I just realized that I didn’t know what the hell was going on and who I was.
I stomped up the steps of the back porch, unlocked the door and dropped my coat on the floor. I waited to hear the sound of Blue coming to greet me but remembered he was at the clubhouse. Hell, my dog didn’t even seem like he was mine anymore. He was always out in the garage with Lo or sleeping on the couch in the common room.
The kitchen chair skidded across the floor as I pulled it out and sat down. The clock on the stove said one o’clock. It was two hours until I was supposed to get married. I looked down at my clothes and laughed, wondering if Lo would marry me in my chuck’s and jeans. That was one thing that hadn’t changed. I still dressed the same.
I heard a car pull up in my driveway, not surprised that someone was already here. When I had left the salon, my phone had rung non-stop until I had turned it off. When I got to my house, I had left it in my truck, not wanting to turn it on.
I thought twice about getting up and locking the back door, but I knew if it were Lo, it wouldn’t matter. He had the keys to the house. I didn’t know what I was going to do or say. I didn’t know what I was feeling other than I felt like I had lost myself again. When Lo and I had met, I knew who I was and what I wanted. Now I felt like I was doing the same thing I had done with Hunter. Losing myself in a man again.
The door to the car slammed shut, and I counted the seconds till I heard the back door open. I closed my eyes, not wanting to go through this. Wishing I could just disappear and not have to figure out everything that was swirling around in my head.
I heard the chair across from me scrape across the floor and then someone sat down. That someone was Lo, but I was praying it was Cyn or Troy. They talked me out of my last stupid crisis. I just hoped that I was that lucky this time.
“I love you.” His words crashed into me, tearing me apart. He went straight to the words that would bring me down.
“I know,” I whispered. A tear streaked down my face and fell on my jeans.
“Do you love me?”
I nodded my head yes because I couldn’t deny it. That wasn’t why we were here, though. I didn't doubt my love for Lo, I was afraid I was going to get lost again.
“Then you wanna tell me why I get a phone call from Cyn, who was hysterical that you ran off, and she had no idea where you were?” I shook my head no because the reason I ran wouldn’t make sense to him. It hadn’t made sense to Cyn or Gwen, so why would it make sense to him? “God dammit, Meg.”
I opened my eyes and my eyes landed on him as he ran his fingers through his hair. He looked as handsome as ever. Jet black hair, green eyes that always reminded me of fresh cut grass and the most handsome face I had ever seen. He was my Lo. “I don’t read anymore.”
“I know in your head what you said makes perfect fucking sense, but out here in the real world, you’re going to have to back it up and tell me what the hell that means.”
I dashed away the tears that were falling with the back of my hand. “I use to come home from work every night, fall into bed and read until either my eyes got tired, or my Kindle would whack me in the face because I fell asleep.” It sounded ridiculous, but it was true. Usually, I’d fall asleep, and my Kindle would fall out of my hands, waking me up and letting me know it was time to get to bed.
“Babe, I’m still not following what the hell that has to do with you and me getting married.”
“I don’t do that anymore. Hell, I couldn’t even remember the last book I had read when Cyn and Gwen asked.”
“Babe, then fucking read.”
He said it like it was so easy. “But I can’t. Not when I come home. You’re either waiting up for me or wake up as soon as my keys hit the door. We fall into bed, you fuck me until I can’t think straight and I fall asleep.”
“I don’t see one fucking problem with the last thing you said.”
“The problem is I love to read, and I can’t do it. It was my escape from life and reality. I could be a librarian who falls for the local rodeo star, the girl who’s terrified of living but somehow falls into local MC and ends up someone’s ol’ lady–”
“Now that shit happened to you, why the fuck do you need to read about it when it's going on around you?” Lo cut me off and stood up. “Meg, you wanna read when you get home from work?” I nodded my head yes. “Then fucking read!” He boomed throwing his hands up in the air.
“It’s more than reading, Lo. I don’t know who I am anymore. I figured out who I was before we got together, but now I’ve lost her again. Don’t you see? I’m not Meg, I’m King’s ol’ lady.”
“Damn fucking straight that’s a part of who you are, but you’re still the same woman I met six months ago, and I wouldn’t change one damn thing about you.”
“But it feels different.”
“Because it fucking is! You think that having a man and a shit ton more friends isn’t going to change things around you? But that don’t mean you fucking change! Hell, Meg. You’re stuck in your damn head with all that bullshit swirling around again, aren’t you?”
“It’s not shit!” I wailed.
“It fucking is,” he growled, getting in my face. “I love you with everything I am. I know that my life has changed and, hell, even I have fucking changed since I met you, but I wouldn’t want it any other fucking way. You’re mine,” he bit off.
“But I’m losing myself in you. I can’t do that to myself again. It’ll destroy us.”
“Meg, I’m so fucking wrapped up in you that I have no idea where I end and where you begin. I lost myself to you the second I saw you bent over in that damn store, waving your ass at me. That same store that every time when I drive by, I thank God he brought you into my life. I have been looking for you all my life, and I am not about to let you go because you think you’ve lost yourself because you don’t read anymore. You can fucking read and be God damn married to me! It happens every fucking day in marriages across America!”
“You don’t get it,” I whined, plopping down into my chair.
Lo looked up at the ceiling and shook his head. “I get it, Meg. I get it more than you think. What happened to you when you were married to Hunter happened because you two didn’t love each other anymore. Not because you lost yourself. You both stayed for as long as you did because you had a kid together.” I closed my eyes and dropped my head. I hated that he knew that. I stayed in a loveless marriage because I was afraid to leave and thought that it was best for my son. “Meg,” he called. I didn’t want to open my eyes. He grabbed my hands, and I felt him kneel down in front of me. “Open those beautiful eyes, babe,” he coaxed.
“I don’t know what to say, Lo.” I opened my eyes and Lo reached up, wiping the tears from my face.
“Do you love me?”
Such an easy question. “Yes.”
“Then why are you running from me?”
“Because I’m scared,” I whispered. “I’m afraid I’ll drive you away. That after a while you’ll get sick of me and then I’ll be alone again, not knowing who I am. I need to keep a part of me, so I know what to do when you leave.”
He sighed and shook his head. “I’m not going anywhere, Meg. Never. If I didn’t want to be with you every second, I wouldn’t have asked you to marry me. I would have just kept things like they were and never taken things to the next level. You wanna know why I never want
to leave?” I shrugged my shoulders, not knowing why he didn’t want to leave. “Because you make me whole. You make me the person I’ve wanted to be all of my life. I have a purpose when I wake up in the morning. You gave my life the meaning I’ve been searching for forever. You’re. Mine.”
My heart soared when I heard those words, knowing what he was saying was the truth, but I was still afraid. “I love you so much.”
“Then marry me. Today.”
I shook my head no and looked away. Fairy Tales weren’t real, and the story that Lo was weaving was fairytale to the core.
He cupped my chin and turned my head to look at him. “Meg, I can’t promise that our life is going to be perfect, and we’ll never argue or fight. But I can guarantee that I’ll always love you and that my place will always be next to you.”
“You’ll catch me when I fall? You’ll be there when I make a fool of myself? You’ll never leave, even when there might be something better out there for you? You’ll stay?” I loved this man with everything I had, and I was terrified that he didn’t love me back the same way. It was easy to say that you loved someone. It was showing it that became hard, but that was where all of the proof was.
“I’ll never let you fall, Meg, except into my arms. I love when you make a fool of yourself because that’s when I know I have the real Meg. The one who isn’t afraid of what others think. The Meg, who would lay her life down for her son and friends. The Meg that makes me whole.”
I leaned into his touch, letting his words sink in. “That includes you, too.”
“What?”
“I’d lay my life down for you, too,” I confided.
He leaned forward, his head resting against my forehead, his eyes locked with mine. “Will you marry me?”
Tears clouded my eyes again, but this time, because Lo still wanted to marry me. “I can’t promise the shit swirling in my head will ever stop.”
“As long as if you feel like you have to run, you run to me, I’ll be there to quiet that shit.”
“You’re not supposed to see me on our wedding day. It’s bad luck.”
“As long as I have you, I don’t care about bad luck. Marry me?”
“Your mom is going to be mad that you saw me.”
“I don’t care. I had to make sure my bride makes it down the aisle. Marry me?”
“How long until we can move back into my house?”
“You’re ignoring my question.”
“No, I’m just prolonging my answer. When can we move back home?”
“As long as you keep calling it our home, we can be in by the end of January. Marry me?”
I pushed on his shoulders, and he sat back on his heels. I slid out of my chair and knelt in front of him. “Yes,” I whispered, wrapping my arms around his neck. “Yes, I’ll marry you.”
“It’s about damn time,” he whispered against my lips. His lips melted against mine, his tongue sweeping in, tasting and promising forever. Lo raised up, kicking his legs out from under him and he sat down on his ass and pulled me into his lap. “How long is it going to take you to get ready?”
“Ready for what?” I mumbled against his neck.
“To get in your dress and all that shit?”
“Hmm, probably an hour.”
“Good, because you’re mine for the next forty-five minutes.”
“I like the sound of that,” I purred, pushing him back to lay down. His hands grabbed my ass, pulling me down with him. “We’ve never done it on the kitchen floor before.”
“I think you’re right, babe. We’re going to have to fix that.” My fingers delved into his hair as my lips crashed down on his and his hands roamed over my body, pulling my shirt up.
“Jesus.”
Lo and I froze, his hands on my bare back and our lips sealed together.
“Holy fuck. I told you we should have knocked louder.”
Lo and I opened our eyes, and we knew that Gravel and Ethel were standing in my kitchen while Lo had his hands up my shirt and I was two seconds away from being topless.
“Well, how was I supposed to know they would be on the kitchen floor? Cyn told me Meg was a damn runaway bride.”
“Well, it looks like King managed to talk some sense into her.”
“You do know that we can hear you, right?” Lo asked.
“Well I would fucking hope so,” Gravel chuckled.
“I bet this was some harebrained idea you two cooked up so you could see her before the wedding, isn’t it, Lo?” Ethel questioned.
I sat up and rolled off Lo. “Um, I wish I could say that was true, but I actually did run.”
“Well, I assume since you two were just about to screw on the floor that everything is under control. Let’s get out of here, darlin’.” Gravel reached for Ethel’s hand, but she sidestepped him, shooing her hand at him.
“Nonsense. I’ll ride with Meg back to Gwen’s, and you two can ride back in my car. Besides, the less these two see each other, the better.”
“Ma. I think all that bad luck shit is just that, shit. Meg and I can ride back together.” Lo stood up and wrapped his arm around my waist. “We’ll be there in an hour.” Even after being busted by his mom, Lo still had plans for us. I liked the way he was thinking.
Ethel grabbed my hand and pulled me out of Lo’s arms. “Nope. Not happening. Meg needs to get ready and so do you. Gwen is all set up at the clubhouse to do your hair. I called her as soon as we saw that you and Lo were here.”
“But… Ethel… I want to…” She dragged me to the door and grabbed my coat off of the floor.
“No buts. Keep it in your pants until after the wedding, Lo,” Ethel scolded. She threw open the door, her hand still grasping my arm and pulled me out the door and down the stairs.
I glanced up the stairs to see Lo and Gravel standing at the top of the stairs, both of them smirking. “Ethel, at least let the girl put her coat on,” Gravel called.
“I’ll crank the heat up in the truck. She’ll be fine.” She opened up the driver’s door of my truck, pushing me in and slammed the door shut as soon as my butt was in the door. I couldn’t see Lo anymore, but I’m sure he was laughing his ass off. Who would have thought on my wedding day I would be busted making out with my groom by my future mother-in-law who then drags me out of my house like a naughty child.
“Start it up. Let’s go,” Ethel ordered as she slid into the passenger seat.
“I don’t have keys, Ethel. You dragged me out of the house so fast, I didn’t have time to think much less grab my purse,” I said, looking over at her.
A smile spread across her lips, and she pointed over my shoulder. I looked out my side window to see Lo standing there, my keys dangling from his fingertips. I cranked down the window and reached for my keys.
He snatched them away before I could grasp them. “Only if you promise not to run again. I planned on making you dazed, and compliant before my Mom showed up. Now I have to rely on your word that you’ll be walking down the aisle.”
“I promise.” I reached for keys, sticking half of my body out of the window, but he still wouldn’t give them to me. He leaned forward, his lips brushing against mine.
“Lo, give her the damn keys. I’ll make sure she’s there.” I felt Ethel lean over the seat, and she flailed her hand out my window at Lo, shooing him away.
“Alright, alright,” Lo laughed, handing me my keys. I grabbed the keys, sticking them in the ignition and cranking up the truck. “Make sure she gets there, Ma. No detours,” Lo called as he stepped back from the truck and crossed his arms over his chest.
“Straight to the clubhouse. That’s it,” Ethel promised. I rolled up the window, giving Lo a little finger wave. I shifted the truck into reverse, backing out of the driveway and headed to the clubhouse.
“Still can’t believe you ran, hun. I thought for sure Cyn was losing her mind when she called me,” Ethel mumbled.
“I was stupid. I wasn’t thinking clearly. I’m good now, though,” I promis
ed. And I was.
Lo was right. I had changed, but it was for the better. Sure, I didn’t read anymore, but the main reason I did read was to escape my crap life. When I was with Hunter, I would devour at least seven books a week, if not more. Now, I didn’t need that escape. Now I had Lo.
“Well, I’m not letting you run away again,” Ethel mumbled.
I could have argued with her, telling her she didn’t need to watch guard over me, but I just let her keep talking.
I knew that nothing was going to keep me from walking down the aisle to Lo and starting our lives together.
In less than two hours, I was about to become Mrs. Birch, and there wasn’t a damn thing in this world that was going to stop me.
_________
Chapter 26
Lo
“Pussy whipped.”
“Definitely.”
Demon and Rigid were standing in the office of the shop, looking at each other and shaking their heads. After forty-five minutes of bitching and moaning about wearing a tux, we were ready to get this wedding on the road.
“You only have to wear it for the ceremony, and then I don’t care what the fuck you wear.” I straightened my tie and grabbed my cuff links off the stack of papers on the desk. “How the fuck do I put these on?” I was beginning to get a little fed up with this tux, too.
“Give ‘em here,” Gravel grumbled, pushing off the wall and holding his hand out to me. I dropped them in his hand and held my arm out as he worked magic.
“Y’all should see Slider. He just rolled up with Fayth, and he looks like he got kicked in the nuts. Bastard looks fucking miserable,” Gambler chuckled, leaning against the door frame.
“He’s miserable because he hasn’t been able to get his dick wet since King put him on Fayth duty.” Demon straightened his tie and sat down in the chair behind my desk. “You’re torturing the guy.”
I shrugged my shoulders, not caring. “Someone had to watch Fayth. He can suck it up and take one for the club.” Gravel finished with one arm and grabbed the other. “Besides, Leo will be in town for at least a week, so Slider will have a break from her for a bit.”
Devil’s Knights MC Box Set 2 Page 32