by L. A. Witt
“So, out of curiosity.” I gestured at my face as Aiden turned toward me. “What happened? To your, uh…”
“This?” He gestured at the bandaged cut.
I nodded.
His cheeks colored, and he lowered his gaze. “It’s a long story.” Though he didn’t say it, the and I don’t want to tell it came through loud and clear.
Awkward silence fell.
I was about to break the silence when Aiden cleared his throat and beat me to the punch. “Listen, uh, I’ll probably need to get back to the base after we eat. Early morning tomorrow. But, um…” He met my eyes through his lashes. “Do you want to get together again?”
My heart jumped. “Sure. Yeah.”
Aiden smiled, and I hadn’t realized how tense his neck and shoulders were until they relaxed a bit. “Great. I’m off work tomorrow at four. Since you seem to know the island pretty well, maybe you could show me some other place?”
“Yeah, definitely.”
“I’ll text you directions to my apartment.” He picked up his pizza. “Meet me there at four thirty, five or so?”
“You bet.”
Chapter Three
Aiden
Paperwork. I’d been doing something involving…paperwork. It was probably important—at least to whoever was waiting for it, anyway—but hell if I could remember what I was supposed to be doing with it.
Blinking a few times, I tried to make sense of the papers and printed words fanned out on the desk in front of me. I’d been working on them, making progress, and then…not.
I rewound the last few minutes, trying to figure out where things had gone wrong. A few minutes ago, Lieutenant Commander Gonzales had come into the office. She’d given me that stack of folders. Right. Got it.
“My God, Ensign.” She’d grimaced. “What in the world happened to you?”
“What happ— Oh, this?” I’d gestured at my face and then shrugged. “Had a graceful moment up at Hiji Falls over the weekend.”
Oh.
Right.
That.
She left, and my mind went right back to Hiji Falls, and paperwork? What paperwork?
Sitting back in my chair, I sighed. Hiji Falls. Connor. Friday night had been one of the worst nights of my life, but damn, Sunday had been a switch. The hike had been therapeutic in its own right, giving me a chance to relax and catch my breath and try to make sense of having my ass handed to me two nights prior, but when I’d reached the falls…
I shivered and closed my eyes. Could he have been a little less gorgeous? Maybe not fucked with my blood pressure quite so much?
Oh hell. Who was I kidding? I’d loved it. Every second of it. And I still loved it, because it hadn’t ended when we’d gone our separate ways. Even after his taillights had disappeared on the highway and I’d been on my own, flying along the coastline on my way back to the base, I’d been dizzy and distracted and barely kept myself from chasing him down and maybe even working up the nerve to move in for that elusive kiss.
I hadn’t, though. I still wasn’t even sure if Connor was gay. Not that he could have made it much more obvious. Seriously, what was I waiting for? An engraved invitation? A neon sign saying I’m gay, I’m attracted, and if you don’t kiss me, I’m gone?
Something told me if I did kiss him, I’d be the one who was gone, probably in the form of smoke and ashes. Even Glenn—prior to becoming a colossal douche bag—hadn’t been as attractive as Connor, and the more time I spent with Connor, the more I was liable to—
Hey. Lange. Paperwork. Pronto.
I shook my head and looked at the paperwork again.
And of course, my mind drifted right back. To the falls, to the drive, to that pizza we’d shared high above the East China Sea. There was no way in hell I’d ever find that pizza place again. Not without Connor’s license plate in front of me the whole way. I didn’t even remember what the food tasted like. It was good, that much I remembered, but everything else was a blank.
Everything else, I thought as I tried for the hundredth time to focus on my paperwork. Good God. What the hell was wrong with me? I hadn’t been this caught up with someone in ages. Not since Cadet Williams at the Academy. And even that little fling didn’t hold a candle to this. Or maybe it just didn’t seem to, since I was comparing something that had faded a year or so ago to something that had only been going for like twenty-four hours and hadn’t even gotten off the ground. I might’ve gotten this giddy and spacey over him. I didn’t remember. What was I thinking about again?
Oh.
Right.
Connor.
Again.
I scrubbed a hand over my face and immediately regretted it when my finger rubbed painfully over the stitches above my eye.
My phone rang, startling me out of my thoughts. When I answered, the well-rehearsed greeting came out automatically: “ATO office, this is Ensign Lange. How may I help you, sir or ma’am?”
“Ensign, it’s General Bradshaw,” came the low, grumbled response. “I need that threat-assessment package for Gates 1 and 3. How are you coming on that?”
I pulled the drab-green folder from my inbox and glanced at it. “It’s nearly done, sir. Just needs a signature from Colonel Patterson.”
“Drop it by my office before the end of the day.”
“Will do, sir.”
After we’d hung up, I figured I wasn’t going to get much done that required actual concentration, so I might as well start making my daily rounds for signatures, stamps and approval. Along with the threat assessment Bradshaw had asked for, I gathered up the rest of the documents that needed to be approved by various officers and headed out of my office.
First stop, Colonel Patterson’s office.
God, please let him be in a decent mood today.
I didn’t just work with Navy at this command. Kadena was primarily an Air Force base, and our particular building had everybody. Navy. Air Force. Marines. I thought I saw some Army guys around one day, probably from Torii Station, their base a few clicks up the road. Joint commands didn’t bother me. High-ranking officers didn’t bother me either—I respected rank but wasn’t intimidated by it—which was good, since I worked with captains, colonels, a general and the odd admiral on a daily basis. But some of the particular captains, colonels and generals? Jesus, these guys could be assholes.
At the end of the hall, I stopped in front of the colonel’s office.
Cringing, I knocked on the door.
“Come in.” Terse but not angry. Good. Ever since the man’s wife had taken the kids and gone back stateside, he’d been almost as volatile as that asshole Commander Morris. If either of them had been allowed to drink at work, there would have been a fistfight in this building by now.
I stepped into the office. “Good morning, Colonel.”
“Ensign,” he muttered.
I pulled three folders off the stack tucked under my arm and handed them to him.
Colonel Patterson perused the folders, then tossed them aside and muttered, “Dismissed, Ensign.”
“Thank you, sir.”
I quickly left his office and continued down the hall, waiting until I was a few doors down before I exhaled. That man was seriously not good for my blood pressure.
Once I’d shrugged Colonel Patterson away, I continued down the hall to the next office. I knocked on General Bradshaw’s door, and he gruffly told me to come in.
“Sir,” I said with a slight nod. I handed the stack of folders to him over the top of his desk and then stood back and waited to be dismissed.
General Bradshaw scowled as he skimmed over the threat assessment. He was tough to read. Did the scowl mean he’d found something he didn’t like? Or was he just focusing on the words? I hoped to God it was the latter. I’d been on the receiving end of a few of his notorious tirades, and now I made triple sure all my i’s were dotted and my t’s were crossed before I put anything in front of him.
Finally, he put the documents aside. “Dismissed, Ens
ign.”
“Thank you, sir.” I left his office and continued getting signatures and dispersing documents to those who needed them. Much as the task annoyed me sometimes, it was the most brainless part of my job, and it was welcome today. Something I could accomplish even while I was mentally elsewhere.
On the way back to my office, I passed by Commanders Mays and Morris. Mays gave me a slight nod, but Morris avoided eye contact and did a piss-poor job of hiding the disgust curling his lip. I just waited until we’d passed, and then rolled my eyes. I’d only been here a short while, and I’d already learned to brush off Commander Morris’s scowls and glares. Scuttlebutt had gotten around, and I knew what his problem was.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You’ve figured out I’m gay, and you don’t like queers. Whatever, dude.
I was a few steps past them when Mays said, “Oh hey, Ensign.”
I turned around. “Yes, sir?”
“I looked over your Island Indoc PowerPoint, and it looks good, but how about a couple more slides emphasizing the off-limits areas?”
“Sure, I can do that.”
“Good. E-mail it to me as soon as you can.”
“Yes, sir. Will do.”
I waited until he’d dismissed me and I was on my way down the hall before I rolled my eyes. Island Indoc. Awesome. It was the briefing everyone had to endure when they first came to Okinawa, and one of those things that made the word “briefing” hilariously ironic. More like ten hours of my life I was never getting back. There were presentations on things everyone already knew about, like not shoplifting, or drinking and driving, and maybe five minutes of actual valuable shit, like Japanese etiquette and a few necessary phrases.
Fortunately, I only had to show up for my own presentation now, and I tried my damnedest not to bore the crowd out of their skulls. Death by PowerPoint sucked for everyone, myself included. I kept mine as short as possible, but invariably someone—like Commander Mays, in this case—wanted me to add slides. At least he only wanted me to add two. Captain Warren had nearly doubled the length of my last presentation.
I headed back toward my office to dive into PowerPoint and try not to bore myself into a coma. Maybe I could combine the information he wanted onto one slide. It was pretty simple. No reason it needed to be on two. I could always—
“Ensign Lange.”
I turned around to see Commander Connelly leaning out of his office. “Yes, sir?”
“Would you mind stepping in here for a minute?”
I glanced at the papers in my hand, which I needed to take care of before the end of the day. But when a commander said “jump”…
I followed him into his office.
He closed the door behind us. That was a little disconcerting. He wasn’t in my chain of command. I didn’t answer to him. There really was no reason I could think of for us to meet behind closed doors.
“Have a seat, Ensign.” He gestured at one of the chairs in front of his desk.
With no clue why, I did as I was told, keeping the folders full of signed documents securely in both hands in my lap.
Connelly sat back in his chair. “Looks like you did quite a number on your face.”
My cheeks burned. “Just a little mishap up at Hiji Falls.”
“I see.” His skepticism turned my stomach. No one else had given me any reason to think they didn’t believe me, but Commander Connelly didn’t seem convinced.
And so what if he wasn’t? What did he care?
He leaned forward and folded his arms on the edge of his desk. “This conversation is entirely off the record, Ensign.”
I swallowed. Hadn’t I heard almost those exact words recently? “Okay…”
“And it’s man to man. All this?” He gestured at the insignia on his uniform. “Just ignore it for a minute, okay?”
“Uh…”
“My name’s Shane, by the way.”
I chewed my lip. “Aiden.”
“All right. Aiden.” He tilted his head slightly. “Have you ever met an MA1 Randall?”
All the blood slipped out of my face. “I…”
He smiled. “Relax. I’m not interrogating you here, and nothing leaves this room.”
“Then maybe you could tell me why we’re having this conversation?”
He regarded me silently for a moment. Then, speaking even quieter now, he said, “He’s the one who told you to go up to Hiji Falls, isn’t he?”
My heart stopped. “What? He said that was confidential, and—” And I just admitted it. Way to go, Lange.
Shane put up a hand. “Relax. He didn’t give me details, and he didn’t mention your name. He just told me that some ensign came into the ER with”—he gestured at his face—“some cuts and bruises. Said the kid was afraid of being outed.”
Outed. Oh fuck.
I chewed my lip but couldn’t look at the commander.
“When you came in this morning,” he went on, “I put two and two together. Kind of guessed it was you.”
I still kept my gaze down and hoped I could keep my lunch down too. Fuck. Fuck, this wasn’t—
“Look at me, Ensign.” His voice was gentler than I expected.
Cringing inwardly, I lifted my gaze. There was nothing but kindness and empathy in his eyes, but I still couldn’t relax. Not when he knew.
“Do you want to know why MA1 Randall was talking to me about this in the first place?
Now that you mention it…
I just nodded.
Shane glanced at the door, a subtle but surprising display of nerves. When he met my eyes again, he said, “MA1 Randall is my boyfriend.”
“He’s…” I blinked a few times. “You’re…”
“He is, and I am. The reason he was telling me about you was because he was upset about what happened to you. And the reason I called you in here is that I wanted you to know you’re not the only one. I know how rough it is, even these days. I just wanted to let you know that if anyone hassles you, my door is always open.”
I didn’t even know what to say. “I…”
“How was Hiji Falls, anyway?”
Oh, it was much better than I thought it would be…
“It was nice,” I said. “Hell of a hike.”
“It is a nice one, isn’t it?” Shane said. “Anyway, I just wanted to let you know the door’s open, and you’re not alone.”
I got up. “Thank you, Commander.”
“You’re welcome. And I mean it. Door’s open any time you need it.”
“I appreciate it.” I reached for the door, opened it, but then paused. After a second, I closed the door again. As I faced Shane, I said, “Just one question.”
“Hmm?”
“You said you and Randall are…”
Shane nodded.
“But isn’t he…” I gestured at my insignia.
The commander stiffened slightly. “Yes.” His eyebrows rose a little, and I thought I heard an unspoken is my secret safe with you?
“Oh.” I shrugged. “I was just curious.”
He didn’t relax.
“Not a word,” I said. “Promise.”
After a second, the tension in his shoulders eased. “Thanks.”
I pulled his door closed behind me and exhaled. Maybe the other night with Glenn had a silver lining after all. He’d rattled me, split my eyebrow and bloodied my knuckles, but I’d gained a pair of allies in both MA1 Randall and Commander Connelly.
And I’d stumbled across Connor.
Connor, who I’d see in just a couple of hours.
Smiling to myself, I headed back to my office to count down to four o’clock.
Chapter Four
Connor
Just left the office. Meet you at my place in 20?
I was out of my desk chair and halfway down the hall before I’d even finished reading Aiden’s message. On the way down the stairs, I wrote back, See you then.
My stepmother, Hitomi, was in the kitchen with my little sister and glanced up as I passed through. �
��Going out?”
“Yep,” I threw over my shoulder. “I’ll be out late.”
“Have fun.” At least she never asked questions. My dad hadn’t quite accepted the fact that even though I lived with him, I was an adult. If he’d been here now, he’d have grilled me about the where, when and—most importantly—with whom of my plans for the evening. The joys of still living at home.
But he wasn’t due back from work for an hour yet, so I slipped out the front door, got in my car and headed out of housing. Aiden had sent me directions to his place earlier, and I followed those off the base and up the highway.
~*~
His apartment was out near White Beach in a small cluster of pastel-colored concrete cubes behind the shopping mall. A pair of foot-tall terra-cotta shi shi dogs flanked the entrance to the tight parking lot, and I squeezed my car in between a souped-up sports car and a minivan, both with Japanese plates. Most of the plates in the lot were Japanese owned, aside from one faded-green Nissan that was American owned.
As I was getting out of my car, a familiar beat-up car pulled in, and my heart skipped when I glimpsed Aiden’s face through the windshield. I waved, and he waved back, and I waited while he parked in one of the narrow reserved spots closer to the building.
His engine shuddered and then quieted. My heart beat a little faster, especially as the driver’s side door opened. As Aiden stepped out of his car, I tried like hell not to drool. Back at Hiji, I’d suspected he usually kept his hair pristine and perfect, and I was right. The wind was playing with it a little, but it was combed into place like he’d spent hours on it this morning.
And he was Navy, apparently. They were the only ones who had those bright-white uniforms, and Aiden was born to wear it. It was like those white pants had been designed specifically for Aiden’s ass, and I looked the hell away because my shorts had definitely not been designed to accommodate a stealth boner.