by Wilder, L.
The first year after her death was the hardest, but by the second, we’d finally started to recover. We all turned our focus to the farm and eventually managed to find our way back to our old routines. Things were just starting to get back to normal when lightning struck our barn, causing it to catch fire. The blaze quickly grew out of control, and before we could put out the flames, we not only lost our barn, but we also lost Prancer, one of our very best stallions. I thought our days of raising and breeding horses were over, but I was wrong.
Just days after the fire, my father started rebuilding the barn, making it even bigger and better than before. He made plans to start the breeding process with one of our other stallions, Casper’s Run, thinking that he would sire many beautiful, healthy foals. Unfortunately, that didn’t happen. Casper was never the same after the fire. After several months with no foals being born, my father had to accept the fact that he was no longer able to reproduce. That’s when he decided it was time to buy a new stallion, but not just any stallion. He wanted to buy Requiem—a three-year-old chestnut stallion who was known in Australia for being a phenomenal show horse. His sire potential was off the charts, but buying a horse like him would take an unbelievable amount of money. I didn’t know all the ins and outs of the financial side of the farm. Dad kept that to himself, but it didn’t take a numbers wizard to see that it was a huge risk to buy such an expensive stallion.
I can still remember the day I finally decided to voice my concern to my brother. It was a day I would never forget. My greatest joy would become my greatest disappointment—the day I realized my father wasn’t the man I’d always thought him to be.
When I got out to the stables, I found Hunter humming to the melody coming through his headphones as he cleaned out one of the stalls. He was wearing his typical Wrangler jeans with a dark-colored t-shirt and a Cubs baseball hat, and he was completely oblivious that I’d walked up behind him. Hoping to get his attention, I picked up one of his old gloves and tossed it at him. When it hit him in the side of the head, he turned towards me with a startled jolt. With his pitchfork pointed right at me, he shouted, “What the hell, Riley?”
I waited for him to remove his headphones before I said, “Sorry. I didn’t mean to spook ya, big brother.”
“You didn’t spook me, smart one.”
“Really? So, you make a habit of jumping a mile high whenever someone tosses a glove in your direction?” I asked with sarcasm.
His dark-blue eyes narrowed as he grumbled, “How ’bout you get off my ass and just tell me what you want.”
“Did you know that Dad was planning on buying a new stallion?”
“Yeah. He mentioned something about it.”
“And?”
“And what?”
“What do you think about it?”
“I’m guessing from the look on your face that you aren’t exactly keen on the idea.”
“No. Actually, I’m not.”
He turned his attention back to the messy stall, and as he scooped up a pitchfork full of straw, he asked, “And why’s that? We haven’t bred a foal in months. We need a new stallion around here.”
“I agree, but Requiem isn’t just any stallion, Hunter. That horse is going to cost us fortune, and we haven’t sold a foal in over six months! God only knows what Dad spent on rebuilding this barn, and Mom’s medical bills were astronomical!”
“Yeah, well, there’s this thing called ‘insurance,’ Riley. Ever heard of it?”
“Yeah, I’ve heard of it, smart-ass, but if I had my guess, I’d say that the insurance didn’t cover half of the cost of that barn. And Mom’s last few treatments were considered experimental, so insurance wouldn’t cover it. Add in the costs of the funeral and my college tuition and …”
“Just give it a rest, Riley. You don’t have a clue about what really goes on around here. You’re too wrapped in your big, fancy college degree to even care. You focus on your studies and stop worrying about how we do things around here,” he huffed.
I might’ve been younger than Hunter, but I wasn’t just some naïve kid who had her head in the clouds. I’d been helping out at the farm since I could walk, and through the years I’d learned how things worked. I was also a few months away from getting my finance degree. I knew the kind of money a strong, healthy foal like one of ours could bring, but I also knew how much it cost to breed them. The in vitro, the veterinarian’s fees, our farmhands’ salaries—just basic feeding and maintenance costs could be substantial. There were times when we should’ve been just breaking even, but in the past couple of years, we were spending money like we were making it hand over fist. The barn expansion, the extra hired hands, and now the purchase of a million-dollar horse. Things just weren’t adding up. I knew something wasn’t right, and I could feel it in my gut. I placed my hands on my hips as I huffed, “Okay. Then enlighten me, big brother, because I know for a fact that things aren’t adding up.”
“Dad has always taken care of everything. Stop asking questions that you shouldn’t even be asking, and just let him handle it.”
“Why don’t you just tell her?” a voice called out behind me. When I turned around, I spotted Travis, one of our horse trainers and my brother’s best friend, walking in our direction. I glanced over at him and groaned when I saw the snarky expression on his face. He’d been working at the farm for years and acted like he knew more than anyone, especially me. I couldn’t understand why my brother chose him to be his best friend. To me, they seemed like polar opposites. While my brother was all about making a good impression and being the best he could be, Travis was the black sheep of his family. If there was trouble to be found, he’d find it, especially if there was a girl involved. I always thought of him as a selfish asshole, but Hunter saw another side to him—a side I’d never had the pleasure of seeing and doubted that I ever would. Travis only cared about Travis, and I hoped that my brother would figure it out.
Hunter gave him a warning look as he asked, “And what do you know about it anyway?”
“I know plenty, Hunter. It’s not like your dad has been trying to hide it,” Travis argued. “I’ve seen what’s been going on.”
“I haven’t seen anything,” I added.
“That’s because your always at school when …”
“Travis!” Hunter clenched his fist at his side and shouted, “It’s nothing, Riley. Just go back to the house and get ready for class.”
“It’s clearly something. I just don’t get why you won’t tell me what it is.”
“Not now. Just go inside and get ready, Riley,” Hunter demanded.
“It’s not like y’all are going to be able to hide it forever, so you might as well tell her.”
Hunter’s expression softened, and for a split second, I actually thought he might spill the beans, but all hopes of that died when my father came walking into the barn. His tone was foreboding as he said, “Travis, I didn’t realize you were working today.”
“I wanted to get an early start,” he answered with a nervous smile. “How you making it this morning?”
“I’d be better if I could get the tractor up and running.” Then he turned to my brother. “I’m gonna need a hand if you’re done cleaning out the stalls.”
“Yeah, I’m done,” he answered and leaned his pitchfork against the wall. “Do you need me to grab your tool bag?”
“It’s out in the shed. Travis … why don’t you give him a hand?”
“Sure thing.”
When they all started outside, I quickly asked, “Is there anything you need me to do?”
“You can go get ready for class like your brother told you to.”
My stomach twisted into a knot when I realized that he’d heard some, if not all, of our conversation. I gave him a quick nod, and before I started back towards the house, I replied, “Yes, sir.”
“And Riley?”
“Um-hmm?”
His voice was full of warning as he growled, “If you have a question about this
farm or how I run it, you come ask me about it … not your brother. You got me?”
“Yes, sir. I understand.”
I knew my father well enough to know that he was saying one thing but meant something else altogether. He didn’t want me asking questions of any kind—not to my brother and especially not to him. If I wanted to know what was really going on, I would have to find out on my own, and that’s exactly what I intended to do. I went back into the house, and after I got changed, I headed out to my car. Before I drove off, I waved to the guys, making them think that I was headed to campus, but it was all for show. I had no intention of going anywhere. I backed out of the driveway and started down the main road. After driving about a mile, I pulled behind an old, abandoned house that was just down the road and parked. I grabbed my phone and got out of the car. Hoping I’d go unnoticed, I trudged through the cornfield back towards our house. It took some careful maneuvering, but I was able make it over to the old treehouse my father had built me when I was a kid. It was just a few yards away from the barn, but I managed to get inside without anyone seeing me. When I looked out the small, side window, I had a clear view of the house and the stables. I had no idea what I was expecting to see, but I certainly never thought I’d find out that my father had been deceiving me for years.
I’d been sitting up in that damn treehouse for over an hour, and I hadn’t seen anything that looked suspicious. My father and Hunter were working on the tractor while the farmhands tended to the mares. I thought it was just going to be another typical day until I saw a black SUV with dark-tinted windows coming down our drive. Like they’d done it many times before, they pulled up to the back of the barn and waited as my father made his way over to them. As soon as he approached the vehicle, the driver lowered his window. “You got the goods?”
“I do, and I also have a few new options your boss might be interested in.”
“Let’s see what you’ve got.”
“You got it.”
With that, my father and Hunter disappeared into the tool shed, and moments later, they came out with a dolly carrying four large wooden crates. The SUV’s door opened, and a tall African-American male with a thick goatee got out and stood next to my father. He looked out of place in his baggy jeans and thick, gold chains, especially since my father was wearing a pair of old coveralls with stained knees and a tattered hem. The stranger seemed eager to see what my father had to show him and leaned over him as he opened the crate. I could feel my pulse racing as I watched him reach into the wooden box and pull out a large rifle. As the man took the weapon from my father’s hand, he asked, “How many do you have in this shipment?”
“We’ve got fifteen Colt AR-15 rifles and another fifteen of the Ruger 10/22 rifles with pistol grips,” he answered as he reached inside the crate again. He pulled out a different weapon, this one smaller, like a pistol with an odd-shaped barrel. “And I just got these beauties in last week.”
“Intratec DC-9s?”
“That’s right … with a barrel extension and a 32-round magazine. I’ve got twenty-five I’m looking to unload,” he answered proudly.
“How many more can you get your hands on?”
“Can’t say for sure, but I’ll tell you this, Devon. These are hot ticket items. If your boss is interested, he better act fast before they’re gone,” my father warned.
“I’ll let him know.”
“All right, then.” He returned the weapon back into the crate, then told him, “Today’s shipment will be 10K as usual.”
The man reached into his pocket and pulled out a large wad of cash. As he offered it to my dad, he said, “I’ll be in touch about the others.”
They loaded the crate into the back of the SUV, and then the man was on his way. I couldn’t believe what I’d just seen as I sat there for several minutes in utter dismay. Once the SUV was no longer in sight, I glanced back over at my father, and it was all I could do to keep myself from crying. I’d always thought he was a good, decent man who always tried to do the right thing, and it broke my heart to discover that I was wrong. He wasn’t a good man. He wasn’t a man I could look up to and respect. My father was a gun-trafficker—a criminal who risked his life and others’ just to make a damn dollar, and to make matters worse, he’d involved his own son in his wrongdoings. I thought back to the moment when I asked Hunter what was going on with Dad and the farm, and I couldn’t believe that he’d lied straight to my face. They’d both lied to me, deceived me in unforgivable ways, and I couldn’t help but wonder if they’d lied to Mom as well. The more I thought about it, the angrier I became. Before I even realized what I was doing, I was climbing down from the treehouse and headed in their direction. Rage consumed me as I charged up to my father and shouted, “Did she know what you are doing?”
“Riley? What the hell are you doing here?”
“Answer the question, Dad,” I demanded. “Did Mom know what you and Hunter are doing?”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about the guns,” I spat. “Did she know you were selling illegal weapons, or did you lie to her like you’ve been lying to me?”
“But how did you know?” He turned to Hunter and growled, “Did you tell her?”
“No one told me. I was here … I saw it all for myself!”
“You were here? I thought you’d gone to class.”
“Well, I didn’t, and now, I know everything. I know about the guns … about the money.” I tried to fight back my tears as I cried, “My God. What were you thinking? How could you get involved with something like this?”
“I didn’t have a choice, Lee.” I could hear the sincerity in his voice when he said, “We were in real trouble. Money wasn’t coming in like it used to and with all the different expenses, we were going broke. Then, your momma got sick. You know how much she meant to me … how much she meant to all of us. I didn’t want to lose her, so I did what I had to do to get the money for her treatments.”
My anger started to subside when I heard the anguish in his voice. I’d always known that he would do anything for us, but I never dreamed he would go to such extremes. There were so many things going through my head at once, making it difficult to know what to say. After several minutes, Hunter looked over to me and said, “Don’t you see? He did all of this for us, so we didn’t lose the farm … so we could keep a roof over our heads and you could go to college. It wasn’t an easy decision to make, but he did what he had to do.”
My words were strained as I asked, “But selling guns? Wasn’t there another way?”
“The opportunity arose, and I took it.” Dad stepped towards me as he said, “I know it was the wrong thing to do, and I promise you, Lee, we’re gonna stop. You have my word on that.”
“But when? How much longer are you planning to do this?”
“Not much longer. We just need to sell a few more shipments so we can buy Requiem. Once we have him and start breeding him, we’ll be set. Then the farm will be able to sustain itself, and we’ll be done with this gun thing forever.”
While I knew he had good intentions and was trying to do the right thing by his family, he’d gone about it in all the wrong ways. He’d lied to me, deceived me, and on top of that, he’d gotten my brother involved. It would take some time for me to trust him again, but in the end, he was still my dad. I loved him, and because of that I would have to find a way to forgive him and to accept things for what they were. As I wiped the tears from my cheeks, I looked up at him and said, “I hope you know I’m going to hold you to that promise. This thing you’re doing is dangerous. These people who are buying these guns are criminals. They aren’t like us.”
“I know that, sweetheart, but I’m always careful about who I do business with.”
“Good, because I don’t know what I would do if something happened to either one of you.”
“Nothing’s going to happen to us. You’ll see.”
CHAPTER 3
Murphy
The days
that followed the shooting were chaotic at best. After Gus and the others arrived at Jed’s cabin, we headed out back to tend to our fallen brother, Crow. I’d hoped that we would be able to bury him in the club’s cemetery, where the other brothers could be present, but we were almost six hours from Memphis and it was simply too risky to try to move him that far. Once the trial was over and everyone was back home, we would have a celebration-of-life gathering for him. I hated that we couldn’t do more for him, but I knew Crow wouldn’t want us to fuss over him. We were the only family that he had, and we’d make damn sure to pay our respects whenever we’d come to stay at the cabin. With heavy hearts, we had taken him over to Jed’s family plot and buried him in the grave that Jed had gotten ready for him. After Gus had said a few words, we headed back inside and started making preparations to take Reece and Tate to Washington.