by Jada Fisher
Place your hand on the map, keep yourself all nice and soft for me. Just smell the incense, okay?
It was probably the sweetest that Dille had ever spoken to her, but Ukrah didn’t have the wherewithal to comment on that. Instead, she watched as the governess placed her small palm against the map, then dopily copied her.
It seemed like nothing happened, but that was okay. Ukrah didn’t worry about it. It wasn’t her job to. All she had to worry about was the pretty smell. So warm and happy and nice. It reminded her of Helena. Where was Helena anyway? Ukrah wanted to hug her. A hug from Helena would probably feel so nice.
She let out a slight giggle to herself, but it fell off as the map under her began to change. The color drained from it, sweeping toward the sides and dripping off the table like spilled ink. She watched, fascinated, as it went from lovingly woven and painted in a plethora of shades to a dull gray.
That’s right, Ukrah. Just breathe. Nice and deep. That’s all you have to do right now.
That was good, because Ukrah was beginning to think that she couldn’t do anything else. Or maybe she couldn’t even think at all. It was all confusing, most of her head being taken up by the delicious, soothing scent.
But then, bit by bit, points of bright white began to dot the map. Most were small, barely bigger than the prick of a pin, but soon larger ones began to appear. The size of a tear. The size of a fingerprint. There was nothing bigger than a gold coin, but there were just so many of all those little white spots. Practically an army but scattered to the four corners of what the pale-faces considered their lands.
Wait… No. She could see them even in the borderlands, and then the wilds beyond that. What was once her home. Was that how her own tribe had gotten onto their anti-magic track? Were the witch hunters just there to hunt down those they considered abominations or spread their doctrine of hate?
For that matter, how many witches were even in the desert? How many young or old souls had suddenly found themselves connected to something they never asked for? How many had the cleansing inadvertently sentenced to a life of hardship? A life of being othered, a target?
Anger started to expand in her mind. Taking up space that the incense was supposed to fill. How dare they! What gave all these little white spots the right to hurt others? It wasn’t right!
Hold on there, you’re slipping. I know it’s hard but breathe in deep. What the white spots are, what they do, doesn’t matter. You don’t need to worry about that right now.
But how could she not worry? Those spots were witch hunters, or maybe it was just all the people who were still part of the sect. The cult. The idiots who still clung to the doctrine of the Three even though it had been proven false by those gods themselves. They were all wrong. All the enemy. How was she supposed to protect, to right the world, if there were so many foes striding to destroy everything?
Breathe, Vessel, breathe. They are only spots on a map. That’s it. Just spots on a map. Breathe in the incense. Float for me. I need you to float. Can you do that?
It was difficult, but Ukrah tried to push down the rising anger and instead took another deep breath. Just spots on a map. That was it.
It took some moments, but then she was settling into that headiness again. Her mind going slack. They were just white dots. Boring little white dots.
There you are. I knew you could do it. Now, what I need you to do is find Eist. She’s hiding in one of those white spots, I promise. That’ll be fun right? Almost like a game.
A…a game? Ukrah liked games. Was Eist hiding? Blind man’s bluff in the map? That was… That didn’t make sense.
But maybe it wasn’t Ukrah’s job to figure out if something made sense or not. All she had to do was find Eist. It would be fun.
But how to find the god-woman? How to find a legend? Ukrah didn’t know, but it was exciting that she didn’t. She liked new things. She liked being challenged.
The incense coiled in her head, making her thoughts heavy. But she didn’t need light thoughts to figure things out. No, she could stay all warm and comfy and in her head and still find Eist.
After all, there was only one Eist. She was all power and longing and melancholy. For being the hero of the entire world, she sure didn’t seem to be happy very often. Or at least any time she had to face anything outside of her own door.
It was something that Ukrah had never wanted to address directly. She admired the woman more than anyone else, and the more that she learned about Lady W’allenhaus, the more impressed she became. But there was an underlying truth that someone couldn’t devour gods and see outside of time itself without it having some sort of consequence.
And one of those consequences was a clear detachment from everything around her.
Because how could she have connections? From what Ukrah knew, the woman had lost her parents when she was young due to the Blight. She’d lost one of her best friend’s in the war. She’d been betrayed, violently wounded, and the council had at one point tried to have her executed.
Even now, people were trying to wipe out witches like her. And even though she didn’t have magic, she still was a witch in their eyes.
No wonder she didn’t trust anyone outside of her very small circle. Ukrah couldn’t blame her, and she didn’t trust anyone outside of Eist’s circle either, but that was also so lonely.
Lonely enough for it to ripple out all around her.
Actually, that was probably a good way to find her. Just search for the loneliness. Because Ukrah wanted to soothe it, to wrap that woman up in blankets too until she was coddled and safe. In fact, why not just cocoon all her friends? Make sure they were surrounded by softness and comfort and never had to hurt again.
Yeah, that was a good idea. Ukrah would find her, and then she would protect the god-woman. It was her turn to take care of things.
She pushed some of the incense out of her mind, searching through more of the white. Eist was there. Her loneliness was there. All Ukrah had to do was find her, and then she could spoil and protect the god-woman.
How she was supposed to spoil the woman who let her stay for free in her home and didn’t accept help from everyone was a bit beyond Ukrah, but she could figure that out when it came to it. First, she had to find her.
So, she searched, and she searched. The white dots on the map burned into her eyes, all starting to blend together until she thought that her eyes might cross. But she continued, time belonging somewhere else, and she scoured over every single spot.
And finally, she found it. The bitter, acidic tint of loneliness. Like a beacon to everything that was the god-woman. A human that gave up everything for those around her and still ended up as something that didn’t quite belong.
“She’s there,” Ukrah said headily, resting her face against the map. She could almost feel Eist. Right there. Right in the white. “I found her.”
“She’s alive?” Athar asked, his voice barely a whisper. The sheer pain in it crowded some of the floaty feeling out of Ukrah’s mind and she blinked at him.
“We already knew that, Athar,” Dille said calmly. “Fior wouldn’t be pacing outside if she was dead.”
Athar closed his eyes, and Ukrah came a little bit back to herself as she noticed tear tracks down his large cheeks. “I know. It’s just…” He trailed off, and it was clear that no one expected him to finish his thought.
“Alight then, Ukrah.” Dille’s voice was back to normal. Less like Tayir’s, more real. “Get your wits together then, we’re about to head out.”
“Goodness,” Helena said, her eyes wide enough that the desert girl was beginning to wonder if they would get stuck that way. “I guess we’re just going to go save the savior of the world. Nothing to make a fuss about.”
9
Common Misconception
It was definitely past the pitch of night when they flew out again, Ukrah sitting in front of Dille, Crispin and Voirdr safely perched on the other dragon with Athar behind them. As for Helena and Cassinda,
they were riding on Ethella, the small redhead seemingly confident as she stood in for the giant.
It was strange to see everyone mixed about, but it was to their advantage. Ethella had been going for so long, carrying all that weight, that asking her to haul the considerable bulk of Athar was going to make her almost useless if it came down to a fight.
And it was going to come down to a fight—Ukrah was sure of it—because that was what her life had become. A series of fights against people who wanted to make the world worse.
“Are we still on the right path?”
Ukrah blinked, drawing her thoughts back to the moment at present. Right, she was leading them toward the feeling she had latched onto. It wasn’t quite like the golden thread. It wasn’t quite like finding Crispin, who she felt so connected to that he was basically another part of her. This was different.
But not so different that she couldn’t do it.
Because while the god-woman was intimidating and a legend and had been through things that Ukrah couldn’t imagine, she did feel a connection with Eist.
Maybe it was because they both had so much blood on their hands from such young ages. Maybe it was because they both had been caught up in magics and gods and fates beyond their hands. Maybe it was because they were somewhere between human and something else, straddling the line so that they could survive things that humans weren’t meant to survive.
But who knew? She supposed at the moment, it wasn’t important. No, the only thing that mattered was finding Eist before…
She didn’t finish that thought, just nodding to Dille and refocusing on the path.
Her body was aching, but she dismissed that too. She was a vessel. Sometimes vessels got cracked or damaged, but that didn’t matter. What mattered was her purpose.
Thankfully, the ride was not long. The closer they drew, the more the pull increased, until she almost felt as if she was going to be yanked off their mount.
But Dille’s strong, thin arms wrapped around her middle, pulling her back against the woman’s chest. The governess’s heartbeat steadied her, giving herself something solid and sturdy to hold onto.
“Thank you,” Ukrah whispered, closing her eyes and trying to focus only on the path.
“Just breathe. You’ll get us there, and we’ll find her, and then we’ll get her to safety.”
“It’s just that easy, huh?”
The woman offered possibly the driest chuckle that Ukrah had ever heard. “It’s just that easy.”
They fell into silence after that, and not much later, mountains began to bloom on the edge of what Ukrah could see ahead, the faintest rays of sunlight making the peaks glow umber.
“We’ll set down here,” Dille called, directing her mount to descend toward the thick tree line. “We don’t want them to see us and flee. Or…do anything rash.”
Ukrah didn’t need to ask what ‘anything rash’ was. She just swallowed down her fear and steeled herself for battle.
Because she would fight. She’d fight to the death for Eist, and she hoped the woman knew it.
How could she not?
She found herself only half-listening as the others planned what they were going to do. She knew she could concentrate, but it felt like she was still shaking much of the fog from her head. Whatever trance Dille had put her in to see the map had been strange, that was for certain. Ukrah wondered if that was how people felt when they were drunk, because it wasn’t anything she liked at all. She had far too much to do to be standing there all emptyheaded and listless. Even as the plan was laid out in front of her, it just washed over her like water, nothing to hold on to or take root in.
The same thing just kept playing over and over in her head. She needed to get to Eist. They needed to save her. And that was that.
They crept silently through the thinning trees that led up to the small mountain range. Ukrah knew that they were north. So far north that there weren’t any city or villages left and if they rode just another hour more, they would be in the unlivable lands of the frost.
No one lived in the frost. It wasn’t like the wilds of Ukrah’s home. It was so cold, so bitter, that dragons couldn’t survive there, neither could plants or animals. Just bitter, bitter cold, snow, and biting winds.
It was a good place to keep a magic user with a dragon rider, where few were going to know the area or were even liable to go. It made her wonder how many of the witch hunters were on the northern rim. She hadn’t seen many white dots there, but the mountains she was staring at had been on the very, very edge of the map. What if there was more beyond there?
What if indeed. Maybe she and Dille would have to talk at about it once Eist was back home safe and everything was all said and done. She just had to hold onto the thought and not let it disappear into the spirit in her head.
They moved carefully, quietly. She was only half-present for it as they scaled up a short set of rocks and up onto a ledge. From there, Dille had them flatten down on their fronts, pointing to a couple of lumpy shapes just a bit in the distance on another, much smaller ledge.
Ukrah had to blink several times before she realized those lumpy shapes were actually heavy cloaks that had been meticulously painted to look like the rock surrounding them.
Lookouts.
The desert girl pressed her head against the rock, feeling the rough, cool texture against her cheek. She couldn’t figure out how they were supposed to get to the three shapes without giving themselves away. It wasn’t like the city, where they had essentially conned their way in.
For one, these men weren’t in the business of letting anyone through, she was sure. Secondly, they were religious fanatics, crazy enough to want to wipe out an entire group of people just for existing. They knew all their own number and no doubt had secret signals and codes.
But her worry faded as Dille reached out, pressing her hand into the rock to their side. Ukrah couldn’t see anything, but she could feel something spark through the air.
A beat later, the three shapes stood ramrod straight, one of them tumbling out of their hiding spot. There was no noise, no furor, and the next thing Ukrah knew, they had all collapsed.
“Localized sleeping spell,” Dille whispered. “It doesn’t always work. We got lucky.”
“What would have happened if it hadn’t worked?” Crispin muttered.
“Then I would have had to use a spell that wouldn’t allow us to collect them and interrogate them later.”
Ah. Right. She would have killed them. Ukrah was so tired of all the death, all the killing, but with enemies mounting and things going so wrong, she didn’t see it dying down any time soon.
“Come, we should hurry. We have no idea where they are in their watch shift changes.”
And so that was exactly what they did, scrambling over the rocks and hauling the men off to the side. Dille took their cloaks, handing them to Athar, Cassinda and Crispin, then tore one of the men’s tunics to make bonds for their hands and feet.
Ukrah knew why she didn’t get one. Her darker coloring made her less of a target than the pale faces of her companions, or Crispin and Cassinda’s bright hair. It was too bad they didn’t have something for Helena, but at least her dark hair and ruddy coloring wouldn’t have her sticking out like candles.
Crouched low, they slid through the entrance, which was a craggy gap in the rock barely wider than Ukrah’s shoulders. Athar certainly didn’t have an easy time getting through, but eventually, they did pop out of the other side into a roughly-hewn tunnel. There were torches around, but it was clear that the formation of the cave was far older than any of the equipment lighting it.
Dille held her finger to her lips, not that she needed to, and they moved forward again.
They didn’t have to go far. The hall dropped off suddenly, the ledge overlooking a wide cavern. They all went to their bellies again, crawling forward to look over the lip.
There were indeed men down below, all armed and in full regalia of what she would imagine wit
ch hunters would look like. And then there, in the corner, sat Eist.
And she was not looking good.
She wasn’t beaten, as far as Ukrah could tell, her face only sporting a split lip, but she was covered in sweat and her face was deathly pale. Dark circles under her eyes were visible from even across the cave while her breath seemed to be coming hard. She was in her night clothes, and they were stuck to her like a second skin, like she had either sweated through them or someone had poured water over her head.
Athar tensed beside Ukrah, but Dille caught his arm. “Hold on. We need to get down there without any of them getting to Eist. They will kill her rather than letting her be taken.”
“Why haven’t they killed her already?” Helena murmured. “If these are people from the sect, she’s enemy number one, isn’t she? The woman who killed their gods?”
“If I had to guess, I would say a ritual. Either a sacrifice to the Three or some form of revenge. It’s why they’re holding out, but if that opportunity lapses, I don’t think they’re above just slitting her throat right here and now.”
“That’s my wife,” Athar hissed, a surprising amount of vehemence packed into his quiet hiss.
“And that’s my best friend that I’ve been destined to meet over three lifetimes. Doesn’t change the facts. We need some way to get over to her.”
“I can do it,” Crispin said, pulling his cloak tighter around his shoulders as he wiggled a little farther forward. “I’m pretty lucky.”
“Crispin, you literally were kidnapped by people who wanted to kill you the first time you went into town on your own. You nearly died, nearly went blind, and nearly got Ukrah killed.”
“That was different. Those people were looking for me and had the whole area staked out. These guys have no idea that I’m here.”
“So what?” Ukrah asked, feeling that familiar anxiety rising within her. “You’re just gonna jump down and sprint for it?”
“Nah,” he said with a shake of his head. “Figure I’d climb. The only part I’m worried about is coming down the wall behind her. I’ll probably need a distraction.”