by L. V Russell
I couldn’t bear to think what she would do, knowing how she hunted us, wanted me dead…to put all that pain and fear onto a child was unthinkable. A sick feeling settled deep in my stomach.
Charlotte rummaged high upon her shelves, passing me a vial of a rose-coloured liquid. “Take this every nightfall. Do not forget.”
“I won’t,” I said, tucking the bottle into my pocket, wondering if there was anything at all she did not have a potion for. “What do I do now?”
“Sit and wait for him to come back to you,” Charlotte answered gently, tidying away the bottles and jars I had helped her fill, extinguishing the burners with her fingertips.
“And if he doesn’t?” The words pushed past my mouth, a question I didn’t want to know the answer to. I didn’t want to know the probability of losing him, if there was a chance that the time we had together was all there ever would be.
Charlotte said nothing, unable to give me the comfort I was seeking, but she did hand me the bowl of cold water and a fresh cloth, if only to give my hands something to do.
Chapter Twenty
Laphaniel woke four days later.
He had barely moved for the days and nights I watched over him, his fever burning so high that even Charlotte’s calm demeanour had faltered. I had done little more than sit and wait, only moving from his side to clean myself up. Charlotte had found fresh clothing for me, a shimmering gown of silver spider-silk.
Relief coursed through me when he opened his eyes, new tears trailing down my cheeks. I grasped at his hand, squeezing it tight before bringing it to my lips.
He blinked, squinting against the candlelight. He lifted a heavy hand to rub the sleep from his eyes, missed, and hit himself in the face instead. The pale lilac of his eyes shone bright but very confused. “Where am I?”
His voice was like gravel, rough and pained, but truthfully, I had never heard anything so beautiful in my life. It took me a moment to speak around my tears. “You’re safe.”
“Where?” he rasped.
I didn’t want to frighten him. “Underground in the Unseelie Court,” I began, pouring a glass of water. “Are you thirsty?”
He nodded, pushing himself up against the pillows, accepting the glass I passed to him gratefully. He drained it in one swallow.
“What’s the last thing you remember?” I asked, filling another glass. “Drink it slowly.”
Laphaniel ran a hand through his hair, pushing back the sweat-soaked strands, so it stood on end. He winced.
“I remember the carriage ride here,” Laphaniel began, taking a smaller sip of water. He narrowed his eyes while he thought. “Then there were big dogs… I think…I don’t know.”
“After that?”
He passed me the glass, sinking back into the pillows. “Nothing. I don’t know how I got here.”
It was a small mercy that he had no recollection of being dragged down to Charlotte’s quarters.
“You collapsed upstairs, poisoned by the wound you were hiding from me.” I couldn’t quite keep the anger from my voice. I wanted to hug him and never let go, and throttle him at the same time. “What the hell were you thinking?”
He stared up at me, and I sighed. He wasn’t awake enough for a scolding. With a clumsy hand, he gently touched the faint bruise left upon my skin, the teeth marks, barely visible.
“Did I bite you?”
“You did,” I began, “Don’t look so guilty, you were delirious and had no idea what you were doing.”
“Have you been here all night?”
I swallowed past the lump in my throat, feeling the weight of the long days waiting for him to open his eyes, the exhaustion settling over me like physical presence. “You’ve been unconscious for four days.”
“What?” He sat straighter, glancing around the room, and realising where he was.
“You’ve been really sick, Laphaniel. Charlotte saved your life…”
“Who?” His eyes widened, gaze dropping to the drip still strapped to his hand. I wasn’t quick enough to stop him from wrenching it out.
Laphaniel eyed the long glass needle, watching blood bubble up from the back of his hand. His face turned ashen, eyes suddenly rolling back as he slumped against the pillows.
“Did he just pull that out?” Charlotte appeared at his bedside, glaring at the new bloodstains on her sheets.
I shook him gently, “Laphaniel?”
“He is not the first knight to faint on me, I doubt he will be the last.” Charlotte tapped his cheek until he pushed her away. “They do not balk at bloodied wounds, coming to me with their insides hanging out, barely whimpering, then hit the floor when they see my needles.”
I stroked the filthy hair back from his face. “How are you feeling?”
Laphaniel flicked his gaze to me for just a moment, recoiling from the Spider leaning over him. Clawed hands lifted the bandages around his ribs before prodding the neat stitches over his skin. The mottled bruising had gone, the angry wound a raised mark that stretched eight inches across his stomach.
“Any pain there?”
Laphaniel tensed, giving her a quick shake of his head. “No.”
“Good,” Charlotte said, trailing claws up to his shoulder, before pressing the flat of her hand against his forehead. “Your fever has gone too. You will bear scars, a constant reminder that you are not invulnerable, you foolish boy.”
“Thank you,” I said to her as she slipped past, and she squeezed my shoulder gently.
“You can bathe in a moment,” Charlotte began. “The stitches are spider-silk and won’t mind the water. Wait until your head clears, or you’ll faint again.”
He waited until Charlotte had disappeared into the shadows before turning to me. “Teya?”
“Yes?”
“Where the hell are my clothes?”
“They were revolting,” I said with a little smile. “I really hope they’ve been burnt. If it makes you feel better, I was the one undressing you.”
He lifted the blankets to look at the mark over his stomach, the stitching so tiny I could barely see them. “I thought it would heal on its own.”
“But it didn’t.” My voice was firm. “You should have told me…I should have noticed. We could have stopped somewhere, anywhere. This didn’t need to happen. You need to damn well talk to me.”
“I know,” he admitted, looking lost. “I’m sorry.”
I wrapped my arms around him, pulling him close. “I love you so much, but don’t think for a moment I am done telling you off.”
“Please don’t yell at me just yet,” he murmured against my hair. “My head hurts.”
I squeezed him tighter, feeling his heart thump against my chest, strong and steady. I took a breath, wrinkling my nose.
“You smell disgusting.”
He pulled back, lips twitching into a gentle smile. “I feel disgusting.”
“Ready for that bath?”
He took my outstretched hand, accepting my help. “Oh, yes.”
Rough stone steps led into the bathing room, a circular space of carved rock with a small sunken pool in the centre. Candles filled the alcoves, the light catching the webbing above us. Fire pits crackled around the edge, smoke curling up and up through vents carved deep into the stone. There was a smell of incense mingling with the fire smoke, pungent and heavy though not unpleasant.
Laphaniel slipped into the greenish water, the steam billowing over the surface in waves of heat. I settled behind him, reaching for the washcloth on the side to run it over his bare shoulders and down his back. My toes curled at the low moan rising from his throat.
“I have missed you so much,” I breathed as he ducked his head under the water, washing the blood and filth from his hair. “You were someplace so far from here, and I couldn’t get to you.”
“I think I dreamt of you,” he said softly, closing his eyes when I soaped his hair, scrubbing the clumps of dried blood from the inky strands.
I watched the water take on a re
ddish tinge, making me want to take him into my arms and never let go. “You kept calling my name, but you wouldn’t believe I was there. It was awful, and I didn’t think I could feel any more helpless…but then you went quiet.”
I swallowed, sucking down a breath before I gently tipped his head back, pouring water over his hair to wash the bubbles out. He ran a hand over his face, slicking his hair back, the violet in his eyes shining brighter than before.
Warm fingers trailed over my face, his mouth brushed against my ear, mumbling words that held a hope so wondrous I feared I had heard them wrong.
“What did you say?”
He shifted in the pool, dark water lapping up over the edge, leaning so close I could almost taste the words. “Marry me.”
I blinked. “Charlotte gave you a lot of weird stuff, are you…”
“Marry me, Teya,” he repeated, huffing a laugh against my cheek, bringing his warm and soapy hands up to frame my face.
I swallowed. “You’re proposing to me, completely naked, in filthy bathwater?”
He grinned, wickedness dancing across his face that sent my heart leaping. I had missed that look. The smile faded, fingers coming up to brush the hair away from my eyes.
“I want you for whatever part of forever is granted to us,” he said, touching his forehead to mine. “I want to belong to you in a way that nobody can take away, and I want you to be mine. Marry me tonight, I don’t care where or how, I just want you.”
Tears of hope and joy slipped down my face and over Laphaniel’s fingers as he tried to wipe them away. I nodded against him, my answer barely a breath.
“Yes.”
His answering smile was radiant. He said nothing but took a deep breath before relaxing against the side of the pool, laying his head on my legs. I threaded my fingers through his, knowing exactly how good it felt to wash off old sweat and grime.
I was content to just sit by him, listening to the lapping of the water and crackle of flames, enjoying the comforting heat surrounding me. It felt good, and I was beginning to feel sleepy when Laphaniel’s head lolled back.
I caught him before he slipped further under the water, my heart a jackhammer in my chest. “Laphaniel!”
He jumped. “What?”
“Get out of the water before you drown yourself,” I snapped, keeping an arm around him. “I think we need to find you something to eat, and maybe some caffeine.”
“Hmm,” he breathed, nipping at my ear. “I can think of something better we could do.”
“I’m not getting into that water with you,” I said, extending a hand to help him up, watching the droplets slide down the planes of his stomach when he stood. I gestured to a wooden stool close by. “Sit down.”
He did as I told him, an eyebrow raised. I found a thick blanket and draped it around him, wrapping it tight. He let me coddle him, his head resting on my shoulder while I breathed him in, gently using the edge of the blanket to catch the cooling water from his face.
I passed him clean clothes Charlotte had left for him, watching him fumble over the buttons of his shirt.
He looked up with a scowl. “You’re laughing at me.”
With a smile itching at my mouth, I moved to help him. “I have never seen you clumsy before. Do you think you can manage your trousers by yourself?”
“Yes, thank you,” he replied, then struggled to get the correct leg in. “No, I can’t. Would you stop sniggering and help me?”
“You’re putting them on backwards.” I laughed, pulling the tangled clothes from his legs. “Hold on to me, that’s it, left leg, your other left, my love, and right leg.”
“My head feels foggy.”
“That’s what a coma will do to you,” I said, sweeping the wet hair from his face. “Come on, I bet you’re hungry.”
“Starving,” he replied, taking my hand as I led him out of the bathing room. I was relieved to find him already much steadier on his feet.
Charlotte was finishing putting clean sheets on the bed when we returned. She passed me a steaming cup of bitter tea and waited for Laphaniel to sit back down before giving him one.
“How are you feeling now?” Charlotte asked, creeping closer, not seeming to notice Laphaniel’s unease as she leant over him.
“Better…thank you.”
“He fell asleep in the bath.”
Laphaniel glared at me, while Charlotte came closer still, reaching out to tilt his head back, her face barely a breath away from his.
“Charlotte,” I began. “He doesn’t like that.”
“Hmmm,” she breathed, ignoring me to press a claw to his throat. “That would be the after-effects of the Wintersbreath. It will pass. Your heart is racing, though.”
“Likely because you’re looming over him.”
“Oh.” She patted Laphaniel’s cheek gently, an odd look of longing flickering over her otherworldly face. I knew it took everything he had not to flinch away from her—I really hoped she didn’t try to hug him. “I’ll get you something to eat.”
Charlotte moved away, the silks of her gown rustling when she slid off the bed, one pair of hands reaching to fill a bowl with a thick stew that had been left to bubble for hours.
She handed Laphaniel a bowl before passing one to me, along with a large chunk of fresh bread to dip in. I finished two bowlfuls before Laphaniel had finished his, using the bread to finish every last drop I could catch.
“Let that settle, and you can have more later,” Charlotte said, plucking Laphaniel’s half-eaten food away. He reached for the last piece of bread, and she slapped his hand away. “No more for you.”
“I’m hungry.”
“Good,” Charlotte hissed back. “And you can have some more when I am certain you won’t just bring it all back up again.”
“Laphaniel asked me to marry him,” I said to Charlotte. “Tonight.”
“Wait here,” the Spider replied, placing a quick, cold kiss to the back of my hands before she darted off, disappearing into the shadows with barely a sound.
“Where is she going?” Laphaniel asked, looking uneasy.
“I have no idea.” I shrugged, sensing his fear. “She would have eaten us by now if she was going to.”
“If you say so.”
Laphaniel hissed a curse as Charlotte emerged from the shadows ahead. She skittered down the wall, her claws scraping the stone. The Spider settled beside him, and he flinched.
“I’ll get up,” Laphaniel said, but Charlotte’s quick hands grasped his arm.
“You will stay where I put you,” she said sharply, another set of hands revealing a small box. “These are for you both.”
She handed the box to Laphaniel, who glanced at me before taking it. I leant closer, and he flicked the clasp, revealing two rings nestled inside.
Candlelight embraced the near-white rings, catching the tiny fragments of blue and silver held within. My hand hovered over the smaller of the two, not needing to touch it to feel the soft chill it gave.
“We can’t take these,” Laphaniel began, meeting Charlotte’s eyes as she slowly twisted her head to him. “This is dragon stone, it’s priceless.”
“They’re yours.”
For the first time, Laphaniel kept the Spider’s gaze. “Why?”
“Because I have no use for them anymore,” she answered. “Because this world needs more dreamers.”
Charlotte closed the lid of the box, her long fingers hovering over the two rings inside for just a moment before the lid clicked shut.
“There is a creature down by the western lake,” she said, folding her claws onto her lap. “The one furthest from the castle. For a small token, he may perform the ceremony. He is an ancient thing, older than some of the gods that still like to linger. He likes to play with secrets and forgotten things, with dreamers and those who cling to hope.”
Charlotte stood and stretched until her bones clicked, holding out her arms to embrace me. I held her back, closing my eyes against the faint scent of cobwebs a
nd poison that held more comfort and love than the smell of smoke and fabric conditioner ever did.
“Don’t let them ruin you, little one,” she said against my cheek, her claws scratching the skin on my back. “Stay close to the faerie who holds your heart, and do not give up hoping.”
“You could come with us? When this is all over, you could come to the Seelie Court.”
Her laugh sang past her fangs. “Oh, little one! I would torment that court for fun; I would revel in its terror and feed on its nightmares.” She shook her head, claws coming up to cup my chin. “I belong to the darkness. I am darkness and fear and longing, and this is my home, right here with the shadows.”
“I won’t ever forget you,” I said, a hollow pang echoing in my stomach.
“No, you won’t.”
“Is that a promise or a threat?”
Her eyes sparkled with wicked delight, her cold lips pressing softly to my cheek. “Both.”
Laphaniel rose from the bed, keeping his distance from Charlotte. He looked desperate to escape the damp underground chambers and the monster within it.
“I have something for you,” Charlotte said, releasing me to stand before Laphaniel in a flurry of silk, her movements so quick he bumped into her. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and he froze. She pulled away to tuck something down the front of his shirt. “To keep the bad dreams away.”
Charlotte released him, and he stumbled back a step, taking my hand before backing up towards the exit. The Spider smiled, fangs glinting.
“The Wintersbreath will wear off in a few hours or so,” she said, already turning back to her table. “Seek me out if you start to feel cold and sleepy. I used more than I wanted to save your life, I am a little concerned I may have poisoned you.”
I whirled around. “Charlotte!”
She continued with her potions, not looking up at me. “Tiny chance, little one. I am simply being overcautious.”
“I’m fine, Teya,” Laphaniel said, tugging me away. “Let’s go.”