It felt unreal. I left her with the silver pistol, only as a precaution. Edward had been jerky and confused since reanimation, but not violent. Now, as I gazed at Edward sleeping quietly in Valentina’s bed, I couldn’t believe the Beast had ever even existed.
We’re more alike than you want to admit, he had once whispered.
I shivered with the memory. Not anymore, I told myself.
I collapsed on my bed, thoroughly exhausted by the procedure. My fingers ached in a delicious way, and I stretched and popped my knuckles as I’d seen farmers do after a hard day’s work threshing. As I drifted off, I wondered if Father had fallen asleep at night this satisfied. I doubted he had. After all, he’d never accomplished his goal to create the perfect creature.
I had.
In the morning, I woke to knocking. My first thoughts flew to Edward upstairs in the attic, and I scrambled out of bed and threw open the door, only to find a half dozen excited faces staring at me. Lily and Moira and the little girls crowded into my room, grinning from ear to ear.
“Today is your wedding!” they squealed, bustling into the room with combs and soaps and piles of ivory ribbon and lace. I watched them in a daze, a hand to my head, trying to calm my racing heart.
“How wonderful of you all to come help me,” I said, in an attempt to pass off my shock as jitters. “I just . . . need to check on something for a moment. I’ll be right back.”
I gazed in the direction of the stairs leading to Valentina’s room, but Moira clucked her tongue and shook her head. “Oh, no, no running off for you today. McKenna wants to hold the ceremony right at sunset, when the moors are at their prettiest, and you’ve slept so late we don’t have much time to get you ready.” She looked over my bare feet and frowned. “First things first: a bath!”
I protested, desperate to slip upstairs for just a peek to make sure everything was all right with Edward, but they wouldn’t hear of it. They dunked me in steaming water, scrubbed me with rose-scented soap, and slathered my hair with precious oils, only to dry me off and check my fingernails and do it all over again. By the time we finished in the bath, my skin was the consistency of a prune and my stomach was rumbling.
Back in my room, Lily threw open the curtains and started to air out the corset and underclothes I would wear beneath my wedding dress.
“Look at that sun,” she said, even though the sky was mottled with clouds. “I told you the storm would break, eh? But the vicar sent a note he can’t make it. Had too much to drink last night, the rumor is.”
“McKenna’s offered to take his place presiding over the ceremony,” Moira added while raking her fingernails through my hair. “She can forge the vicar’s signature to all the official documents. It won’t be the first time, and he won’t mind.”
The girls spent the next hour toying with my curls and rubbing lotions into my hands and face, peppering me with compliments about what a beautiful bride I would be and speculating who would be next. Lily voted for Lucy, and Moira thought McKenna and Carlyle would discover they’d been passionately in love for years. When I suggested Elizabeth might marry, they only burst into laughter.
“Speaking of Lucy,” I said, managing to extricate myself from their primping, “I haven’t seen her yet today. I really should go find her.”
“She came down for breakfast,” Lily said. “Grabbed the entire basket of scones and ran back upstairs. Said she shouldn’t be disturbed.”
It wasn’t until McKenna called the younger girls down to help with the cooking that I was able to give Moira and Lily the slip and race up to the attic.
I knocked on Valentina’s door. “Lucy,” I whispered. “It’s me. How is he?”
She threw the door open and looked both ways to make sure I was alone, then pulled me into the room. Her entire face glowed as radiantly as mine, and she hadn’t used a single salve. It was amazing how sheer joy could transform a person.
“Ask him yourself,” she said with a grin.
EDWARD COULDN’T STOP STARING at his hands.
Lucy had helped him move from the bed to a reclining chair by the windows, and he sat upright as casually as any gentleman, though his skin was still clammy, and his muscles trembled as he took a glass of water that Lucy offered him. He drank it greedily.
“I keep expecting the claws,” he said in a rusty voice, clearing his throat. He held out his hand, flexing his fingers. “Even when I was in control of my body, I could still feel them. Now they’re just . . . gone.”
His brown eyes met mine. Not even a hint of gold in them.
“He’s gone too,” he added. “The Beast. I could always feel him before. Now there’s nothing.”
Lucy took the glass from him. He looked over with a smile and rested his hand over hers. “Lucy explained to me the basics of the procedure you performed, but I still have questions.”
“And I’ll answer them all,” I said. “But you should rest first. You’ve been through so much.”
He flexed his hands again, marveling at them. “All I’ve wanted is to be a normal person with a normal life. I didn’t know I just had to die first.”
I smiled. Even brought back from the dead, Edward had a sense of humor. Lucy grinned as well.
“As far as I’m concerned, you’re quite normal now,” I said. “Your breathing is slower, as is the rate of your blinks, but it’s nothing to be concerned about. Hensley’s levels are slower, too.”
“Hensley?” Edward asked.
“Oh—I forgot. You never met him.” I tactfully avoided mentioning that Hensley was the one who had ripped out the Beast’s heart. “Hensley is the professor’s son. You’ll meet him soon enough; he likes to crawl around in the walls and play with rats. He’s like you—brought back.”
Edward’s eyebrows raised. “There are more like me?”
“Only the two of you.”
His dark eyes shifted to mine. “Where’s Montgomery? He helped with the procedure, I imagine. I should very much like to thank him.”
Lucy and I exchanged a look, and when I didn’t answer straightaway, he guessed the truth. “He doesn’t know, does he? That’s why you have me hidden away up here.”
I leaned forward to take his clammy hand in my own freshly washed one. “Lucy and I brought you back ourselves. We’ll tell Montgomery soon, and he’ll be delighted. Today, though . . .” I glanced at Lucy again. Right now, Montgomery would be dressing in his suit, perhaps sharing a drink with Balthazar to calm his nerves. “Let me worry about what Montgomery thinks. You worry about getting used to being alive again. Now, open your mouth. I want to run a few more tests.”
I prodded Edward with a metal tongue depressor, then checked inside his ears and nose, and jotted everything down in a notebook at my side. On something of a whim, I handed him the tongue depressor. “Take this. See if you can bend it.”
He raised an eyebrow. “It’s made of steel.”
“Humor me.”
He took the metal depressor in both hands and gave it a slight jerk, no more effort than breaking a matchstick, but it bent like it was hinged in the middle. I stifled a gasp.
“Unnatural strength. I’m not surprised. All humans have powerful latent strength, but normal bodies are conditioned to respect limits so we don’t harm ourselves. Because of your condition, you can’t harm yourself, so your body doesn’t register those usual warnings.”
“Can’t harm myself?” he asked, confused. “I thought I was normal now.” His dark eyes found mine. From the day he’d washed up on the Curitiba, all Edward had ever wanted was a normal life.
“You’re better than normal now,” Lucy said tactfully. “You can’t die.”
This news made him stand up anxiously, but the effort was too much and he had to sit back down. “How do you know this?”
“Hensley is the same way,” I explained.
He rubbed a hand over his face. There was a heaviness to the lines around his eyes and mouth that hadn’t always been there. I could imagine a small part of wha
t he was going through—when I’d cured myself in London, the wracking pain in my joints was gone overnight. My hands—like Edward’s now—were mercifully still. Cured. And yet the Beast had seen straight through my supposed cure.
“Lucy, could you give us a moment alone?”
She hesitated only a second. “Of course.” She left the room, closing the door behind her.
Maybe the serum cured your physical afflictions, the Beast had said, but it didn’t cure the illness of your soul.
“I can’t imagine what you feel like,” I said softly. “But I hope you don’t hate me for bringing you back.”
He looked up from his hands. “Hate? No, I could never hate you. I know my feelings for you were rash when we first met. I had only been alive a few months, and you were the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. It’s taken some time to understand what loving a person truly means.” His head turned in the direction Lucy had gone. “Sometimes it must grow. And sometimes it’s quieter, less expected, not like how they describe in books.”
He turned back to me, looking more serious. “I’m grateful you’ve given me a second chance, though I’ll always be an experiment, won’t I? An aberration. Something made in a laboratory.”
I knew what it meant to be an aberration, but I’d never longed for a normal life like Edward had. I’d dreamed of an exceptional life for as long as I could remember. Ambitious, just like Father.
“Can I ask you a question?” I drummed my fingers nervously against my knees. He nodded. “After the Beast took over your body, he told me that I should be wary of Montgomery. That he had burned some files and a letter that my father had written to me.” I swallowed. “Do you know what he meant?”
Edward rubbed his eyes. “I’m afraid I don’t. When you cut the Beast out of my head, you cut out his memories, too. I might have known once, but not any longer.”
I let out a heavy breath. “I shouldn’t have even asked.”
“Montgomery is a good man, Juliet.” I looked up in surprise, and the corner of Edward’s mouth pulled back in a smile, though the movement seemed to pain him. “Even if he did try to kill me a time or two. I know he was only defending you. He and I have had our differences, but I can recognize a good heart when I see it, and if my blood had to come from anyone, I’m glad it was from him. If Montgomery is keeping secrets from you, it’s for a good reason.”
I spun the ring on my finger slowly. “The reason I must keep you secret today—it’s because Montgomery and I are getting married. After the ceremony, once things have calmed down and we are certain you’re well, I shall tell him everything.”
Edward nodded slowly at the mention of my wedding, unsurprised, and I wondered if Lucy had already told him or if he simply was too exhausted for strong reactions. He had loved me passionately once, but that time had slipped away sometime between his death and rebirth.
“I’m glad,” he said. “You deserve to be happy.”
I paused. “So do you.”
Lucy opened the door, peeking her head in and giving me a smile. “All the girls are downstairs looking for you, Juliet. It’s time to put on your dress.”
THIRTY
I HAD NEVER BEEN the sort of girl who dreamed of her wedding day. Instead, I had spent my childhood poring over biology books and stealing glimpses through the keyhole into my father’s laboratory. Marriage had felt so far off back then. The only man in my life who mattered had been my father.
I sat alone at the vanity table in my bedroom, looking in the mirror, a bouquet of dusky dried heather from Valentina’s herb collection at my side. The girls had rubbed rouge on my cheeks and powdered my entire face and pulled my hair up in a formal Highland twist.
A knock came at the door.
I nearly dropped the heather. “Come in.”
Elizabeth stepped into the room. She’d changed out of the simple muslin dresses she wore most days into one of her silk gowns from London. She sat beside me on the dressing bench and fixed a loose pin in my hair. I wondered what my mother would have thought of me. Had she ever imagined my wedding day? If she were here, would she hold me tight and tell me she was proud of the woman I’d become?
“There now.” Elizabeth smoothed down a curl. “You look lovely.”
I touched the dried bouquet of heather delicately. There had been a man once—one of Mother’s clients—who bought her a china set with a heather pattern. I must have been thirteen years old at the time. Mother loved fine china, but she’d sold the set to buy me an elegant dress.
There’s only one way out of this life for you, Juliet, she had said. In a few years you’ll need to find a respectable young man. Wealthy. From a good family. Charm him, make him fall in love with you, and never, ever tell him who you really are.
Montgomery wasn’t from a respectable family, nor was he wealthy. But he loved me despite my faults, and I loved him despite his.
Elizabeth helped me undo the ties of my robe and carefully slipped the dress over my head. I’d expected it to be stiff with newness, but it was soft as silk. As Elizabeth knelt to adjust the hem, a stray pin from the bouquet stuck my finger and a bead of blood appeared. My strength wavered. Was love enough? What would Montgomery do when he discovered Edward hiding away in the attic?
“Are you nervous?” Elizabeth asked.
“Yes, a bit,” I confessed. “It’s difficult to know what the future will hold.”
She gave me a sympathetic smile. “Whatever comes, you’ll weather it. Besides, whatever happens can’t be as bad as poor Victor Frankenstein’s wedding night, can it? There’s only room enough in this house for one cursed wedding tale. I promise you—no murders, no attacks, no monsters lurking in the shadows. Now smile, and marry that man.”
I took a deep breath and nodded. Elizabeth squeezed my hand. The door opened and Balthazar stuck his head in. He wore an old black sash tied around his neck in a bow, since all of the formal wear was too small for him.
He stood at attention. “We’re ready, miss.”
BALTHAZAR LED ME DOWN the stairs. With my arm in his, we stepped out of the glass-encased winter solarium into the south garden, where the servants gathered around an altar of winter greenery. Montgomery stood at the front. His hair was combed back, his hands clasped in front of him. As far back as I could remember, he had always been in my life. Now he always would be.
I had taken him for granted back when I’d been a foolish girl in awe of my father, but I wasn’t foolish anymore. I was keeping Edward secret from him, but he was keeping secrets, too. In time, everything would come out, and we would lay ourselves bare and make amends. We had years for that.
I took another step, the lace hem sweeping the ground. Lily and Moira whispered to each other about how lovely my dress was. I spotted little Annabelle in the back, standing on tiptoe to see until Carlyle picked her up and set her on his shoulder.
I squeezed Balthazar’s arm. “I’m sorry again about last night. I hope you can forgive me. There’s no one I’d rather give me away than you.”
“It’s all right, miss,” he said somberly. “Just remember your promise. After the wedding, you must tell him.”
He stood straighter, taking his duties seriously. I was in awe of him. No human could forgive and forget so easily.
Lucy stood to the side of the wedding party, dressed in a purple gown with Edward’s pocket watch glinting around her neck, no longer a sign of his death but of his life. She caught my eye and gave me a reassuring smile to say that everything was all right with him, and then raised a fiddle and started playing a reel. I had forgotten she could play. The music was beautiful. Overhead, the sinking sun found breaks in the clouds and cast a golden-colored light over the wedding party. Balthazar led me toward the altar.
“Montgomery says we shall live here, at the estate,” Balthazar whispered to me. “He said this will be our home forever.”
My stomach clenched. It reminded me of when I’d fled Father’s island, when I’d known we had to leave Balthazar behi
nd even though it broke my heart. I squeezed his arm harder, reassuring myself that I’d never have to make a choice that difficult again. “Of course we shall.”
He grinned, and we walked the rest of the way to the wedding party. Balthazar patted my arm and then moved to stand next to Lucy. She gave his hand a squeeze, and he beamed.
Montgomery came to stand beside me. I could feel his presence like warm sunshine, my mind racing to take all this in, the flowers and the clouds overhead and his hands clasped behind his back.
“Dearly beloved,” McKenna began.
She continued through prayers I’d heard at the few weddings I’d attended when I was younger. I didn’t care about the words, the same words spoken at all weddings. What I cared about was capturing the parts of today that wouldn’t last forever in the pages of a book: the rolling moors behind us, the single strand of hair that fell into Montgomery’s eyes, the anxious way his fingers flexed, betraying his excitement. Lucy holding Balthazar’s hand. Sharkey sitting at Moira’s feet with a bit of twine fastened to his leather collar as a leash. The wind still carried the smell of the storm, and it blew harder, ruffling my dress and making the windmill churn fast. I wanted to remember every moment. Most of all, I wanted to remember Montgomery.
I reached out to hold his hand. I knew it was untraditional for the bride and groom to touch during the ceremony, but we’d given up formalities long ago.
McKenna asked for the ring, and we made our promises to each other, and Montgomery slipped the ring over my finger.
“You may kiss the bride,” she said.
Montgomery placed a chaste kiss on my lips that lit a fire within me. I fought the urge to throw my arms around him and never let go.
“I’m sorry this wedding has to come at so difficult a time,” he whispered. “So soon after Edward’s funeral. But I love you, and I always will.”
I tried to show no reaction; for all I knew, Edward might be in the attic even now, looking down on us. I glanced that way but the sun was reflecting on the upper windowpanes, obscuring whatever was behind them. I told myself it was a good thing—Edward was back with us, and in time perhaps he and Lucy would be standing where I was now, the past forgotten, and the four of us could share in the management of Ballentyne.
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