Strength: 29(8)
Constitution: 18
Agility: 33(6)
Wisdom: 27
Intelligence: 17
Charisma: 13
Luck: 15
Common Skills:
Air Guitar: 14
Awkward: 45
Belching: 16
Bend and Snap: 27
Birdwatching: 3
Bop It!: 93
Breathing: 12
Button Smashing: 25
Charge: 107
Climbing: 97
Daydreaming: 32
Detect Bullshit: 2
Digestion: 3
Dodge: 19
Eating: 17
Eyebrow Arching: 13
Eyebrow Waggling: 7
Fidget Spinner: Mastered
Finger Snapping: 3
Flatulence: 13
Flirting: 2
Flossing: 13
Fondling: 137
Girl Screams: 3
Hand Eye Coordination: 61
Handshaking: 2
Hand-Some: 3 x4
Handstands: 67
Headbutt: 5
Inappropriate Outbursts: 22
Juggling: 134
Jumping: 5
Kick: 109
Kissing: 1
Knuckle Popping: 76
Masturbation: Mastered
Moping: 18
Mumbler: 19
Oral: 6
Patty Cake: 68
Predictive Analysis: 7
Running: 7
Sexual Confidence: 3
Sexual Deviance: 47
Skipping: 7
Sleeping: 78
Smelling: 15
Smooth Talking: 22
Streaking: 15
Swimming: 37
Thumb Twiddling: 78
Thumb-War: 99
Unarmed Combat: 46
Uppercut: 10
Walking Upright: 19
Wiggle: 14]
“Please, stop spamming me with all those skills! It fu—” I was sent into the oblivion of sleep before I could finish my tirade. Bastard.
In Game - Day 3
Chapter 31
Location: Sharmon, The Horseshoe City
A yawn escaped me as I slowly trekked back to the inn.
Rolling my shoulders I tried to loosen them from my previous night’s activities. Sonya and Sun had both ridden me hard, but I preferred Sun’s tantric methods. It was hard to say who did the most damage to my body.
It’s strange, I don’t recall these sensations from the day before. Hopefully, the changes were a good thing. The doc had my back and could handle it.
A wagon passed me with a load of items headed for the local sundry shops, and I waved him down.
“How can I help you today?” The man had an easy smile that reached his eyes.
“I’d like to buy all your [Healing Potions] and maybe a small bag.”
“Tell ya what, son. I’ll give ya a five percent discount for buying in bulk. That’ll be ninety-five gold, and I’ll toss in this souvenir bag for free.” The bag was the perfect size and made of felt. Reminded me of those bags they sold bottles of alcohol in.
“Deal,” I said, and handed over the coins. He unloaded the crates, and I slipped them into my [Bag of Holding].
“Pleasure doing business with ya, son. It’d have taken me all day to off load those. You saved me a lot of effort. Would you like to arrange a partnership? I get the potions, and you buy them from me?”
“Sure, if you don’t overcharge me this time.”
The merchant laughed and nodded his head. “Ok, each crate holds twenty potions, say ten gold per crate? It’s a great deal, but only because you’re buying in bulk.”
Truthfully, I did not know if I was being scammed. However, that reduction in price was significant, and individually the potions were closer to one gold each. “You got a partner, how will you find me?”
“Don’t worry about that, I’ll find ya when I have at least a crate.” We shook on it, and then he trundled off up the street with a much lighter load.
I slid a potion into the [Souvenir Bag] and popped the cork. Sipping the sweet flavored beverage, I made my way back to the inn. Using a sack to hide the drink was something I saw in some old American gangster movies. The difference is they used 40oz bottles of beer, not [Healing Potions]. Oh well, I was the town lush, and my poison of choice was these cotton-candy flavored drinks.
The first sip was the best. Pain and stiffness faded, and I embraced the euphoria like an old lover. I had worldly experience now that I’d become a man, which allowed me to say things like ‘lover.’ My random thoughts died away the moment I walked into the inn.
Butter sat at the long table sipping a hot drink when he spotted me. His stoic face broadened into a wide smile when his eyes locked onto mine, and I quickly tucked the potion away into my [Bag of Holding].
“Walk of shame, my friend,” he said. “Not that I understand what there is to be ashamed of, but good for you.”
“Is Amard up and ready to go?” I ignored the comment and summoned a shuriken, feeling the heat against my palm. Butter’s eyes narrowed as he stared at it.
“He said something about his class, and that he’d be back shortly. What is that thing you are holding?”
The shuriken disappeared, reabsorbed into my body. “Nothing,” I said too quickly. My tired mind slipped up, overjoyed at the summoning ability—and the large number of healing potions I had on me. That was enough to put a little pep into anyone’s step.
“More mysteries. It’s dangerous to tempt a thief with secrets, and usually ends up biting you in the ass.” Butter’s voice was soft and dangerous, but I already knew he was more than he seemed.
“We have a saying in my country, ‘The bird is known by its flight.’ You talk of my mysteries, and you are no different. We are the same bird, yes?”
Butter’s hooded gaze opened back up as he smiled and then laughed. “You aren’t as witless as you appear. And here is Amard, shall we go?”
Amard walked over to us in upgraded armor and a new weapon. A groan burbled inside me because I should have looked for better cloth armor. My gear was still functional, and Sonya gave me a few weapon upgrades. It’d have to do.
“Let’s go.” I stood up and headed for the door.
We stepped out onto Outer Course and I navigated us through the town. I spotted the [Wizard Circle] and bound myself to it while the other two looked at me curiously. I didn’t trust [Altars] and I didn’t want to anger the Soulkeeper.
The [Reptile’s Revenge] dungeon marked on my map showed that it was in a jungle to the southeast. The map from Dr. Soulstoner provided a location but was weak on details. Outside of town, we headed southeast but took a detour so we didn’t come near the outpost by the bridge.
I’d rather not run into any gnoks. I’m sure they knew I was in Sharmon, especially with the [Drama Meter] attached to my wrist. Still, it was no reason to call more attention to myself.
Trekking through the woods was pleasant enough, and most of the animals fled at our approach. The exception was the [Coyotes], which hunted us in pairs. If we did not kill them fast enough, their howls would bring others.
[Dragon Strike] was my go-to move. It snapped their weak bones like twigs. Canines seemed less intimidating with four arms. I had so many limbs I could continue pummeling them even if they latched onto an arm. I was confident I could take a small pack down, but I had seen nothing I’d consider an [Alpha].
One thing I noticed was the smell of burned hair and flesh, which was over the top. Each of my strikes carried fire or heat damage with it, and I could not fault the layers of realism. After killing about ten [Coyotes], the rest learned to avoid us, which was another feature that surprised me. The animals recognized when they were the predator or the prey.
[Unarmed Combat +2]
[Dragon Strike +1]
[Dodge +2]
[Kick +3]
[Accumulated Loot:
20 Tokens of Acclimation, 13 Gold, 2 Coyote Hide, 5 Coyote Meat
OTM: While traveling in a group, all loot is distributed evenly. You can change this in the group settings. Loot for items Uncommon items and above are set to Master Looter, which means one person loots it all and then distributes. Looter is currently set to Group Leader (You). This can also be changed in the group settings.]
The deeper we went more I was sure something was stalking us. Did the [Coyotes] back off because of us, or what followed?
“What’s wrong?” Amard whispered because he saw my head snap around to look past him.
“Just a hunch. I think something is stalking us and it is getting bolder.”
“You sure?”
“Yes.”
“Good news then. I think we are exiting this area anyway,” he said pointing ahead of us. “I can see your jungle down that cliff. You may feel uneasy now, but that looks downright deadly.”
Butter looked down into the basin below, and I joined him. The jungle below stretched for miles. The trees were overgrown and twisted around each other while vines and foliage blocked what the trees didn’t. It culminated into an imposing barrier. I felt chills crawling up my spine as I thought about pushing through that and fighting monsters—no telling what inhabited that mess.
In the distance, I could see our destination, but it would take hours to reach it.
Chapter 32
Location: Jungle
“This’ll be fun,” I muttered and climbed down.
[Climbing +2]
Halfway down, the stones were wet with humidity and covered in moss or algae. Whatever it was, it was slick, and I barely held on. A little further down, firmly rooted plants helped secure my grip, but I’d forgotten the others.
A body crashed into me as it screamed on its way down, and while I caught him, I was knocked off my perch too. Thankfully, the fall was short if painful.
“Sorry,” Amard muttered, shoving a [Healing Potion] into one of my lower hands. I popped the cork and sucked on that sweet cotton-candy goodness. At this point, I no longer cared about how people looked at me while I drank them. Not that I would broadcast I had a stockpile in my bag, but there it was.
Butter came crashing towards me, and I was not about to let him break my potion, so my other three limbs swatted him away, so he hit the ground instead.
“Really?” He asked while spitting out dirt and brushing himself clean.
“Shit tits, man. I’m not your cushion.”
“You caught Amard.”
“He gives me [Healing Potions].”
Amard looked at both of us and laughed. “You two have issues. A few bruises never hurt anyone. The bigger concern is how we are getting out; there is no way I can climb back up that.”
“I can, and I have a rope on me. Didn’t want to waste it for this, in case we need it later,” Butter said.
“Really?” I retorted right back at him, but it was fine. I forgot I had a rope in my supplies too—came with the bag.
“Okay, I guess I deserved that.”
My light clothing clung to my skin, the humidity had soaked it through and through. I couldn’t imagine how the others dealt with the heat in their leather armor.
We barely cut a path into the jungle before our troubles started.
Hisss!
It was the only warning we had before a snake struck. I dodged with honed reflexes I did not know I had. My left upper hand grabbed the snake right behind the head, and I whipped it against a tree, feeling the taut flesh go limp.
[Dodge +1]
[Name: Dark-Spotted Anaconda
Venom: None
Average Size: 4 Meters
Attack: Constriction – If this snake wraps itself around you, it’ll squeeze tighter and tighter until it’s broken all the bones in your body. Struggling speeds up the process.
Author Notes: Don’t try to out swim them, you’ll lose.
“Shit tits, it’s only a baby,” I told them. “At least it’s not poisonous.”
Butter looked on unperturbed, but Amard could not contain his surprise. Without even thinking about it, I tossed the dead snake in my almost empty bag. Right alongside all the food and water I brought with me. No way in hell was I drinking water out of a jungle, game or not.
It was almost another hour and about ten snakes later when I could see the sky between the trees again.
[Loot: 35 Tokens of Acclimation, 17 Gold, 7 Anaconda Snake Skins, 1 Albino Snake Skin (Rare), Unidentified Rock (Epic)]
I kept the whole snake when I could, but when I couldn’t—the loot did not appear to be special. The skin was obviously a crafting component, and the rock I think was a quest. I left both items in their [Loot Spheres].
The rock having a rarity of [Epic] screamed quest. I was not sure why I was opposed to quests so much, but this one piqued my curiosity. Either way, the items went into my bag. I’d figure it out later.
“I hate this place,” Amard muttered, as if afraid he would wake a sleeping monster. “Do you know where we are going?”
“There.” I pointed at the shimmering portal ahead, but internally I groaned. Amard wasn’t the only one miserable. The dungeon portal was between the cleft in a mountain, and beyond I could see more jungle. I never cared for open world dungeons because I enjoyed the linear crawl of enclosed darkness. Plus, caves and dungeons naturally regulated their temperature. “Ok, lets clear this area out around here, and set up a camp in that shallow cave.”
“Any reason why?” Amard asked.
“Because I’m sure we got lucky crossing that jungle. Other than a few harmless [Capybara] the only real threat we ran into were the [Dark-Spotted Anacondas]. If we die in the dungeon, it’ll kick us out here at the entrance, and we’ll need a safe place to regroup.”
“Can we do this without a healer?” Butter didn’t look so confident about our chances, and I wondered if the guy would re-spawn. My lack of knowledge could kill the man, but he did not seem concerned about dying, so I left it alone.
“I’m a healer. Figured if I wanted to team up with you I needed to fill a role. I’d met the requirements for a [Druid] a while back. Visited the trainer this morning.” Amard cast a spell, and I felt my skin turn wooden, which was cool and disturbing at the same time. “I also made sure I had all the important spells. I have [Minor Heal] but don’t get [Cure Poison] or [Cure Disease] until the next level. If you help me level today, I bought the [Spell Scrolls], so I can use them tomorrow most likely. Also, I have a few extra utility spells that might be useful.”
“I’m not in a hurry, and I have a few days to complete the dungeon. If you think it’ll make it easier, I am ok with clearing it and then coming back out here to camp.” It was true, the doc recommended the [Endless Depths], but it sounded like something I could do at all levels of my development. It could wait until next time.
“I do not recommend camping out here,” Butter said. “[Authors] could attack us and if we died out here, we are sent back to town. If we die inside, we can just step back through the portal. As long as we are in the dungeon, the monsters won’t re-spawn either. So we could set up camp inside.”
“He is right; we should set up camp inside and then we can take our time today clearing out the trash mobs.” Amard and Butter had come to the same conclusion, and I saw no reason to disagree with them.
“I’m still new, so whatever works best. Now, let’s go kill some snakes.”
Amard groaned, and I chuckled. The cooling energy crawled across my body as I stepped through the shimmering portal.
[You have entered the dungeon Serpent’s Basin
You are the first to discover this Dungeon. All rewards are doubled for your group during the next 48 hours.
You gained title Dungeoneer. Because you discovered a new dungeon, you will receive a 5% permanent boost to your luck roll while in dungeons, and 5% Experience boost inside dungeons you’ve discovered.
If you are the first to clear this dungeon, there will be addition
al awards.
Description: Serpent’s Basin once thrived as a hub of innovation and commerce, but now lays forgotten. A curse brought it low, and its citizens barely survived the poisons that still pollute the low-lying areas. To contain the corruption [Earth Mages] raised mountains to block the basin in and hopefully hide it from discovery.
Only the cruelest of creatures survived the crucible that followed, and those that did not adapt were dead within a week. You have rediscovered these lands and tremble at the might of the creatures arrayed before you. Seek those that live within, but remember what it takes to survive.]
Blinking away the message I frowned as my companions stepped in beside me.
Chapter 33
Location: Serpent’s Basin (Dungeon)
“This isn’t [Reptile’s Revenge],” I told them, not sure what to make of the place we stepped into. On the one hand, a virgin dungeon should have some awesome rewards. On the other, this wasn’t the place I needed.
“Relax,” Amard said. “This is an open world dungeon, but that means we are in a pocket realm that is a fully functional world, almost. The description told us that there was a town here too. What you need to understand is that open world dungeons have smaller dungeons inside. We are in the right spot—just have to find your dungeon within the dungeon.”
“Oh, well, that’s strange. Does that mean we’ll get another first?”
“No—”
“Yes,” Butter interrupted. “Lit Dungeo, the God of Dungeons, controls them and if it really is another dungeon inside of this one, then as long as it’s not connected to multiple locations, we should get another first. It’ll be another pocket world.”
“Really?” Amard’s brow pinched together as if she doubted the thief.
“Really. The God of Dungeons wants people to visit his realms, so he rewards those that take risks, and does so generously.” Butter had a dark smirk on his face. “I mean your death feeds him and makes him more powerful, so if he can kill you in here, all the better.”
Amard exchanged glances with me, and we both mentally shrugged at each other.
[Point of View Shift
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