“Nell Sawyer!” I pull her into a tight embrace. “You are a sight for sore eyes.” I take her in with her silver glowing hair, her wrinkles, her wide grin and knowing eyes. “How I’ve missed you!”
“Tell me everything. Start with the juicy bits, would you? What about those men?”
“Noah basically told me to stay out of the investigation—specifically with those thieves who were responsible for the bank heist. Then I told him to stay out of my investigation, and that I was the best and didn’t really need him. It got pretty ugly.”
“Oh dear. Then what?”
“Then I pretty much turned on Everett, too, and I left. Everett texted as soon as I got home with just one word, Lemon. But strangely enough, I could feel the emotion behind it. And, of course, Noah texted, too, asking if we could get together today and have coffee.”
“Did you answer? It would be immature of you not to have done so,” she scolds me sweetly, and I can’t help but smile.
“I did. I said no. Then he asked if later this week would work better, and that’s the text I didn’t respond to. I never claimed to be mature.”
“Oh heavens.” She rolls her eyes. “Go on. Get your day going. I’m not here to slow you down. In fact, let me help you.”
Nell dons an apron, and sure enough we crank out my morning inventory in half the time and all the while chatting up a storm about anything and everything.
“It’s almost time to open the doors.” I give her a wry smile. “Spill it, Nell. Tell me who those men are.”
“Have you looked into the clue that Max gave you?”
“About the string of robberies spanning from the bottom of the country on up? It seems like a daunting task.”
“It won’t be. Noah has already done it, and he’s figured out exactly who they are.” She lifts a glowing brow. “With a little elbow grease, you could easily catch up with Noah. Are you going to let him best you?”
I gasp at the thought. “Certainly not.” I glance to the clock. “It’s time to open up shop, but I can assure you, this day doesn’t end without me diving into the deep end of that mystery.”
The morning rush never lets up. In fact, it morphs right into the afternoon rush with Britney’s Swift Cycle castoffs—she sends her clients my way to gain back their calories, and I don’t mind one bit. Of course, this usually sends Britney herself and Cormack, her forever sidekick.
They come this way swinging their matching blonde ponytails, Britney’s left eye safely hidden from the world by a loose lock of hair.
“Did you hear the news?” Britney chortles as she says it.
Lily scuttles over. “News? What news?” Lily is a gossip in training, so I understand her need to know.
Britney looks to Cormack. “Go ahead and spill it, Mac and Cheese.”
I can’t help but feel a little vindicated when Britney gifts her the silly nickname. Neither of them has ever gotten my name right.
Cormack sniffs with pride. “It’s official. Noah and I have entered into couple’s counseling. After much research, Noah has decided on the exact counselor he and Britney saw to oversee the dissolution of their marriage.”
Britney grunts, “That wasn’t the point. But it will be for you.”
Cormack waves her away. “Don’t listen to her, girls”—she leans in—“bitter grapes. Noah and I have begun our journey to the altar. Everyone knows the church recommends a series of counseling sessions before you tie the knot. And next June will be here before you know it.”
I’m not sure how much more of this delusional soon-to-be jilted June bride I can take.
Carlotta and my aunt Becca all head in at once, and Nell zooms forward.
“Here are the girls I long to see,” Nell sings dreamily at the sight of them.
Lily takes Britney and Cormack’s orders while I wave them over.
Becca taps into her phone. “I’ve just texted Keelie.” She wrinkles her nose. Becca is Keelie and Naomi’s mother. She has amazing creamy blonde hair with crimson highlights and high cheekbones that would make any supermodel envious.
No sooner does she say those words than my best friend appears and wraps an arm around my shoulder.
“What’s going on, ladies?”
Nell purrs with delight. “What’s going on indeed?”
Keelie gasps as she looks around, “I could have sworn I just heard Grammy Nell!”
Both Nell and I exchange a horrifying glance, and she’s quick to make a zipping motion across her lips as if she were sealing them up. In all fairness, Keelie is touching me so that makes anything Nell says fair game.
Becca looks up at Carlotta from under her lashes. “That would be a bit serendipitous. And knowing our spunky mother, she would indeed be here if she could. We’ve got news on the will. My brother’s court date is next Thursday. We’re all invited to the Ashford Courthouse to see what the judge will decide.”
My body breaks out into a sweat all at once. When Nell passed away last January, she stipulated in her will that I get the lion’s share of her real estate empire. Of course, she gave each of her children enough to live comfortably on, but that wasn’t nearly enough for my new uncle William. A part of me can’t blame him. Nobody even knew I was related until that very moment.
“I guess I’d better be there.”
Carlotta gets a glazed look in her eyes. “We’re all going to be there, Lottie, and we’re all going to cheer when my greedy brother eats crow.”
I sigh. “Please don’t let this drive a wedge between you. Even if the judge doesn’t dismantle the will, I’ll certainly give everything I gain right back to the three of you.”
“Don’t you dare!” both Carlotta and Nell shout in unison.
Keelie wraps her arms around her body and shudders.
“Fine,” I say. We’ll cross that burned bridge when we come to it.
Mom, Carlotta, and Becca put in an order and take a seat.
Keelie is about to take off, and I catch her by the elbow.
“What are you doing tonight?” I ask, hopeful that her calendar is clear.
A devilish gleam comes to her eyes as she swoops in close. “You tell me, Lottie Lemon. I hope there’s a good time involved because I’ve been itching to cut loose.”
“You bet there is. I’ll pick you up at seven.”
“Great!” she sings as she takes off.
“Don’t you want to know where we’re going?”
“I don’t care! As long as I’m with you, I know we’re in for a good time!”
It will be a time, all right.
I glance back to find Nell seated at the table with her daughters and my mother. If I didn’t know better, it looks as if she’s still among the living.
The crowd has settled, so I ask Lily to man the fort for a moment. I head to the back and steal a moment to huddle in my office as I run a search on my phone, looking for a chain of robberies, thefts, or home invasions all over the country. And what I find is staggering similarities to the events in Honey Hollow regarding the home robberies and the bank heist. Similar events happened in Florida just eight weeks ago, South Carolina seven weeks ago, Virginia six weeks ago, Pennsylvania four weeks ago, and New York three weeks ago. The bank robbery consisted of six gunmen, each in masks. The masks are always different—clowns, monsters, animals.
Son of a gun.
Six sons of guns.
Nell was right. With a little elbow grease, I could easily catch up with Noah.
And catch up I did.
According to Nell, they’re still in town. That means there’s still time to catch them. I wonder where they’ll strike next?
I wonder…
* * *
The Egyptian Room is on the border of Leeds and Ashford, and since I’m not crazy about the dicey proximity to the aforementioned sleazy town, I’ve asked Meg to tag along. She didn’t spend the last few years on the Las Vegas wrestling circuit without a few moves to show for it. She can headlock with the best of them. Besides, I’m
down one Glock at the moment. Boy, how I miss Ethel. And here she didn’t even have a name while she was with me.
The Egyptian Room is a restaurant up front and a belly dancing studio in the rear.
Meg shakes her head as we’re led toward our belly dancing nirvana by a woman in silk pink and gold pajamas.
“Business in the front, party in the back.” My sister shoots me a sly eye. “Do your boyfriends know you’re on the loose tonight?”
Keelie snickers. “Please, Lottie’s on their radar. Not only that, but Noah told her he’s got a tracking device on her car. I wouldn’t be surprised if we bumped into them to—”
She stops mid-sentence, and every part of me freezes when I see it myself.
“Noah?” I step off the beaten path and stagger into the dining room to find him seated with Cormack enjoying what looks to be delicious Egyptian cuisine.
“Lottie.” His lids fly up like roller shades. “I can explain.”
Cormack swats him with her linen napkin, and personally I’m cheering her on in that department.
“We just came from our very first couple’s counseling session.” She giggles like a schoolgirl. Cormack looks exquisite tonight in a bright red dress, her hair glossy in perfect gold ringlets running down her back. “And guess what? He’s signed us up for a couple’s belly dancing lesson! Isn’t that perfectly romantic?”
Meg laughs under her breath. “Perfectly.”
“So that’s what this is about,” I mutter. “I can’t be a part of your schemes because you already have a partner—your fiancé.” I turn Meg back around and we join Keelie and the waitress kind enough to navigate us to the bowels of this establishment. “Onward and forward.” I’m getting to Janelle first.
The studio in the back is spacious and airy. The floors are comprised of dark stained wood, and there’s an oversized mirror that takes up the entire wall in front of us.
A smattering of women and couples are already here, and I spot Janelle herself right up front. I don’t waste any time as I speed over.
“Janelle Hastings?” I say in that exaggerated tone people utilize for the classmates of yesteryear. “Is that you?”
Of course, it’s her. That blonde hair of hers is swept up into a bun, and she looks just as perky and delightful as she was the night I met her. Her nose is turned up a hair, and her lips are naturally pouty. She has an air of likability about her and an—owl over her shoulder.
“Boo!” Owlbert chortles and hoots as he floats above her. “She’s the one, isn’t she, Lottie? That’s why you’re here. That’s why I’m here!”
I twist my lips at him before reverting my attention to her. “Amanda introduced us that horrible night. I’m so sorry for your loss.”
“Oh my goodness, yes!” Her whole affect brightens. “What in the world are you doing here?”
Meg pops up next to me. “It’s her bachelorette party. We’re hoping you can teach her all the tips and tricks to keep her man happy at home.”
A guttural laugh emits from her. “You betcha. Hey? When’s the wedding?”
“July,” I say without thinking and cringe on cue once I realize the proximity of my bachelorette party to the main event.
“Wow, you’re really starting early, but I commend you.” She winces. “Amanda wasn’t your wedding planner, was she?”
“She sure was.”
“Well, don’t worry. I hear Hazel has absorbed all of her clients.” She rolls her eyes. “Hazel has spent her whole life living in Amanda’s shadow. I guess you could say she’s really stepping into her own these days—her own sister’s life.”
I sort of came to that conclusion myself.
“Come on. It’s time to get started!” She claps the class to attention, and we’re all positioned to stand in rows.
Noah and Cormack sneak in the back just as the music gets going. It’s twangy and sultry, and every now and then it sounds as if someone is clanging pots and pans.
Noah scoots in close to me.
“Lottie.” His dimples dig in deep, and he has that look on his face as if imploring me to understand.
“Don’t you Lottie me.”
“Lottie?” Janelle waves from the front. “Since you’re the bride-to-be, let’s have you come up and demonstrate.”
Noah’s brows arch. “Bride-to-be?”
“That’s right, Detective Fox. Two can play at that game. And who knows? I may not be playing.”
I make my way up front, and Janelle teaches me how to sway and swivel my hips with the best of them.
“All right!” Janelle cries out over the music as Owlbert floats in our midst, observing the masses while purring like a feline. He’s a boy that way. He’s probably enjoying this immensely. They often do.
“Lottie, your husband is really going to thank you once he sees his big surprise!” Janelle doesn’t mind throwing it out there, and I look to make sure Noah is receiving it. Sure enough, he looks as if he’s about to be sick. “Now let’s get a couple down here.”
Cormack hops up and barks like a seal until Janelle waves them down front, and I’m quick to reprise my spot between Keelie and Meg.
“All right, mister,” Janelle belts it out to Noah. “Hold her by the hips and really feel her move.” Cormack does her best to swivel as if her relationship hinged on every move those hips were capable of. “See this, Lottie? This is how you’ll encourage your partner to participate. There is nothing more sensual than having the love of your life share this delicate dance with you.”
Or with Cormack.
Cormack shakes a little too hard, her hips a little too eager to grind their way over to Noah’s, and Janelle shakes her head at the maneuver.
“No, no.” Janelle plucks Cormack out of Noah’s arms. “Lottie, why don’t you come down here and show Cormack how you move and glide? It needs to be loose and fluid. Lottie, you really are a natural.”
Meg shoves me forward. “Go on Lot. Show ’em what you got.”
I growl at both her and Janelle—and mostly Noah.
Owlbert buzzes from above. “This is amazing, Lottie! It seems at every turn you and Noah are forced into one another’s arms. It must be fate.”
“Or very bad timing,” I mutter as I step up, and Janelle lands Noah’s hot hands over my hips. I can still feel the heat from Cormack’s body on his sticky fingers, and it makes my blood boil.
Janelle moves my hips and away I go.
“Very good!” She offers me a spontaneous applause. “Keep it up until the music stops.” She takes off to bark out orders at the rest of the class while I wiggle for Noah, and Cormack huffs at our side.
“She’s right.” Noah’s dimples look as if they’re mocking me. “You’re a natural, Lottie.” His eyes glaze over with lust, and soon enough he’s bedroom eyeing me. “Come over tonight,” he whispers it low—lest his fiancée hear the salacious offer.
“I can’t. I have to show off my moves to Everett.”
He frowns. “Word on the street is you’re giving him the cold shoulder, too.”
“Word on the street is that I don’t like that word on the street that the two of you are sharing words behind my back.” I don’t even care if that made one iota of sense. I’m sick and tired of Noah trying to protect me by way of leaving me in the dark. “And guess what? I found a pattern of break-ins and bank heists that fit the pattern of those imbeciles who held us up. It stems from Florida to South Carolina”—I watch as his eyes enlarge as I go on—“Virginia to Pennsylvania to—”
“New York to Vermont.” He closes his eyes a moment as I swivel in close.
“You know?”
“Of course, I know,” he smothers the words with ego.
“What else do you know?”
He looks perturbed by the conversation. “That’s for me to know and for you not to find out. Lottie, please.”
“Cormack?” I slip out of his grasp and pull her in my place. “Dance for your fiancé. It really is such an aphrodisiac.”
The class wraps up, and I sic both Meg and Keelie on Noah. Under no circumstances are they to let him out of their sight.
I head over to Janelle as she’s packing up her things.
“Wonderful class. Expect a basket of muffins sent over by my fiancé. Baked by me, of course.” I belt out a laugh as Owlbert lands heavy on my shoulder. Geez! He weighs as much as a toddler. “So, what do you think happened to Amanda? I mean, she told me all about that drama between her and Connie before she passed. You don’t think Connie did her in, did you?”
Too much? I can’t tell, but I thought it was best to get it out there.
Her blue eyes jet out like hardboiled eggs. “She told you that? I thought she’d go to the grave denying it. You know, to hear Mark tell it, he’s the innocent one in all this. He’s just trying to save face by going around telling anyone who’ll listen that he broke up with Connie first like a real gentleman blah, blah, blah.” She makes a face. “The truth is, he was two-timing Connie for months.”
“With Amanda?”
She nods. “Amanda had the perfect cover. She told Connie that she and Mark had real estate to look at, and it was true in the beginning. Soon enough, they were doing it in every empty house in Honey Hollow.” Lainey’s new house comes to mind and I cringe. “Her brothers got wind of it. That’s when the relationship hit the fan and he really broke it off with Connie.”
“How did Connie react?”
“She didn’t.” She slips a backpack over her shoulder, indicating she’s ready to leave. “That’s the strange part, don’t you think?”
“Are you’re implying Connie did this?”
“I don’t know. There are so many other things that were going wrong for poor Amanda. That whole drama with her parents dying. Slater wasn’t happy at all.”
“What drama was that? Who’s Slater?”
“Her brother. Apparently, there was some glitch in the will—or with some bank account? I’m not really up on the details, but Amanda thought she’d better lawyer up and Connie was going to set her up with her gal.”
Toxic Apple Turnovers: MURDER IN THE MIX 13 Page 10