by Leslie North
Nobody knew about her life. Nobody could speak to it. Jackie didn’t even freaking know where she came from—whether she was California-born or secretly from Nevada, or maybe even a Canadian transplant. Her ancestors had equal likelihood of being from Sweden as Kazakhstan. So why bother celebrating the unknowns?
After all, it wasn’t worth celebrating. Not like these people’s lives.
Sadness clawed at her, and she was the first out the door when their big party began the trip back to the villa. Nobody was more excited than her to get back to the resort. While everyone planned on getting ready with hair and makeup for the wedding, Jackie had different plans.
Fortifying her emotional fortress.
It had been a long time since she’d spiraled this far into the abyss. But it only proved to her how fragile she was, and how dire it would be if she truly ever opened herself up to love. Look what happened to you after a few months of flirty notes and two weeks of actual knowing each other.
God forbid she and Daniel actually started dating and developed something serious. Then when it tumbled to the ground, six months or years later, she might actually perish.
She took a deep breath as she strode back into the plum orchard. Now it was time to prepare herself for the hardest part of the day.
Watching two lovebirds exchange vows while the man she loved—and could never truly have—sat at her side.
14
Finally. After a whirlwind breakfast and early afternoon of getting ready, the wedding was here.
Daniel felt like he and Jackie had barely exchanged ten words, though he had to admit that was not due to anyone’s fault. They’d been too busy. The breakfasts had run long, which meant that Jackie had gotten a late start to getting ready, which meant that she had been distracted by her makeup application process while Daniel had a hell of a time finding the shirt he’d brought for the wedding.
By the time they were ready to go at two p.m., Daniel felt like he needed a nap.
“You look amazing,” he said reverently, dragging his gaze up and down her body. She wore a sparkly blue floor-length gown that hugged her body in all the right places. Big, sparkling diamond earrings dangled from her earlobes, and she’d done her eye makeup in such a way that her green eyes popped more than usual. In a word, she was stunning. Breathtaking. And his.
“Thanks,” she said, giving him what felt like the first genuine smile in thirty-six hours. “I feel pretty amazing. You don’t look so bad yourself.”
“Thanks. Though, I kind of look like I do every day,” he said with a laugh, glancing over to the full-length mirror at their side. “Even though it’s a tux, it’s still just a fancy shirt and pants. What a departure.”
She laughed, reaching up to adjust his collar. “No, but this is different. This is black.”
Finally, there it was. The old spark between them. Relief trickled through him at the thought that the chill might be dissipating at last. Why had he assumed that she was ready to jump ship?
Even though he’d been forecasting their demise, he was still willing to give it a shot. Whether or not it worked out, he wanted to try.
“Huge difference,” he said, slipping his hands over the tops of her hips. “God forbid I try something wild, like navy.”
“Oooh.” She giggled, eyes shining as she looked up at him. “Now that’s too far.”
“Definitely too far,” he agreed, before leaning down to brush his lips against hers. She stiffened—or maybe he imagined it—but when he dove in for a second kiss, she didn’t protest. Had he kissed her at all yesterday? It seemed like between working and the rehearsal dinner and her going to bed early, he’d been deprived the entire day of these luscious lips.
“Mmmm.” He cupped the side of her face as he snagged another kiss. “This reminds me. You’re not allowed to go an entire day without kissing me anymore.”
She grinned through the next kiss. “Oh no?”
“Absolutely not.” He coaxed another hot kiss from her lips.
She tugged on his bottom lip before disconnecting, looking at him with something unknown swirling in her gaze. “Then what are you gonna do during the next business trip?”
Her words landed like a hammer. He could feel the smile fall off his face and shatter on the floor. The sudden pivot to what came after this weekend riled up all the unresolved doubts he’d been struggling to answer—and simultaneously ignore—all day.
And worse yet, he didn’t know what to say. The conversation was too big, too looming. They needed an entire evening to sit down and hash things out. Bare their souls. Reach a consensus on future plans. Not a mere two minutes before they headed to his best friend’s wedding ceremony.
“We need to talk about that another time,” he finally forced out. “We can’t possibly—”
“No, no. I get it.” She pulled away slightly, her expression closing off.
“There’s too much,” he added. “We need to be at the ceremony in five minutes.”
She nodded, her gaze stuck to the floor. “Yeah. Totally.”
It was half-assed at best, but it was the best he could muster for now. He wasn’t prepared to have the conversation now.
He squeezed her hands, leaning down to coax her into another kiss. But she turned away, breezing toward her discarded handbag on the bed. “So are you ready?”
The rejection had been swift. Discreet. And now they were on a moving train that wouldn’t stop until much, much later that night.
“Yeah. Let’s go.” Anxiety formed a tight knot in his gut as she brushed past him toward the door. He followed her, wanting to say something but not knowing what. He wasn’t used to talking about his feelings. He wasn’t used to wanting to even give something a go. This was totally uncharted territory for him…and he was drifting through the ocean without a life raft.
They walked down the hallway, roughly an arm’s length apart. When they finally approached the main foyer that led back to where the ceremony would occur, Jackie finally drifted closer to him. Even took his hand once they walked out into the sunny back patio with the acres and acres of vineyards as their backdrop.
Because she was sticking to the bet. Giving him what he’d asked for. The public performance.
Compartmentalization became his friend. With how badly his confusion swirled, he needed to get his head in the game if he was going to enjoy his best friend’s wedding. He kissed Jackie’s knuckles—because he wanted to, not for show—before he told her where to sit among the five rows of folding chairs facing a Tuscany-inspired columned gazebo.
The set-up was stunning. Grayson already waited in the garden alcove that had been set aside as the place for the groomsmen to gather. From their spot, they could see where a long white runner ran between two groups of chairs, all of which looked toward the gazebo. The officiant who would be performing the ceremony was the only one inside the gazebo while a trio of violinists softly played Pachelbel’s Canon in D.
Blake showed up a moment later, and the three of them waited for the rest of the guests and family members to filter into the patio area. Mila’s two bridesmaids, a best friend from college and another bestie named Lainey who Mila had claimed was her equivalent of Daniel or Blake, were probably doing their final bits of primping and preparing from their position, hidden from view, tucked behind a grove of palms.
“This is fucking awesome,” Blake murmured, squinting out into the vineyard.
Daniel clapped his best friend’s back. “Perfect weather. Perfect day. Perfect couple.”
Grayson drew a breath, looking between both of his friends. “Yeah? I’m glad you guys are here. Seriously wouldn’t have done this without you.”
“Aww, I think Grayson’s nervous,” Blake teased.
Grayson grimaced, his gaze stuck on the cluster of trees that blocked him from his bride. Daniel scanned the crowd, seeing plenty of familiar faces as guests settled into their spots. When he finally spotted Jackie, tucked into the second row, he grinned, waiting for her to loo
k his way.
But she didn’t. The knot in his gut yanked harder.
“Not nervous,” Grayson finally said, manically adjusting the lapels of his coat. “Just ready to get her here in front of me and say ‘I do.’”
“I’d call that nervous,” Blake confirmed.
“It’s normal wedding day jitters,” Daniel said, trying to console his friend. If he had wedding day jitters, then what did Daniel have? Barely-dating shivers? “Just try to relax and enjoy it. You’re going to have a wife in, like, twenty minutes.”
Grayson smirked at him. “Sounds like something you pick up at a drive-thru.”
“In Vegas, you can,” Blake said. Grayson laughed, which seemed like a success. They’d distracted him at least for a minute.
The wedding planner stepped over to them then, signaling the groom and his groomsmen to begin their walk over to the front of the gazebo. The violin music shifted as soon as they stepped out, and all heads turned their way. Once they were tucked in place, Mila’s mother came down the aisle, escorted by her son Philip. Grayson’s mother followed a moment later. Then came the bridesmaids, one by one.
A murmur rippled through the seated guests and Grayson stiffened. Mila was near—she had to be. Even still, he sought out Jackie. Waiting for her to look his way and send him a smile. Instead, she twisted in her seat, avoiding his eager gaze once more.
When the trio of violinists suddenly changed to the “Wedding March,” everyone whooshed to their feet. Daniel caught the big grin that erupted on Grayson’s face, his whole demeanor relaxing, and that’s how he knew that Mila had stepped into view.
The bride appeared at the end of the aisle, wearing a shimmering white dress and a white headpiece with a 1920s flair, her arm hooked with her father’s. Daniel was all smiles, looking between Mila as she approached and Grayson as he beheld her.
Once Mila arrived at the gazebo and her father had given her a tiny kiss and taken his seat, the violinists quieted. The officiant got things moving quickly—Grayson and Mila had specifically wanted a short and sweet ceremony—and before he knew it, the newly-wed couple was exchanging their first kiss as husband as wife.
The fifty or so people in attendance burst into applause then, and Daniel and Blake whooped their approval from Grayson’s side. One newlywed kiss turned into a second and third while Grayson cupped his wife’s growing belly. Everyone cheered.
Mila lifted her small bouquet of lilies and together, she and Grayson walked down the aisle, pumping their fists in the air as the violin trio resumed their music. Daniel smiled as he watched them walk away, then he and Blake filed down behind, paired off with the bridesmaids.
The newlywed couple and the wedding party formed a line under the hibiscus-lined veranda to greet guests. Friends and family began to leave their seats, filing toward the wedding party with grins and cheers.
A flurry of handshakes and greetings and warm hugs emerged then. By the time Jackie made it his way, the line had stalled slightly due to a chatty couple taking more time than normal with Mila and Grayson. Jackie pushed up onto her tiptoes to give Daniel a small kiss.
“You did wonderfully,” she said.
“Thanks, princess.” He wrapped his arms around her, searching her gaze. Blake leaned in.
“All right, you two. Your turn at the gazebo will come another day.”
Daniel laughed, gauging Jackie’s reaction. She smiled, but hell if he could tell what she was thinking anymore. The bet had been clear-cut, but the very real emotions that sprang up between them as a result just made everything murky.
“Have you had a good week, Jackie?” Blake asked.
“The best,” she said, flattening her palms against Daniel’s chest. She fit perfectly in his arms. It was something he noticed every time she was there. “Just not looking forward to next week.”
“The fantasy ends, huh,” Blake said.
“Yep. Everything will go back to normal,” Daniel added. “Unfortunately.”
Jackie’s face went stony just as the photographer came to grab them. It was picture time. The photographer led the wedding party and the parents to a different part of the vineyard, an expertly manicured knoll with a stunning view of the vineyards rolling away into the distance. With the blue, cloudless sky, all the greenery around them, and their closest loved ones gathered around, Daniel already knew that Grayson and Mila would cherish these photos forever.
Group photos turned into singles which turned into a re-do of group photos because of a lens issue. With each minute that passed, Daniel was more anxious to find Jackie and spend the rest of the evening by her side. By the time they were formally dismissed to the reception, Daniel was practically running.
“Dang, Daniel,” Blake teased. “You can’t wait to get to that open bar, can you?”
“More like Jackie,” Daniel clarified, sending his friend a side smirk. The friends speed-walked toward the reception, the air growing cooler as they headed down some stairs toward the unique venue. Their footsteps echoed down the smooth sandstone tunnel, which then opened up into the spacious, backlit cavern this villa was famous for.
Tables stretched out before them, covered with white linens, each one full of plates, silverware, and shocking sprays of vibrant red and white lilies. The cave arced up at the sides, forming a dome overhead, and light displays played along the smooth taupe walls. It was exactly like being in a dream. Except this was reality.
He spotted Jackie across the way, picking cheese cubes off a platter. He headed her way, leaving Blake to chat up a single lady he’d already spotted by the door. As he approached, drinking her in, he made the decision: tonight, they’d talk about what the future might hold for them, even if it was the scariest conversation he’d ever have in his life. He could finagle a boardroom full of banker sharks, but the prospect of talking about the future with Jackie was far more terrifying.
He swept up to her, wrapping an arm around her. She smiled up at him just as she popped the cube of gouda into her mouth.
“There you are. Pictures took long enough.”
“You’re telling me. Every time I thought we were done, the photographer would ask for a re-do with someone’s arm a quarter of an inch to the left.”
Jackie giggled, reaching for another cheese cube. “Sounds like hell. But you didn’t have it nearly as bad as I did in here. I was forced to wander this cavern wonderland, eat cheese, and listen to live jazz music.”
“Life is rough,” Daniel said, gently rubbing the sides of her arms.
She let out an exaggerated sigh. “I guess I’ll manage.”
A waiter passed by with a platter full of white wine glasses. Daniel grabbed two and handed one to Jackie. “Hopefully this will help things.”
They clinked glasses, sharing warm smiles. Still, the anxiety thumped distantly in his chest. His flight to Bangladesh left on Tuesday.
Before Daniel could even take a sip, Grayson and Mila swept in, eliciting cheers and applause. They did a little dance toward the party just as Daniel’s phone buzzed in his pocket.
He sighed, fishing it out, already fearful that he knew exactly who it was: his father.
“Oh, look.” He swiped the phone to silent, setting his jaw. It was definitely his father—and there was no way in hell he was answering. “Sorry, Dad. Not today.”
Jackie sipped at her wine. “What’s wrong?”
“I told him that I would be unavailable today, due to Grayson’s wedding. I made that explicitly clear. I think I deserve one full day to myself each year, right?”
Jackie frowned. “I’d say you deserve more than that.”
Daniel scoffed. “Yeah, well, with my job, I only get one—and I have to take it by force.” He shook his head, downing the rest of the contents of his wine glass.
Silence stretched between them. Jackie’s gaze sizzled on him, and he couldn’t tell if she was scrutinizing him or sympathizing. But he didn’t want to think about his father or work—at all. When another waiter passed by, he sn
agged a second glass of wine and lifted it to tap against Jackie’s.
“I want to have an amazing evening with you,” he said. “Because we both deserve it.”
Finally, Jackie’s private smile returned, igniting butterflies in parts of him he didn’t know existed.
And that right there—it was proof that although they didn’t have years and years under their belts together, there was something uncanny between them.
Even though Daniel wasn’t sure about how to proceed, he was sure that he wanted to.
15
By the end of the evening, Jackie felt like she could publish a book. No, two books.
One would be all the reasons that her and Daniel would never work. He was too busy. He was leaving on Tuesday. For him, free time was a distant concept. Everyone in his life knew it, reiterated it, accepted it. That was the biggest and thorniest among so many other reasons.
Yet the other book she could fill was with all the ways in which she was hopelessly attracted to Daniel, even when she had a whole entire book of reasons to stay away.
By the time they drifted back to the bedroom, toasty from the wine and the dancing and laughter, the soft part of her heart was—at least for the moment—winning the battle against her brain.
Screw the consequences. She wanted one last night with the man who had won her heart. Even if she regretted it tomorrow, and next week, and for the entire rest of the year.
Daniel had at least been a bright spot in her existence, even if a lasting relationship would never—could never in her wildest dreams—work out between them.
When she met Daniel’s gaze, just as he pushed open the plum orchard door, she saw the question marks there. The free pass he was giving her to take this evening in any direction she wanted. And oh, she only wanted it to go to one place.