by Wilder, L.
The notion didn’t sit well with me. Instead, it made me feel even worse. I became angry and bitter, and my only solace was planning his demise—figuratively speaking, of course. I didn’t want the man dead. I just wanted him out of my head, but it wouldn’t be easy, not when it came to a man like Murphy. Thankfully, I had help. After I told Grady everything about Murphy—minus the fact that he was a biker and most likely a criminal—he insisted that I come down for a visit, promising a night that would erase all thoughts of Murphy. I was about to go upstairs to get ready when I heard my father talking in his office. The serious tone in his voice made me concerned that something might be wrong, so I eased over to the closed door and tried to listen to what he was saying.
He sounded hopeful as he asked, “Did the last shipment meet your expectations?”
There was a brief pause before I heard him say, “Good. I’m glad to hear it. I know your boys were concerned, especially that Murphy fella, but I was hoping you’d be pleased with the product.”
At the sound of Murphy’s name, I became even more curious and stepped closer to the door. “Yes. I understood why he’d be worried about that, and if I planned to stay in this much longer, I might consider making some changes, but the truth is … I’m thinking it’s about time to shut this thing down. Not until I get you the goods you requested, of course, but soon after.”
There was another brief pause before he continued, “Well, I’m hoping that won’t be a problem, but if it does become an issue, I’ll handle it.”
There were a few “um-hmms” and “hmphs” before my father said, “Sounds good. I’ll have them to you by the end of next week. Thanks, Gus.”
He hung up the phone, and moments later, he came barreling out of his office. Fortunately, I’d already made it back to the kitchen, and he had no idea I’d been eavesdropping. He grabbed his coat off the hook and started for the backdoor. Before he had a chance to open the door, I called out to him, “Hey, Dad?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m not gonna be home tonight. I’m heading into Memphis to hang out with Grady.”
Too preoccupied to care, he just mumbled, “Okay.”
“I’ll be back in the morning.”
“You two have fun, but be careful.”
With that, he walked out and shut the door behind him. I eased over to the window and watched as he headed out to the stables. As soon as he was out of sight, I rushed into his office and grabbed his cellphone off his desk, quickly searching for the number of his last call. Once I found the number, I wrote it down on a slip of paper and put in my back pocket. I had no idea what I planned to do with Gus’s phone number, but somehow, having it made me feel more in control. I put my father’s phone back on his desk and was about to run upstairs when Hunter asked, “What are you doing?”
I came to a screeching halt as I answered, “Umm … nothing.”
“Looks like something to me.”
“Well, I hate to break it to you, but you’re mistaken.”
As I started passed him, he asked, “Did I hear you say you were going to see Grady tonight?”
“Yes. I’m leaving as soon as I get out of the shower. Why?”
“I had something I wanted to talk to you about, but it can wait.”
“You sure?”
He nodded. “Yeah, it’s no big deal. Tell Grady I said hi.”
“Okay, I will.”
I started up the stairs, and when I got up to my room, I took the paper out of my back pocket and studied it for a moment. I was such an idiot. There was no way I could call that number without looking completely and totally desperate. I crumpled it up in my hand and was about to toss it into the trash, when I stopped myself and put it in my purse instead.
Pretending that I hadn’t just done something stupid, I headed into the bathroom and took a hot shower. When I got out, I was feeling a little anxious, so it took me longer than usual to find something to wear. Once I’d decided on the perfect outfit, I started to work on my hair and makeup. By the time I was done, it was after nine. Knowing how Grady hated it when I was late, I grabbed my things and rushed downstairs. After I said goodbye to Dad, I hurried out to my car, and in no time, I was on the interstate. Half an hour later, I arrived at the Smoking Gun, and just as I had hoped, it was packed tight—exactly what I needed to take my mind off Murphy.
With a confident smile, I zig-zagged through the crowd towards the back of the bar. As soon as I spotted Grady, I went over to him and said, “What’s shakin’ bacon?”
He cocked his eyebrow at me. “You’re in an awfully good mood.”
“No, I’m not, but I plan to be real soon.” I motioned towards the bar as I told him, “I need a drink.”
“Okay … You want a long island or something stronger?”
“A long island will do for now.”
“You got it.” After he placed our drink order, he led me over to a table in the back. Once we were seated, he leaned back to check out my outfit. “I can’t remember the last time I’ve seen you so dolled up. You trying to impress someone?”
I glanced down at my little black dress and heels. “I didn’t think it would hurt to put in a little extra effort.”
“Well, the extra effort paid off!” The waitress brought over our drinks, and as soon as she placed them on the table, I looked up at her and said, “I’m going to need another one.”
“So, you’re planning to just drink him outta your mind?”
“Maybe,” I answered as I leaned forward and took a quick glance around the bar.
“You looking for him?”
When I realized what I was doing, I sat back with a huff and grumbled, “Good grief. What the hell is wrong with me?”
“Nothing is wrong with you, Lee. You got your hopes up over this guy, and that’s completely understandable,” he assured me. “You can’t help that he was an asshole and ghosted you.”
Grady was right. Murphy had ghosted me. It was the perfect word for what he’d done. He was there one minute, all sweet and charming, then gone the next—disappearing like he’d never existed. I took a long sip of my drink before I replied, “It’s my fault. We only talked for a couple of hours. I don’t even know the guy … not really. I shouldn’t have let myself get carried away, but I’m over it now.”
“No, you’re not, but you will be.”
I let out a deep breath and said, “You know, finding the right guy shouldn’t be this hard.”
“No, it shouldn’t.” He shrugged innocently and added, “And you wonder why I don’t do relationships.”
“I’m beginning to think you’re right. Relationships are for the birds.”
“Exactly.”
As we discussed all the reasons why relationships sucked, I finished off my first drink, then a second, and was well on my way with the third. I was just starting to feel the effects of the alcohol when another round appeared on our table. Even though I’d have a few from time to time, I’d never been a big drinker, so it didn’t take much for me to get completely wasted. I knew that I should slow down, especially since I was drinking on an empty stomach, but it was nice to cut loose and forget about things for a while. Besides, with Grady at my side, I didn’t have to worry about doing anything I would come to regret—or so I thought. I’d just started on my fourth drink when I started to feel really lightheaded. Thinking it might help to walk around a bit, I grabbed my purse and said, “I’m going to the ladies’ room.”
When he saw that I was a little wobbly, Grady asked, “Do you need a hand?”
“No, I’m fine.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m fine, Grady. I’ve only had … like two drinks,” I fussed.
“You’ve had more than two, and they were really strong.”
“They weren’t that strong.” As I started towards the bathroom, I told him, “Stop your worrying. I’ll be right back.”
Trying my best not to run into anyone, I continued towards the back of the bar where the restrooms w
ere located. Between the crowd of people and the loud music, I was starting to feel a little claustrophobic, which didn’t help my spinning head. I was hoping to escape in the bathroom stall, but the line was wrapped around the corner. I tried to wait it out, but as I stood there, I couldn’t help but notice all the different couples that were huddled up together. They all seemed so happy, so in love, and just looking at them filled me with a sense of hopelessness. I’d only had two relationships in my life, and they’d both ended in heartbreak. Then Mom died, and I gave up trying to find my Mr. Right. Until Murphy, it had been over a year since I’d met anyone who’d interested me, and even then, it was short lived. As soon as the guy opened his mouth, I saw that he was just another arrogant asshole, and I lost all interest in seeing him again. As I glanced back over at one of the couples kissing in the corner, I was hit with the revelation that it was my own fault that I was alone. I’d been too guarded, too resistant to finding anyone to love, and when I finally did let someone in, I’d chosen the wrong man.
I was teetering on the edge of tipsy and more towards drunk, which wasn’t the best time for such a revelation. I wasn’t thinking clearly, and all the self-loathing was making me feel like the walls were closing in on me. I needed to get some air before I completely lost it. Relief washed over me when I noticed a backdoor. Without a moment’s hesitation, I rushed past the long line and darted outside. Even though it was dark and not exactly safe, the cold air did wonders to clear my head. I leaned back against the brick wall, and after several deep breaths, I was starting to feel better. Worried that Grady might wonder where I’d gone, I reached into my purse for my cell phone. As I pulled it out, I spotted the crumpled slip of paper that I’d written Gus’s number on. I started to think about how rejected and hurt I’d been feeling over the last couple of weeks. It infuriated me that I’d let Murphy get to me the way he had. The more I thought about it, the angrier I became. Before I realized what I was doing, I’d taken the paper out of my purse and was dialing his number. Seconds later, I heard a man’s voice answer, “Yeah?”
“Um … This Gus?” I stammered.
“Who’s asking?”
“I’m askin’.”
“And who might you be.”
“I’m might be Riley,” I slurred, paying absolutely no mind to the anger I heard in his voice.
“Riley who? And how the hell did you get this number?”
There was no way I could tell him that I stole the number from my father, so I just pushed forward. “I need to talk to Murphyyy.”
“Did you say Murphy?”
“Yessir … Murrr-phyy. He’s this biker guy. Is he around?”
“Um-hmm.” He paused for a moment, then said, “Let me see if I can track him down.”
I could hear men talking in the background, but I couldn’t make out what they were saying—partly because it was muffled and partly because I was three sheets to the wind. I was fighting to keep my concentration when I heard Murphy’s voice say, “Riley?”
“Hellooo, Murphyyy,” I sassed. “Is s’good to know you’re alive and well.”
“Did you know you were calling Gus’s number?” he snapped.
“Mayy-be I did. Mayy-be I didn’.”
“What the hell were you thinking? You don’t just call the president of Satan’s Fury without having a good fucking reason, Riley!”
“I did have a g’reason, Murr-pphy! I’ve got sumthin I need to say to you. Then, I’m done.” I had no idea if he could even understand me with all my slurred words, but I didn’t care. I needed to clear my chest, so I told him, “You might be a big, rrrough an tough biker guy with gorrrgeous, baby blues and great ass … but that doesn’t give you the right to be a complete jerk. And to think I actually thought you were a nice guy. Can you believe that? … I mean, I actually liked you! I wa ‘slooking forward to seeing you again, but yooo had to go and blow me off.”
“Have you been drinking?”
“Yep, and I’m about to drink me s’more.”
His voice was low and threatening as he asked, “Where are you?”
Ignoring his question, I asked, “You know wha’s really crazy? I actually thought you liked me, too. How sad is that?”
“Riley,” he warned.
“You ghosted me, Murphyyy. Do you know wha’ that means?” Before he could answer, I snapped, “It means, yooo made me like you, and then you disappeared … I had no idea if you were alive or dead, but whatever. I get it. You aren’t interested, and I’m tow-tahh-ly fine with that. Seriously. Do what you gotta do. As for me, I’m gonna have myself a grand old time and forget—”
Before I could finish my sentence, he barked, “Riley, where the fuck are you?”
I was just about to answer when the backdoor flew open, filling the alley with the sounds of people talking and loud music. As Grady stepped outside, he shouted, “Riley! I’ve been looking all over the bar for you. What the hell are you doing out here?”
I held up my cellphone as I sassed, “Uh … I’m on the phone, Gradyyy.”
“Well, get off the damn phone. It’s thirty degrees out here and you’re not wearing a fucking coat!”
“I’m jus’ fine!”
“You’re lips are blue, Lee. Stop acting like a child and get your ass inside.”
“Fine! Jus’ give me a second.” I brought the phone back up to my ear and said, “Hey, Murphyy, I gotta go.”
I waited for some kind of response, but I got nothing—just dead air. When I saw the disapproving look on Grady’s face, I could tell he was upset with me. As I started towards him, I shrugged. “I’m not on the phone any moooorrree.”
“Come on. Let’s get back inside.” I followed him back over to our table, and as soon as I sat down, he gave me one of his looks. “I’m not going to tell you that you made a huge mistake by calling him, because you’ll figure that out tomorrow.”
“He s’gonna think I’m a raging lunatic.”
“Maybe, but who cares what he thinks.” He placed his hand on mine as he said, “You are an amazing woman, Riley Nichols. Any guy who can’t see that isn’t worth having.”
“I know.”
“Then act like it and forget about the douchebag.”
I let out a deep breath. “Okayyy. You’re right. I’m over it.”
“Good.” When I reached for my drink, he placed his hand on my arm and said, “Easy killer. You need to slow down with the booze.”
“Yeah, I probably should, but my buzz is starting to wear off and that’s the last thing I need right now.” I took a big gulp of my drink and hiccuped before I smiled and said, “But I’ll try to behave.”
“I’m going to hold you to that.”
As I looked over towards the bar, I asked, “Is Earl working tonight?”
“I thought you were going to behave.”
“I was just asking a question. Jeez,” I complained.
Just as he was about to respond, one of his bouncers came rushing over to Grady. “Hey, boss. We’ve got a problem.”
“What kind of problem?” Grady growled.
He was talking a mile a minute as he explained, “Some guy fell down the front steps. He busted his ass pretty good, and now, he’s threatening to sue!”
“On what grounds? He wasn’t drunk enough?” Grady scoffed.
“No, sir. I think this guy is a lawyer or something.” The bouncer’s eyes were wide with panic as he said, “He started spouting off some city penal codes about it being mandatory to clear off any and all ice from the front entrance of the building. I don’t know if that’s true or if he’s just pissed.”
“Well, fuck.” Grady looked over to me as he said, “I’m sorry, Riley, but I’ve gotta go see about this guy.”
“It’s fine. Go ahead.”
“I’ll be back as quick as I can.” As he stood up, he demanded, “Do not move from the spot. Is that understood.”
“Understood.”
I watched as he followed the bouncer towards the front door. When they
were both out of my line of sight, I turned my attention back to my drink. As I took another sip of my long island, my mind drifted back to my phone call with Murphy. I might regret it more tomorrow, but I was glad I’d gotten everything off my chest. As I tried to focus on the song that was playing, I took another long drink and then another and another. It wasn’t long before that woozy feeling returned, and I was swaying to the rhythm of the music. All was well in the world until I caught the attention of a sleaze-ball with slicked-back hair and a thick gold chain. When I noticed him eyeing me from across the room, I quickly turned and looked in the other direction, hoping that he’d get the hint that I wasn’t interested. Sadly, he didn’t let my disinterest stop him from approaching my table. At the time, I didn’t know it, but my night was about to take a drastic turn.
CHAPTER 9
Murphy
When it came to Riley Nichols, it wasn’t about wanting something I couldn’t have. It was wanting something I shouldn’t want. Knowing what was at stake, I’d done everything in my power to shake the pull I felt towards her, but no matter how hard I tried, she’d always find a way to slip back into my thoughts. The whole thing was driving me over the edge, and when she called, it was like throwing fuel onto the fire. As soon as I heard the sound of her voice, all I could think about was getting to her. I needed to lay my eyes on her, see for myself that she was okay, but from the way she was going off on me, it was doubtful that she’d be happy about seeing me. I wasn’t surprised that she was angry. Hell, I would’ve felt the same if I was in her shoes, but I didn’t expect her to call me out, and I certainly didn’t expect her to use Gus’s phone to do it. Oddly enough, Gus wasn’t nearly as surprised as I was. I had no idea how, but he’d known from the start that Riley struck a chord with me. While he had his concerns about me becoming involved with our new supplier’s daughter, he trusted me, knowing I’d never do anything to jeopardize my brothers or the club.