Bennett didn’t know what to say. He sat on the back steps as the dogs ran around the yard, the sun setting quickly now that November was nearly upon them. Finally, he decided to be brave and ask, “What aren’t you telling me?”
The silence coming through the line didn’t exactly settle Bennett’s thrumming pulse, but he forced himself to wait.
“The curator pretended not to be there.” Jennie’s voice held so much hurt it made Bennett’s heart pinch.
“Oh, sweetheart. I’m sorry.”
“I honestly don’t know what to do.”
“You said the art scene was big in Seattle. Surely that isn’t the only gallery.”
“No, I’m sure it’s not.” But her voice sounded haunted and so, so far away. Bennett felt impossibly far from her, and he didn’t know what to do about it.
“So you’ll just stay until you find a home.” He wanted her home in Hawthorne Harbor. Wanted to find her lying in his hammock with those two silly dogs when he got home from the fire house. Wanted to tell her that her future was with him, in this old white house that had once belonged to his grandmother.
“Yes,” she said. “I’ll stay until I figure things out.”
Bennett nodded to the near-darkness and said his good-byes, feeling like they were final though neither of them had said as much.
He sat on the steps for a long time, way past dark and beyond the time when the dogs had stopped playing and flopped at his feet. His thoughts wouldn’t line up and make any sense, and he’d felt like this exactly once before, and that was when Jennie had left town the first time.
Even with Cynthia, he’d hated her decision but at least he understood it. At least she’d never hidden who she was and what she wanted from her husband, her marriage, and her life.
But Jennie…. Jennie didn’t even know what she wanted, so how could Bennett make sure he was who she wanted?
He eventually got up and went inside with the dogs, went through the motions of locking the house and turning off the lights, plugging in his phone, and brushing his teeth. One question wouldn’t leave him alone long enough to fall asleep.
Should I go to Seattle and talk to Jennie?
He finally decided that he’d talk to the chief tomorrow and see which days he could get off, because he didn’t think he’d get to the bottom of Jennie’s feelings without seeing her face-to-face.
So the next afternoon, when he went into the fire house for his shift, his first stop was Chief Harvey’s office. “Do you have a few minutes?”
The fire chief looked up from his tablet, which lay flat on his desk. He ducked his head so he could peer over his glasses and said, “Of course. Come in.”
Bennett checked behind him before entering the chief’s office, his pulse bobbing around somewhere in the back of his throat. He wasn’t sure why he was nervous now. He had plenty of vacation days, and it wasn’t a high fire season.
“So I need some time off,” Bennett said as he sat down across the desk from Chief Harvey.
“Oh? Things okay?”
“Yes, yes,” Bennett said. “It’s just…I need to go to Seattle for a few days.” The chief didn’t need all the details of his personal life. Mabel’s words hit him again, and Bennett straightened his back. He was not going to let Jennie run away to Seattle and keep secrets from him. If she didn’t want to be with him, okay.
Well, it wasn’t really okay, but he could at least deal with cards that were on the table. But she was keeping hers close to the vest, and Bennett needed to get a peek at them.
The chief pulled a calendar book out of the top drawer of his desk. “Let’s see what we can shuffle around.”
Fifteen minutes later, Bennett had the next ten days off, and he sat at the table in the big fire house kitchen making a packing list.
“What are you so focused on?” Alex stood over him and looked at the notebook. “You goin’ out of town?”
“Yes,” Bennett said, glancing up. “So you have to take care of Uno. I won’t be able to take him home.” In fact, he had no idea what he’d do with Gemma and Patches. He scrawled Call Yardleys about dogs on his to-do list and went back to listing things he needed to take with him to Seattle. Honestly, it was a big city. He could probably jump in his truck and go right now, if he didn’t have to stay in the fire house tonight.
Plus, he needed to figure out what he was going to say when he found Jennie.
Alex sat at the table with him, a bowl of cereal in front of him. “So you really like this woman.”
“Not talking about it.” Bennett didn’t mean to growl.
“I saw you at the unveiling.”
“So what?” he asked. They hadn’t done anything inappropriate. Held hands. Danced, along with Lauren and Trent, Gene and his wife, and Mabel and Jaime—and dozens of other people. It wasn’t a crime to dance, though Bennett sure had enjoyed holding Jennie right against his chest and whispering about what they might say during the upcoming tour.
“So nothing. It’s just now you’re going to Seattle to see her.”
Bennett looked up, ready for this conversation to be over. “That’s what you’d do too, if your girlfriend lived in a different city.” Even as he spoke, he realized what Jennie had been hiding.
She’d left Hawthorne Harbor and hadn’t said anything.
“It’s just a visit.” He swallowed and ducked his head back to his list. “It’s normal for people to visit each other.”
“Yeah, sure.” Alex shoved another spoonful of cereal in his mouth, and Bennett took his list into the weight room, ready to leave now and he still had hours to go on his shift.
Finally, the next day, after a somewhat restless night in the fire house with Alex snoring on the cot across the room, Bennett had his bags packed and loaded into his truck. “Come on, guys,” he said to the dogs, and he grabbed their leashes, along with a box with their food and a few toys. “We’re going next door.”
He took the animals out the front door, and they ran down the steps and started frolicking on the front lawn. He let them play for a moment, but his impatience to get driving had him calling them to come with him.
Nelly came flying out of the front door before he’d crossed the driveway, her face filled with joy. “Gemma,” she called. “Patches.”
Both dogs trotted ahead to the little girl, who let them lick her face while she giggled. Her mother, Montana, came out on the porch and Bennett climbed the steps to give her the box with food and toys.
“Thank you so much,” he said.
She smiled at him and looked at her daughter. “She’ll do all the work.”
“Still, it means a lot.”
“Where are you headed?” She watched him with interest, as Bennett never traveled.
He rubbed his palm up the back of his head. “Oh, Jennie’s up in Seattle. I’m going to see her.” His voice sounded false, even to him.
Montana grinned at him with kindness in her eyes. “You two are so cute together.”
Bennett didn’t know how to respond, so he just nodded and went back the way he came, stopping to crouch down and talk to Nelly for a moment. He also gave both dogs a good scrub along their ears, and then he got behind the wheel of his truck and set it north.
He arrived in Seattle by lunchtime, his desire to text Jennie and ask her for the best place to eat in the city, and hey, would you like to join me?
He honestly couldn’t predict how she’d react to him driving to Seattle to see her. I should get to say what I want too, he thought, and he picked up his phone and dialed Jennie.
“Hey,” she said. “I’m just sitting down to lunch with my parents.”
That was code for I can’t talk right now.
“Your mom must be doing better,” he said, which was nothing he’d thought about the whole drive to Seattle.
“She is, a little bit.”
“So….” He cleared his throat. “I’m wondering if you have time to have dinner with me.”
“When I get back?”
“No, tonight.”
Silence poured through the line, thick and heavy like honey.
“I’m in Seattle,” he said. “I wanted to see you.”
“Sure,” she said brightly—totally falsely. “I’ll text you later.”
“Sounds good,” he said just as falsely. He had serious doubts that she’d text later, but there wasn’t much he could do about it. Either she would or she wouldn’t.
He drove around a bit, found a great fish and chips shop on the pier, and checked into his hotel before his phone so much as buzzed again.
It was an address, from Jennie, along with a time that said 5:30?
I’ll be there.
I’ll meet you out front, she sent back.
Bennett felt like he’d swallowed live fireworks by the time he pulled up to an apartment building downtown. A woman stood on the front steps, but she didn’t look like Jennie at all. At least not the Jennie who’d left Hawthorne Harbor only four days ago.
This blonde woman had super short hair, with a long piece that hung to her chin on one side while the other side was pretty short. She wore blue jeans with a pink polka dot blouse, flip flops, and a pair of sunglasses.
She came toward his truck when he pulled to a stop, and she walked like Jennie. Bennett could just stare as she opened the door and slid onto the seat. “Hey.”
“You cut your hair.”
“Really? I hadn’t noticed.” She gave him a sly smile and buckled her seatbelt.
“It’s just so…shocking.” It was not the picture of Jennie he held in his head.
“So is you showing up in Seattle.” She looked at him full-on then, her eyebrows lifting above her sunglasses.
“We need to talk,” he said.
“Oh, boy,” she said. “We haven’t even had dinner yet.”
“Do you want to go to dinner?”
“Of course.”
“Tell me where to go.”
She directed him a bit further north, to a vibrant restaurant that had loud music playing and an eclectic menu. Bennett felt like he’d entered an alternate universe, and he simply didn’t like city life.
But he swallowed his thoughts of what dinner would be like in his backyard instead of in this place which was practically impossible to talk.
“So why are you here?” she asked as she unwrapped a straw and put it in her water glass. She didn’t take a drink but simply watched him.
“I heard something in your voice on the phone the other night,” he said. “And I guess I thought it would be better to talk face-to-face.”
Jennie looked away, obviously uncomfortable with the idea. Of course she was, because he was going to say things to upset her.
Starting with, “I have a feeling you’re trying to figure out how to break up with me.”
Her gaze flickered to his and danced away again. “That’s not true.”
“What are you trying to figure out?”
The waiter returned and took their orders, and now Jennie did lift her water glass and take a long pull on the straw. He let her stew, and fidget, and watch the TV mounted behind his head.
“Are you coming back to Hawthorne Harbor?” Bennett almost didn’t want to know the answer. At the same time, he couldn’t stand not knowing.
“Honestly?” She sounded like she might cry, but it was hard to tell with the buzz of activity and the music.
“Honestly, Jennie. I’m not getting any younger.”
“I don’t know.”
Bennett didn’t like that answer, and he didn’t try to hide it. Their food came, and they started eating, this huge elephant between them. Bennett barely tasted anything, and he couldn’t wait to get out of this noise. It was almost like being back in her studio with those fans blowing non-stop.
He had a strong desire to take her hand and pull her close and assure her that he’d be waiting in Hawthorne Harbor whenever she decided what she wanted. But he couldn’t do it. He tucked his hands in his pockets and strolled down the street, glad she wasn’t storming or marching away.
“Tell me what’s going on,” he finally said.
“I need a job, Bennett.” She sounded desperate. “I don’t think I’ll get one in Hawthorne Harbor.”
“So, where does that leave us?”
“I don’t know, Bennett.” She tucked her hand through his elbow, and he let her because it was comforting. They walked for a while, and then he took her back to the apartment. She didn’t get out right away, and Bennett didn’t want her to go.
He felt like his world was being ripped in two—again. Because of Jennie’s desire to be a fantastic artist, just like she’d always dreamed.
What he didn’t understand was why her success in Hawthorne Harbor, at the Magleby Mansion, wasn’t enough for her.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Jennie couldn’t get out of Bennett’s truck. It felt very much like good-bye, and she knew he’d see it that way.
“Can I call you later?” she asked, turning toward him.
“Of course.” Pain flashed across his face, but he leaned toward her and she kissed him, one chaste union that lasted long enough for her to know he thought this was good-bye too.
She pressed her lips together, said, “Okay,” and got out of the truck. She hadn’t said half of what she should’ve. Or maybe her kiss had said it all.
Inside the apartment, her mom had retired, and her dad stood from the couch like he’d been waiting up for her. Her, a forty-one-year-old woman.
“How’s Bennett?”
“Oh, I don’t know.” Jennie exhaled and collapsed onto the couch where her dad had been sitting. “I don’t know what to do about him.”
“Do about him?”
“He’s committed to Hawthorne Harbor. Has a good life there. Dogs. A house he doesn’t have to pay for. I can’t ask him to move here.” She couldn’t, because she currently didn’t have anything here. Not even her own bedroom, and frustration pulled through her as she remembered she’d have to pull out the couch into a bed.
“Why can’t you stay in Hawthorne Harbor?” her father asked.
Did no one get it? “I don’t have a job, Dad.”
“Something will come along.” He gave her a reassuring smile, but Jennie didn’t return it. The lease on her house was up in a few weeks, and she didn’t see the point in renewing it if she didn’t have a reason to stay in town.
What was she supposed to do? Go on blind faith, hoping someone would ask her to make them a vase? Her work at the Mansion had been exquisite, sure. But it wasn’t the type of art people put in their homes, not in a beach-side town like Hawthorne Harbor.
She got up and took the couch cushions off, setting them aside for the moment. She pulled out the mattress, put the couch cushions back on the bed, and collected the quilt she’d been using from the coat closet.
Curling up, Jennie brought the blanket to her chin and stared into the kitchen. The bright green time on the microwave clicked minute by minute, and still no answers came.
Things didn’t seem better in the morning light, and she didn’t call Bennett. He didn’t try to contact her either, and she supposed he’d gone back to his perfect life in Hawthorne Harbor. He’d always known exactly what he wanted, and how to get it. And he had done it.
As she walked down to the pier, thankful for her windbreaker on this stormy morning, she knew his life hadn’t been perfect. He’d wanted to play professional baseball and had only had the opportunity for a limited time. In fact, he’d never been called up from the minors, had lost his marriage because of his injury, and turned to his second choice in life.
Problem was, Jennie wasn’t even sure what her second choice was. The wind coming off the water didn’t tell her, and when it started to rain, she bought an umbrella from a stand and headed back to her parents’ apartment.
A couple of weeks went by, and Jennie visited five more art galleries in Seattle. Only one seemed promising, but the manager there had said they weren’t taking on new art
ists before January. Jennie had rented a small studio space from an artist’s conglomerate and begun work on a few pieces to show him.
Her lease was up on her house in Hawthorne Harbor, but she couldn’t bear the thought of returning to the town where Bennett lived. So the week before Thanksgiving, she called Jason.
“Hey, sis,” he said, panting into the phone.
“Is this a bad time?”
“Just getting off the treadmill.” A loud clank came through the line, and he added, “What’s up?”
“I’m just wondering if you and Kaitlyn and the kids are coming for Thanksgiving.” Not entirely true, though she was wondering that.
“I think so, yes. But we can only come for the day. The Festival of Trees starts the next day, and I’m on the schedule.”
“That’s fine. Mom said she can make a turkey.” Jennie sat on a couch in the posh lobby of the building where her parents lived. The apartment was too small almost all of the time, and she surfed her social media at coffee houses, threw pots in her rented studio, or spent time walking the city.
“Hey, I’m wondering how busy you are, and if you might be able to go clean out my house.” Even as she spoke, Jennie cringed.
“So you’re moving up to Seattle?”
“There’s a gallery here that’s promising,” she said.
“I am not touching anything in that studio,” Jason said. “If I put something in the wrong box, you’ll freak out.”
“I will not.” She didn’t tell him that her best friend had cleaned out her studio in San Francisco. This reeked of the same thing: Her running away from a situation she didn’t want to face.
“I don’t even know what’s yours and what’s not,” he said, proving to be much more difficult than Lisa.
“It’s a bad idea,” Jason continued. “Just come talk to Bennett. You should see him, Jen. He’s…broken.”
She didn’t want to see him like that and know it was her fault. “I’ll figure something else out. Thanks, Jason.”
She started to hang up when he practically yelled, “Jennie, wait.”
“What?” She controlled the sigh she wanted to heave, only letting it leak out in a slow hiss.
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