“All right, all right!” I held up my hands in surrender. “I understand. I guess I didn’t think of all the ramifications.”
“We shouldn’t do it,” said Matteo. “There’s no point. It may not work, and even if it does—”
“Are you sure you have everyone’s best interests at heart when you say that?” I asked. “Or are you just trying to keep from losing Ella?”
He looked like wanted to unleash Agatha and Penelope and the rest on me. “You don’t understand—”
“What it’s like to care about someone you can never be with?” My voice rose to a roar. “To know you might lose that person forever, in the end? Yes, as a matter of fact, I do understand that!”
I really, really hadn’t intended to say that, and now that it had slipped out, my cheeks burned with embarrassment. I knew Cordelia was looking at me, but I couldn’t meet her gaze. The moments of silence which followed felt like hours.
“Look,” I said, in a softer tone. “In the end, perhaps we aren’t the people who should be making this decision. Maybe we don’t have the right.”
“Then who does?” asked Ella.
I gazed through a rip in the tent fabric at the darkening sky. “I think I know.”
CHAPTER TWELVE
A Haircut
I asked Cordelia and the others to let me speak to Crispin alone. I wasn’t sure how this conversation was going to go, and it would be difficult enough without an audience.
Crispin and Alice were sitting on a bench near a campfire when I found them. Alice was trying to boil down all the significant events of the past three years into five minutes. The happy light in her eyes caused me an additional pang of remorse. She reminded me so much of the carefree young Crispin I remembered.
And in order to get him back, I’d have to destroy her.
“Then, just as the cerberus was about to chomp down on my leg,” she said, “I got him in the neck with a dart dipped in nightapple toxin. He was sleeping like a big three-headed baby in seconds.”
“And then you finished him off?” asked Crispin.
Alice was horrified by the suggestion. “Certainly not! I adopted him.”
Crispin smiled proudly. “That’s my girl.”
“His name’s Chester, William, and Bartholomew. One name for each head. I can’t wait to show him to you. He’s quite tame now.”
I didn’t want to interrupt them, but Alice finally saw me standing there. She waved at me. “Uncle Nick! Where’s Aunt Cordelia?”
I jumped in surprise. “Er…ah…Aunt?”
She shrugged. “That’s how I think of her. Dad’s told me so many stories about the two of you. I should show you all the pictures I drew of you when I was a little girl. I even made dolls.” She peered at me more closely. “In hindsight, though, I think I may have made your doll a little too warthoggy. You’re more handsome than I’d expected.”
I blinked. It was the first time anyone had called me handsome since my curse. “Ah…thanks. Cordelia’s with Ella and Matteo right now. I…” I fidgeted, extending and retracting my claws. “I need to speak to you alone, Crispin.”
“Of course!” said Alice. “You two must have a lot to talk about. I’ll run along and give you some privacy.”
“You don’t have to,” I said, even though I didn’t want her to hear what I was about to say. Under the circumstances, I felt guilty separating her from her father even for a moment.
“Perfectly all right.” She planted a kiss on her father’s cheek. “See you later, Dad. And I want to have a long talk with you and Cordelia later on, Nick. We need to get to know each other.” She grinned at me, then walked away.
“She’s…amazing,” I murmured, watching her go.
“Yes.” Crispin gave a wistful smile and poked at the fire with a stick. “So much like her mother.”
I crouched down on the other side of the fire from him. “It can’t have been easy. Raising her here, and having to deal with…Lara.”
“It’s been agony sometimes. But Alice makes it all worth it.”
I felt a stab of regret. “I understand. Er…does she have any powers?”
“Probably, but she doesn’t use them. We decided that would be best. She’s never done any magic.”
“Why not?”
“Isn’t it obvious? She’s the daughter of the White Rabbit and—in a way—the Unqueen. Her powers could be so strong that it would be impossible to control them. I don’t want her to go down that road.”
“Are you sure that’s wise? Wouldn’t it be better to teach her how to control them?”
Crispin shook his head. “With all due respect, Nick, you don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Apparently, I somehow repressed your powers for years, Crispin. I don’t think that did you any good later on.”
“Or maybe it would have been better if I’d never found out about them at all.” Crispin tossed the stick onto the fire. “But that’s not what’s really bothering you, is it?” His eyes bored into me. “You’ve clearly got something on your mind; you might as well spit it out.”
I heaved a sigh. “I think I’ve come up with something that might stop Beatrice.”
“Brilliant. So why do you look so guilty, then?”
I dug a claw into the earth at my feet. “Because if it works…and that’s a very big ‘if’…it’ll change everything.”
He was silent for a moment. “You’re talking about altering the past.”
“I’m afraid so, yes. And I understand now why you were uncomfortable with the idea earlier. You don’t want everything to be erased.”
He glanced in the direction Alice had gone. “Not everything, no.”
“That’s what Cordelia said. She also pointed out that even if Alice did still exist in an altered timeline, she wouldn’t be the same Alice, by definition. This Alice would be lost.”
“I know.” Crispin suddenly looked far older than his forty-odd years. His shoulders slumped, and he gave the fire an ill-advised jab that collapsed the stack of logs. Sparks flew and embers rolled away.
I pushed one of the glowing coals back with my toe. “I’m not going to do this to you, Crispin. It wouldn’t be right.”
He got up from his bench to sit down on the ground beside me. “I appreciate that, Nick. I really do. But if there’s a possibility of stopping Beatrice, then you have to try. Regardless of everything else.”
“I’ll be destroying Alice. Not to mention countless other people I don’t even know.”
“Maybe, maybe not. None of us truly understands how these things work. In any case, I have an idea for how I might be able to protect my Alice from the shift in the timeline.”
“How?”
“I can send her back in time. Many years before all this began. So long as she’s in the past, it’s possible that whatever we do here in the twentieth century won’t affect her. Her memories might not stay the same, but at least she’ll be alive.”
“That’s a long shot, though, isn’t it?”
“Yes. But you have to save the world…and I have to save Alice. I owe it to her. If it weren’t for her, I would have lost myself a long time ago.”
I turned to look at him. “What are you talking about?”
“It’s these powers, Nick.” He held up his hand, and white light flickered at his fingertips. “It isn’t only because of Alice that I haven’t tried to go back and change the past. It’s because I was scared.”
“Of what?”
“Myself. That’s also why I created the White Rabbit.”
“Is this about what Lara was saying earlier? All that Man in White stuff?”
“Yeah.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “It sounds silly when I try to put it into words, but…in my head, it’s almost like the White Rabbit is the one with all the scary time-warping powers and magic portals, and Crispin Beasley is still…himself. A different person. That way, Crispin doesn’t have to stop existing.”
I looked at him with concern. “But
why would he—you—cease to exist?”
“Because if I stopped trying to control these powers—if I fully gave myself over to them—I don’t know what I’d become. I’m not sure I believe all that White King nonsense, but I’m certain I wouldn’t be Crispin Beasley anymore. Molly lost the battle against something dark and dangerous inside her. I don’t want to go the same way.”
“You won’t. You never could.”
“I wouldn’t willingly sacrifice my humanity, no. But if I let myself go too far, I might not have a choice any more. Channeling my power into the White Rabbit persona helped a lot. But raising Alice, that’s what really kept me grounded. Whenever I felt tempted to push the limits with magic, the thought of her always held me back.”
I nodded. “I understand.”
“So I can’t let her be erased. She deserves better than that.”
“But you’ll be gone, once everything’s changed. I mean, this you. Alice’s father.”
“I don’t need to go on existing. I’d prefer to give the old Crispin—or rather, the young Crispin—a better life. I don’t want him to have to go through everything I suffered, even if there were some good things too.” His expression became grave. “And I’d like to save Molly, if there’s any chance of it. If you and Cordelia can rescue me and her from Madame Levesque in the past, then maybe everything will be all right in the end.”
A growl rumbled in my throat. “Oh, we’ll stop Levesque. Don’t you worry.” Then I remembered that none of this was guaranteed. “But we have to get back first, and I’m not sure we can do that.”
“What’s your idea?”
“Take Ella and Matteo back to Basile, have Ella leave the ball as the clock strikes twelve instead of staying with Matteo.” I snorted bitterly. “Now I come to think of it, the whole thing is pretty stupid. I mean, she probably won’t even be able to get out.”
“Beatrice let them out before.”
“Yeah, the two of them together. Because she knew that wouldn’t affect the time loop. If Ella leaving by herself is what will break the curse, then Beatrice will just stop her.”
“Maybe you and Cordelia can hold Beatrice and the clockmen off while Ella escapes.”
“I don’t know about that. And besides, this is all assuming Beatrice doesn’t suspect a trap and throw us in the dungeons the second we show up.”
“If Ella and Matteo play their cards right, I don’t think she’ll do anything to them. They can probably trick her into thinking they want to come back and live in luxury at Basile instead of wandering the world the way they have been all these centuries.”
“Maybe so. But it might be stretching things a little if Cordelia and I try the same story on her.”
“You’ll have to go in disguise. Cordelia can use a glamour spell.”
“But I can’t. Remember? My curse doesn’t like glamour spells. They don’t work on me.”
“Yes…your curse.” There was a strange look in his eyes.
I frowned. “What?”
“There’s something I can do about that problem. It’ll allow you to use a glamour spell…but don’t get too excited about it, because I’m fairly certain it won’t last after you rewrite history.”
“What do you mean, ‘don’t get excited’?”
He got up and stood over me. “This is very dangerous magic, so don’t go asking my younger self to try it, okay? Even if by some miracle he were to avoid bungling it completely, the consequences wouldn’t be worth it. You understand? This is temporary.”
“What’s temporary? Could you stop being so mysterious for about three seconds?”
He stretched his hands toward me. “Hold still.”
I didn’t like the sound of that—or the look of his eyes, which were now pure white. White light flashed at his fingertips, then shot towards me in a blast of lightning. The impact levitated me off the ground, and I hung in mid-air as white sparks crackled around me.
“Crispin!” I heard Cordelia shout. She ran over to us and gazed up at me in astonishment. “What in the world are you doing?”
“Quiet,” said the white-eyed Crispin, in a strange, emotionless voice. “I’m concentrating.”
“Crispin—naaargh!” I cried out in pain as the magic seared into my hide. It felt like all my joints were being wrenched the wrong way. In a futile effort to break free from the spell, I clawed at the air…
…which was when I discovered that my claws were gone. I turned my palms toward me and watched in shock as the rough pads melted into human skin. The change spread from my hands all the way down my arms, erasing the fur and shrinking the monstrous proportions of my limbs. The joints in my legs rearranged, and I could feel my face shifting into a different form. My tail, meanwhile, had gone numb. I realized that it wasn’t there any more.
The magic released me abruptly, and I fell to the ground on my hands and knees. Being on all fours suddenly felt a lot less comfortable than usual. And I wasn’t looking down at paws, but hands—actual, normal human hands. I stood up on shaky legs and clutched at my clothes, which were now far too big for me.
“I’ll fix that,” said Crispin. He seemed exhausted, but he was still able to summon enough magic to alter my clothes. They immediately grew smaller to fit my changed body.
“Nick,” Cordelia breathed, “you’re…”
“Human,” said Crispin. “For now, anyway.”
I reached up to feel my face. No snout. No horns. Hair only on the top and a little around the face. “Crispin, how in the world did you—”
“The same way I got Molly’s voice back. I reached back in time to access your human form.”
“That’s not possible.” Cordelia reached out and touched my face, then pulled her hand back and flushed with embarrassment.
“No,” said Crispin, “you’re right, it’s not. But we’re very close to a castle where all sorts of impossible things are going on, so the laws of magic are a bit more…lenient.”
I continued running my hands over my face, trying to convince myself that this was real. “I don’t know whether to thank you or to scold you for being so reckless with magic.”
“I’m too old for you to scold me.”
“You’re never going to be too old for that.” On impulse, I grabbed him and gave him a bone-crunching hug. “But I think I’ll go with the first option. Thank you. Very much.”
“Is that Uncle Nick?”
We all turned to look at Alice, who had just come back. She appeared disappointed. “I thought he looked better the other way.”
“It’s temporary,” said Crispin.
“Thank goodness.” She dropped her voice to a whisper. “Listen, Dad, I think there’s something odd going on.”
“Stranger than usual?”
“People are saying they’ve seen a man—a stranger—sneaking around the camp. And given how many reports I’ve heard, perhaps there’s more than one.”
“Spies?” said Cordelia. “From…her?”
“She wouldn’t dare,” said Crispin. “The camp is too well-protected. We may not have been able to stop her from invading Talesend, but we’ve been able to keep her from invading this place so far. She—”
A figure suddenly darted out of the shadows and lunged at Alice. She spun into a fighting stance, but it was too late. The brawny man hooked one arm around her neck and held a dagger to her ribs.
“One move from any of you,” he bellowed, “and she dies.” He was bare-chested and tattooed like the other selkies we’d seen, but his build was heavier, and the two long tusks that protruded from his mouth reminded me of a walrus instead of a seal.
We all froze, our eyes fixed on the gleaming dagger. “Let her go!” shouted Crispin.
“And relinquish such an excellent bargaining chip?” said a familiar voice. “I don’t think so.”
Lara approached from behind the walrus-man, flanked by two selkies. She smiled at Alice and stroked her cheek. “Daughter.”
Alice recoiled from her touch. “You’re
not my mother!”
“I could be, if you’d stop listening to your deluded father. It would wonderful to have a worthy heir to all my power.” She paused. “Though, by ‘heir,’ I actually mean ‘replacement body’—once this one wears out, of course. Always best to plan ahead for these things.”
Crispin clenched his fists. “Get out, Lara. This place doesn’t belong to you.”
“Oh, I’ll go. I’ll be happy to leave you to rot in this cesspit. But only after I’ve prevented this little scheme of yours.”
“You eavesdropped,” I guessed.
“Naturally. Bad form, I know, but I had to know what you were up to. I imagine Beatrice will be very grateful when she finds out I’ve stopped you.” Lara gave me a puzzled look. “Didn’t you use to be taller?”
I gave her a sardonic smile. “I’ve had a haircut.”
“Ah. That explains it.”
Crispin’s hands burned with white light. “I won’t let you stand in our way, Lara.”
“You’ll let me do whatever I like. Either that, or lose your daughter. Your choice.”
“Dad,” said Alice, “whatever she wants, don’t let her—”
“But darling, what I want is what’s best for you,” said Lara. “Do you really want your father to abandon you in some bygone era?”
Alice looked at Crispin. “Dad, what’s she talking about?”
“He’s decided to destroy your life,” said Lara. “Apparently you weren’t consulted.”
“It’s not like that!” said Crispin. “Alice, I don’t want to lose you. But I have to stop Beatrice, and this is the only way.”
“Except it’s not going to happen.” Lara snapped her fingers.
Two selkies dragged Ella and Matteo into the circle. They struggled and kicked, but their captors were too strong.
“It’s time we put an end to this notion of changing history once and for all.” Lara gestured to the selkies. Her soldiers drew long, curving daggers from their belts and touched them to Ella and Matteo’s throats.
The Stroke of Eleven Page 14